you can call me kale

i can’t eat bread, i like fish and reptiles, i apologize only a little for king of the hill content / icon from catcrumb pls follow them

[badley]

i am eating chips. i am stress smoking. i am a rat behind a grocery store. i am responding to emails professionally. i am avoiding all texts from friends. i am taking benzodiazepines to call my girlfriend. i am relaxed. i am too stressed out to function. i am a boy king. i am treating my spine like a slinky.

[somethinginthestatic]

you’re gonna say 🗣 that i’m on a high👆horse 🐎 i think that my horse 🐎 is regular sized👌…. did you ever think maybe you’re on a pony🐴 going in circles ⚪️🟣 on a carousel ride 🎠? you’re gonna say i asked for the moon 🌝, i think that it’s you 👉 with your head 🧑 in the sky 🌌. all that i wanted 🙏 was somebody honest ⚖️ living for more ➕ than their next ➡️ good 👍 time ⏰

[dovv]

[997]

never recovered from this

[eilti]

I am crying rn 🤣😭

[tiktokarchive]

[sour-charity]

[ecology-of-the-inhuman]

[marisatomay]

“don’t eat honey because it exploits the bees and they can’t consent!!!” bees are literally unionized and will walk out if they don’t like being in the beekeeper’s hives

[redshiftsinger]

It's true.

I worked with a beekeeper (not at beekeeping, guy had a day job as a machinist and kept bees as a side thing). One day there was a swarm in the parking lot and people were freaking out because, y'know, BEES EVERYWHERE. Beekeeper guy went to his truck. Pulled a swarm-catching box out. Put it on the ground and walked away. Bees went in the box after a while. Guy put the box back in his truck and drove home with them.

You cannot prevent bees from leaving a hive they don't like the conditions of, without also preventing them from being able to make honey. The latter is dependent on them being able to come and go as they please. If they don't like their hive THEY WILL LEAVE.

Beekeeping is probably the single most non-exploitative animal agriculture in the entirety of human history. I don't know how it's even possible to exploit bees. They answer only to their queen.

[swordshapedleaves]

They absolutely do not answer to the queen. If she sucks they will kill her and make a new one.

[elliewilliams]

[gigglesister]

every time a major conflict happens in a foreign country an american teenager makes a masterpost of links or some carrd about it and then 20k people reblog it w/out actually reading any of it until someone does and points out that OP is linking to straight up open neo-nazis. how many times will this repeat before people accept that maybe this method of getting and spreading info just fucking sucks

[illegitimatetenenbaum]

King of the Hill balloon left over after my son’s birthday party. I feel like it belongs online.

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

duck

[guerrillatech]

[vanquishedvaliant]

This is definitely a plausible Hank moment, but only after a long episode of him misunderstanding and getting it ignorantly (but not maliciously) wrong at first, being distressed and confused about how he’s out of touch with the kids and gender ain’t simple like it used to be

right up until some rude asshole does this in his face and he needs to stand up for his friends / family and suddenly Understands the emotional crux of the issue

[kaijudick]

im gonna kill whoever invented waxing. shiny hairless ripped guys make me weep with boredom. i want to see hair on a mans stomach so my eyes will bug out and go awooga humina humina

[homosexualsanonymous]

*gets ratio’d at my witch trial*

[homosexualsanonymous]

[thebroodingprince-deactivated20]

Dawn dish soap ads pass that duckling around like a blunt

[highfunctioningfool]

[oniongarlic]

There is something wrong with you (said with reassuring affection)

[oniongarlic]

this post is about being disabled

[garmbreak1]

as we all know, red dragons breathe right-channel audio, white dragons breathe left-channel audio, and yellow dragons breathe video.

[darkcomedies-deactivated2022042]

love when people say “separate the art from the artist” about youtubers. what is their art? ruining LA?

[darkcomedies-deactivated2022042]

“yeah this creator who’s content is essentially selling his personality may have collaborated with white supremacists but i just really appreciate the way he sells 60 dollar hoodies to middle schoolers”