Cruelty is my Kindness

This is a Dark AU Ken Ichijouji RP blog (formerly a member of DarkDigidestined RP), but if I like/follow/reply to anything of yours and you aren't an RPer, then it's likely I'm doing it for my personal sideblog "Equals? Don't make me laugh. You are all beneath me. And soon, I will make you see why." Grief became despair Despair became rage Rage became cruelty

[thekaiserreborn]

Hi! Just came across your post, are you still out seeking rp? Would love to talk some plot!

Sure! But also, please message me off-anon for it, I’m rarely on tumblr anyways and would love to have a better idea of what you’re looking for.

[thekaiserreborn]

hey to anyone still around! or who stumbles upon this nightmare blog. 

I’d,,, really like to do some digimon rp again. To be frank, I have approximately zero desire to do so on tumblr. But I do want to do it! If anyone has platform suggestions, I’m all ears, but for now... 

Here’s some updated RP information. It’s focused on OCs because ToyHouse is a platform for that, but everything also applies to the various dark/twisted canon muses I’ve had here over the years (so, this Ken, that other even worse Ken, Izumi, maybe Ruki and Ai/Mako) 

https://toyhou.se/~bulletins/135648.sparrow-s-rp-search-

Here’s my ao3, if you’d like to get a sense of the shit I write whenever I actually update stuff there: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyOfSparrows/works

If you don’t already have my discord but you do have a twitter, please please use that as a contact point. I only check tumblr sporadically every few months. Bonus, you can see me at my most insufferable (aka when I think my shitposts are funny).

Find me here: https://twitter.com/LadyOfSparrows

personal realtalk time: 

I know covid has wrecked everyone’s year, but holy shit my year is wrecked. I’m usually at home most of the time anyways, but the few social things or special events I do are extremely important to me. My grad school residency happened over zoom, which was incredibly depressing. This really cool fantasy lit conference I’ve gone to the past few years has been postponed to Oct 2021 instead (as it should be, but a bummer). 

(oh also? I was provided a full scholarship to it this time around, for my programming proposal on redemption arcs. I was very very excited to present, and still will next year... it’s SirensCon, btw, now that I’m just rambling about shit) 

And, ha, I didn’t think it would happen, but we got cleared to go to Croatia end of the month for a few weeks to visit family and attend a cousin’s wedding. Which I was a little twitchy about, but that doesn’t matter, because some folks in my dad’s village caught the ‘rona which means no way in hell. So far, my family isn’t sick, so I’m praying they’ll at least be safe. But yeah, was just cancelled approx three days after it got confirmed. 

Plus, obviously no anime cons are happening (again, good, still sucks). All my friends live in pgh or nyc, and I’m in buttfuck nowhere CT living at home with my parents and have not had outside human affection since Feb. 

I just miss people. I’m bored out of my skull whenever I’m not frantically working on my thesis. RP has always been a place of community and friendship and joy for me, and honestly it seems some of my older, darker, edgier muses have reawakened with my plummeting mood. Not that my entire life is miserable, I’m pleased with the progress I’ve made, but isolation is hard. 

I’d love to make stories with people who care as much about this asshole as I do, canon or otherwise. AUs are my lifeblood. Apologies for this totally obnoxious whine/vent, but that’s why there’s a readmore. 

Anyways. I’m findable. If reaching out isn’t a thing you’re comfortable with but you’d maybe like to RP with me, like this post? I’ll check back more regularly for  awhile to see if anyone did. 

Again, thank you for being my place of solace when I had none some years back. I hope everyone is doing well. 

[thekaiserreborn]

briefly shows the fuck back up out of nostalgia

HEY FRIENDS. I don’t do much RP anymore, but every once in awhile I come reread old stuff on here and my other digiblogs. What do I do instead?

Well. Whoops. I kinda just started a bit of fanfic some of y’all might enjoy. It’s DaiKen, and much more canon-adjacent than this fucker ever was. I’m having fun. 

I also found out two nights ago some news that made me incredibly happy and wanted to share. 

I just passed my first term of grad school!!!

I’m currently a student in Seton Hill’s Writing Popular Fiction MFA, aka I just got my project fully approved, aka I’m writing the novel of my dreams over the next two-ish years. The first 50 pages is complete and polished. Outline is better than any I’ve ever written for any writing project. 

I still talk about digimon a ton lol, and have been considering a series of analysis essays someplace! And, my dear friend Trevor and I plan to start posting some of the work we’ve been doing on our American Digidestined storyline. So far, setting-wise it incorporates Adventure and 02, as well as Cyber Sleuth and Hacker’s Memory. It’s all OCs with unique crests and canonical digimon. 

Where can I be found, if anyone wants to catch up? A few places. Twitter is easiest: I’m @ LadyOfSparrows there. I’m also on discord, same handle which you can poke me for if you don’t already have it. My fanfic is on ao3, also LadyOfSparrows, and I have a Toyhouse account I’ll be using for that OC digiverse storyline I mentioned. That’s just LadySparrow. 

Here’s links, though:  Twitter: https://twitter.com/LadyOfSparrows  AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyOfSparrows  Toyhouse: https://toyhou.se/LadySparrow 

I’m not sure I can ever express how much digirp meant to me. I still look back on all the shit I did here fondly. I was in a dark, dark place for a good chunk of undergrad and after, too. But I’m maybe finally pulling my shit together as an adult. 

Much love to everyone who RP’d with me, chatted with me, sent me memes, liked my posts. Thank you for helping me form who I am today. 

[thekaiserreborn]

Okay so LMAO

I was just off the internet entirely for a month. And I come back to tumble and see this shitshow.

If anyone knows where I can archive entire blogs please point me there. I'm not losing all my old rps because Ken's a dickbag and I posted a gif of some dude getting whipped on the chest once.

Anyways, anyone still around, hi, I love you all, hit me up for twitter or discord. I'm taking a break from rp in general to focus on some of my own works (and cough maybe some dnd) but this place will always have a super special place in my heart.

It's been nearly five years. I finished undergrad. I'm figuring out next steps. This blog and the friends I made here got me through this far, and I couldn't be more grateful.

[magisdeterminatae-rp]

Welcome to Magis Determinatae, a brand-new, primarily Discord-based, RP server! We are inspired by the magical girl genre, but will allow all genders for this roleplay! Are you ready to unlock your potential?

If so, meet Sapphirus! A cute little gemstone creature, he’s known as a Bestower, and will unlock your latent magical power so you can fight off the evils of the human heart. He’ll even do you a favor first, and you’ll have to fight only for a short-term contracted amount of time!

Please take a look at our pages linked below. We look forward to hearing from you! 

Home || Premise || Rules || Applications || Ask || Submit 

Our Grand Opening is August 18th! Apply now!

[thekaiserreborn]

I know I like, don't. Exist much here anymore. But this is a new project I'm trying with a few friends that might ease me back to the tumblr scene! I mostly live on discord nowadays but I really love everyone who's RP'd with Ken and like, if any of you wanna try this thing with me I'd love to see you around again!

[thekaiserreborn]

Tri actually pulled it off.

I wasn't sure it could. But it did, and if what's been hinted at in the ending and on twitter is what I think it will be, I will literally never stop screaming.

I actually for real yelled once and sobbed twice during part six.

[thekaiserreborn]

((Hey guys. Here's the deal: I feel like there's no community around that I'm familiar with anymore. And I think I'm not interested in RPing on tumblr anymore. I'd really like to in like, discord servers and things, though? Mainly my dark versions and my OCs. If anybody knows of something like that already happening, let me know. Otherwise consider this a sort of archival notice, I guess. I might continue to post from time to time, relevant things or whatever, but I don't think I'm coming back to this blog full force again. Thanks for sticking around as long as you have, I'm really grateful for the people I've met here.))

[everkindhearts-blog]

SUP FOLKS welcome to my new Digimon OC multimuse featuring American Digidestined characters from my and a friend’s combined Adventure/02/Cyber Sleuth/eventually-tri timeline! So, if you want to RP with any of this crazy cast of characters, check out their bios and hit me up.

Muses include Zorana (Determination), Kenneth (Temperance), Nadine (Passion), Alexa (Charity), Erin (Justice), Hunter/Harrier, and Josie (Confidence). 

Home || Bios || Rules 

Penned by Sparrow~

[thekaiserreborn]

((So. I did a thing.

I made a multimuse for all my American Digi/destined timeline OCs. Bios aren’t up yet but likely will be pulled from the ones I have here.

Basically, I’ve been stuck in strictly literate para-style groups in another fandom for awhile. Multimuses feel more casual to me, and a way to engage in more lighthearted one-liners, memes, and crack. I’m still always up for a good paragraph thread, of course.

I am planning on making a multimuse for my former DarkDigi muses as well. I’m not getting rid of this blog or any of the old ones! Chances are I won’t even move this Ken at all, putting my other Dark!Ken on the DD multimuse.

I’ve never actually done multimuse blogs before, but I have so many blogs and I just don’t feel like maintaining so many at once anymore. I’ve been neglecting basically all of them because of that, and feel like this might be a way to finally get back into things. 

Probably won’t be quite back into things until after my thesis is done with, though.))

[thekaiserreborn]

Why I'm Never Here

((I'm in my final semester. I have a thesis project that I am struggling to complete. I am in desperate need of more professional help than I am getting, but I can't get more until after I graduate, because a degree matters more than my sanity. I recently left a very shitty toxic RP community elsewhere on tumblr. I'm burnt out all the time. I am so deprived of human contact on a regular basis that it's becoming a serious detriment to my already bad mental health. I'm desperate to stop feeling this way but there's no way to escape it right now. Frankly, I feel less stable than Ken at this point, not in a I want to cause others suffering way like he might but in a how on earth am I still miraculously breathing way. I'm not okay. I'm not okay.))

[uratanu-moving-deactivated20190]

no happy muses we put our muses through the incinerator like men

[thekaiserreborn]

((sorry I haven't gotten to those last two asks yet, first week of classes happened. Also, my internet is down again. They replaced my router Monday because it wasn't working right when I got back to Pittsburgh last weekend, and now it's fucked again, so I'm not too pleased. As always, I'm lurking on mobile.))

[musingsofsky]

    i was cruel to MYSELF     before i was cruel to ANYONE ELSE.

[thekaiserreborn]

((hey fam. got two asks left but might save them for tomorrow, stretching my Ken muscles after all this time and all that. also, just for people who don’t know, Ken was part of a DarkDigidestined group like, two to four years ago at this point. he’s not part of any recent iterations that may have popped up. right now and for the foreseeable future I intend to keep him indie. that said, if you want to RP with me, please just message and ask. if I follow you I’m up for it, and if I don’t just ask! I’ll check out your blog and see.))

[thekaiserreborn]

#24 with ken/kari

This meme here.

((I have RP’d with several Hikaris on here, an excellent light one and a wonderful certain queen of the dark ocean, but since @mygentledarkness another dear friend just decided to remake, I’ll do it with that version of her. Sorry this took so long for me to get to.))

He’d had several drinks, but was still nowhere near close enough to drunk. She was on the barstool next to him, after volunteering to get him home safely when the bar closed. 

Babysitting him to make sure he didn’t pull more shit, really. But he felt like antagonizing someone, and she was right there. “Why’d you fuckers stop me? I could’ve fixed it. I could’ve fixed him. And your Digimon, too.”

“That look in your eyes? It terrified me. You terrified me.”

He snorted at that. 

Earlier that day, after discovering that, when Leafmon came back to him once more, he had no recollection of who Ken was--well. He had, understandably, lost it. 

“I once wanted to start it all again. Do you remember that? Right before I realized it was real?”

“It’s hard to forget that moment, yeah.”

“Well some otherworldly bitch started it again. Deleted all the files from the big master computer off in the heavens somewhere and just--rebooted. But data is never truly gone. You can’t just drop that into the recycle bin and call it a day. I could have done it. I could have gotten their memory files back. I would have if you’d let me get to the fucking computer.”

“You would have died.”

Ken had to laugh. “Haven’t we covered this territory before, too? Without him--without Wormmon--you already know I deserve to die for all I’ve done, but what reason do I have to bother sticking around without him? He didn’t recognize me, for fuck’s sake!”

“You would have died without Wormmon ever knowing you at all,” she said softly. “Isn’t it better, to try to build again? Isn’t it better that he doesn’t remember all the suffering you’ve caused?”

“Shut up and take me home,” Ken said, slamming his empty glass on the counter. 

[thekaiserreborn]

“That look in your eyes? It terrified me. You terrified me.” I wonder who.

“That was never my intent, Sasaki-senpai,” Kiyoshi said, head down and gaze averted. “I was simply--" 

How on earth could he explain it? How could he explain the overwhelming, sickening feelings of rage and despair and possessiveness churning in his gut? He felt like he was about to be ill; this past him, this other him was surging so strong inside in this strange, strange place they had come to. 

The strange place that he could walk with his eyes closed. He inhaled a breath, and another and another, finally raising his eyes to meet Akira’s. “I just...” What, he just wanted to pin his senior against the bed, the wall, anywhere he could shove him and leave a trail of marks along his neck? 

But he knew he needed to address what Akira was actually talking about. “I didn’t like that room,” he said quietly. “I just wanted Aya-senpai to hurry up so we could move on. I didn’t mean to threaten her so violently.”

That room. The room where Kiyoshi, where Ken, had incinerated their bodies--those of Kouji and Izumi, those of the very Akira and Aya who were standing with him here now, younger than the other him remembered them.

He shook it off. “Let’s go. There’s...somewhere here I think I want to visit. I don’t know why, but please, just follow me.”

[thekaiserreborn]

🐬

This meme here.

He had already killed three handlers. He was sharp and beautiful as a gilded thorn, luring the landwalkers in with close-lipped smiles and hypnotic eyes. He would hum, and in they would lean--and in he would drag them, teeth deadly pointed dragging at the flesh of their throats. 

Ken knew he was a marvel to them. That was no surprise--his kind had been thought myth for many centuries prior to the last several years. But they didn’t know the caliber of merperson they’d managed to lay their pathetic dry hands on. 

He was Emperor of the Sea of Japan. He had won that title through sheer ruthlessness. When the humans dared disturb his depths, of course he was going to tear them to shreds. 

What he hadn’t been expecting was a newly-developed net that his inborn weapons were no use against. He’d been warned by advisors that he was reckless, but his actions hadn’t failed him...until now. 

Someone was at the side of his tank again. Ken swam closer, sinuous and threatening as could be. His hair drifting about his face as he stopped, he gazed at her for a long moment before baring his teeth in a vicious smile. 

He’d yet to speak to any of them. He really had no desire to. It amused him to think they had no idea what they were dealing with.