World Fucking Champions

Sometimes it's the very people who no one imagines anything of who do the things that no one can imagine

[theboyfriendstagram]

[glumshoe]

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy.

I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.

[reblogging-dragon]

Showed my Geologist dad a picture of the obsidian knife you had and he nearly said this exact thing word for word. I can't believe my own father would fall prey to this. Clearly you know thine enemy

[glumshoe]

I work too closely with geologists not to have a contingency plan for eliminating them.

[zaptap]

[holographicfatpikachu]

governments asleep post fat pikachu

[holographicfatpikachu]

ROUND 2

[politijohn]

When we begin eating the rich, Bernie says start with Elon Musk

[quasi-normalcy]

Elon Musk looks like he would taste terrible.

[officialunitedstates]

I don’t care who santa thinks he is.  if he flies over u.s. air space without a documented flight plan and sufficient clearance he WILL BE SHOT DOWN.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[weenie-hut-general]

[silver-tongues-blog]

Guys i have a great idea

[silver-tongues-blog]

[rosexknight]

A platapus bear?

[silver-tongues-blog]

[rosexknight]

PERRY THE PLATAPUS BEAR?!

[dankmemeuniversity]

[mmilhouse]

reblog if you support denim and hate capitalism

[liquidcoma-deactivated20160903]

jommunism

[doppelgender]

when you get a masters degree youre allowed to respond to your professors emails with “ok love you”

[i-hate-chick-fil-a]

Sexism? In my racism? Who could have thought?

[homofied]

[thearmada4231]

loving the avatar renaissance because it means I get to make memes again

[footnoteinhistory]

Every time a racist gets mad when talking about the Civil War you just gotta make your name for it longer and more truthful

Oh, you call it the “War for Southern Independence”? How about the Great Union Victory? The Yankee Triumph? The War of Southern Aggression in Defense of Slavery? The War of What W.E.B. DuBois Called White Southern Moral Cowardice, Fought and Lost by Weak Men and Traitors?

[kaisar-dot-com]

You dont have to suck Yankees off that much lmao its not so black and white

[footnoteinhistory]

I’m sorry are you upset about something I said concerning the War Where All The Southerners Had Little Dicks And Cried Like Babies When They Got Their Asses Kicked (1861-1865)

[teenscoolest]

me, a 16th century swordsman, with a new clay-tempered sword: *loudly but casually unsheathes it*

my friend, clearly peanut butter and jealous: oh. thats nice. is that c-

me: clay-tempered? yeah. it is.

[twitblr]

Very Normal behavior in a Very Normal country