I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.
sometimes it just ends up being something like
ITS BACK
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
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@theallseeingeyess
I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.
sometimes it just ends up being something like
ITS BACK
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
They went to grab some snacks for the sleepover :D
Most Asked Questions - "Bruce Wayne."
Bruce Wayne answers the internet' most asked questions.
I often wonder what happened to authors of unfinished fanfictions.
I hope they’re having a nice life
we absolutely are not and that unfinished fic haunts us to this day
Reblog if that unfinished fic haunts you to this day
I know I paused it then abandoned it I know I should orphan it but I don’t feel like doing so
unfortunately i got my start of wattpad and I can’t orphan fics there
i’m just taking a break… ch4 tomorrow…
three days later and ch4 is still not out, sorry peeps
Stabilize our trajectory please
Pitch up
Pitch down
Left rudder
Right rudder
Left roll
Right roll
No1 engine thrust
No2 engine thrust
Flap angle
Altitude
I just wanna see how we crash this plane
# of likes = # of passengers on board
# of reblogs = # of flight hours the pilots have
Good luck soldiers
Dysphoria is strong today ☹️
Reblog to kill the dysphoria in prevs head and heart.
“modern au” “highschool au” human/non-powered au"
Why don’t you just watch glee then.
I use this to torture my victims:
they throw regular rats at eachother
group photo!
( Bruce and Tim working on old cold cases down in the cave)
Bruce: Hey Tim, how are you getting on over there you've been a bit quiet
(Silence)
Bruce: Tim?
( Tim lightly snoring asleep)
Bruce: Oh
(Bruce lightly shaking Tim's shoulder)
Bruce: Tim, sweetheart, you gotta wake up
( Tim sitting bolt-up-right)
Tim: Whatizit ima wake
Bruce: Relax, you should just go home now it's getting late
Tim: Oh right, yeah I've finished this case anyway
Bruce: All of it ??
Tim: Yep
Bruce: Oh good job
( Alfred appearing at the caves entrance)
Alfred: Master Tim I'll drive you home now
Tim: oh cool, thanks for taking me on patrol Dad
Bruce:
Tim:
Alfred:
Tim: Uhh Alfred
Alfred: Yes my boy
Tim: Did I just call B Dad
Alfred: I believe you did young sir
( Dick strolling in)
Dick: OH MY GOD WHY IS B CRYING WHAT HAPPENED
Batfamily Comm Lines pt. 16
Damian: Is that Drake over there?
Jason: Yep. Barbs, can you link us to his comm line, please?
Oracle: *low chucking* Have funnn.
*typing noises, comm line pings*
Jason: Replacement, what's up? Thought it was your night off.
Tim: *grumbling* Suppose to be but Dick’s been kidnapped and B's at some W.E function.
Jason: *chuckling* You'd think Dick's asking for this shit to happen at this point.
Tim: Right?! He's been snatched up more than all of us combined.
Damian: Is this a common occurrence or…?
Jason: All of us have been kidnapped at some point. Never longer than a day though.
Damian: *sarcastically* Oh that is just-How comforting.
Tim: *humming* He still has his comms so he’s been contacting me.
Jason: *snorting* No shot. Those dumbasses didn’t frisk him?
Damian: We fought an adult who uses condiments as his main form of weapons last week but two random men not frisking Grayson is unbelievable?
Tim: Shut up. I'll link you two to the comm line.
*comm line pings*
Dick: How much are you asking for? Oh. No. Nothing-Just. He’s a billionaire, ya know? You could ask for more.
Damian: *disbelief* Mother sent me to Gotham to widen my horizons and my eldest brother is giving his kidnappers ransom advice.
Jason: *laughing* It's kinda insulting when they try to lowball your abduction, you know?
Damian: *deadpanned* Fortunately, Father has several sons remaining should they kill Grayson.
Tim: *snickering*
*the sound of a door closing can be heard*
Dick: Alrighty. They left.
Tim: Where'd they go?
Dick: What makes you think that my kidnappers told me where they were going?
Damian: I do not understand why you don’t simply break out from your bonds and escape. You are a trained vigilante.
Dick: That’s Nightwing. I’m a citizen right now. I can't just cartwheel my way out and knock 'em out.
Jason: Bruce said to always wait for someone to show up, can't risk our cover being blown.
Damian: So I am just meant to allow myself to be taken? The contingency plan is to remain a damsel in distress?
Tim: *snickering* I think you'd piss them off so quick that they'd return your ass.
Jason: *clapping noises* Do you remember when I got kidnapped the first time and I was like *wheezes* so over the bullshit that I annoyed them and they broke my nose-
Damian: Do you remember when you annoyed the monks Grandfather had invited? One of them broke his monastic silence to scold you.
Dick: *cackling* YOU FUCKING JACKASS.
Jason: *giggling* Hey- Hey, I was asking if they could teach me those techniques that B knows. Those Tibetan Monks taught him fucking everything. Anyways-Obviously after, the police had to document it for evidence and Dick was like ' What adult hasn't hit you?'
Tim: And people still think Dick is a little fucking goody-two shoes. Dick needed to medicated.
Dick: *grunting slightly* He switched my lactose-free milk to regular, I was blowin' up the toilet all night *wheezes* Alright, the ropes off, come in and save me, cupcake. I can hear them coming up the stairs.
Damian: *disgusted* Were you drugged? I say we let them keep him.
Dick: Thanks for the concern of my well-being, Dami.
Damian: This is not the first or last time you will be abducted. I’m saving my concern for something more imminent.
Tim: Gotta do everything myself. I'll be right there *grappling hook noise*
*Tim grunting as he opens the window, slipping in. Door opening can be heard*
Unidentified male voice in the background: Oh shit.
Dick: Oh my-It's Red Robin. *swooning voice* He's come to rescue me from you naughty boys. Help me, Red Robin!
Tim: I know this is a hostage negotiation thing ya got going but if you wanna shoot him, I'll look the other way.
Dick: What the fuck. You're suppose to be my hero!
Unidentified male voice in the background: I was just trying to get money for the boy but-I guess we can hold Robin hostage too..
Tim: *irritated* Red Robin. It's Red Robin. Not Robin. I’m not a twelve year old boy.
Unidentified second male voice: Well to be fair, you guys all look the fucking same after a while. How’s someone suppose to know?
Dick: *wheezing* He is so right. You two look exactly alike. Got that same build.
Damian: *hissing into the comm* Drake has that malnutrition build that people form when they lose a spleen. My body is a temple.
Tim: Shoot him. JUST SHOOT HIM. FORGET THE MONEY. I HEARD BRUCE WAYNE HAS LOTS OF KIDS. HE CAN BURY THIS ONE NEXT TO JASON TODD.
Jason: What the fuck did I do!
*gunshot ringing out*
Tim:-JOKING. I WAS JOKING. *punching noises can be heard*
Dick: Oh no! The violence! My poor eyes. Where is Bruce? I want my dad!
Jason: Babs, next time don't link us to Tim's line.
Oracle: I told you to have fun *snickering*
Damian: Should I ever get kidnapped, are you going to behave this way?
Jason: Who says I'm answering your call?
Damian: JACKASS-
Batfamily Comm Lines pt.12
* the sound of grunting and air whooshing can be heard*
Dick: *sighs* Damn, I am tired. I nearly missed the ledge.
Tim: Shit, me too. What is it with Gotham tonight?
Dick: No clue, I’m comming Jay and Damian. See if we can wrap this up fucking soon.
*comm line pings*
* boots crunching on glass*
Jason: Sometimes you gotta just rip a cigarette, you know what I mean?
Damian: *silent for a moment* No. Not really…But whatever helps you.
Tim: Question and I’m trying my best to phrase this super delicately.
Jason: Yeah?
Tim: How are you not a drug addict? Growing up with Willis and your mom in that environment, you had access to so many substances. I’m surprised you never tried drugs.
Damian: You call that delicate? *voice echoing* Hey Hood, in other words, why did your childhood suck?
Dick: The hell are you talking about. Jay use to smoke weed all the time as Robin.
Jason and Damian: *laughing*
Tim: WHAT. BRUCE DOESN’T EVEN LET ME PATROL IF I’M ON PAINKILLERS SOMETIMES.
Jason: Yeah I- *giggling* Use to smoke weed before patrol sometimes. Not all the fucking time, jackass. *wheezing* I was like 14, some of the kids at school started getting into it. I said fuck it and gave in.
Tim: B didn’t notice? How did he not notice?
Jason: Oh he did. *laughing* Took him a couple months but the old man got there.
Dick: *cackling* Tell him, Jay. PLEASE tell him. I love this story.
Jason: B and I were in the middle of taking down some operation down in the Narrows. I’d smoked an hour before patrol and I was really feeling it. But I wasn’t going to pretend to be sick, you know? This is where my desire for Bruce to love me more than Dick was still strong-
Damian: Cannot believe that even in your drugged state, you allowed your parental issues to peak through.
Jason: I WAS IMPRESSIONABLE. Anyways-Bruce was talking to the Commissioner after it all went down. He was tired, he’d been up for two days trying to track down this certain ring. He tried to say “ There are no more perpetrators left in the warehouse.” *cackles*
Dick: *laughing* It’s not funny. It’s not. It *giggling* could have ended poorly.
Damian: These two can never get out a full story without being reduced to laughter. I swear.
Jason: *clears throat* Instead he says,” There are no more warehouses in the perpetrators” before blanking staring off into the distance like he gave some presidential worthy speech *laughing.*
Tim: *laughter growing louder*
Damian: Lord-Father must have been embarrassed.
Dick: HE WAS. Gordon stared at Jason like is he alright but he was already laughing so hard that tears are streaming down. He tried to put a hand out on the wall to steady himself but misses and falls down, landing on a semi truck that was parked below.
Damian: *laughing* Your addiction was discovered by you performing a Falling Graysons move?
Jason: *crying with laughter* The Falling Graysons.
Dick: Asshole. *chortling* He had Jay drug-tested as soon as Alfie cleared him for injuries.
Tim: *mystified* I can’t believe that the second Robin was using drugs.
Jason: You act like I was snorting shit up my nose. It was weed.
Dick: Bruce tried to pull me into the conversation! He was complaining how “ the uniform was being disgraced and we are technically public servants.” All I said was“ it’s not like it’s coke”and he got mad because that wasn’t the point.
Damian: It is also quite hypocritical as Father use to smoke cigarettes.
Jason: FUCKING EXACTLY. He can’t be mad if he was out there smoking.
Tim: Those are two completely different things, you druggie.
Jason: *wistfully* Every substance I have ever abused was truly loved.
Damian: Someone please get me. I need a trusted adult.
Oracle: Batman is requesting to be added into this comm line.
Dick: *humming* Ok, thanks, Babs.
*comm line pings*
Bruce: All four of you please be on the on look-out for any drug activity in downtown Gotham. There appears to be a new batch of unknown drugs hitting the streets.
Damian: *snickering* Maybe Hood will join them.
Bruce: What?
Jason: Don’t tempt me with a good time, old man. *cackles*
Dick: Oh boy.
Jason: *cackling harder* Nostalgia seems to be calling me. Why don’t you and I go out for a quick blunt huh, B?
Bruce: *disconnects from main line*
Damian: Does this mean that it is acceptable for me to partake in the usage of marijuana?
Dick: NO.
So... Kitsunes right?
How many stories have them in some human form and marrying a human?
But they're fox spirits, right? Don't they have fox forms too and not just human ones?
Imagine with me a scene
The hero of a tale has to travel through a reality of forests with varying spirits, they have to find the Kitsune for some reason
Finding the foxes shrine is the best guide. After climbing the stairs and entering what looks like a small space from outside but is far larger inside, the hero expects many things.
The smaller spirits murmur of the Kitsune, the Kitsune's beloved as well. So of course the hero assumed a human spouse. Someone to appeal to for the better nature of the fox spirit.
So when the human hero finds the lounge cushions the very fox like form of the Kitsune. Silvery fur with black and red markings and nine tails. Some sway languidly, others curled up at its side.
"Great Kitsune, I have come to make a request of your endless capabilities."
The massive seeming fox figure lifts its snout. Eyes bright with intelligence as its voice rumbles through the very floors. "You break the peace of this day with your pleading. Make your words swift, and depart."
Not a good start for the hero... They look for the supposed partner with no luck. However, there's no talk of any other Kitsunes here, so all bets are there's a human. Leading to a very bold claim brewing in their mind. "The human town, my town at the base of the mountain is facing an imminent threat."
"You waste my time on a human settlement?" The foxes maw moves unnaturally as it speaks. The fangs far sharper than the more humanoid depictions.
The situation isn't going the way the hero hoped. "I plead for your aid as your spouse would also be affected, no? With my home being the only human settlement on the mountain, it would be where they came from. Could you face them and say you allowed their previous home to be destroyed?"
The Kitsune stares silently. After a moment it lifts two of its nine tails that were splayed along the cushions.
And there, curled up into its side, is a far smaller, average red fox. Nuzzled into the soft silvery fur of the many tails that curl around them like a nest and blanket. The Kitsune grins, all fangs and mirth. "Yes, it will affect my mate. They may run through the forests without fear of your hunters. Of your dogs. I will not need hover so much as I do. The wound your hunters caused is nearly healed, and your town is lucky that the arrow grazed where it was shot to pierce the hide of my mate."
The hero can only balk. The fox spirit was seemingly never considered to have a fox for a mate. Only a human. All of the old depictions paint Kitsune's with humanoid forms and human spouses. So to see such a simple looking fox compared to the large nine tailed silver furred, black and red marked Kitsune certainly leaves one with many questions. "A... Fox?"
Said red fox stirs, shifting and curling up tighter, nudging its muzzle and eyes under one of the many tails that settled around it once more while making a noise. The side unguarded having a freshly healing mark. One that's been meticulously tended to.
The quiet whine draws the Kitsune's attention. Fanged muzzle leaning down to gingerly nudge into the red foxes side. An affectionate gesture. After a moments silence, the sharp eyes of the Kitsune slowly moves back to the hero. "Leave before I revoke your right to return home with your breath in your lungs, little hero."
The hero doesn't wait, running out as quickly as possible. Shadows chasing the hero out rapidly.
Once the room is silent again, the Kitsune sighs, looking down at his little companion and settling it's tails around them once more. With a head lowered to curl around the little red fox, the fox spirit feels its heart at ease once more. A gentle lick against the healing wound and then the top of the little red foxes head calms the Kitsune. Settling down, and falling back into the midday slumber that they had before the rude interruption.
Tip: if boiling oil hisses at you, hiss back! this helps assert your dominance over it.
please no i hate this post. please no
to all of you just silently reblogging from this specific thread, you’re going straight to hell. or gay to hell
*I show up here jus' 'cause*
BOILING OIL IS A LIQUID!
NO. NO PLEASE.
【ROCK BAND】I‘m drawing personal designs for the rock band au again.
Ok so you know the whole batburger gimmick, about it being all bat-related and about his rogues too, no?
The first Bat-Burger opened some time after Jason became Robin and Dick became Nightwing.
The surprise toys at the time were fewer in relation of the vigilantes and more in the theme of the Gotham’ s rogue gallery. For the vigilantes they had: Batman, Batgirl, Nightwing and Robin (a generic one and not 2 separate ones). For the rogue gallery they had the main ones, like: Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Two Face and (but not limited to) The Joker.
After the death of the second Robin, Harley left the Joker and when she was asked the reason she revealed the truth, it was the Joker that killed the second Robin, and with that the news got around, and soon after the Bat-Burger removed all the Joker themed items (both the food and the toys) and with that also the most popular one, the joke rises fries.
After a couple of years that Tim became Robin, and after trying (and failing) to change name and spices for the fries, the Bat-Burger chain reintroduced the Jokerized fries, but removed every other reference to the Joker from their restaurants, but they left Harley’s ones, because she left the Joker after what he did to Jason.
It even crashes like a car in a ps2 game