You know, I used to like Destiel…. when I first entered the fandom I liked it, it wasn’t my OTP nor did I heavily ship it, because I felt more interested in the brothers’ relationship and Sam as a character.
I entered the fandom 3 years ago and in that time I realized that Cas and Dean relationship wasn’t there. Most of the ship is based on assumptions and even tho I like ships that are based on less (jimon) I also realized that neither Cas or Dean are relationship material (neither is Sam for that matter). Both of them have gone through so much and they aren’t dealing with the trauma in a healthy way which means they aren’t ready to be in a good relationship, and I also was most invested on the concept of Sam and Dean and their story.
So I started to distance myself from the ship. I still posted a few jokes on Tumblr, bc even tho I didn’t ship it, it didn’t mean I didn’t like some jokes. Then the problem began.
I’m a hardcore Sam girl, I love the character and its arc through the series. So (if you realized for my posts I love fanfictions) when I realized that most works that had Sam on it were Destiel focused I was a little disappointed, but that wasn’t the fanfiction authors’ fault, I couldn’t blame them for not writing what I liked, but it surprised me how little Sam content was compared to Destiel, on ao3 there are 4902 works with the tag sam/jess, but 3153 are tagged with Destiel on those works, that means that just 1749 works don´t have any Destiel on it. Or if you go on Tumblr most of the posts that are with sam tagged on it are Destiel, sometimes Sam isn´t even mentioned on the post,,, like why does everything have to be destiel centered? why Castiel or Dean´s character growth has to be only Destiel related? why every single episode has to have any kind of Destiel content? And why everything has to be twisted to become “destiel proof”?
So yeah, it was a little infuriating to find Cas/Dean material when I wasn´t looking, or even interested in it. Then I saw the toxic part of the fandom, I saw some so-called fans of the show asking for Jared to be fired, to have Sam out of the show just so it could be more Destiel focused. I was shooketh to see that, like the charm of the show is the relationship of the brothers, the things they would do for each other, how they would rather die or set the world on fire if it meant the other would be safe. I was not ok with the Sam bashing they were doing… I know that most shippers aren´t like that, but it seems as if the most active ones are like this and it was in that moment when I decided that I had to investigate, see if it this was common. And boy did I find some stuff.
Apart from the typical and so common ship wars, I found out about the harassment to writers and actors from the “destiehellers” (no destiel shippers, they are better than that). How Jensen is homophobic because he doesn’t like destiel? at this point, he can’t say even express discomfort when he is asked by destiel all the time on conventions, or when he has to sign straight ass porn of him and his co-worker, while being treated like trash on Twitter, accused of homophobia, of breaking fan’s dreams, etc..
But one of the things that disappointed me the most… was Misha. Let me explain, I’ve heard the term queerbaiting and destiel together… a LOT, big part of the shippers seem to think that the writers play Cas and Dean with jokes and subtext to make the fans think that they’re going to end up together and keep them watching the show. But how can it be queerbaiting when Jensen and writers have said tons of times that Destiel isn´t real and that Dean is in fact straight? well my friends, Misha is the one behind this, the only queerbaiting is being done by him, he is the one who makes most of the jokes, who encourages the fans to keep forcing destiel down to everyone troats (including Jensen), there was a time when it was funny, kind of meta, to have the actor himself conscious of the ship and fanfictions of the fanbase. But like everything in life, there are limits, and Misha crossed them hard. He makes references to the ship all the time, sometimes fooling the fans to think that that in the episode there´s going to be some dean/cas action when there´s none (the twist an shout tweet, the destiel turning point in season 14). Why would Misha do this? to keep himself relevant? to keep the fans’ love? to keep himself in the show? maybe, maybe not. I´m not the guy and I can’t make assumptions, I can only tell my opinion and the facts that form it, to me Misha is the one queerbaiting all of us. and I don’t know why. Hell, I used to like Castiel character’s arc, but now he just has been reduced to only a part of a ship by some fans and its own actor and I just want the character to die.
Some shippers and destiel hellers go so far and say that the writers won’t make Destiel canon because they are conservative or are afraid of the audience reaction, but that is complete bullshit. How could they be any of those things when queer representation is everywhere on the series? Charlie, God himself, Max, hell the whole season 11 was full of gay couples. They are not afraid of the queers, what really is going on (apart from the fact of Dean being straight) is the fact that SPN to them is not focused on romantic relationships, is about family and life and choices. This is a show of two brothers saving people, the world, and themselves, not about some cliche drama of love. And c’mon guys, the show is on the CW, the CW is full of queers.
So why to make this long-ass post about my take on destiel and its fanbase… well to let you know guys about this issue that not so many people seem to see. If you like Destiel, good for you, you are lucky because you have A LOT of content to satisfy your heart, but remember the rules of shipping: It’s just a ship, don’t harass people who don´t like it or actors and writers and respect other’s people´s ships.
So in conclusion, destiel is not the only thing that matters in this fandom, if you want to make destiel content then go, just tag well so us, no destiel shippers, can enjoy our stay on the fandom as well and please, please! stop accusing everyone who doesn’t like destiel of homophobia.