tolkien crack week @tolkiencrackweek - Tumblr Blog

I can't believe I missed Tolkien Crack Week, but I bring you an offering of: Feanor is obsessed with þorn. Everyone won't let him use his þorn. Melkor steals his þorn and he swears an unbreakable oath to get it back because he needs something to jack off to now that Nerdanel left him!

crack content, indeed

#hehehe #nsfw #fantasychica37

@crabs

dragons have the best tea parties because they make sure the tea never gets cold!

(inspiration under cut)

@tolkiencrackweek day 6

Keep reading

#tcw20 #smaug

halfelven

People who celebrate their dead relative’s birthdays are annoying.

Fuck this post and happy birthday, Bilbo!

I just love how Frodo refused to go into mourning. Everyone was like face it, Frodo, Bilbo’s dead. Frodo’s like no I know him better than that.

Bilbo’s not dead and you can come eat free food at his birthday parties if you proclaim it publicly, Frodo declares, as he corrupts a small circle of cousins for the fun of it

@tolkiencrackweek day 5

thanks to @gaolcrowofmandos and @avery-foxglove for encouraging this

#bilbo #frodo #tcw20 #day 5

halfelven

okay but what if Legolas had snapchat and went off on the Noldor

@tolkiencrackweek day 4

#tcw20 #legolas #day 4

dovahkaate

B6 and A3 maedhros uwu

Second one is watching the C’s mischief from the other asks going down

@tolkiencrackweek

#maedhros #tcw20

nocompromise-noregrets

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Written for @writersmonth day 19, prompt “deaging”, for the lovely @eol who prompted me for little Thranduil when I couldn’t think what to write earlier. Thank you SO much! <3333 This is very silly, a little bit angsty, ludicrously fluffy, and I know @tolkiencrackweek is over but perhaps this might fit there as well…

Rating: G | No Archive Warnings Apply (except that little Thranduil is probably criminally cute)

Relationships: Bard/Thranduil, Thranduil & the Bardlings

Characters: Thranduil, Bard, Sigrid, Tilda, Sauron

Summary: Thranduil takes Bard, Sigrid and Tilda for a picnic in the forest. The sorcerer of Dol Guldur sees an opportunity to have a little fun and teach the Elvenking a lesson.

#bard #thranduil #tcw20

maglor-still-lives

Absolute inspiration struck at midnight, so anyway, here’s what Fingolfin flew before the gates of Angband (based on a real battle flag!)

#this could go here #tcw20 #fingolfin

dovahkaate

aaaa your art is so good!!! may i request finrod and B6?? 🥺🥺🥺

Thank you! 🥰🥰

@tolkiencrackweek

#finrod #tcw20

witchkings

Mairon’s Infamous Cat

A day late for @tolkiencrackweek, but my friend @eol encouraged me to post anyway (thanks for that <3).

Prompt: Modern AU Angbang in which Melkor is afraid of spiders. Hope you enjoy :)

Read on AO3

„I thought you’d never agree to come,“ Mairon said, pulling Melkor through the front door of his apartment complex by the sleeve. „We’ve been dating for what now?“

„You would know better than me,“ Melkor said and eyed the foyer with suspicion. It was clean at least, but the beige tiles were from the last decade and the elevator groaned dangerously when Mairon pressed the button to call it.

„Five months, three weeks, and you haven’t been over to my place once.“

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#melkor #angbang #mairon #tcw20