d e v o n
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almost home
Product Placement
ojovivo
taylor price
KIROKAZE
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dirt enthusiast
roma★
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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sheepfilms
Monterey Bay Aquarium
hello vonnie
JVL
Peter Solarz
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Three Goblin Art
trying on a metaphor
seen from United States
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@tnrach
Anyone else completely freaked out and a little scared by the new “Tickle Me Elmo, the laughter is back” commercials??? THEY ARE SO CREEPY!!!!
PS why are they “resurrecting” Tickle Me Elmo anyway... the most annoying and stupid and weird toy there has been in the past fifteen years at least...
*looking in a mirror trying to practice self-love* ur doing great u stupid bitch
if it weren’t illegal i would eat cereal for every meal of the day
i have some wonderful news for you
I’m a tumblr ghost...
I may or may not be on Tumblr much AT ALL in the near future or the next quite a while. Which if you do “follow” my blog you probably already noticed. I have recently started a new job that I love, but which is taking almost all of my thoughts, time, attention right now. Not trying to sound pretentious or rude. Just wanted to explain.
(if anyone wants to connect w me on FB message me and I will add if I feel comfortable; I know you mostly probably don’t, and also my FB is pretty boring, but I’m on it every day unlike tumblr, and I just wanted to throw that out there.)
my plan is to jog in a zip code where the average house is $1 million dollars. i jog everyday. i run into the trophy wives jogging club. we jog past each other so often, they’re forced to interact with me. we’re friends now. i’m invited places. i meet other millionaires, men who love me. i marry the richest, using an alias. throughout the first year of marriage, i’m moving assets and cash to an off shore bank account. i fake my own death on our anniversary. he’s heartbroken.
i started jogging in a new million dollar neighborhood. i’ve just made friends with the local jogging crew headed by ashtonlynn and brotyna “chichi” who has a single millionaire brother,
Is there any version of this plan where I don’t have to jog
u only have to jog past the ladies which is like 46 seconds. suck it up for the fraud of it all
this reminds me very much of Dwight Schrute’s “Tiffany” monologue.... I truly think Dwight or someone related to him wrote this monologue...
Compare...
“What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years; she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.”
if u have pets, reblog this what u call them besides their name
OK I have four pets... so my tags include the “nicknames” of all four of them haha, at least the ones I can think of right now...
I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m on my way.
Carl Sagan (via wordsnquotes)
The windier it gets, the wiser this dog looks via http://ift.tt/2whflR7 putyouinabettermood.com
https://instagram.com/p/BLJah8BBKm-/
do you know how many bones the human body has? its 206. we start with 369 when we’re babies but they fuse. wouldn’t you want to go back? have as many bones as a baby? what if i could help you
hi yeah what the actual, literal, GENUINE fuck does this mean
OK aside from the incomprehensible ridiculous combination of wordsin this original post, I must point out that it’s kind of funny/ironic that the OP’s name is gooeyshark, when sharks have absolutely no bones at all in their bodies, just cartilage... like no mr./mrs. shark I don’t think you’ll be able to help me find any bones bc you don’t even know how to GROW them... are you trying to lure me in so you can steal some of MY bones?
(yes I know this post/reply is just as ridiculous as the OP but I felt it needed to be said...)
I’m just going to throw this out there, but if you haven’t watched Leah Remini’s Scientology: The Aftermath you should.
Leah and the crew and all the guests are really risking their lives even making this docuseries because the church of Scientology has been known to go after naysayers in very viscious ways that have led to prison as well as some more suspicious ones that look like they could be homicide a little bit (allegedly).
Basically this cult is really awful and ruins people’s lives and Leah and the crew are trying to stop it and they interview former members of the church and stuff and it is just a really interesting show.
Johnny Cash’s first wife was black. Totally erased in the movie.
the Man In Black was not having your racist bullshit, and his children won’t let you piss on his grave.
I just
He’s the Man in Black. He was a vocal proponent of prison reform and prison rights. Half of his catalog is social justice. Why do you think he toured PRISONS it wasn’t just Folsom!
Johnny Cash was Punk As Fuck
Man In Black by Johnny Cash. Johnny Cash always wore black clothes, and he wrote this song to help explain why: “I wear the black for the poor and the beaten down, livin’ in the hopeless, hungry side of town, I wear it for the prisoner who has long paid for his crime, but is there because he’s a victim of the times.”
Johnny Cash literally wore his protest.
This post is not complete without this... Listen. It will give you cold chills.
More Dog Snapchats On Bored Panda
We don’t deserve dogs.
Puppies!
I laughed the loudest at the pool one, but the therapy dogs was my favorite.
@thefingerfuckingfemalefury
Doggos! :D
<3 How are they real <3
First I didn’t know if the last one was a merge of fluffy toy and cement dog figurine or an actual dog XD
how did jk manage to write ootp and not come to the conclusion that the only career w any true meaning for harry james potter was as a goddamn professor at hogwarts like how do u write the da scenes and say “nah he’d want to be a wizard cop”
#just let him dress in warm sweaters and have tea with neville in the staff room and help first years #harry james potter as hogwarts longest serving defense against the dark arts teacher fucking fight me (@batcii)
#but it would be so perfect??? #bc it would help normalize his life so much #like there would just be this generation of kids who are like #‘ugh who cares that he killed the dark lord he gAVE US HOMEWORK OVER BREAK’ #like the beginning of every year there would be the new first years who would freak out a little #but then it would calm down #and most of the students would literally forget #until like clockwork the fifth years would have their history of magic class on the second war #and they’d all show up to DADA looking a little awestruck and everyone would be extra quiet #and harry would give this kind of annoyed sigh—except it’s fake bc he TOTALLY knew this was coming #bc binns is a bro and he totally gives him a heads up every year #and harry wouldn’t have any lesson plans for the day and instead he would just sit at the front of the room and answer everyone’s questions #but otherwise everyone would just be like ‘professor potter!! i can’t get my patronus to work! help me!’ #and like they’d go home at the end of the year or for break and their parents—who ARE still starstruck by harry james potter #would pester their kids with questions#and the kids would just be like ‘merlin i don’t know?? potter’s such a huge dork you should hear him talk about proper wand movements’ #but they would all love him #and he would feel safe and normal and utterly accepted #AND I NEED THIS IN MY LIFE (via @cinematicnomad)
Not to mention it would be an ultimate Fuck You to Voldemort, who put a curse on the teaching position in the first place.
Like, Jo, I don’t want to tell you how to do your job, but COME ON
I already queued this but also, you do this, but still have Ginny become a famous Quidditch player. Imagine the first time Harry gets called “Ginny’s husband” before “the boy who lived” or “the chosen one.” Imagine how fucking pleased he’d be.
Imagine the first time a student comes up to him looking starry-eyed and Harry’s thinking “Oh no” because he doesn’t want to talk about Voldemort or the war but instead this little eleven year old is like “ARE YOU REALLY MARRIED TO WEASLEY FROM THE HOLLYHEAD HARPIES???!?? WHAT’S SHE LIKE?” and he’s like “oh thank god” because he could talk about Ginny all day.
Yes. Good.
today at work a man brought a pug in on a leash and that pug was so excited and happy to see me it was as if we were old friends who havent been in contact in 7 years i felt so loved in that moment
today a bassett hound came in and wagged her tail so furiously all of her loose skin started to jiggle and she was so pumped to see me i want more dogs to come into my store they make my life whole and worthwhile
I’m so glad this came back cause a golden retriever named Milly came in today who put her paws on my register counter and wanted to say hi to me and I loved her so much and I scratched her ears and she gave me that classic dopey dog smile
yesterday a girl came in with her boyfriend and in her hand was a tiny tan colored dog that she told me was a chihuahua/pekingese mix and he had a severe underbite and one little canine tooth was poking out and his ears were like bent at the tips and i immediately commented on how amazing he was and she goes omg thanks do you wanna pet him and i was like there is literally nothing more i want to do while being on the clock right now than to pet this incredible tiny dog and he was so sweet and licked my hand and his name was spike
yesterday these people came in and put a blanket into one of our shopping baskets and it started to move and i was like omg whats in there and they set it down on the counter and the blanket kept moving and the suspense was so good like is it gonna be a cat is it gonna be a ferret maybe a lizard and then the smallest chihuahua ive ever seen in my life popped her little head out and licked my finger and i died
A baby german shepherd named Jonathan came in tonight and since i was on the sales floor and not behind a counter i say to the owner omg can i pet this angel and they were like yeah of course and i crouched down and Jonathan ran into my arms and almost tripped over his puppy feet it was 12/10
TODAY a german shepherd named london grabbed one of our lanterns off the shelf and was carrying it around and the owner was like, “london no, we’re not getting that” and gave him the merchandise she was buying instead and he carried it to me and dropped it on the counter at my register and i could have cried
I want everyone to know both London and Jonathan (Jonnie) came in the other day on the same day. Jonnie is much larger since the last time I saw him but still sweet and still acts like a pup, he barked at something in our footwear department. London still likes to carry things and put his paws up on my register to say hello, he carried the insoles his owner bought out the door for her. Also thanks for the notes, it’s nice to see so many people appreciate dogs on here. Another reminder, I see a lot of dogs because I work in a sporting goods store in a strip mall next door to a Petco and we absolutely allow dogs in our store. I live in a mountain town in Colorado and dogs are common here because there are lots of fun outdoor stuff to do with them.
A sheltie in a Petco shopping cart came in yesterday and her name was Sadie and she was so excited to say hi that she jumped out of the cart, onto my register counter, but she missed and Mufasa’d her way to the floor, but she was okay. The owner just let her sit on the counter and she was very well behaved and she gently smelled every item I scanned and also my hand. She was obsessed with her neck being scratched.
today a black lab name paxton came in off leash and he jiggled his way into our back room because the door was open and i yelled He Is Employed! and told his owner that we’d be happy to hire him and then eventually he made his way up to the front by himself and into the register area behind the counter and now he’s my new manager
The most dangerous game is resting your eyes after you turned off the alarm clock in the morning
Unspirational.
