He was your primary care physician after all, and your cardiac specialist. He's gone over the basic routine check up questionnaires with you more times than he can count at this point.
Plus, he carefully recorded your physicals every six months instead of yearly due to your profession and cardiac anomaly - all of which had a mental health questionnaire that he carefully watched your pen hesitate on every time he hands it to you.
"This silly thing again? Do I really have to?" Your face scrunched as he handed you the clipboard, the same generic questions listed in harsh black inky font. How often do you feel scared? How often do you feel down or depressed? Do you worry you are a danger to yourself?
"Standard procedure, I have to send these results over to your supervisor to ensure her that you are in good mental standing." The same calculated answer each time, his eyes slightly narrowed as he watches your pen hesitate over some of the options before ultimately deciding to check off "never" for each and every one.
"I mean I guess I get it. Our job can be pretty traumatic every so often but..." You sigh, handing him the clipboard with answers that feel less than sincere. "...I've answered these perfectly every single time."
"Answering them perfectly and answering them truthfully are two separate things." He never dared to push... until right now.
Zayne doesn't look at the sheet as he takes the clipboard from you, watching you blink in astonishment but unable to find any words. "I am your primary care physician and your cardiologist. But I am also your childhood friend, and your husband. I'm worried about you."
You blink, feeling much like a deer caught in headlights. You've never been one to fully open up about your feelings, especially your mental health. Zayne is quite similar in that aspect, you two found balance and understanding in that awkward space and made it work. But, clearly he's seeing something you aren't if he's toeing the line.
"You do know there is no shame or judgment in asking for help, right? Especially from me, my love." He pulled his glasses off, no longer speaking to you as doctor and patient. Rather, as a husband talking to his wife. "I'm not going to force you to open up either, I know it can be terribly unbearable to do. But I want you to know I am here."
"I know you are, Z. I didn't mean to keep these things from you, honestly I think not talking about them was my own way of trying to pretend they weren't there at all." You swallow, clasping your hands tightly and tugging at your now clammy fingers.
"If I didn't acknowledge the feeling, didn't label the anxiety attacks as anxiety or the hopelessness as depression then I could just keep pushing forward and eventually it would... go away on its own. But..." you trail off, cheeks warm and eyes struggling to hold his intense gaze.
"...But they're not going anywhere, are they?"
You shake your head, pressing your lips together as you finally admit defeat to your own stubbornness. "I don't know what to do." It's barely a whisper, weak and broken as you finally dare to look at the man you love so dearly with wide watery eyes. "That's why I'm here."
He stands, moving around his desk to kneel down in front of you. Carefully undoing the tight grasp you have on yourself and taking your clammy fingers into his own. "Not only as someone who loves you more than life itself." He starts softly, smiling as he observes your hands in his. "But as your doctor, who can get you what you need."
"When can we start?" His hand is gentle as it releases one of yours to carefully wipe a stray tear from your cheek. "We can start right now, by you truthfully answering that silly thing again."
For once, you aren't so hesitant to answer that damn questionnaire.
Is this like super self indulgent in a niche way? Maybe. Do I still hope some of y'all can relate or at least find comfort in it? Of course. I'm an open book on here because y'all don't know my real name or seen my face so I don't mind oversharing.
But can I just say, the mental health questionnaires were always my biggest battles because I never answered them truthfully until I started seeing my psychiatrist last month and now ya girl is officially diagnosed with severe anxiety, depression, and OCD. Even got prescribed antidepressants like damn bro only took about 16 years to fess up.
f2u MC gifs/stickers
i can't believe we're getting a joyride card!!! did y'all see MC running to hug him? #felt that (เนหฬ๊ดหฬเน)
good luck to everyone pulling!
Rafayel gasps like you just stabbed him. โDid youโ Did you just reject me?! Me?!โ
He freezes mid-pucker, eyes widening. Then the dramatics hit: hand dramatically over his heart, head tilting back with a theatrical gasp.
โWow. Wowww. The love of my life just rejected me like Iโm some cheap paintbrush. Heartless. Cruel. Iโm literally going to wither away right here on this couch.โ
He flops backward, arms crossed, full-on pouting and refusing to look at youโฆ for about three seconds. Then he peeks through his lashes, voice dropping into that whiny-sulky tone:
โFine. Ignore your poor fish.โ
Heโll crawl back two minutes later, dramatically draping himself over your lap demanding โcompensation kissesโ while grumbling.
๐ซ๐๐ฉ๐๐๐ฅ
You tilt your head at the last second so his lips brush your cheek instead of your mouth.
He pauses, blue eyes blinking slowly. A tiny, dangerous little smile tugs at his lips, the one that says heโs about to ruin you in the gentlest way possible.
โMmmโฆ dodging me now?โ
He doesnโt get mad. He just lazily reaches out, hooks two fingers in the collar of your shirt, and tugs you straight back into his chest. Voice husky against your ear:
โYou know running only makes me want to chase you more, right?โ
Then he nuzzles into your neck, planting soft open-mouthed kisses along your jaw until youโre squirming. โNext time you dodgeโฆ Iโm not stopping at one kiss.โ
๐ญ๐๐ฌ๐ก๐
You turn your face so his kiss lands on the corner of your mouth. One perfectly arched eyebrow lifts. Ice-cold gaze pins you in place.
โInteresting choice,โ he says, voice calm but dripping with that signature dry sarcasm.
He doesnโt chase immediately. He just slowly loosens his tie, steps closer until youโre backed against the wall, and tilts your chin up with two fingers.
โHeart rateโs elevated. Pupils dilated. Youโre not actually rejecting meโฆ youโre just playing.โ
Leans in until his lips are brushing yours without touching โ pure torture.
โNaughty. Iโll remember this.โ
Then he finally kisses you so deep and controlled you forget your own name.
๐ฆ๐ฌ๐๐จ๐ฆ
You dodge. His lips miss by a millimeter. The second you dodge, that signature smirk spreads across his face slow, dangerous, and way too amused. Crimson eyes narrow.
โOh? My little kitten wants to play hard to get tonight?โ
He chuckles low in his throat, crowding you against the nearest wall. One hand braces beside your head, the other lazily tracing your bottom lip with his thumb.
โDodging me only makes me want to ruin you more. You know that, right?โ
He leans in like heโs going for the kiss againโฆ then stops millimeters away.
โBeg nicely and maybe Iโll still let you have it. Or keep running โ I do love the chase.โ
Heโll corner you until youโre the one pulling him in, every single time.
๐๐๐๐๐
You turn your head so the kiss lands on your cheek like itโs โjust friendly.โ He actually freezes for half a second, big purple eyes going wide. Then the playful grin turns wicked.
โAw cโmon, pipsqueakโฆ youโre really gonna dodge your favorite person?โ
He laughs, but thereโs that dark little edge underneath the one that always comes out when heโs jealous or needy. Suddenly heโs scooping you up like you weigh nothing, tossing you over his shoulder, and carrying you straight to the couch.
โYou know dodging me just makes me wanna pin you down and kiss you stupid, right?โ
Drops you on his lap, arms locked around your waist so you canโt escape, nose brushing yours.
โTry that again and Iโm not stopping at kisses, got it?โ
Then heโs peppering your whole face with kisses while muttering โmine, mine, mineโ between each one like the possessive childhood bsf he is.
๐ข๐ง๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ต๐ฐ๐ณ๐ฎ, ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ง๐ญ๐ฐ๐ธ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ด ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฎ | LADS + when you have a nightmare
warnings: hurt + comfort, allusions to 3rd myth (sylus) and my beloved dawnbreaker, hi ๐
synopsis: You were tired of having random, unsatisfying hookups.. and so was your old med school friend, Shoko. After another drinking binge and a bad hookup, Shoko sets you up on a blind date. With nothing to lose and no other excuse, you accept.
turnnoffyourmind
kianamaiart
tangentwithtanner
pixelskylines
kaledo-art
prguitarman
discoholicmusic
