I Only Love My Cat

grace / usa / 19

[stoney-baloney-with-cheese]

Do not let them erase this. Do not let them tell you he meant "my heart goes out for you."

This man is the grandson of a Canadian Nazi sympathizer who moved to South Africa BECAUSE he thought the apartheid was just the coolest.

He has a gaggle of kids specifically because he believes his genes are superior and need to be spread to improve humanity.

He has thrown his support behind the neonazi party in Germany and the far right party in the UK, not to mention how far he's wormed up the ass of the Republican party.

He threw two sieg heil salutes back to back at the inauguration of the president of the United States and is trying to scrub the evidence off the internet.

Elon Reeve Musk is a fucking Nazi.

[arctic-hands]

[Image Description: gif of Elon Musk at a podium at the twenty twenty-five presidential inauguration, placing his right hand on his heart then raising his right arm into a Nazi salute, then turning around and repeating the gesture to whatever is behind him. End I.D]

[there-goes-trouble]

The World According to Elon Musk’s Grandfather

What happened to antisemitic rants before social media.

[metalbatteryzone]

Being in a mid-2000s High School Health class and they show you this on DVD

[furlockhound-inactive-moved-dea]

Didn’t that turn out to be a load of bullshit that no-one can replicate the results of to this day?

[theswedishelf]

Yep! His results were faked, and the entire film was basically anti-McDonald’s scaremongering, “poor people are stupid” and “fat people don’t get any sex”. It’s also thanks to this asshat that McDonald’s can’t advertise fuckin’ Happy Meals anymore and had to get rid of all their characters and their super size option, particularly because he claimed without evidence that they have a kid-fattening agenda, don’t list their nutritional info anywhere and have a mission statement from their CEO to make people sick and unhealthy from eating there for every single meal. On top of this, he actually tried to claim in a bonus experiment that McDonald’s fries aren’t actually fries because they don’t rot when left in an airtight container for a long time but all the burgers do–which is thanks to the oil and salt they’re loaded with, not some big conspiracy where the fries, which are processed and supplied by McCain in Canada, aren’t actually goddamn chopped potatoes–and equated the containers to a human stomach. Yes, cause the human stomach is an airtight container that food sits in for months, right? Spurlock, did veganism turn your brain completely off or something? Hell, the fucker even tried to claim credit for McDonald’s having salads, falsely stating at one point they didn’t have any before he “exposed” their EVIL PLANS.

Yeah, that’s another thing to remember, he’s apparently a vegan. He didn’t let anyone know he’s one, of course, he only mentioned his girlfriend is one, because it would’ve made his vomiting after a single McDonald’s meal, something literally no one else on the planet has done, seem less ZOMG SCARY.

Want a good film of this nature? Try Tom Naughton’s Fat Head instead, a film where a guy actively proves Spurlock wrong by actually losing weight while eating nothing but fast food for a month. He accomplishes this by NOT fucking gorging himself on the unhealthiest food choices, eating more meals than he claims or cutting out his usual physical activity. While he’s at it, he also exposes exactly why Spurlock is a total fraud. In the process, he gets actual doctors and nutrition experts to help him explain why everything you know about healthy eating is probably wrong or half-true, inform us about good and bad cholesterol, expose the real reasons behind the so-called “obesity epidemic” and point out why fat =/= unhealthy by default. Yeah, Naughton encourages viewers to try the paleo diet in the end, but at least it comes off more as a suggestion and doesn’t demonize anyone in the process.

[yungtarkatan-deactivated2018110]

Wow, everything I know is now a lie.

[picketsmodblog-deactivated20181]

Also, to elaborate on this, Spurlock claimed that he was eating 5,000 calories a day, and yet when a Swedish university tried this very experiment with several different students, no one (I repeat, no one) could even come close to replicating the results.

So yeah, Spurlock basically lied to prove a point, who would have guessed

[rasec-wizzlbang-blog]

he was also apparently vegan for years before doing this, so of course his body would have a bad reaction to all that red meat.

[luna-and-mars]

brooklyn nine-nine + text posts [14/?]: the story of Jake and Amy

bonus:

[rhythmofsnow]

Season One

Charles: Jake, do you like Amy?

Jake:

Season Six

Anyone: *breathes in Amy’s direction*

Jake:

[latinposeidon]

Brooklyn nine nine immediately making more explicit jokes the second they got on NBC is the biggest dick energy I’ve ever seen

[crackearphanatic]

Brooklyn Nine Nine immediately getting more ratings the second they got in NBC is the brightest dick energy I’ve ever seen

[keybladesoras]

We saved our honeymoon!

[404usernamefound]

I forgot they were all excited to be able to curse and then I got slapped in the face by this.

[montygreen]

#America’s Dream Couple

[bananabellina]

you know what I love about this scene? Jake reflexively smiles at Amy saying I love you because he loves her, but he’s still reeling from what he’s learned. he’s NOT expecting kudos for being a good male feminist. his awkward smile acknowledges that his wife is in pain and there’s only so much he can do to help her.

[pragmatismandmagic]

Daniel Howell: I will have the most iconic coming out video of Pride Month 2019.

Eugene Lee Yang: Hold my beer.

Daniel Howell: I absolutely will because sharing our experiences is difficult and what we are both doing is brave and has a huge impact on the young queer people who look up to us so we are definitely not in competition also this is a lot of beer.

[those-goddamn-bats]

yes! this isn’t a competition! both of them were so incredibly brave for coming out to an audience of millions of people, after being in the closet for nearly their whole lives. they came out in ways they felt was best and most comfortable for them and if you’re going to compare the two, you’re being insensitive. we aren’t going to be pitted against each other, especially not during Pride month.

[there-is-still-some-liquor-left]

shakespeare woke up everyday and he said “well. time to write another role for david tennant.”

[imaydetest]

I mean, he met him a couple of times. He knows what he’s like

[lesbianredpanda]

Paid parking at hospitals is extortion and should be illegal

[fleetwood-mac-andcheese]

Counterpoint: Most things hospitals charge for are extortion and should be illegal

[broken-horn-of-equius]

Counter-counterpoint: the privatization of medical care is at or near the pinacle of extortion and should be illegal.

[americas-sass]

How to Write a Michael Schur Lead Romance

Partner 1: Confident, Fun, Slightly Depressed, Probably Has Undiagnosed ADHD

Partner 2: Anxiety™ 

Partner 1 provides the light atmosphere, Partner 2 provides the level head. Congrats, you have the perfect lead couple.

BONUS:

How to Write a Michael Schur Secondary Romance: Abnormal Dork Meets Equally Abnormal Dork

[bartonclinton]

Sansa + inspiring others to fight with her 🐺

If I am ever a queen, I’ll make them  l o v e  me.

[elliot-olivia]

[kisskissfuckshitup]

kids are fuckin wild dude,,,

i walked out of my apartment this morning and a five year old kid was playing outside and immediately he pointed at my aparment and was like “some chinese people used to live there. now someone else does”

and i was like… you mean that one? and pointed at my apartment, the one i literally just walked out of

and he was like “yeah”

and i was like……….. yeah…

[kisskissfuckshitup]

the other day I was coming back from work and as I’m walking up to my apartment, he runs up to me with two fistfuls of grass and yells DON’T STEP ON THIS GRASS IT’S FOR THE BUNNIES and drops it in the middle of the sidewalk and i’m just like okay!! :D

[kisskissfuckshitup]

this morning I left for work and I heard a tapping noise, so I looked up and he was in the second floor window waving goodbye

[kisskissfuckshitup]

today I was walking to my door and he ran up to me and yelled DID YOU KNOW SOMEONE IS COMING and i was like WHOA NO WHO’S COMING

and he tells the girl beside him YOU TELL HIM so she tells me “there’s a guide coming! and he’s invisible!” and ofc i’m like WHOA THAT’S SO COOL and the boy tells me that he’s arriving by helicopter. and the helicopter is also invisible and you can’t hear it either! so I ask why he’s coming and they tell me it’s because it’s his birthday and he’ll be here at exactly 6:00

they’re gonna ring my doorbell at 6 so I can tell the invisible man in the invisible helicopter happy birthday before he flies away

[kisskissfuckshitup]

so i said happy birthday to him and they showed me his invisible helicopter and then informed me that I misheard them and that the invisible man was, in fact, God

[kisskissfuckshitup]

okay so TODAY i came home from work and he came up to me and was like “i rang your doorbell earlier” and so I told him I wasn’t home and asked what he needed me for and he was like

“i had a question”

so I was like alright what was your question

and he goes “do you have a kitchen?” and I was like… uhh yeah I’ve got a kitchen

and he was like okay and walked away

[incorrectmerlinquotes]

Arthur: Maybe my father was wrong. Maybe sorcery isn’t all evil. Don’t you have anything to say about magic, Merlin?

Merlin:

[scarletxwinter]

RDJ, on passing the torch to the new Avengers: I think we can all agree that even though it’s the end for us, our legacy will live on.

Evans: This…this is a family and it’s hard to let that go, but we know that the MCU is in good hands of new heroes, even the ones we’re passing the torch to.

Hemsworth: We’re all grateful for what Marvel has held for us many years, as well as our characters play. I just can’t wait to see new ones coming in and following in our footsteps.

Mark: We’re leaving knowing that Marvel is in good hands.

Scarlett: Knowing they’ll mature on, and give new meaning of hope to the fans.

Jeremy: The new heroes got this under control. No doubt.

*Meanwhile*

Anthony: Sebastian, do you hear a squeak sound? I think there’s a mouse in here

Sebastian: No? What mouse?

Anthony, Screams and points: Ah! There it is!

*Points to Tom*

Holland: Honestly, fuck you guys.

[ernmark]

When I was in college, I wrote a paper on the real life applications of zombies.

Whether you love them or you’re sick of them, zombies as a pop cultural milestone are incredibly useful when it comes to disaster preparation. Organizations like the CDC and FEMA will run drills to train their staff using “zombie outbreak” scenarios. Parents of young children are encouraged to frame home disaster plans in terms of zombie attacks, because zombies are a fun Halloween thing, rather than something as real and scary as a tornado or a house fire.

But I notice it in other parts of my life.

I was looking into a setup for making my own rope, because reasons. When I was asked why I would even care about how to do something like that, I didn’t have to explain that it’s a neat skill to have and I like the idea of being a little more reliant on myself and a little less reliant on Target. I said “in case of zombies,” and the other person nodded like I’d said something perfectly reasonable.

Same goes when I’m making arguments for why I’d rather know how to repair my own clothes than buy new ones. I could talk about ecological waste and sweatshop labor and all that stuff, or I could say “yeah, but when the zombies come, I won’t be the one with holes in my socks.”

And yes, the person on the other side probably already knows a lot of that other stuff without me reiterating it for the thousandth time, but also, constantly talking about all the ways the world sucks is really not doing my mental health any favors. Sometimes it’s better to take a step back and pretend the scariest things we’re facing are a bunch of movie monsters that can be outpaced with a brisk walk.

[hyperactivehedgehog]

You know what? This is actually really good advice.

I’m a broke student living on the 8th floor of a student housing place and I don’t know how often I wasn’t able to buy groceries because the elevator was broken. Or how often we didn’t have flowing water for a few hours, or I couldn’t wash my clothes because I didn’t have the change for the laundromat.

And a lot of times when there is one of those situations, I realise that I’m not completely prepared for that, because you never remember to prepare for everything. I’m not gonna go: i need to stack up on candles in case of a blackout. I need basic non-perishable food items so I can make easy meals if I’ve run out of money or don’t have the time/energy to go shopping. I need hand washing detergent in case I can’t use the laundromat for whatever reason. I need cash for when I can’t go to the atm. But the ‘zombie scenario’ includes all of that. A stack of water bottles? - Zombies. No-heat food stuff? - Zombies. Flashlight? - Zombies. Med kid? - Zombies. Extra batteries? - Zombies. Enough medicine for 3 days? - Zombies.

“Could I survive, alone, for 3-5 days in case of zombies?” is a pretty good question to prepare for emergencies but also to make sure there is something to fall back on in case you hit a rough patch (whether it’s a depressive episode, running out of money or just having a very stressful week).

I know that’s not what you were talking about, but I find it really helpful.

(I would also very much like to read your essay on the use of zombie)

[ernmark]

This is exactly what I was talking about– I think you articulated it a whole lot better than I did.

I’m really glad you found it helpful!

[eudoxiav]

P sure the cdc makes a zombie preparedness guide because no one was actually following their national disaster guide (which is exactly the same guide).

[ernmark]

It literally does.

A few people have been asking about the essay– sorry, folks, but that was lost to oblivion years ago.