lovely

hey i'm rachel and I write bad poetry

[sapphicsonnets]

god is a girl

god is a girl you

call at three am

tears shining eyes puffy narrowed she has

a peach-cropped-turtleneck on

god is a girl in

a parking lot in january pitch black afternoons she

holds the keys to her warm car she won’t get in

god is a girl with eyes colored poison ivy green

ringed in red hair faded red god is a girl sobbing

drunk in her basement she calls you at three am

come get me i’m home i can’t be here anymore

she forgot you couldn’t drive yet but you would have rather died

then not be there for her when she needed you

god is a girl who says sorry instead of telling you what’s wrong

whose heart beats too fast for far too long

god is a girl who holds her keys between her knuckles and

god is a girl at three am in

little glen with the perseids overhead you can

see the milky way up here toes swirl in the summer lake

on the dock 

god is a girl you find dripping

anger in the dark who you drag

into the daylight and let her scream

i’m not a boyfriend-fucking whore

god is a girl you want to kiss

[thingsmustpass]

“i want you. and i don’t just mean physical. i want you when you’re bursting with happiness and i want you when you feel so sad you can’t get out of bed. i want you when it pours down with rain and i want you when the sun decides to come out. i want to know who means the world to you, who inspires you, who you never want to speak to again. i want to learn about past events and i want to create new experiences together. i want to understand how you think and how you feel. i want so much to be there to love you when you need me and want you to know i’ll be here no matter what when you don’t. i want you to know that even through rocky times, i’ll always be here wanting you.”

— i just want you to want me too.

[incendavery]

parting is such sweet sorrow

[sunsoakedthoughts]

“Your smile is like waking up at 5 am on a summer camp morning, creeping out of the cabin and sitting outside in the gentle morning light, bare feet in the dew covered grass and a cool breeze sending a shiver down my soul. Your voice is like the gentle crash of lake water against the shore, birds chirping and leaves swaying in the lethargic wind. There are sunbeams in your eyes, heating up my bare arms as I lay in the grass. There is saltwater in your laugh, cleansing and sparkling and stinging. Watching you is like watching the earth awaken, early in the morning when the horizon is foggy and the air is still cold. And maybe you’re used to “I’m not a morning person”, to sleeping in and grumbling at the alarm clock and not smiling until a gallon of coffee has been consumed. But darling, the sunrise is always beautiful, no matter who is awake to notice.”

— a love letter to nobody // c.r.h.

[lunchboxpoems]

NICOLE SEALEY

[teenagecrush]

[artyprose-deactivated20200707]

From the massive crowd

I searched for the only face

that makes my pulse loud

— ƶҽղ 🕸 Haiku series

[teacup13-deactivated20200319]

Aries: If I wish for anything, I would wish to be whatever you wish for. Taurus: I am still sad, tired, and in love with you. Gemini: I know you’ve been staring at the walls, waiting for your voice to see some space to sleep, but these pockets only follow the wind when the rain can’t find your steps. Cancer: Will you take my hand and trust we will end up where we need to be? Leo: Some days it’s like I’m walking around in a fog only I can see, other days my feet only point in yesterday’s I’m trying to forget. Virgo: & maybe every sunset I have ever seen has saved my life. Libra: Darling, it’s okay to not like yourself, but that doesn’t mean you deserve to get hurt by the people you love. Scorpio: We’ve been talking about forever like we can keep the leaves from one day falling, but with you, I want right now. today. this moment and every moment in between. I want to be the memories that fill your cheeks. Sagittarius: I never wanted to be the thing that hurt to remember. Capricorn: I don’t ache for you anymore, so why do I still choke on your name? Aquarius: I want to lay next to you in silence. I want to know which breaths make you afraid of your own heart, which knee holds your lips closer than a promise, which ocean you’re still unraveling your veins into. Pisces: Loving you is the only thing I got right.

(via teacup13)

[poetry]

andalusian love poem, #1

your absence piles into me: a cotton sheet along my back. in the afternoon, I will declare myself lonely (to myself), at night I will sit and write poems to you and re-enact your hair.

[thepastelfog]

I read old poetry

And my bones ache

From how happy

I thought you would make me

[thelovejournals]

I never wanted a quiet, sensible sort of love. I wanted to be devoured.

Beau Taplin, “The Devouring” (via thelovejournals)

[thelovejournals]

Know that I loved you. Know that it was not enough.

Leigh Bardugo, Ruin and Rising (via thelovejournals)

[thepastelfog]

The Road To Recovery

The road to recovery

is as long

as winding

as dark

as lonely

as it is inevitable

friends and parents say

“it waits, just walk it”

no

it looms

it calls out to me

“I am here for those who mind the stop signs”

and I kick, and I scream, and I curse into the bitter wind the unfairness of it all

and I run one more red light

fall back into this monochromatic silence

where indifferent spirits live

making my head heavy and my bedroom cold

I drag my feet and stubbornly

begin the walk again

because there is nowhere else to go

the road calls

“I am here for those who mind the speed limit”

but stupid me, impatient me

I don’t listen

I shout in defiance

“you are not my keeper”

and I fly through the twists and turns

like a demon fleeing hell

because that’s exactly what I am

I land back in frigid, grey captivity

with blisters on my feet

I look around me and I know that I can’t live here

so once again

I go to the road

shadow trees breathe

freeze tears as they fall

I cry out against the wind

“what do I have to do?”

I feel the universe considering me

tilting its head in contemplation

“I am here for those who mind the wishes of their heart and not their head”

the wind stops

it is colder now

too cold to breathe or cry

I turn around

look back at where I came from

there is no happiness here

I look ahead

the road looms

and I can already see the stop signs

but is a road, not a bedroom

so I will walk it to the end

[thelovejournals]

And her I love you’s sounds a hell of a lot like you can always come home.

Michelle K., And How I Want To (via thelovejournals)

[pinktwenk]

I’m a lover without a lover. I’m lovely and I’m lonely. I belong deeply to myself.

Warsan Shire, excerpt from 34 Excuses for Why We Failed at Love (via honeybeehart)

[thepastelfog]

I have this dream Once or twice a month A trick of the light put on by my midnight cravings: A mattress on the floor In an apartment meant for dreamers I am awake You are asleep Your arms, Around my waist Clinging like the rising and falling of my chest Is keeping you alive You are keeping me alive Head on chest Heart to cheek Can you hear how it beats for you? There’s not a synonym or simile That can capture how this feels We are incredibly, Undoubtedly In love There is silence No violence It is dark It is cold out The window is open And the night jobs are going home It smells like– Winter It smells like– Sleep It smells like– The memory of blown out candles That we bought together At a store meant for people like us People, Young And broke And stupid enough To by candles When we are sleeping on the floor I lay very still And watch you sleep I wonder if you’re dreaming I wonder what about I wonder if it’s a nightmare And I remember That your soul And my soul Are all tangled up Just how your legs And my legs Are tangled as well If you had a nightmare I’d feel the pain And in this moment That makes sense Because we are in love I remember That we are in love I close my eyes and I think How lucky I am

[littlegirlabused]