I am convinced this is what was happening in this scene
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@theclearestglass
I am convinced this is what was happening in this scene
people will describe their incredibly nebulous sexuality to you that they’ve never been able to define and the whole time you’re thinking that sounds like bisexuality brother
Head canon
Ilya turns off his Find My Friend location and Shane gets paranoid when he notices and works up the courage to ask why in the most nonchalant-i trust my boyfriend-he used to be a playboy but he swears he's monogamous now-i can be chill about this kind of way and Ilya is forced to admit that it's because he didn't want Shane to know how often he goes to McDonald's.
Shane says this is worse than cheating.
sorry i said gay when you and your buddy had a massive falling out and tried to kill each other. it just kinda looked like that.
HOUSE, M.D. 6.20 The Choice
As an aroace girly, I think people are placing too much importance on a kiss. It’s not needed when their relationship and bond does all the talking.
i think y'all missed the part where aziraphale never properly apologized or took accountability. Also, you're entirely missing the practical kiss campaign good omens were using to hype up season 3 even after Ne*l Ga*men.
The kiss isnt the real problem. The real problem is the ending makes no actual sense for Aziraphale and Crowley. It destroys everything that s1 and s2 set up. Aziraphale would have never chosen some new world over the world he loved. Thats the point of his character. As god said, hes imperfect and a glutton and a sinner.
The kiss wasn't the problem. It was the character assassination that the show committed at the very end by destroying the previous narratives. S1 and S2 mean nothing when Aziraphale never apologized, and the world they saved got immediately destroyed afterwards.
Meet-cute... love at first sight 🥺 I love them so much. In every universe!
one thing the good omens finale did is convince the world we need an early 2000s style rom com with david tennant and michael sheen and yes i will die on this hill
HEATED RIVALRY | 1.01
“Ilya seems very confident, very controlling. But he’s actually a deeply empathetic and kind lover, and that’s part of his character — that’s a reveal about Ilya. He may not want you to think that, but actually, he’s a really good guy. And part of that is reflected in the fact that he wants Shane to enjoy this too. He’s not looking for selfish sex; they’re both looking for a connection.” ⏤ Jacob Tierney
art
art
I love the implication that doug has been actively hunting down journalists to speak to.
That first interview, he was prepared - standing in the right spot, the journo must have asked them if they wanted to talk to the camera, and chatted to them for a minute or two to check they aren’t going to say anything too crazy while live.
which means that during that quick talk, doug was doing a convincing performance of a nice, upstanding citizen, who loves his sport, yes, but is still civil and friendly about it. Convincing enough that a journo, whose job requires her to ensure there’s no swearing by the drunk hockey fans she interviews, bought it entirely.
and then the second it’s live, and too late, he launches into his speech. And Mitch is also there. And very supportive.
and then when they cut him off, he goes and finds another channel!! Despite the fact that the journalists and cameras often are in the same area as each other, and will share intel with each other (like, “hey, there’s this balding 50-something who is trying to steal the microphone and make Martin Luther look like a runner up in a children’s public speaking competition, look out”) he manages to feign tact and classiness and get in front of a camera again. Icon. Legend. He doesn’t think of himself as bisexual, but only because when he hears bisexual, he thinks of freddie mercury, and doug doubts he could ever live up to freddie mercury.
anyway. I love doug.
Doug is a man on a goddamn mission. He made a plan of action and he fucking executed it. He is such a Specific Breed Of Man in my head and I am so fucking obsessed with him. I like to imagine he has a high achieving daughter studying biochemistry at McGill and she turned on her tv to find her father talking about how he recreationally sucked dick in college. Man of the goddamn year to me
cliff marleau and ilya rozanov are best friends not because they’re teammates or marleau was assigned to look after roz when he first got to the raiders, but because, even though it takes so much alcohol to get him drunk, when ilya gets drunk he can only be described as white girl wasted and marly is the EXACT same way. they are in the mens bathroom in front of the mirror like “is my shirt unbuttoned enough for people to look at my tits?” “yeah man your boobs look GREAT! can you tell me if these jeans look good on my ass i think i saw a girl eying me” “marly your ass looks phenomenal and you can trust me on this as i am a well known ass man” “aw man rozzy you’re making me blush”
they share clothes all of the time, not even really on purpose, they just spend so much time hungover together that things get muddled. this isn't a problem until marley sees shane hollander, wearing his shirt??? obviously he immediately accuses ilya of cheating on him (partying without inviting him to join). shane is visibly devastated, ilya is frantically explaining, and thats how marley is the first person in the nhl to learn about hollanov
inconsequential shane headcanon before bed i think he’s annoyingly good at pool. like he can shoot with his eyes closed and with the stick behind his back and he can hit the most insane combos and he’s a legend at this one dive bar in montreal because he once won a game without the other player ever once getting a turn. and ilya acts sooo bitchy about it cuz he sucks at pool oh look mr. billiards he knows how to hit a ball into a hole with a stick wow so impressive should we throw a party should we call tony soprano? but then shane is like watch i’m gonna send in these three all at the same time and here’s how. and he turns his hat backwards and bends down and pokes his tongue out in concentration and slides the stick between his long thick fingers a few times before he takes the shot and he sinks all 3 balls exactly the way he’d described he would and ilya has to suck him off in the bathroom about it
now complete: autonomic concatenation
the murderbot diaries | MB/ART | sex pollen feat. AAA murderbot | E | 12K words
summary:
I am 22 meters away from your medical suite, I told ART. I’ll be fine. I closed our feed connection. ART immediately reopened the connection. 22.668, it corrected me haughtily. Since you hacked my crew intake system to force the medical forms to list your emergency sexual partner as “null,” you still need to make a plan. I sighed. I’ve had a lot of practice, so it was a really good sigh. You didn’t stop me, I pointed out. Yes. I am regretting that now, it replied, dry.
just posted chapter 2. this fic is now complete!
this one goes out to my fellow asexuals who are fascinated by sexual dilemmas. we are legion. 🎉💅
Jenny Slate, Stage Fright (2019)
Ugly, Bitter, and True by Suzanne Rivecca
John Mulaney on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (2020)
“Robin Williams and Why Funny People Kill Themselves” by David Wong
letters from Medea, salma deera