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btw you should make sure to spend the infinite cycle of life, death, and rebirth with a bestie. it’s called ouroboros not myoboros

demonius-darkblade

I hear being kind is punk but is it ska? Is being kind ska? I don't care about being kind unless it's ska.

teaboot

Names that are normal for old people but weird when you're a baby:

Bartholomew

Dolores

Norman

Harold

Magnolia

Names that are normal for babies but weird when you're old:

Maddison

Tanner

Skylar

Mckenzie

Logan

Names that are normal for old people and normal for babies:

Elizabeth

Mary

Michael

Finnegan

Peter

Names that are weird when you're a baby and weird when you're old:

Radish

Kerosene

Australopithecus

Anthill

Hegemony

Names that are weird when you're normal:

Balthazar

Romulus

Clandestia

Persephone

Kremulon

Names that are normal when you're weird:

Al

real-language-facts

a man is being executed in lego city.

a man has fallen into the river at lego city bridge. a man is swimming through the river in lego city and trudging through nature and reaching out to hug his beautiful lego wife.

a man has been dead all along in lego city

diosapate

jeremy fragrance could do lestat

catharticscream

Remember in 2010 when Taio Cruz said "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes"? I appreciated his restraint. You can't just throw your hands up in the air whenever. There's a time and a place, and that time was 2010, and the place was the club.

tatzelwurming

i took a drug test and tested positive for hummus #fuck

mparamu-lu-sicilianu

facìa nu test pâ droga e fu pusitivu pi l'hummus #cazzu

scorchroots

I've never loved anyone as much as I love Ursula Le Guin

#shoutout making things up #and lying

lesbian-stick-handling

Interviews with hockey players are fantastic, because it is a complex game that can be spoken about at length, but during the intermission they'll find the Wettest player imaginable on the losing team and for thirty seconds they'll ask them things like "what do you need to do to get more pucks in the net?" And the player (panting, haunted behind the eyes) says something like "well, we've got to get them in there"

slimegargoyle

the aquarium said you are NOTHING compared to an eel

vrabia

ambitious indie project this, surprise box-office hit that, iron lung (production budget: $3mil) is the 'someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this, my family is dying' tweet.

vrabia

set construction: $800

cast & crew wages: $1,200 + uber eats

fake blood (assuming generous discount on bulk purchase): $2,000,000 i am so not kidding i did the math this is nuts

editing: average adult body-weight equivalent in monster energy drinks

vrabia

update when markiplier announced he's producing the dvd/blu-ray himself i was like cool he's personally supervising the process and then he was like no i mean i'm making them myself at my house and i imagined some kind of complicated gargantuan contraption dutifully chugging along 24/7 blowing up this man's electricity bill and then he was like

anyway if you buy an iron lung dvd/blu-ray: it was made on a printer-sized machine. at markiplier's house.

avianavii

aborted space whale voice: waooooöo

too-mny-bones

this is how we resolve the duck duck goose vs duck duck gray duck dilemma

dizzyghoast

i think its funny how if you imagine something scary enough your brain starts treating it like its real and out to get you. its really cool and not annoying at all

dizzyghoast

someone: i made up a guy called the Scary Getter! He's real spooky when he tries to getter you!

me: wow thats scary.....the Scary Getter.....what if hes real....what if he getters me???

dizzyghoast

gonna start reblogging this every time i start worrying about about the Scary Getter