Keep Going, Even When You Are Tired

This blog is for a book I will never truly write. It is not meant to offend anyone, just read it. If you like it, keep reading, if you don't, simply move on with your life. All works by avery parker

[toashandbones]

TITLE: when will it end?

I want to die

I want to die

I want to die

I sit here with my friends and I do try but I want to die

I try to live life, love, laugh and cry but I want to die

To tell you the truth it’s this

I can count on one hand how many days I wished to live

And I can count all the stars in the sky before I can count the times I wanted to die

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

I quit… maybe not yet…

When can I quit?

When I’m dead tired with no will to live?

When can I quit?

When my dark thoughts win even if I’m not amiss?

When can I quit?

When I stand in a room of loved ones past, haunting my memories of the good old days that never were or could never last?

When can I quit?

When I lay awake at night, wondering why it is the way it is?

When can I quit?

When I see others chasing dreams and how I wish I could be like this?

When can I quit?

When my hands and knees are bloody from begging for a chance to live a life I hate for just one more day?

When can I quit?

No, never kid. You can’t quit because someone someday lied and said it’ll get better if you stay.

-avery parker just wants to quit so they can rest… I’m so tired…

[toashandbones]

Another Round

People shouldn’t have to fight this hard

But it’s been like this since the start

Drag yourself out of bed

Get out of your own head

Yeah it’s hard but this is only the start

Grow tired if you may but you can’t rest today

When you rest you stop

And that’s when you get lost

Lost in your own damn thoughts

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

Final hours

I don’t believe to call those who take their own life a coward

How dare you call them that in their final hour?

It’s the bravest thing I know to do just as so

And for those of you who think it’s a cowards act to take that bow and never look back

Let me tell you this, so listen close

They have fought monster and demons you can never know

Ones so strong and terrifying, you could never dream of such beings

They fight day in, they fight day out, they fight day to night and never have a rest or even the slightest delight in the victories they made it through because a greater demons came out when they beat one or two

They fight monsters you couldn’t imagine

Monsters so strong you couldn’t stand against

Not on your best of days, in your strongest hour

No you’d lose the fight, no doubt about it

But they fought forever, no rest, only slaughter

No, no, you are not a coward

You are simply just at your final hour

So rest well young warrior, it’s ok to stop

I promise you this much

You are the strong

No need to fight, go on and rest

You are no coward, only in your final hour

-avery parker is almost at their final hour…

[toashandbones]

Death is the only salvation for a tired soul

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

What I want most in this world? To be living in london or Paris, studying at Uni, in my own loft and never worrying about money again... to get the help that I need and to talk to someone about these thoughts that haunt me. I’d pay any price for this life... for a different path than the one I crawl on every night...

[toashandbones]

I’m going to have to explain how I’m not fully Dyslexic but brain damaged instead... it takes longer for me to learn something but I’m a quick learner so it doesn’t seem like that at all... this problem only really holds me back when I’m learning a new language... I hate this

[toashandbones]

Imagine this

Imagine that

Somehow, someway

Creation loves you

And it loves you well

-an unloved avery parker

[toashandbones]

Keep quite until you make it

Not a soul to know

Not a sound to be spoken

The world doesn’t need to know

Time moves as you choose

-avery parker got into college

[toashandbones]

There is a part of me that is broken

Shattered beyond my years

I trusted you and you broken what’s left

And yet still I trust again

What a fool I am

What a mess

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

I like winter the best. The cold mornings, the icy breath. And the long sleeves to hide the mess...

-an avery parker who hopes you don’t understand the meaning of this

[toashandbones]

An untamable rage that burns brighter than hell

A cold cold stare, you can not heal

Hell fire burns colder than my rage

I pray you never know this pain

[toashandbones]

I like the taste of blood in my mouth

Lifes ganna get you

It’s going to beat you down

And all you can do is stand back up

Bloodily mouth and all

Give it a smirk, and ask for more

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

The End of my March...

My armor is cracked...

One... two....

A chip here, a chip there, there’s nothing I can do

Honestly... what kind of knight can I be

When my armor lays broken in two....

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

Your blessing, my curse

Your throne, my crown

Take all that’s mine

Not giving it back this time

My gift, your hands

My kingdom, your throne

Death to all that we know

-avery parker

[toashandbones]

Peace just wanted to be free

So it killed war

Stained its hands red

Now it’s chained

Caught in its own web

Peace just wanted to be free

But what a price it paid in the end

Avery Parker

(I took the first line from a shirt I kept seeing)

[toashandbones]

the reason you are sad

In this world, there is only so much sadness. As there is only so much happiness. That’s sadness you feel, you feel so others do not have to.

-avery parker