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JEAN KIRSCHTEIN. ꒱
face buried in pussy. ⋆ pumping you with his fingers. ⋆ kissing all over you. ⋆ cuffed ‘n pounding. ⋆ 69ing. ⋆ fondling your boobies through lingerie. ⋆ seashell. ⋆ smack smack smack.
ONYANKOPON. ꒱
sucking him off in the bathtub. ⋆ passionately eating you out ⋆ backshots. ⋆ hitting it from the back. ⋆ missionary. ⋆ cowgirl. ⋆ ten inches deep. ⋆ munching your sloppy folds.
LEVI ACKERMAN. ꒱
missionary. ⋆ choking in a manbeater. ⋆ humping his foot. ⋆ psycho dick sucker. ⋆ tied. ⋆ piston that pussy. ⋆ backshots. ⋆ in the kitchen. ⋆ fingering you. ⋆ bent over. ⋆ rough sex.
ERWIN SMITH. ꒱
inspection. ⋆ experienced older man. ⋆ pretty ass perched atop his knee. ⋆ sweet make out sesh. ⋆ mutual masturbation. ⋆ helping him jerk off. ⋆ missionary.
you prank the aot boys into thinking you find their friends on tinder!
ch: connie, onyankopon, eren, jean, and reiner
𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
connie
you got your phone in your lap while secretly recording connie as he lays next to you on your couch under your fluffy throw blanket that you usually have draped around for decoration.
he’s scrolling through his phone oblivious to the prank you’re about to do on him after doomscrolling on tiktok for hours.
“babe… why is your friend on tinder?”
connie doesn’t even look up at first. his tattooed fingers continues scrolling on his insta feed as if you didn’t just say you were on tinder.
“…what friend?”
“eren”
silence…
his whole demeanor shifts, like instantly. connie presses his tongue against his cheek as he looks up at you in silence.
“lemme see.”
you tilt the phone away just a little in a teasing way not knowing that was the wrong move as he snatches your wrist in a firm but not rough manner.
“nah. show me.”
you start laughing a little while trying to keep it together. “ oh my goddd connie, it’s just—”
“why you even on tinder?” he cuts in while pulling you towards him and staring you down like he’s either about to fuck you up or fuck eren up even if he wasn’t talking to you.
“that’s not the point—”
“whats the point?” he scoffs while already standing up and letting your wrist go. “you think that shits funny? you got me lookin’ stupid.”
he starts to pace with a hand over his mouth, then looks back at you.
“delete that shit. right now.”
you stare at him in silence for a second before laughing in his face. “connie can you calm down? i don’t even have tinder!”
he reaches for your phone again to check for himself only to see your screen now recording you looking back up at him laughing.
“…you lucky,” he mutters while throwing your phone on your lap as his hand grips the back of your neck to pull you into a quick kiss.
“but don’t ever play like that again.”
onyankopon
“i found your friend on tinder.”
he doesn’t react immediately but just looks at you with a raised eyebrow from across the kitchen island as he stops eating the strawberries you cut up for him before you started recording.
then he looks at your phone.
then back at you.
“…why do you have tinder?”
he was too calm for your liking.
you smile. “just saw—”
he holds his hand out.
“phone.”
you hesitate as you still try your best to record his reaction. “im using it?”
he raises his eyebrow again before tapping his fingers against his still held out palm, waiting.
“…phone.”
you start giggling at your boyfriend’s serious reaction knowing his mind is probably racing behind that calm demeanor. “it’s a prank—”
“mhm. i’m not asking ma.”
“ony—”
“you think i care about a joke?”
ony walks around the kitchen island and you try to run away from your boyfriend but he grabs you by your arm before you can escape as he pulls you into his chest.
caging you with one muscular arm, he grabs your face with the other. “i know you not tryna play them type of jokes with me mama” he says with a slight grin.
you look up at him with puckered lips as his fingers squeeze your cheeks tightly. “you didn’t even react—”
“i did react,” he says simply. “just not the way you wanted.”
then he leans closer to give you a peck on your puckered lips.
“but don’t be download dating apps as a joke. that’s unnecessary.” he says as he stares you down.
“…and if my friend is on tinder, that’s his business.”
then he kisses you slightly again.
“…but you? not yours.”
eren
he’s laid out on your bed with his long hair messy and sprawled out on your silk pink pillows. his rings glint under the fairy lights surrounding your bed.
you’re laying on his chest pretending to record yourself but making sure to catch his face in the background.
“eren… i just found your friend on tinder.”
“…okay.”
no reaction. not even a blink as he continues to watch show he decided to put on.
you blink as your lashes flutter in confusion. “…okay??”
he shifts under you, still watching tv. “what you want me to do about it?”
you try not to cuss him out but give him a second chance. “i mean… i was on tinder and—”
that’s when his focus shifts to you as he raises a hand to grab your phone with no hesitation only to see himself staring back at him.
silence.
you lift yourself up from eren’s chest and stare at him in disappointment.
“yeah…took you a while to catch on. that’s actually crazy ren.”
he locks your phone and exhales through his nose while leaning back again like he doesn’t care.
“yeah. don’t do that.”
you glare at him and slap him on his chest as you get off the bed. “ugh, you’re such a boy eren,”
“maybe i should download tinder since you can’t seem to notice it right in your face!” you yell as you walk out the room and straight to the kitchen to get a needed shot of some type of liquor after that.
jean
you’re sitting on jeans bed as he plays whatever game gets him upset after every match. you’re phone is recording from your lap as you call his name.
“jeanie, i found armin on tinder—”
his fingers stop moving on his controller as he turns to look at you with a look that’s mixed with confusion and disbelief. “you were on tinder??”
he’s quick to stand and set down his controller on his desk as he starts pacing. already stressed.
“are you serious right now? like actually serious? you downloaded tinder? for what??”
“jeanie i was just trying to tell you i seen ar—”
“no, no, no– don’t ‘jeanie’ me!” he yells at you like you just committed a crime. “why would you even have it??”
you try to hold back your laugh from the distraught look on his face but a giggle manages to escape and now he looks offended.
“this isn’t funny!”
“it is–”
“it’s not!” he groans while running his hands through his hair. “so what, you just browsing now??”
“i don’t even look like someone you find off tinder?!” he adds, now fully spiraling at this point.
“it’s a joke!” you finally manage to get in between his continuous rant about tinder men.
he freezes mid pacing while staring you down.
“…you’re lying.”
you show him your recording phone with a giggle as you stand up to stand in front of him and grab his arm.
then folds his arms while turning away dramatically.
“wow.”
“jean–”
“wow. so you just like stressing me out for fun now.”
he sits back down at his desk while pouting hard and grabbing his controller.
“…i’m not talking to you for the rest of the day.”
not even a full two minutes later he glances at you.
“…you really don’t have it?”
reiner
you’re making dinner for you reiner when a joke you seen on tiktok pops into your head. you know reiner isn’t on social media as much so he wouldn’t get the reference.
what’s the harm in seeing his reaction anyways? as you stir the chicken and dumplings in the pot, you casually bring it up. “hun, the other day i seen annie on tinder.”
he frowns immediately as he stops setting the table.
“…what’s tinder?”
you pause as you slightly shrug. “…a dating app.”
now he looks even more confused.
“…so you were on a dating app?”
you shrug again to keep yourself from breaking character as you feel his eyes burning into the side of your head. “not really but i seen annie and i just thought it was funny.”
“what do you mean ‘not really’? why would you even download a dating app?” he asks with genuine concern as he moves closer. “are you unhappy?”
“no–”
“do you want to meet other people?” he continues rambling in the most sincere way possible. “because we can talk about that, i just–”
“reiner it’s a joke, hun!”
he stops mid sentence and stares at you.
“…oh.”
he nods slowly as he closes the distance between you two, making you drop your spoon on the counter to give your grizzly husband a hug.
“…okay.”
“still delete it.”
“i don’t have it!”
“good. keep it that way.”
he bends down to engulf your lips as he kisses you while squeezing a little too tight.
“…i don’t like the idea of you being on something like that.” he mumbles against your lips, not really pulling away.
you smile against your connected lips and give him another kiss as you rub his shoulders.
⟣ “best friend” jean that insisted on you two moving in together since you “already spend half your time at his place anyway.”
⟣ “best friend” jean that makes sure to be half naked all summer, and teases you when you stare at him—not that he minds tho, he makes sure to flex for your eyes only.
⟣ “best friend” jean that’s always cuddling with you, an arm wrapped around your waist, face deep into your breasts, mumbling about how comfortable it is; and he loves how you just let him.
⟣ “best friend” jean that somehow is always touching you, an arm wrapped around your shoulders when grocery shopping, a hand on your thigh when driving, your hand in his when going out with friends. that’s just who he is tho, it’s his love language, right?
⟣ “best friend” jean that never denies when someone says you two look like a couple. he encourages it.
⟣ “best friend” jean that gets so jealous and territorial with some of your friends, he hates the fact you have other close male friends besides him.
⟣ “best friend” jean that kisses you in ways no normal best friend does: your knuckles, your shoulder, your cheek, your forehead, your neck. you name it.
⟣ “best friend” jean that always talks bad about your dates, and every time makes you dump them because he convinces you they’re bad guys.
⟣ “best friend” jean that’s always doing couple stuff with you: matching keychains, clothes, jewelry; going on trips alone, buying you stuff, inviting you out, spending valentines or holidays together, meeting each other’s families, taking care of you, etc. you didn’t notice it until someone pointed it out, but he says that’s just what good best friends do.
⟣ “best friend” jean that gets possessive over you, your time, your texts, your laugh; he even gets mad when you play your favorite duo game with someone else—and it takes hours for him to stop being mad at you, maybe a couple cuddles later too.
⟣ “best friend” jean that always says “i love you.” before he leaves or when he hangs up a call, and he makes sure you say it back.
⟣ “best friend” jean that will never admit his true feelings for you as long as you’re still his painfully oblivious best friend.
