they see me tumblin

adult | they/them | blog is occasionally 18+

[thehappysmiler]

[thehappysmiler]

favorites

[unforth]

[sic-semper-hominibus]

[duckingwriting]

[duckingwriting]

This thread lives rent free in my brain. And randomly came across my FB feed so of course I had to dig it up out of my Tumblr to share what fb shared.

[notemily]

I like this one

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i appear to have made mortal nemeses with a pigeon

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

tumblr stop rooting for the pigeon

[iamcon-fu-sion]

pick a side

team gaud

team pigeon

Voting ended onJun 1

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

CEASE THIS IMMEDIATELY

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

you people are. unkind to me

[draconym]

The eye doctor is the most fun doctor you can go to. They never steal your blood. They never make you get naked and put on a paper dress. They're just like, "Can you see these letters? It's fine if you can't, we can fix that." And they don't even spell anything.

[draconym]

[orcboxer]

Every time I go they put me in a chair and they say look into this machine there's a hot air balloon or a farmhouse in there and I do and I'm like you're right I see it and they're like yeah keep admiring that hot air balloon or farmhouse and I do and I'm like this shit's quaint as fuck and then do you know what happens next they attack me they jumpscare me with air directly into my eyeballs and i fall out the chair and they say sorryyyy but they're NOT they wanted this to happen they KNEW about the jumpscare well now I'm wise to it now I know better when I go in and they say look at this bodacious hot air balloon I'm like NO WAY DUDE that balloon wishes me harm have at thee and I attack them and push them on the ground and spit on them

[depsidase]

[do-not-u-dare]

Stole this from somewhere but i think it’s appropriate

[finnglas]

when i was a tiny baby queer (aka a 24-year-old), i went to my first pride festival probably three months after i kicked ex-gay therapy to the curb and came out to my parents. being the people they are, my parents came with me. they weren’t really sure about this whole gay thing, but they loved me and wanted me to be safe and happy and wanted to be involved in what was important to me, so they came along. (i also think my mother still might have thought i might get drugged or murdered or beaten by a protester of which there were plenty.)

anyway i wanted a memento of my first pride, you know, and this one vendor was selling keyrings, and i liked it, so i bought one. do you remember those italian charm bracelets that were all the rage like 10-15 years ago? it was a keychain like that, and it had a rainbow rooster, a rainbow cat, and then just a rainbow, and so I bought it.

i run into my mom a couple of vendors over and she goes oh you bought something? what’d you get? so i showed her, and i was like, “I’m not sure why it’s a rooster and a cat. Seems kind of random. But I liked the rainbows.”

and my mom, who was some form of minister’s wife for most of my childhood and teenagerhood, stares at me like she thinks i’m joking.

“What?” i say.

“…it’s a cock and a pussy, Jules,” she says flatly, and that is the story of how i died at the age of 24 while attending my first pride festival.

[finnglas]

I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.

[finnglas]

oh no is this what we’re doing now

[finnglas]

…relic…

*crumbles and blows away on the wind*

[bidoof]

Change.org - Petition To Hire 1,000,000 People To Put Their Fingers In The Shoot Hole Of Peoples’ Guns So They Can’t Shoot Them

[mycatisnamedfrank]

It’s still gonna shoot… And they’re gonna lose a finger

[bidoof]

No. The finger blocks the bullet. We can do this

[domozillla-deactivated20181216]

This is a gun we’re talking about. The projectile is fired using an explosion, not by compressed air of a toy gun or the elastic forces of a sling shot. People would be lucky if they only lost their finger.

[bidoof]

The finger blocks it

[dildomuncher3000]

The finger won’t block it - the shaft is only there for keeping the bullet straight, all the propulsion happens behind the bullet. The bullet would rip through the finger, not that many would actually fit without the victim being a child, and beyond.

[bidoof]

The bullet would go forward a little and then hit the finger and stop it’s not that hard to understand

[fifty-percent-possessed-deactiv]

People are going to lose their hands. Go watch Mythbusters. They did an episode on this, the hand fucking exploded.

[hungwy]

No, the bullet would start to go but stop at the finger. Thats basic physics. Also hands dont explode normally they did something wrong.

[blipblerp]

Why the dingleknockers would you even consider sticking your finger in the barrel of a loaded gun?? the amount of force propelling the bullet at that close of range would shatter the finger at the very least; this is a petition for 1,000,000 people to loose the use of their hands. If a bullet explodes the back of a persons skull when they shoot it in their mouth it sure as hell will explode a finger.

[gorps]

No the finger would stop it

[joryboi]

I’m loving the idiocy of this post.

Ppl with brains: ummm finger go boom…

Others: no bullet stop. U no kno fisics >:V

[foulserpent]

no the finger would stop it

[indianworiorprincess-blog]

You guy who think the bullet would stop at the finger have never shot a gun and can volunteer to it their fingers in the barrel of my 9 mil and I’ll I’ll the trigger and see if it will stop the bullet. Dumdasses

[foulserpent]

the finger would stop it

[meatswitch-deactivated20231107]

[heritageposts]

date of origin: 28th of december, 2015.

[petalsbleedingbeak]

These fuckwits are back again? How’s it going, Nine Finger Nasty? About to turn into an Eight Finger Egghead?

@meatswitch @raptorific this is a US based site. US Americans are known for two things- obsession with guns and incredible stupidity. Had this been anyone else, I’d say they’re trying to fuck with us. But with US Americans, about 70% of them are dead serious about mangling their hands trying to stop a bullet.

[meatswitch-deactivated20231107]

I’ve had four years to think about it and now I think the finger would stop it

[gorps]

I just tested it with my buddy. It stops the bullet

[several-large-churros]

….Mythbusters WELDED A METAL SPIKE into the barrel of a gun to obstruct it, something heaps stronger than a human finger (and sealed the barrel better with the filler metal used to fuse the metal spike into place and prevent the explosive gases from escaping) but even that didn’t stop the bullet from doing damage.

[gorps]

It’s because they didn’t use a finger like I did

[silicon65]

Gef the Talking Mongoose

[heckthatbork]

@snewts

[pending-trans-action-2]

Mutuals are a lot like cats in that you kinda have to harmlessly pester and annoy them sometimes

[virtualgirladvance]

*brushes all your fur the wrong way so you look like a feather duster*

[auternadelaide-deactivated20240]

reblog to pet your mutuals the wrong way

[snewts]

@yeenking

[lettheladylead]

can you draw something for me to masturbate to

sure

good luck!

[snewts]

Per Aspera (a Time Wish/Do-Over au comic) part 4

parts 1-3 here

[serpexnessie]

Average Tomodachi Life Conversation

[fhauly]

repeat after me: i am a sexy bitch and no one ruins my 2014

[animentality]

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

why is ao3 is blocked on the hospital wifi????

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

It’s not even the public hospital wifi. I’m on the staff wifi. which one of you anesthesiologists was reading omega verse on the clock.

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

Thankfully, I am saved by the power of having a total of 7 followers on this blog.

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

The power of having a total of 7 followers on this blog has failed me.

[daisukitoo]

I have been thinking about small children and small dogs.

It is sometimes observed that small dogs can be unholy terrors. I have come to think this is more because of unintentional training rather than a lack of training.

If you have a large and potentially dangerous dog, you will probably seek to train it just so it does not damage your home or family. If you have a 2 kg dog, you just pick it up and move it if it is misbehaving.

This inadvertently trains your small dog to escalate if it wants any degree of self determination. It avoids someone but gets picked up. It runs away but gets picked up. It barks, it growls, it gets scolded and picked up. If it goes absolutely berserk and does its best to kill someone, it might not get picked up. You have taught your dog *this* is what it takes to be taken seriously as a very small animal.

Small children are often treated a lot like small pets. They are small people filled with needs and wants, almost powerless in the face of a nigh incomprehensible world. And larger people scold them and pick them up when their needs and wants are inconvenient for the larger people.

I have been around many small children this week and seen many meltdowns. Some of them are just exhausted and overstimulated. Some are probably classic brats who have been taught they can get their way if they just whine enough, which is a variation on the same idea.

But I must believe that some of them have learned this is the *only* way they will get *any* attention to their stated wants and needs.

Your parents have a plan and an agenda for the day, and you were not consulted because you are 4 years old, but you are still a human being with needs to understand and to some extent control your environment, and if the only way you can get anyone to listen to you for 5 minutes is to make those minutes absolute hell for everyone involved, yourself included, well, that is what it takes.

When you are 4 years old, fairly petty inconveniences can in fact be the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Small children can have the best and worst moments of their lives several times a day. They are learning the bounds of "normal," and they don't have many days that could have been worse.

It can be hard being a Very Small Animal.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Every single odd number has an “e” in it.

[savvygunner]

[violetnpurple]

LISTEN-

[bl6ckwoman]

Not all of them. 30 and 50 aren’t spelled with the letter e in it …

[antiandrogen]

[teamnowalls-deactivated20180918]

father god 

[abrown16]

…if you can split a number in half evenly, it’s even. 30 and 50 are odd.

[antiandrogen]

[ethereal-sketches]

-_-’

(15+15=30

25+25=30)

[britteryikes]

25+25 = 30? You sure about that??

[laurdlannister-kingslayer]

Lord have mercy….

[kumasenpai]

Bye

[mf-johnson-deactivated20190605]

3 days into 2018 smh

[kwantsu]

LMAOOOOOOO

[effigyofubiquity-deactivated202]

[lizzysarai-deactivated20190109]

One

Three

Five

Nine

And since everything else after that is a variant of these numbers, then all odds have the letter ‘E’.

[britteryikes]

🗣YOU FORGOT SEVEN!!

[thxrsdxy]

It keeps getting worse.

[e-wifey-deactivated20201128]

LMAOOO WHAT IS GOING ON

[ellsworthej]

[goldensweetcheeks-deactivated20]

My head hurts…

[skullprincess]

This is why that Tumblr University shit was the dumbest idea ever just look at this

[drankinwatahmelin]

who failed yall?

[microtear-deactivated20181213]

IM SCREAMING

[lukestarkillerisgay]

[hey-hey-shutthefuckup-deactivat]

You whole ass forgot about eight - a number with an e and is pretty fucking even

[shaolinbynature]

why would 8 be brought up if it’s EVEN in a post about ODDS??????? the post said “every single ODD number has an ‘e’ in it” not “every single number with an ‘e’ is odd” what the fuck

[emma-d-klutz]

3 days until 2019 and we’re still here

[legowerewolf]

happy New year’s eve

[prguitarman]

I’m going to bring this flaming dumpster into 2019 so future generations can see what a mistake Tumblr was

[majitowfoxlover]

Er, guys two is odd and doesn’t have an e. Just saying…

[hurleyquinnzel]

did you deadass just try to tell me two is odd? i’m fucking crying throw the whole website away

[untitled42717]

Reblogging for the last one😂

[kitsumekat]

The one thing I notice is that no matter how much you want to throw this site away, you just can’t.

[alternative-memo-deactivated202]

TWO IS ODD?!?! PFFFTT I’M SCREAMING

[binkeljuice]

Wait what about zero that’s an odd number ,no?

[hurleyquinnzel]

[mysticalpoodle]

ok but hear me out fifty and thirty make up for the fact they have no e by the way they are pronounces third-E fifth-E

[im-an-aesthetic-mess]

bro why do 30 and 50 matter THEY’RE FUCKING EVEN

[fish-food-s]

what the actual fuck is happening

[dickplinko]

1 is an even number

[link-the-feral-anon]

I’m gonna smack you

[insert-gay-pun-queer]

-30 and -50 have an e in them

[kurlyfryz]

Wait why are we so quick to throw away the Zero idea

[anachronistic-cat]

Zero isn’t a number

[kurlyfryz]

It can’t be divided by two though, can it

[toaster-120]

It can??? 0/2=0??

[kurlyfryz]

[baconaxolotl101]

OD NUMBERS

onE

thrEE

fivE

sEvEn

ninE

[batsdotjpg]

OD numbers huh?

[the-kleptomancer]

Anything that ends with a 0,2,4,6,8 is even and the rest is odd (1,3,7,9) stop freaking out y’all

[batsdotjpg]

YOU FORGOT 5

[ozzypawsbone-princeofbarkness]

DUDE WHAT ABOUT FOUR

[batsdotjpg]

What about it?????

[ozzypawsbone-princeofbarkness]

THAT DOESN’T HAVE E IN IT

[batsdotjpg]

THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S EVEN?????

[frogseyy]

A R E Y O U G U Y S O K A Y

[getinthehandbasket]

21 days away from 2020, folks.

[victusinveritas]

For those not in the know, this is one of the Amanita mushrooms referred to as a Destroying Angel. Never, ever, ever, ever forage with an app. Especially for mushrooms.