"oh, you're so pretty when you're rotten and mine. i think you're... divine." ♡ ana ♡ lvl. 24 ♡ she/her ♡ aego ♡ sideblog for fanfics and shipping bullshit ♡ i like dead doves so beware
realizing a headcanon of yours happens to make an element of canon even more heartbreaking when you hadn't even considered it from that angle previously
[ID from alt: emoji rubbing their hands together and grinning evilly. End ID.]
1. Your Love Has Got Me Going Like You Couldn't Imagine
𐕣 𖤐 𐕣 ronin beaufort x psychotic!devoted!reader
MASTERLIST
mature|F/M|archive warnings apply|in progress
tags: Killer Chat, Ronin Beaufort/Reader, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Fluff and Smut, Gore, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Torture, Obsessive Love, Murder as a Romantic Metaphor, NSFW
The air fell cold and damp around your shoulders as you walked up the steps to your apartment. Normally, you avoided coming and going from anywhere but the fire escape, but it was three in the morning. You figured none of your neighbors would see you, covered in blood, and truthfully you wanted an excuse not to parkour up to your window. You were fucking exhausted. Fumbling with your keys, you clumsily managed to unlock the door and practically fell inside, the door slamming shut behind you and rattling the flimsy cabinets beside it. As you put your bag down, your computer started ringing like a motherfucker.
Must be Ronin.
Logging in to The Slaughterhouse, you see a video call request from your (recently!!) boyfriend. You grin at his cheesy status message (“apparently Quite the Fine shoulder Devil”), then debate accepting the call. You were covered in blood and absolutely disheveled…but also, it was Ronin. That sight alone would probably be his jerk material for the week. Sighing, you clicked accept.
“Darlin’, I was worried you were leavin’ me hangin there!”
He blinks, taking in your post-murder-session look. A slight blush appears on his normally vampiric face as he shamelessly stares at the blood still pooling in your cleavage. Classic Ronin.
“Wasn’t leaving you hanging, Ro. I literally just fell into my apartment.”
“Clearly… y’know, you oughta clean that up darlin’. Wouldn’t want you to stain your precious apartment…”
You scoff, yet another of Ronin’s attempts to make fun of your aesthetic.
“Ro, just because I am a serial killer on a knockoff discord doesn’t mean my house needs to look like it. Although you clearly wouldn’t know, Mr. Edgy.”
He cackles out loud at this, and you can’t help but giggle. You’re nearly delirious at this point, dying for a shower and a long nap. He notices your giggles fade and your eyes seem to grow even more tired, at which point he remembers that three in the morning is not a typical time to be up and on a videocall.
“How ‘bout you get some beauty sleep, huh? Need you energetic so you can hear about my latest project.”
“God, yes. I’m gonna go wash this asshole’s blood off and then I’m hibernating for a month.”
He chuckles at the image of you in a little nest, worn out from your crimes. “Night, darlin’.”
“Night, Ro… wait, is that blood on your shi-”
He hangs up. Typical. Of course he didn’t shower after his murder, he probably got distracted by the news or the server responses. Wonder who he killed today…you decide to interrogate him in the morning, opting for your shower and crashing into bed as top priority.
The morning came far too soon, the blinding light of morning streaming through your apartment window.The light woke you up, but also a loud crash coming from what you’re pretty sure is inside your house. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes and grabbing the first heavy thing you see, you creep to the kitchen…
…And almost kill your boyfriend.
“Jesus Christ, Ronin!!”
“Y’know, that’s not what they usually call me-”
You smack him on the arm.
“Ronin, I almost cracked your skull with a lamp. What in the fresh fuck are you doing in my apartment at nine in the morning??”
“...was gonna make some breakfast, darlin’.”
That’s Ronin for ya. Showing his love in the most alarming ways. But damn if you didn’t love it. You stared at the man in front of you, jewelry shining against his coveralls. Damn, he had to go to work. Lucky you, stay-at-home writer. You look down at yourself, wearing a ginormous shirt you stole from Ro and fuzzy Spider-Man socks. Ronin stifles a laugh, but not enough. You glare up at him, yesterday’s mascara still smeared under your eyes.
“I wasn’t expecting company, you bastard.”
He grinned at you, turning back to the stove as he finished breakfast. Ronin wasn’t a great cook, so you were more than a little wary of the pancakes in front of you. Still, you appreciated it, so you took a bite. It was edible, sort of. The two of you ate in silence for a bit, until Ronin cleared his throat.
“So, darlin’...wanna hear about my kill last night?”
Now THIS was what you lived for. Discussing both your latest kills over food. It was your favorite part of the day, watching as your lover’s eyes sparkled with excitement as he reenacted his latest project.
“Um, duh. Tell me EVERYTHING,” you replied with a grin, eyes locked on the man before you. Ronin dissolved into the gory details of his murder, some deranged pedophile he’d found on the internet and mauled down in Purgatory for the world to gawk at. You just munched on your pancakes, silent except for an occasional remark or exclamation. And if you blushed as he described swinging his crowbar through the unexpecting skull of that stain on humanity, so be it. However, your peaceful moment was interrupted by your computer lighting up with a sudden influx of messages. You glanced at Ronin, who nodded in approval, then opened the Slaughterhouse. And then-
How easy would they get nervous ? Warnings: +18 / Banda being Banda / grammar mistakes / does Someone read this? lol /
Arisu ♤ 9/10
He gets nervous really easy. From the way you may look at him with the intention of something or by a quick kiss he was not expecting at all.
Is not necesary sexual. Arisu is just that easy. He loves you and sees you as pure and to be cared of.
Chishiya ♤ 2/10
He is a wall of emotions. Hug him, kiss him, tell him the most sexual thing.
This Man does not blush or blink. Maybe he blinks like saying "Really?" With exasperation but love no less.
Karube ♤ 5/10
BE READY TO GET IT BACK!!
Karube is a natural flirt. Is not like he wants to, it just comes to him. And you may get him to shut up for a few seconds if you caught him off guard. But he will do a uno reverse and get you even more nervous. His favorite way to do it is to keep his eyes on yours till you get all red.
Tatta ♤ 10/10
Call him cute and he is gone. Yes he is that easy. Make a sexual comment or use some clothes you know will turn him crazy.
No words, his brain is out. He cant talk, he is red he is sweating.
Banda Sunato ♤ -1/10
HAHAHAHA GET HIM NERVOUS? He may have the police with evidence of his crimes and be like: mhm
Banda does not get nervous. He gets high from your tries. He smirks then pushes you against a wall and whispers the most depraved things into your ear.
Yaba Oki ♤ 1/10
He is well controlled. May look impressed by your try and then smile. Whispers how he is going to make you scream and re thing your actions.
Niragi ♤ 1/10
Dont try. Niragi will just laught at you. His years of bullying have made him completly inmune to anything.
Will teast you for it. A lot.
Aguni ♤ 7/10
He does not show it but his stomach does a flip. Yes he gets nervous, if you start to touch his arm without notice or talk in that low tone.
Oh he knows.
He knows your game.
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