To Kill a Dungeon Master

Too Ace to Live, Too Bi to Die Bi Aro Male Cis /he/his/him

[fairycosmos]

personally im a weather talk kind of girl well because if it’s super windy that’s big news if it’s sunny the worlds more awake if it’s rainy we are all in a soup eating kind of mood. these are good observations

[susansontag]

a core theme a surprising amount of people miss in kiki’s delivery service is the ambivalence between tradition and modernity. kiki is a folkloric character, a witch who is entrenched in not only the magic of a past mythical time but who is deeply embedded in customs and traditions. she leaves home at the pre-ordained time for her people, dressed in traditional garb, with the illusion that she will find a neat spot in a new town and bring charm and magic to the locals.

but she is entirely out-of-step with basically everything around her as soon as she arrives: she can’t navigate the traffic with her (handed-down) broom, almost causing a car accident; she envies her fashionable peers dressed in the latest fashions and feels self-conscious; everyone is perplexed, rather than enchanted, to see her. they seem vaguely to have heard of witches but quickly go back about their busy day walking down the busy modern streets. almost a total contrast to kiki’s rural, traditional town (the rural being paired with traditionalism and custom vs the urban city being the site of modernity and emerging technology etc, very classic choice). she gets a place to stay based entirely off the kindness of a stranger; no one feels they owe her anything simply due to her being a witch and this leaving the nest to offer her services elsewhere being what she’s meant to do.

no wonder kiki wonders where she will find her place in this new world that is not at all what she’d expected. people always point out how kiki’s delivery service offers us a portrait of depression, especially in the context of losing passion for something one loves, especially after it’s made one’s job. but this angle of tradition vs modernity feels important to miss, because it’s undoubtedly one of the fundamental factors behind kiki’s eventual dissatisfaction: what does she, with her magic and traditions, have to offer this new, emerging technological world?

no one has made a place for her here. she dresses differently, is unaccustomed to how those her age behave, and her most fundamental and magical gift – flight – is no longer an extraordinary practice reserved for those of myths and legend; hasn’t she seen the fantastic new airship! she is invited to take a ride on it at one point and declines. 

if I remember correctly this is one of the last events that takes place before her fall into depression, a portion of the film characterised by kiki losing her ability to fly (and thus her magic). if even this doesn’t amount to much in this new reality, what does she have to offer? what makes her unique and worthy? the answer to this question is down to interpretation I suppose, though I’m guessing kiki realises she just has herself to offer. her customers like her, they return to ask her for favours and work because she is personable and good at what she does. she can’t offer them something fantastical and extraordinary anymore, but hopefully she herself is enough. and I think those feelings are also very potent for anyone who has struggled with feelings of lack of self-worth and purpose in their lives, just as much as getting tired of something you used to love. what about when the world gets tired of you? what do you do then, when life moves on without you?

[ampervadasz]

Unmute !

[hundredacreworks]

R O U X !

[impishglee]

"Ah! I just had the best massage!"

"Oh? Where'd you get it?"

"Spirits and Such Consulting."

"Eh? Seriously? I never took you for the type to believe in that kind of thing."

"Oh, I don't. The dude is a total fraud but he's a miracle worker with neck and shoulder pain, you just have to tell him it's ghosts."

"What."

"Yeah, it's just this shady guy who works with his nephew or little cousin or something. Sometimes there are some other kids there too, maybe he's a babysitter for his siblings? Dunno. But he'll basically do anything if you blame spirits. One time I got him to change my tires and groom my dog. Weird guy but surprisingly competent."

[peniswakt-deactivated20210717]

golf sucks but mini golf is fucking awesome....truly one of life's great paradoxes

[peniswakt-deactivated20210717]

golf:

wastes crazy amounts of space and water

soul-crushingly boring

extremely frustrating to all but the highest level of players (most golfers will never even shoot par)

prohibitively expensive (golf clubs are very costly and one round of golf can cost $100+)

mini golf:

18 holes will fit into an area the size of a small park; most courses use astroturf, which doesn't even require water

a fun game of skill to challenge your friends to

easy to get into, but difficult to master

cheap (you and your friends can probably play for like, $20)

BONUS: cool obstacles and gimmicks (windmills, water features, secret holes, etc.)

[creekfiend]

Golf: completely fucking silent practically on pain of death

Mini golf: dunking on ppl while theyre taking a shot is pretty much required

[happifying-things]

[funnytwittertweets]

[maximumsunshine]

Let me get this straight because I’ve only seen memes and am piecing this together as i go, but i think i figured out what’s happening.

Tumblr is advertising the tumblr app, on the tumblr app, using a photo of a guy in a Pikachu cosplay, because that’s what they think it will take to successfully sell this app, to people whom already use it?

But now the ball shaving ad is gone? Or is that one still in the mix?

[makoredeyes]

[makoredeyes]

It’s real and your timing was uncanny

[maximumsunshine]

Ok. Why is tumblr advertising tumblr on tumblr though? What happens when you click the ad?

[maximumsunshine]

*sigh*

I suppose shit like this is why tumblr gave us the option to turn ads back on. Hold on. I’ll be back after i experiment.

[maximumsunshine]

I’m getting plenty of ads. Real actual ads. Mattress firm. Burger King. Walmart. Actual ads. No weird Pikachu man. What is even going on here? Is he just a very infrequent ad? Is he a tumblr ploy by @staff to get those of us whom pay to be ads free to turn on ads so we can see him? Is he am actual facts ad for ads free tumblr and already being ads free means you don’t get the ads free tumblr ad? I have more questions, not fewer!

[makoredeyes]

I CLICKED THE LINK And

I’m

[desasterdan]

The weirdest part is, when you click on the ad from someone who reblogged it, it sends you to a blog with just the word ‘help’ on it

[maximumsunshine]

What?!? No. What??!

[jordisstigander]

THERE’S LORE????

[jordisstigander]

Okay, so I just spent five minutes scrolling furiously until I found the stupid Pikachu man ad so I could click on it. I was dreading the possibility that this was fake.

ALT

IT ISN’T

I had already clicked the ad. I decided to click the links.

The first link takes you to the trending page.

The second takes you to the underwater girlfriend page on best of reblogs.

The third is a trash panda on dank memes.

The fourth is the horse plinko tag.

I…can’t believe that this was here the whole time. How hard do you think is was for @staff to watch us complain and not say anything?

[maximumsunshine]

I pay tumblr 5$ a month and thus never ever have to see ads whether I’m on browser or app, unless i go in and turn them back on. So my means of learning about Pikachu man was from memes suddenly showing up on my dash one day. So I’ve sort of just been piecing this together as I go. I just think it’s so funny though that most of tumblr saw the ad and y'all are so well trained to never ever ever click on ads, that no one had apparently thought to click the ad to figure out what the heck Pikachu man was trying to sell. Which I’m so proud of y'all! But we sincerely almost let Pikachu man come and go without this bizarrely delightful discovery.

[madame-serpentine]

holy shit

[tabloidsores]

Me? Oh uh, yeah man I'm just searching for all seven shards of the crimson knife so I can reforge it, 'cause it's like the only knife that can peirce the scales of the God-Serpent. But yeah this tech startup gig you're working with sounds cool. They're doing crazy stuff with web 3.0 and all. Yeah no man that sounds like a big undertaking, but that's got a lot of potential. I'll definitely invest in your company when I can it's just that each shard of the crimson knife poses a task or trial more perilous than the last so I don't know when I'll have the time. Definitely will check the site out though

[fuckyeafakewords]

I think the biggest problem plaguing society today is that my favorite piece of media is the private dnd campaign I am currently in & there is no fandom for it, so I cannot be constantly consuming content about it. This is the greatest tragedy I can imagine. no i will not make a podcast.

[evilvarric666-archive]

A toxic trait of mine is that sometimes when dragon age is going on about how many people died in the Chantry explosion my first thought is "it was just Hightown"

[evilvarric666-archive]

"you're laughing. An anarchist blew up a megachurch in the richy-rich mcmansion part of town, and you think it's funny." I mean, a little bit.

[veeranger]

furthermore i truly believe you should eat a meal before making any big choices, confrontations, vents, etc. i promise 100% of the time you will feel better and more balanced with food in your stomach. you should never do anything that will have consequences on anything less than a full stomach

[veeranger]

i want to kiss you on the lips for 1) saying orc instead of hobbit and 2) being like the only person out of 6k people to gender me correctly

[rhaenyratheconqueror]

[weaver-z]

I’m going to say it. The (word in parentheses) meme is way better for tone indication than tone indicators

[weaver-z]

[anarch0possum]

[sawasawako-archived]

and when chidi anagonye said “i argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. simply put, we are not in this alone”

[mexicancat-girl]

There’s apparently a short one-shot manga called “I’m the Main Character of a Harem Manga, but I’m Gay So Every Day Is Hell for Me” that parodies the harem genre and tbh I’m gonna read it for the title alone.

The title feels like something I’d see in a text post online and I think that’s beautiful.

[mexicancat-girl]

THIS IS BARELY THE SECOND PAGE AND IM DYING

[abortionado]

MYTH: Americans set off fireworks on the 4th of July, in honor of our Independence Day

FACT: Americans set off fireworks from approximately June 20th—July 20th, for no reason other than this is the time of year that you can literally buy them at any grocery store