Let's say that hypothetically, this is purely hypothetical and did not occur that you get on the amtrak train and make your way to your seat and are obviously exhausted because you had to wake up early and when you get to your seat there is a fucking Canadian Goose standing there in your seat, what would you recommend that someone in that situation does
Uhhh, I don't know how to post fanfic. Here's a Hunt x Y/N smut for yall.
After a long day at work, Hunt helps you relax in the best way he knows.
It's been a long ass day. You think to yourself as you open the door to your apartment. After a day of putting out everyone else's fires all day at work, the only thing you can think about is getting inside, sitting your ass down, and finding something to eat.
The moment the door swings open, you're greeted with Hunt. At least you get to see a pretty face after a long day.
"Hey babe," He beams at you from the couch. He's got his feet up on the table and is watching tonight's sunball game.
"mm." You groan back at him- only able to muster up a sound in return. Dropping your bag next to the door, you kick off your heels and drop your jacket next to it. You know you should hang these things up and put these things in their place- but gathering the energy for that is just too much.
Hunt turns his head from the T.V and looks at you now, "Long day?"
"Mhm." You mumble back, trudging to the fridge, so you can reach in and pull out whatever alcoholic beverage you can get your hands on. Drink in hand, you walk yourself towards the couch and collapse next to Hunt, curling up at his side- practically in his lap. You go to take a sip from your drink- only to realize it's not open- which causes you to release a sad whimper. Hunt wraps his arm around you and pulls you in close, placing his hand on your thigh. With his other hand, he opens your drink. You take a sip.
After a minute of being quiet, with your head buried in his chest, while he lazily traces circles on your thighs, only lifting your face to occasionally take a sip of your drink he whispers, "Are you hungry?"
"Yes, but I don't wanna move." You mumble.
"You can stay right here then, and I'll go throw something together."
"No, that wont work either. If you move, I, in turn, move."
"Alright, alright, " He laughs. "Do we want to order something then?"
"Bingo." You say, gesturing with your drink slightly.
You both decide to order from your favorite place down the street, and get your usual. Something full of carbs and sure to put you in a food coma.
You and Hunt have completely reclined now, your couch is quite deep so you've fit yourself into a spooning position, curled up right in front of him in the safety between his arms and body. You can feel his slight excitement with your ass- but its not like you have the energy to respond to it. His hands are still brushing up and down over the little black dress you wore to work, from your hips to your rib cage while he continues to watch his sunball game, each pass getting closer and closer to the hem of your short dress.
Hunt, eyes still glued to the T.V., absentmindedly slides just the tips of his fingers under the hem of your dress. A quick jolt of excitement shoots through you. As quickly as his hands were there, they're gone again, leaving you wanting for more. To your delight, his hand rests on your thighs now, gently brushing up and down your thigh until he gets closer and closer to the hem of your dress again. Slowly, his hand makes his way further and further up your dress, sending electricity from your core, causing warmth to fill your chest.
Eventually your dress has somehow become hiked all the way up over your hip. Hunt is painstakingly, slowly, making his way to the hem of your thong now. Your exhausted mind can only focus on whatever is happening with Hunts hands, the sunball game has become just white noise as your excitement is slowly building. Finally, Hunt slides his fingers under the band of your thong where it rests on your hip, and slowly moves his hand down and between your legs- which you respond with lifting one leg and placing over the top of Hunt's to give him easier access.
Hunt finally slides one finger right between your folds, and brushes over your clit, sending a shock of pleasure and relief through you. You let loose a sigh, and Hunt obviously takes note- but quickly retreats away from where you need him and drags his hand back down your thigh. Quickly, he drags his hand back up, and gives your ass a squeeze on the way up, and slips his hand back under your panties as it was before. Repeating the same gesture, but this time spending a couple seconds longer between your legs. He repeats this move a couple more times, before keeping his fingers between your legs and giving more focused attention to your more sensitive spots. Hunt takes two fingers and slowly moves them from your entrance up to your clit, up and down, until removing his hand entirely and hooking his fingers onto your panties to pull them down.
He pulls them down right around your knees, keeping you bound by them but more open for his ministrations. He quickly goes back to work, using his two fingers lengthwise from your clit to your entrance, teasing around your opening, until finally, he barely nudges the tips of his two fingers into you.
His other hand is on your breast now, squeezing and teasing your peaked nipples, you're practically laying on your back on top of him now, and he starts to nibble on your ear lobe and neck as he slowly makes his way into you with his fingers. You can feel him hardening under you, waking you up more from your exhausted stupor- and filling your mind with only wanting this.
As Hunt is pumping his fingers in and out of you, his thumb finds his way onto your clit now, teasing the part that he knows will give you the most pleasure. You're breathing harder now and can feel yourself reaching the end. Your knees are still bound together by your panties, making it hard as you try to spread them more and invite more of him in. You start to feel yourself start to reach your limit, as your toes involuntarily curl, and you let out a moan- followed by Hunts name.
Out of breath now, Hunt kisses you along your neck and on the side of your head, and gently readjusts you back to your previous position, panties still caught around your knees, Hunt goes back to brushing his hands along your thighs- obviously not wanting to push you any further. But, now that he's put the thought in your mind, and you're caught in this lazy bliss, you're not finished with him yet. You press your ass right up to his length and move it up and down along it over his jeans. Hunt gives a pleasured grunt in return.
Reaching your hand down, you start to tease the band of his undergarments- just the way that he did. Slowly with the tips of your fingers, you drag your hand over his stomach and slide your fingers under his boxers, eventually making your way to his length under it all. Wrapping your hands around his hard cock you give him a tight grip and pump your hand up and down a couple times, while hunt goes to work unbuttoning and unzipping himself. When he's finished, you pull down his boxers and jeans just enough and line him up with your entrance, still spooning one another.
Hunt slowly drives his hard cock into you, and starts lazily fucking you from behind, causing you to release a moan. He's holding onto your breast again with one hand and has the other hand on your ass. He moves from your ass down to your pussy to tease your clit again- drawing another, more full body climax from you. When he starts to speed up a little, he pulls his hand out and gives your ass a little smack- which causes you to release yet another moan. Eventually, this position obviously isn't cutting it, Hunt pulls himself out of you and flips you over onto your back, and pulls down your panties the rest of the way to your ankles, and hiking pulling up your dress so it rests just above your breasts, squeezing them tight. Hunt removes the rest of his pants and you pull off his shirt- right before he lifts your legs onto his shoulders. Your ass is slightly lifted off the couch now, and he lines himself back up with you and drives all the way in immediately- causing you to groan in shock and pleasure. Between the orgasms, being fucked, and being so damn tired from todays bull shit- you can't tell which way is up and down, and you don't think you want to know.
Hunt dives right back into fucking you, but harder this time, using the freedom of movement to his advantage. He's driving into you all the way to the hilt now, and hitting that spot inside of you that you love so much. You're both moaning in pleasure now, until finally, hunt drives all the way into you one last time and groans, "Gods, fuck, (Y/N)!" releasing his seed into you. He kisses the insides of your thighs, and gives a couple more slow pumps inside of you, which you reply with a light moan in return- until he finally pulls out.
Gently, he removes your legs from his shoulders and places you back on the couch, you curl up and nuzzle into the cushions while you wait for him to return. After a little bit of time, he comes back with a cloth, which he uses to clean you up first, and removes your panties the rest of the way, and pulls a blanket over you- with his arms on either side of your head, he kisses you a couple times. Which you return in a sleepy and blissful manner. He walks away again to finish up whatever he's doing, and he eventually returns, and takes back his spot right up next to you on the couch.
You both lay there for a few more minutes before Hunts phone goes off letting him know the food is here- ending your night with a carb loaded dinner, you eventually fall asleep next to him on the couch while he finishes watching the rest of that sunball game.
I don't expect this one to get answered, but a friend who I recently introduced your work to asked, and I was curious:
Have you ever dabbled in writing erotica, or possibly better termed, smut? Maybe under a pseudonym?
Given the wide breadth of topics you've written about, and given that most artists of any type tend to dabble at least a little, I would guess that the answer is yes, just curious if any of it ever got published anywhere?
Thank you for your time, good sir. I've been a fan almost as long as you've been writing. Still looking for a copy of The First Four Years of the Fab Five for less than a billion dollars, and looking for a replacement for my stolen (and signed, in person, long ago) copy of Don't Panic.
There's a story called "Tastings" in Smoke and Mirrors, and a few bits of American Gods, but that's all I can think of so far.
Uhhhh what about that comic script where and angel and demon compete for a soul? Sort of Cherry-Poptart style art if i recall. I thought that was one of yours?
It was! I just went looking to see if it was on the web, and found this, and the first two pages.
Larry's memory is not quite accurate here as to who wrote what. Or at least, what he remembers is the original plan. It was meant to have been a collaboration with Kate Worley because I loved Kate and really loved the idea of collaborating and also she needed the money. And the plan was that I'd do an outline based on the plot we'd come up with and she'd write the sex, because she wrote good sex, and I would write the not-sexy bits. Kate came out to my house for an afternoon and we plotted a story, and then I went away and a couple of months later I wrote a story and sent it over to Kate, who was then meant to write the sexy stuff. Kate read what I'd written and pointed out that A) the story I had written was not at all the story we had plotted and I appeared to have gone off and plotted and written an entirely new story all on my own, and B) I hadn't actually left her anything to do, because Larry Welz was perfectly capable of filling in the blanks in terms of what the two characters were actually doing to and with each other in the story. So she didn't want her name on it or any of the money. And given that this was all friendly and straightforward, that was how we left it. (Although I felt bad because the whole plan had been that Kate would get some money.)
I still like the story. I like the wry voice in which it's told.
Hi Neil, long time fan, first time caller. I was skimming through my issues of 1602 recently and I noticed a few details of Matt Murdock's origin were very different from canon (even allowing for time differences). For example, in 1602 he doesn't lose his sight playing the hero; he eats some goo. And his Ma is around to chide him. I was wondering if you were intentional in these details or if it was just a matter of telling a very complicated story in which you couldn't pay close attention to everything.
I don't mean to be negative. Your characterization of him is still very fun, as you really lean into the Irish parts and have him being a terrible singer and it's delightful. I was just wondering. Have an amazing day!
None of the heroes and villains in 1602 have exactly the same origins or lives that they have in 1961-1964ish. That's sort of the point. Angel doesn't join the X-Men in 1963 by being rescued from the Inquisition, and wasn't the last of the original X-Men to join the team.
Dr Doom isn't injured by a machine he's built to communicate with his dead mother. And so forth.
That's kind of...not the point, though. Dr. Doom gets injured because of plot. Angel is rescued because plot. And both of those things are awesome and necessary and loadbearing elements, as were many other changes (Thor speaking in skaldic alliteration for one example.) Even putting Foggy as a ship's captain who ferries him around rather than his best friend makes sense in terms of the roving spy characterization.
The changes I picked out were not that important to the overall story. Matt is just thinking about stuff while he rides with Nat; it would have made no difference to the story plot, themes, etc if he'd lost his sight being a hero or if it was his Da who said he got into everything.
So I guess the answer is it was more *shrug* than anything else. It's still a fantastic comic.
Okay. When I was a kid I was fascinated by Matt Murdock's brother, Mike Murdock.
Who was actually Matt Murdock pretending to be his twin brother. And it seemed to me that the Mike Murdock persona was someone that Matt hadn't been, because of who he was, but had the potential of being. So when I came to write him in 1602 I wanted a Matt who had a lot more of the charm and fun of Mike Murdock. Which gave him a very different sort of origin.
Anthropology major answer: “There absolutely was such a time! Modern humans and our ancestors shared territory numerous times over prehistory with cousin species like homo neanderthalensis, homo floresiensis, and many, many others!”
Folklore student answer: “Also, almost all cultures have something like djinn, faeries, hulder, fox spirits, and other similar creatures who can appear at least human and are very, very dangerous to humans!”
Both of these things are true, and may be connected both to the above and to each other. :D
Listen I hate this take on the uncanny valley so fucking much because many subpsecies of homonids lived in the same areas but some of them got along well enough to coexist and neandertals had enough desirable genetic traits to the point where human women (see here for a blanket on female vs male choosiness) would often pass up incel homosepian for the chad neandertal.
Genetics aside, various hominid species didn’t start visually looking all that different until 50,000 years ago, while under the skin changes began as early as 89,000 years ago (ie the development of the Y chromosome but I might be oversimplifying at this point) Point being, even our non-human cousins didn’t. look. that. different. from. us. Especially comparing the diversifying of humans themselves crossing trans continental as it was. And even then neandertals still had advantagious traits for living in the Eurasian hemisphere.
Also I digress, regardless of it being intentional, and with few perserved records from that chapter in our species’ history, I don’t like the implication that the uncanny valley effect stems from humans being inherently racist (for lack of a word for hatred of non-human intelligences). I know that sounds off the wall but prejudice and sense of superiority by birthright is vastly different than othering by means of the sucess of social groups and the need to compete for territory or resources. Racism is entirely a Eurpean fabrication and it’s been proven time and time again to be a cultural outlier and purposfully designed to further the agenda of corroded theocratical religious divinity (here, here, here) and the financial benifits of the exploitation of colonism that otherwise has not been replicated by other cultures to the same degree. (this is the only example off the top of my head but I’m know there’s more.)
You know what’s older than racism?
You know what’s more flesh crawling than neandertals?
fucking rabies
You know what LOOKS like a human but doesn’t ACT human ENOUGH? Do you know what might bite you and get you sick or turn you into something that also moves about in a non human way? Brain parasites that give you painful headaches and intensifies agression and confusion.
Say you’re a monkey and one member of your troop gets bitten by something. Later he starts twitching and swaying about. He keeps stumbling out of trees but barely feels anything when he hits the ground. He won’t eat sleep or drink. He makes guttural noises that keep alerting predators and he’s in obvious writhing agony. Suddenly he’s not your friend anymore. He doesn’t recognize you and he attempts to bite and claw at anything that moves.
Up until preventitive oral medications and vaccines were developed in the 1970s there was NOTHING stopping rabies and it still prevails today and kills hundreds of thousands of people in third world countries with limited medical resources a year. There’s no cure for rabies once youve got it and the only reliable diagnostic is a brain autopsy.
Rabies. TB. Leoprosy. Syphilis. Meningitis. Toxoplasmosis. Anthrax. Mercury Poisoning. Prion disease. These are all bad and in different varying degrees can cause limps, sores, agression, confusion or dazed trances, ambled pacing, convulsions or uncharacteristic behavior in humans.
Basically everything that people are terrified of when it comes to zombies. Vampires bite. Werewolves rip people apart. Demonic possesion? Easy. Changlings take the place of your loved ones.
Also I don’t think that it’s a conicidence that the things we find uncomfortable with the uncanny valley also just happen to line up with predatory behavior, smiling too wide or staring you down, blinking too slowly or moving towards you with a slow steady speed. It’s just a danger signal to keep other monkeys in a troop from getting bitten by an infected monkey. Simple as that.
After all what’s scarier? A dead body, or moving body that will MAKE you dead?
I’m not going to be a hypocrite by pointing out racism being excused as a stemmed human behavior without claiming that the deep seated primal fear of disease doesn’t make a good excuse for ableism as well. I mean we use othering to discern friend from foe, and then at some point decided that was a good enough excuse for racism. Theres legitimate proof that ancient homonids could and would be hospitible to the disabled out of compassion. The point of having these initial fears is to guage saftey measures first, but once someone or something is proven to be harmless that normally should be the end of it. I mean if an adult wild silverback gorrilla can look at a spycam and decide it’s chill after a moment of inspection then there’s really no excuse for any of us.
Healthy othering =/= newly invented racism.
healthy fear of infectious diseases =/= excuse to hate disabled people.
But yeah rabies is more likely the reason for the uncanny valley effect thanks for coming to my goddamn ted talk.
Reblogging this version bc of sources and I personally think this makes for much more interesting (and terrifying) lore than any other post in this thread.
Honest-to-god think that the Gameboy Advance SP is the best video game console ever made. Like we should've just stopped trying after that. We should've just kept shoving more and more powerful hardware into it's guts kept and adding more buttons until you could run Doom Eternal on it. That's all we had to do and we fucked it up.
Look at this bad boy. Perfectly square. Compact. 7 buttons. Fits in your pocket. You can play Doom on it! Runs games from every Gameboy generation bc they all use the same cartridge architecture and backend!!! Tetris!!!!!! Whip it out anywhere. Built like a fucking brick. Hurl this man at a wall and it'll come out fine. Mine only broke bc the charging port rusted out bc I lost it for like four years. The peak of design. We should've just left it with this. No need to go further.
I FINALLY GOT TO USE THE ‘well i don’t trust the government’ AGAINST AN ANTI-MASKER THIS WEEKEND
i was buying wood at the camp ground and the store clerk pitched a bitch fit about not being able to understand me through the mask and then rolled her eyes and informed me we don’t have to wear those anymore bc the mandate’s already been lifted
AND THE LOOK ON HER FACE
WHEN I LOOKED HER STRAIGHT IN THE EYE
AND SAID
“oh, well I don’t trust what the government says. I’d rather make up my own mind.”
ID: tweet from @ShotgunWife with text reading “just some ideas” followed by a meme image of a generic, black mask overlayed with the following text.
keeping wearing a mask because it’s fun…
use these lines when asked “why are you wearing that?”
“it’s a free country, I ain’t no sheep, no government gonna tell me when I can wear a mask, my body my choice, it’s for religious reasons, I’m just ugly fuck off.”
The last line of text in the image reads by “now it’s our turn”.
responded to a customer with a southern accent why I still wear one with “‘Cause I look like the wrong end of a dead donkey.” using the smallest bit of a twang in my voice, and he stopped, blinked a few times, and went “A'ight. fair ‘nuff.”, nodded, and then I helped him pick out a leaf blower while he self consciously put his hand over his mouth.
