Random stuff

[badjokesbyjeff]

What’s the difference between a shitty golfer and a shitty skydiver?

The shitty golfer goes, -WHAM!- “FUCK!”

The shitty skydiver goes, “FUCK!” -WHAM!-

[fhawne-deactivated20221006]

so january is almost over huh? what’s next? february? give me a break

[nerdyvocals]

Damn. The years start coming and they really don’t stop coming, huh?

[thereallill]

@nerdyvocals stop noo

[nega-spark]

[carldangerous]

This really cool and then I turned the sound on and now I am… unsettled

[badjokesbyjeff]

A Russian cop wants to get a breathalyzer.

A Russian cop wants to get a breathalyzer like the Western cops have to deal with drunk drivers. He asks his superior for one and his superior says “Sorry comrade. We have no money.”

The cop decides to go to a local black market where he buys a condom.

He stops the first driver and says, “Official government breathalyzer test. Blow.”

The driver blows into a condom and the cop notices it smells like vodka. He says, “You drunk. Go to Police Station.”

He stops the second driver and says, “Official government breathalyzer test. Blow.”

The driver blows into a condom and the cop notices it smells like vodka. He says, “You drunk. Go to Police Station.”

He stops the third driver and says, “Official government breathalyzer test. Blow.”

The driver says, “You crazy? That is a condom!”

The cop says, “You not drunk. You free to go.”

[badjokesbyjeff]

See? To prove I’m not some boring house dad I went and got a tattoo!

Her: Oh, cool! It’s.. uh?

Me: (proudly) It’s my thermos! From work!

Her: (reaching towards me) Well, uh, the line work is certainly..

Me: (slaps hand away) Don’t touch the thermos tat.

[thereallill]

JEFF

[catchymemes]

[link-the-feral-anon]

When you remember the anti-vax movement

[burger-prince]

[catchymemes]

[nudityandnerdery]

Make it a good one, kids.

[aru]

Tumblr Code.

[geekishchic]

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces”

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.

always reblog tumblr identification

[taejiminie95]

SHDJDKSK ITS BACK

[theauspolchronicles]

I’ve been on this site for so long I remember a time before this post existed…

[izzyhill]

[camiekahle-deactivated20190815]

THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN

[macncheese-blog]

I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS FOR SEVEN YEARS

DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????

[pinkifingers]

That last fatal scream tho

[flawlessputaa-deactivated201610]

THE TERROR IN HIS SCREAM OH GOSH

[piss-pirate]

[chillyfeetsteak]

i’m crying

[smore-692-deactivated20170712]

WAAA-

[veritashopian]

I will always reblog this on the off chance some other poor soul has been searching for it

[molten-by-determination-deactiv]

IT’S BACK

[llibratin-deactivated20170617]

HOYL SHIT ITS B A CK

[not-a-recommended-url]

IT’S BACK?? ON MY DASH?

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

RIP

[sunshinehp15]

I’VE ONLY SEEN IT IN COMPLATIONS

[the-v-gees]

The biggest mood

[softwaredesconocido-deactivated]

Her only happy moment 

[johannas-motivational-insults]

SPOP x Cards Against Humanity [1/?]

[victoriel-translations]

Test your colour vision

[obscene-queen]

IM A FUCKING MOLE

[obscene-queen]

i tried again and got dog HOW AM I AN ART KID

[nerdyvocals]

Cat without my glasses, hawk with them

[thereallill]

I got Robot.

[horde-princess]

aimee carrero’s laugh is the best sound in the world change my mind

[cactihaveflowerstoo]

[just-a-space-gay]

New Ask Game! What Pokemon Type/Type Duo Do You Think I Am!

[basiliskfree]

Today’s problem

what do chairs for dragons look like.

[carbisari]

big comfy piles of pillows

[basiliskfree]

Well, that don’t work in the scene I’m doing it’s too cute not to draw.

[carbisari]

DAWWW SO CUTE :>

[noivern]

they use human chairs but really badly

[rareandradiant-maiden]

same

[citrus-adventures]

Wait elongated chairs y’all. Eight chair legs instead of one, they can lie down majestically and put their chins on the table like they were always meant to.

@basiliskfree

[basiliskfree]

I’m not sure if this is silly or a good idea lol

[noivern]

it’s not polite!

[thatll-do]

you’re a dragon manners mean jackshit nothing

[daedricsheep]

excuse you dragons are pillars of nobility and composure

[thatll-do]

you’re a dragon. who’s gonna stop you? hmm? the dragon politeness upkeep taskforce?

[daedricsheep]

I mean other dragons are really the only thing a dragon fears

[dateadragonsuggestion]

Date a dragon who uses big comfy piles of pillows as chairs 

Date a dragon who tries to use chairs for humans but has trouble 

Date a dragon who uses elongated chairs made just for dragons 

Date a dragon who is a pillar of nobility and composure 

Date a dragon who rests their chin on the table 

[hornyreptiles]

I love this post way too much not to reblog it.

[blaze-dargun]

AaaaAAAAAAAAAA

The cutest damn things Ive ever seen

[communistchexmix]

@basiliskfree @noivern a solution: giant beanbag chairs

[basiliskfree]

Draw that in a separate post also these

[dovewithscales]

I just lay on the floor. Maybe with something soft under me.

[kyrothedragon]

Just… Idk Try

[digitaldraik]

If I don’t reblog the dragon chair post, assume I’m dead.

[iwantthatdickgrayson]

Wow

[divagonzo]

[vestiges-of-light]