You Get Killed, Walk It Off

I'm the one going 90 in the Prius. Yes, this is my main blog. No, this isn't my primary blog. The FAQ has the explanation. Link for Sam is here.

[sophia-becketts]

Bridgerton | S04E02, "Time Transfixed"

[toastyglow]

"everyone is paying super close attention to everyone else all the time" actualy statistical error. hypervigilance georg, who enters fight or flight when someone starts breathing differently, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[bakurapika]

#this one's for the people who hear 'people aren't paying that close attention to you! I mean do YOU pay that close of attention to them?'#and go: unfortunately yeah!!!!!!!#you are georg hope this helps. love u#hang in there one day u will be able to pay less attention all the time

[timothyolyphant]

Death can't be changed.THE PITT S02E14

[pondnaravit]

[stitchposts]

Hey if you're coming to Washington DC for the Fourth of July: don't

We're having our turn in the heat wave and reports from the National Mall are brutal already this week. That screenshot is today's forecast (courtesy of the Capital Weather Gang) and tomorrow and Saturday are confidently going to be worse than this is.

The national Mall has no shade on the grass and you will be exposed to the sun constantly while also experiencing extremely high humidity. You will not be allowed a bag over a certain size to enter the mall and it has to be clear. You cannot have an insulated water bottle, it has to be clear. Reports are that there are two entrances to the area so you'll have to wait in line to even get in. I cannot find a number on how many cooling stations there are, except that it's "few" to "none" depending on what accounts I read online. Vendors are allegedly charging more than the posted prices and seem to be unprepared for actual crowds - these are the official vendors not the scam food trucks that park all around the edges of the mall. And that's the extent of the planning done because it was not a priority to make sure attendees don't pass out.

My local friends and I have reached a consensus that tourists are going to get extremely sick and none of us know what the EMT response or planning is on the mall this year. People are going to die.

Please stay out of this. It's not worth your health. Get your relatives and family to stop. I can give you recs for so many DC museums and things to do if you want to make the most of your trip. Any other local can too.

[sztupy]

A good day for Trump supporters to get a heat stroke

[stitchposts]

I cannot convey to you how much I do not want literal goddamn children to die. Also frankly, how I do not our local emts to have to watch any tourists die on their watch.

There is historically an assumption that attendees will have access to planned amenities. It's not in place this year of all years. There is a very real risk here and I'm trying to warn people, because people simply don't know how awful this is about to be.

Get fucked. This is very clearly a post trying to help people instead of rubbing my hands in glee.

[brawlite]

i have lived in the dc area for over 30 years, and the july 4 fireworks are simply just a huge event for tourists and locals, regardless of who is in office—it's a yearly tradition for so, so many families. the city gets absolutely jam packed with people, especially with children and older adults.

and dc is a swamp, literally. when we hit a heat wave like this, the heat just settles; it doesn't break at night and there's just zero relief, especially without shade in places like the mall. and without cooling stations or literally any other planning or precautions, people will get sick. they will get hurt. they will die.

if you know anyone planning on going, please tell them to stay home or find something else to do. watch the fireworks from somewhere else.

hoping everyone stays cool and safe.

[stitchposts]

Another user here pointed out that most of the roads are closed around the mall. This will impact medical care and response.

[thewellofastarael]

There are thunderstorms predicted for most of the weekend. The way that works in DC is that it'll be clear and punishingly hot/humid from the morning into the early afternoon, and then for about an hour you'll see the wind pickup. Then 10 minutes of darkening clouds before the skies open up with a barrage of rain and lightning.

The national mall is a wide open expanse with no cover but some trees, which are even more risky in thunderstorms.

[stitchposts]

Hey if you're coming to Washington DC for the Fourth of July: don't

We're having our turn in the heat wave and reports from the National Mall are brutal already this week. That screenshot is today's forecast (courtesy of the Capital Weather Gang) and tomorrow and Saturday are confidently going to be worse than this is.

The national Mall has no shade on the grass and you will be exposed to the sun constantly while also experiencing extremely high humidity. You will not be allowed a bag over a certain size to enter the mall and it has to be clear. You cannot have an insulated water bottle, it has to be clear. Reports are that there are two entrances to the area so you'll have to wait in line to even get in. I cannot find a number on how many cooling stations there are, except that it's "few" to "none" depending on what accounts I read online. Vendors are allegedly charging more than the posted prices and seem to be unprepared for actual crowds - these are the official vendors not the scam food trucks that park all around the edges of the mall. And that's the extent of the planning done because it was not a priority to make sure attendees don't pass out.

My local friends and I have reached a consensus that tourists are going to get extremely sick and none of us know what the EMT response or planning is on the mall this year. People are going to die.

Please stay out of this. It's not worth your health. Get your relatives and family to stop. I can give you recs for so many DC museums and things to do if you want to make the most of your trip. Any other local can too.

[sztupy]

A good day for Trump supporters to get a heat stroke

[stitchposts]

I cannot convey to you how much I do not want literal goddamn children to die. Also frankly, how I do not our local emts to have to watch any tourists die on their watch.

There is historically an assumption that attendees will have access to planned amenities. It's not in place this year of all years. There is a very real risk here and I'm trying to warn people, because people simply don't know how awful this is about to be.

Get fucked. This is very clearly a post trying to help people instead of rubbing my hands in glee.

[brawlite]

i have lived in the dc area for over 30 years, and the july 4 fireworks are simply just a huge event for tourists and locals, regardless of who is in office—it's a yearly tradition for so, so many families. the city gets absolutely jam packed with people, especially with children and older adults.

and dc is a swamp, literally. when we hit a heat wave like this, the heat just settles; it doesn't break at night and there's just zero relief, especially without shade in places like the mall. and without cooling stations or literally any other planning or precautions, people will get sick. they will get hurt. they will die.

if you know anyone planning on going, please tell them to stay home or find something else to do. watch the fireworks from somewhere else.

hoping everyone stays cool and safe.

[stitchposts]

Another user here pointed out that most of the roads are closed around the mall. This will impact medical care and response.

[basuralindo]

So I just simultaneously did, and possibly didn't lose my job today :)

Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.

So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.

But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.

It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?

So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:

Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.

And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.

So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".

So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.

I don't know what else to say aside from I've been laughing all day and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining Schrodinger's Unemployment to the benefits office.

[basuralindo]

Update that is not an update because I'm basically certain this isn't what actually happened:

My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.

Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.

Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.

Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).

Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues

(also shout out to the person who proposed Carmen Sandiego)

[basuralindo]

ACTUAL (partial) UPDATE:

According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.

Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.

For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.

So now I'm officially out of a job. Because my workplace was literally stolen in the night.

[basuralindo]

Actually fuck it let's share some photos cause I wouldn't be inclined to believe this myself. It's not like anyone can stalk me at my job now and I'm not gonna have to see any coworkers that might find my tumblr.

Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life

Aaand a close-up:

The last remains of a once Very Much Solid And Immobile Workplace

[basuralindo]

HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE

via @kagaminilen

[mysteryteacup]

[cut to a kiosk on legs, sipping a boba, while wandering into the nearest forest on chicken legs]

[ardanelvilyafeanturi]

Here you go @a-bit-too-dyscrasic

[cursedartandthensome]

Boba Yaga has my heart and my money. And I don't even like Boba

[antarcticconfessions-deactivate]

I love how it doesn't matter what expedition it is.

They all turn into excited kids when they meet penguins.

[asteroidtroglodyte]

The Penguin: GIANTS! no way! I’m gonna wave at them THEY WAVED BACK! Holy Shit they’re dancing with me! My Wife is never gonna believe this OMG I got to dance with a Giant today so cool.

The Humans: Penguin! No way! I’m gonna wave at it IT WAVED BACK! Holy Shit it’s flapping with me! I got to play with a Penguin today; so cool.

[number1wifemisser]

where's the joy and whimsy guy? Have they found this one yet?

[redmegarex]

@joy-and-whimsy-official

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!

Who am I to deny a penguin some joy and whimsy 🐧

[important-dog-pics]

[emziess]

It was your fiasco. Slow Horses – S01E05 – Fiasco

[mini-wrants]

Outdoor in sun perfec t place for president to do speech! Outdoor very warm very soft put old man on green lawn under sun. Put old man in warm sun. no problem ever in warm sun because good view and audience can see long speech. Nice podium outdoor sunny perfect place for old president can trust warm sun to give nice view to President good luck to President. friend sun.

[americanbrightside]

President William Henry Harrison 2

I don't know guys, I'm not sure he's tough enough to give an extended speech in this heat. No one would think less of him if he did the speech inside, or by an air conditioner

[wyrmscraft]

Stash!!!!!

I found these in my stash (looking for something else ofc) and immediately wanted to do a Luminous Nine Patch.

Now, now listen.

I know I seem to be making a few of these.

But they turn out gorgeous! How could I not make them?? They’re so easy and fun to do.

[wyrmscraft]

She is on fire!

Look at this thing! I love her! She’s gorgeous!

She’s bold and dramatic and demands attention!

I think this one is one of the best Luminous Nine Patch quilts I’ve done.

I’ll use orange thread to quilt it and put black cuddle on the back, along with black binding. I think that’ll finish her off nicely 💖💖

[wyrmscraft]

I was correct. The black cuddle and binding are just fab with this.

I did actually find a more golden yellow thread called Dessert Sunset that I used instead of orange to quilt with, and I love it.

Man. It looks so good in the sunlight.

[stupidrehab]

that’s just my nightstand knife don’t worry

[swan2swan]

Where's that tweet about how American chants are "let's go [team name] and some other country (Irish?) fans are "I've made up a song about the other team's drinking problem to the tune of London Bridge Is Falling Down one two three"?

[luimnigh]

[ladydevoir]

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[foxglovedforest]

[teaboot]

Oh, *my* favourite part of living in an apartment complex in the year of our lord 2025?

Well number one has gotta be paying 60% of my living wage on rent pre-utilities, but number two is definitely being home making dinner on my one night off this week and hearing my wall-neighbor shout “Alexa! Alexa! Alexa, play “dance monkey!” Alexa play dance monkey! Alexa volume down! Alexa stop! Alexa stop! Alexa, stop music! Alexa stop music, open Spotify! Alexa open Spotify and play Dance Monkey! Alexa play Dance Monkey! Alexa! Alexa volume up! Alexa!” for 20 fucking minutes and yes funny you ask it is still happening

[teaboot]

I thought to myself after posting this “you know maybe I’m just being irritable they haven’t been SO bad it’s mostly just been the yelling and the music and the parties and the loud sex and the yelling at Alexa but that’s mostly normal part of living in close proximity to people maybe I just need to chill” and then they had a bunch of people over to hang out in the yard and yell out the N word with the hard R on repeat so maybe they’ve just been dicks this whole time huh