Just a dorky little tree

Coming to this blog fills you with determination

[cheaphalloweencostume]

my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!

[goofda]

“Imma destroy that pussy” my friend 😔

[digitalmyyth]

Hanging out with people will make you remember you're the crazy woke friend for like. not wanting to shop at shien

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

starting a compilation

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

[nishitanis-artsy-nuts]

what if they danced in sotenbori? what then?

[adonischildsupportcase]

[screamingbingusthecromulentone]

[ID: tweet by @/WeatherRapport that reads "If I had a tiny girlfriend I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level"

/end ID]

[fribble-tribble]

the ultimate fantasy vs sci-fi standoff

[tony-the-tigers-juicy-armpit]

How quickly we forget the dangerous crow boy who’s job it is to destroy plastic

[silvaurum]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

[silvaurum]

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

[silvaurum]

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

[yellow-cat]

FUCK. i think i have to learn blender

[hamblimp]

the humble manual smoothie maker after they break their hands:

[yellow-cat]

every day i log in here and get beat up by genies

[yellow-cat]

HEY !!!!

[endlace]

the horse when asked what he would like for dinner

[yellow-cat]

put a bullet in me already why dont you

[yellow-cat]

hold on. everyone shut up. i need to cry about the concept of a touch-starved gun

[shit-hdb-would-say]

^ Harry du Bois would say that.

[portsandstars]

[jamiebythesea]

Et quoi about le nutriscore

[dogpuppy]

[ad-wills]

[agnesmontague]

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

[stellarskyes]

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

[agnesmontague]

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

[enbaluka-tokyo-drift]

[enbaluka-tokyo-drift]

[thememedaddy]

[local-lesbian-tree-demon]

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of