A Tiding of Magpies @thesecretvalley - Tumblr Blog

insomniac-arrest

there are two wolves inside you

writing-prompt-s

The struggle is real.

robin-the-robo

And then I do neither of those things!

writing-prompt-s

This. This is the real struggle.

date-a-jew-suggestions

If you would report an undocumented immigrant to ICE you would have reported me to the Nazis and I don’t fucking trust you

prismatic-bell

A note:

I live in a state where you “have to” report anyone you suspect of being undocumented (that wonderful hellhole of Arizona). Now in practice this law has fallen far short, thank goodness. But if you live in such a place and they start enforcing it, here is how you get around it:

Assume everyone who doesn’t speak English is visiting.

Never ask about their job, because if they tell you they work here then you know they’re not visiting. You see them a lot for several weeks or months? Hm. Someone in the family must be ill. That’s terribly tough. They always dress in old, ratty laborers’ clothes? I feel you, my dude, I can’t afford new clothes either, and my dad has the fashion sense of an aardvark, so sometimes it’s not even about “affording” them. They say they’ve been here for years? You must have misunderstood. Spanish isn’t your first language, after all. First and last name? It never came up, or you don’t recall–you meet a lot of people.

And then, if you’re asked: no, you haven’t seen anyone residing illegally in the United States. Just people visiting.

date-a-jew-suggestions

Very good very important addition

appropriately-inappropriate

Essentially, this is the civil society version of a work-to-rule strike.

Don’t do more than is expressly asked of you, and do what you are asked with such an intense attention to protocol that not asking you at all becomes more effective than even bothering.

In this case:

“Have you seen an illegal immigrant?”

“Could you describe an illegal immigrant, officer?”

*officer describes a person who is in the country without appropriate paperwork, or who has crossed the border illegally*

“No, sir, I haven’t seen any illegal immigrant.”

And this is correct. You have NOT seen an illegal immigrant, because you have no way of knowing if Jose Fulano is here legally or not. And since you can’t see his paperwork (or lack thereof), and did not personally see him cross the border illegally, you are only answering precisely the question asked.

dancingwiththelostboys

I’m not American, and I have like, three followers, but this is important.

thelawfulchaotic

So, I’m a lawyer, who deals with immigration though does not specialize in it. But here’s the thing(s):

1) Even someone who’s working could be here on a migrant (or other sort of) visa (hey, there are a few thousand per year, and *someone*’s got to get them, right?) or could be waiting for their case to resolve in immigration court, after having come to America to join a born or naturalized American family member.

2) Even people who are working improperly could have come into the country legally – and just overstayed their visa or be violating the conditions of their visa, and you have no idea what the niggly little regulations that govern that might be.

3) If a law enforcement officer asks you about a neighbor/friend/etc., take this moment to remind them that, unlike them, you cannot ask a random person off the street for their ID and be entitled to a response.

4) Even if someone has told you that they are undocumented, you still don’t know, do you? Humans lie all the time. How could you know for sure? You can’t, because they can’t prove that they have a lack of papers. Just because you haven’t seen papers doesn’t mean they don’t exist!

5) Don’t ever talk to cops in general. Why are you talking to a cop? Stop that, as soon as it is safe and feasible.

Love,

a very tired public defender

date-a-jew-suggestions

If you would report an undocumented immigrant to ICE you would have reported me to the Nazis and I don’t fucking trust you

prismatic-bell

A note:

I live in a state where you “have to” report anyone you suspect of being undocumented (that wonderful hellhole of Arizona). Now in practice this law has fallen far short, thank goodness. But if you live in such a place and they start enforcing it, here is how you get around it:

Assume everyone who doesn’t speak English is visiting.

Never ask about their job, because if they tell you they work here then you know they’re not visiting. You see them a lot for several weeks or months? Hm. Someone in the family must be ill. That’s terribly tough. They always dress in old, ratty laborers’ clothes? I feel you, my dude, I can’t afford new clothes either, and my dad has the fashion sense of an aardvark, so sometimes it’s not even about “affording” them. They say they’ve been here for years? You must have misunderstood. Spanish isn’t your first language, after all. First and last name? It never came up, or you don’t recall–you meet a lot of people.

And then, if you’re asked: no, you haven’t seen anyone residing illegally in the United States. Just people visiting.

date-a-jew-suggestions

Very good very important addition

appropriately-inappropriate

Essentially, this is the civil society version of a work-to-rule strike.

Don’t do more than is expressly asked of you, and do what you are asked with such an intense attention to protocol that not asking you at all becomes more effective than even bothering.

In this case:

“Have you seen an illegal immigrant?”

“Could you describe an illegal immigrant, officer?”

*officer describes a person who is in the country without appropriate paperwork, or who has crossed the border illegally*

“No, sir, I haven’t seen any illegal immigrant.”

And this is correct. You have NOT seen an illegal immigrant, because you have no way of knowing if Jose Fulano is here legally or not. And since you can’t see his paperwork (or lack thereof), and did not personally see him cross the border illegally, you are only answering precisely the question asked.

dancingwiththelostboys

I’m not American, and I have like, three followers, but this is important.

thelawfulchaotic

So, I’m a lawyer, who deals with immigration though does not specialize in it. But here’s the thing(s):

1) Even someone who’s working could be here on a migrant (or other sort of) visa (hey, there are a few thousand per year, and *someone*’s got to get them, right?) or could be waiting for their case to resolve in immigration court, after having come to America to join a born or naturalized American family member.

2) Even people who are working improperly could have come into the country legally – and just overstayed their visa or be violating the conditions of their visa, and you have no idea what the niggly little regulations that govern that might be.

3) If a law enforcement officer asks you about a neighbor/friend/etc., take this moment to remind them that, unlike them, you cannot ask a random person off the street for their ID and be entitled to a response.

4) Even if someone has told you that they are undocumented, you still don’t know, do you? Humans lie all the time. How could you know for sure? You can’t, because they can’t prove that they have a lack of papers. Just because you haven’t seen papers doesn’t mean they don’t exist!

5) Don’t ever talk to cops in general. Why are you talking to a cop? Stop that, as soon as it is safe and feasible.

Love,

a very tired public defender

me blogging

boycurio

snorting while laughing is the purest sound and it’s not weird or gross

dangerously-human

Thank you for this very wholesome positivity

yupthatexists

captcreate-deactivated20251226

How bout’ y'all learn how to drive?

iammyfather

Black Ice don’t care how well you learned to drive.

technogenic-mess

Is this shit for real? Somebody comes up with an innovative way to try and keep people from dying in car accidents, and some chud just HAS to crawl out of the woodwork to complain about it?

progressivemillennial

zelaznyharper

Gardening is a Crowley thing. The only thing Crowley devotes any personal attention to in his apartment is his lush garden which he demands meet his exacting standards.

When Crowley and Aziraphale have to spend years in each others back pockets raising Warlock Dowling, Aziraphale chooses to disguise himself as …the gardener. You can’t tell me Aziraphale didn’t spend half his time trolling Nanny Crowley with his ‘kind-hearted’ and ineffective gardening techniques.

I can’t help but picture Crowley, dressed as Nanny Ashtoreth, in the garden, at 2 in the morning, viciously doing some damage-control ‘gardening.’

“Just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing” indeed.

miscriont

Okay but no, I’m suddenly OVERWHELMINGLY entertained by the idea of Aziraphale being nicer to plants than Crowley is, while also being UTTERLY INCOMPETENT as an actual gardener/horticulturitst/botanist. And him and Crowley getting into nightly arguments after Warlock has gone to bed like

Crowley: Praise! And Comfort! Are NOT SUBSTITUTES! FOR OPTIMAL NITROGEN LEVELS IN THE SOIL!!!!

Aziraphale: but crowley that orchid was positively in tears after you were finished berating it–

Crowley: SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE DID

gleefully-macabre

I mean, he did tell Warlock that slugs and snails, two common garden PESTS, should be respected and cared for.

Catch Nanny on the lawn with a 10lb bag of salt, strongly disagreeing.

ineffabilum

“Well, I was caretaker of the first Garden ever created—“

“You were a guard!”

purrsevere

smooth

cringepics

how do people get in relationships like how does that even happen how do u get the universe to align in ur favour like that

prokopetz

A female dragonborn paladin with the noble background is the ultimate switch: she can be the knight, the princess or the dragon, as circumstances require.

grazztthedark

I’m imagining a scenario where, through a series of misunderstandings, she’s hired to rescue herself from herself.

rabidpeep

Priest: “Sir Aldes of Mosley, the church has evidence to suggest that the Princess Miranda of Foxley has been kidnapped by Firefang the Ruthless. Will you rescue her on behalf of His Holiness?”

Sir Miranda Aldes, born in Foxley, honorarily knighted in Mosley as a Black Knight after winning a jousting tournament, who’s rebellious teenage nickname was Firefang: “So, about all that…”