The Grape Soda Pin Dorqs

Hello, welcome to my tumblr! It consists of little snippets of my random thoughts. I hope it entertains you or perhaps you just find something that interests you. Enjoy! ~Danya

[cagaderamental]

[megheadmed]

You need.. you need to unmute…

[cobaltdays-deactivated20210208]

I’ve waited too long to find this gem again!

[colombian-jacob-49]

This is perfection 😂

[wehadfacesthen]

I won’t be posting Monday December 17 to protest the imposition of censorship on Tumblr

[whitepeopletwitter]

[lorem64]

I’m so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There’s no chicken in there!

[ankaa-avarshina]

Two words: Raw eggs.

[lorem64]

?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry salmonella or are in anyway unsafe

[ankaa-avarshina]

Don’t ask me, ask them Americans. I’m an Asian just passing the word on

[phantoms-lair]

*deep breath* Though the risk is small, raw eggs can carry samonella.

MORE THREATENINGLY Raw wheat can carry E. Coli. However, if you don’t mind making your own cookie dough, you can easily make it safely.

Take your standard recipe. Omit the eggs. Eggs serve as a binding agent to hold the cookie together. Since we’re eating the dough raw, that’s not needed. Take the flour, put it in a pan and bake it at 350 for 7 minutes. Any E. Coli is now dead.

Just mix the rest of the ingredients together as the recipe is called for and BAM, perfectly safe edible cookie dough.

[crayyola-deactivated20220827]

Thank u so fucking much for this wisdom

[antique-scarecrow]

wait you’re telling my i can get E, Coli just FROM EATING FLOUR straight from the bag???

[kingantlion-deactivated20231130]

Why..why are you eating flour straight from the bag?

[stability]

i literally can’t stop thinking about this video and i lose it every time

[zamzamafterzina]

Lmfao

[noneeyewithleftyork]

okay everything about this video is absolute gold:

the fact that the guy argues via the puppet the entire time

the music

“let’s discuss the contradiction”

the overuse of the word “camera”

the way the puppet goes from trying to placate the guy to actively arguing against the guy and like turning it around on the guy

“youre consciously making a conscious choice”

the fact that by the end the puppet is basically screaming and the music is just. so loud.

“YOURE BREAKING THE CAMERA” as the video abruptly ends

[hemlockes-key]

for anyone who wants to see more stuff like this, you can probably find clips of it on YouTube. it came from a show called “Wonder Showzen” and it’s responsible for these gems, too:

[stingywithmycootiecat]

LMFAOOO THIS VIDEO WILL NEVER NOT BE FUNNYYY 😩😂😂😂

[happydorid]

Museum of Moss 

I started this comic almost a year ago, but finally got around to finishing it! 

[mizeov-old]

I want a feature length movie

[streetkit]

Holy shit this is so good

[blackspy-deactivated20171104]

Apparently how people feel after waking up from naps.

How I feel after waking up from naps.

[bludragongal]

I had a nightmare last night.

I was a reporter.

[upperstories]

This is absolutely amazing. I hope you hold onto this idea.

[flip-this-table]

OMG, YOU TURN THIS INTO A 500 PAGE NOVEL RIGHT NOW. I WOULD READ THE HELL OUT OF THIS.

[bludragongal]

If this gets 20,000 notes I’ll make a Part 2.

[heathens-and-kings]

“I want to speak to a manager,” the middle-aged woman said in her stern I-used-to-be-a-soccer-mom-ten-years-ago voice, looking down at me over the top of her Gucci reading glasses.

A wicked grin split across my face and the gates of Hell opened up behind me, releasing a gust of hot wind that whipped my apron around my body and forced the woman to shield her face. Demons came forth, dancing around in flames with songs of, “She wants to speak to a manager. Did you hear that? She wants to speak to a manager!” before erupting into earsplitting shrieks of laughter, none louder than my own cackling.

I took in the woman’s look of utter horror before my eyes rolled back into my head and I growled,

“I am the manager.”

[owawaaa]

a thing for one of my favorite posts on this site

[humansofnewyork]

“I just finished medical school.  Now I’m heading to residency, which is supposed to be even tougher.  I’ve been working sixteen-hour days.  Then I’m expected to study every night when I get home.  Some of my classmates only sleep three hours per night.  I tried that for a few months during my surgery rotation, but I ended up getting really depressed.  I felt completely depersonalized.  Everything seemed like a dream.  To make matters worse, a lot of the instructors are jerks.  I think they went through hell when they were students, so they feel like they should put us through hell.  On the first day of rotations, my attending physician told me: ‘I’m an asshole, but I’ll make you a better doctor.’  He made fun of me in front of other students.  He put me down in front of patients.  He’d threaten to kick me out every day.  I guess they’re trying to weed people out and make strong doctors.  But they’re just traumatizing people.  They’re making us apathetic.  I got into medicine because I really wanted to make a difference in people’s lives.  But after going through hell, I just don’t care anymore.”

[maisonderriere]

The Onion’s review of Mamma Mia 2 is the only one I need

[jonah-dean]

I feel like this is directed at a specific person. I don’t know who but I hope they got the message.

[yo-its-matt]

It’s directed at Jeremy from CinemaSins and we all fucking know it

[ianwanda]

I think if a murderer wanted to lure me out of my room all they’d have to do is turn off my wifi cause sure as shit I’m gonna go see why it isn’t working

[loki-cat2]

touch my wifi you asshole and i wont be the one whos getting murdered tonight

[mysharona1987]

They are saying with a straight face:

This. Woman. Is. Not. Attractive.

Like, I’m not even a lesbian, but come the fuck on.

[curlsandstems]

Don’t do drugs, ladies and gents. 😂😭😂😭😂😭

[thewanderingnegro-deactivated20]

“Whats your safe word?”

[curlsandstems]

That part had me weak 😂😭😂😭😂😭 

[paninimami]

“You think I’m in pilates?”😭

[trashg0d-deactivated20180217]

“watch ya fingers bootyhole man!!” Lmfaooaoaoaoooo

[justcariii]

Lol i need to be his friend

[southernbitchface]

“Every strong man got a sensitive side”

[h3llraizer]

Lmaooooooooooooooooo

[7thblacksheep-deactivated201907]

“Ooo that’s cute”

[decolonialtheoryandweed]

Bruh I love this dude! Why is he getting arrested and is there a link for us to send money to bail him out?

[shibari-babe-deactivated2018120]

So who here has the skills to make a whole new app, tumblr 2.0, for adult content

[espikvlt]

And please call it Cumblr.

[lipstickdemon]

someone did it lol

[catchymemes]

Chance of a lifetime for an epic trick

The passenger steamer SS Warrimoo was quietly knifing its way through the waters of the mid-Pacific on its way from Vancouver to Australia. The navigator had just finished working out a star fix and brought Captain John DS. Phillips, the result. The Warrimoo’s position was LAT 0º 31’ N and LONG 179 30’ W. The date was 31 December 1899.

“Know what this means?” First Mate Payton broke in, “We’re only a few miles from the intersection of the Equator and the International Date Line”. Captain Phillips was prankish enough to take full advantage of the opportunity for achieving the navigational freak of a lifetime.

He called his navigators to the bridge to check & double check the ship’s position. He changed course slightly so as to bear directly on his mark. Then he adjusted the engine speed.

The calm weather & clear night worked in his favor. At mid-night the SS Warrimoo lay on the Equator at exactly the point where it crossed the International Date Line! The consequences of this bizarre position were many:

The forward part (bow) of the ship was in the Southern Hemisphere & in the middle of summer.

The rear (stern) was in the Northern Hemisphere & in the middle of winter.

The date in the aft part of the ship was 31 December 1899.

In the bow (forward) part it was 1 January 1900.

—

This ship was therefore not only in:

Two different days,

Two different months,

Two different years,

Two different seasons

But in two different centuries - all at the same time!

[welcomedhappiness]

Farewell online privacy

[tikalgirl]

What happened?

[welcomedhappiness]

Trump happened.

[pizzaalle]

just get a VPN?

[earth-ruins]

You can’t just tell people to ‘get a VPN (Virtual Private Network)’. Buying a VPN is like buying a house. It’s very very important. Having no VPN or having a ‘wrong’ one can seriously damage your life. Especially for Americans because their privacy laws are garbage. I am going to try explain why you should get a VPN but bare with me, I am from Germany and my English is far from perfect. 

Let’s start with a simple test. Click this link here: https://whatismyipaddress.com/ It will tell your IP adres, your ISP (internet service provider), and your location. The location might not be very accurate, but then again, it’s just a simple website. Imagine what the government can do!

So basically, everyone can find out where you live. But there is more danger. Your ISP. Your ISP logs your every move online and they are required to keep it in case the government wants access to it (or if a 3rd party wants to buy your data (yikes). They have everything. What websites you visit. How long you stay on a website. What you download. Your search terms. European laws are more subtle on this but if you are from the US you are #@*#&, especially because Trump doesn’t support the open internet. It’s scary but maybe in the future you can’t get a job because the recruiter knows your searched on ‘how to deal with depression’ or anythings else that’s supposed to be private because it’s your f*cking right. Or you get a $100k fine because you pirated a movie 15 years ago. You need a VPN. You’re dumb for not using one. but what does a VPN do?

A VPN encrypts all your data so if it were be intercepted no one can ‘crack the code’ and damage your privacy. 

Usually being online goes like this (simplified): Your computer —-> ISP (—–> keeps data —–> sells it)

But with a VPN it goes like: Your computer —–> VPN (encrypts data)—–> ISP (ISP can’t see shit)

Furthermore, a VPN hides your IP address and location by giving you another IP address located in Spain for example (you can often choose from a list and change as many times as you want).  

Now that you know why you should get a VPN and what is does it is important to educate yourself because people often choose the wrong VPN. VPN providers are also businesses and have to obey the law. If you choose a VPN provider located in the US then you are throwing your money away because the laws in the US shits on your privacy. If the US gov wants the provider to give all their logs they have to obey.  The ISP  still can’t see what you are doing online and sell your data but the US gov can interfere with your VPN provider so NEVER CHOOSE A PROVIDER LOCATED IN THE US. 

I just wanted to make that very clear so my followers don’t buy false security.

There is still more danger!  Who says your VPN provider isn’t selling your data? You need to check their logging policy. Do they keep logs? If yes, what for? For how long do they keep them? Tip: Choose a provider who doesn’t keep logs

More about law  The US is part of the Five Eyes program (the worst):  

The Five Eyes, often abbreviated as FVEY, is an intelligence alliance comprising Australia, Canada, New Zealand, the United Kingdom and the United States. These countries are bound by the multilateral UKUSA Agreement, a treaty for joint cooperation in signals intelligence (source)

There is also a Nine Eyes (bit better) and Fourteen Eyes Program (better).  You don’t want a VPN provider who is located in one the Five Eyes countries.  If you had to choose go for a provider located in a country that’s part of the Fourteen Eyes Program or even better, go for a country that isn’t part of any program! 

I know this is a shitty explanation and please pardon my english but now it’s time to do your own research. Take your privacy seriously. Maybe WWIII breaks out and you get killed for liking the ‘wrong’ FB-page.  

Go to this website: https://thatoneprivacysite.net/simple-vpn-comparison-chart/

Make sure that your future VPN provider both has green boxes for Privacy Jurisdiction and Privacy Logging. 

I recommend ovpn.se and trust.zone. ovpn is located in Sweden so they are part of the 14 Eyes Program and they keep minimal logs. Their business ethics, however, are alright. 

Trustzone is located in the Seychelles. No country can interfere and their privacy jurisdiction is the best you can get. The US want your data but needs to get it from Trustzone? The Seychelles will simply give them the finger and wave them goodbye. However, this makes this provider very appealing for people who torrent and criminals because they keep no logs (and that is how it shoud be) Also,  there are almost no marketing efforts so this provider is one the cheapest)

Also, often providers such as ExpressVPN are being called ‘The Best’ on websites about VPNs but know that this is just marketing which also makes those provider more expensive (and they too shit on your privacy)

This must be the worst article you have ever read but please, please take your privacy very seriously.

EDIT: I got many people asking me which provider I use. For those who want to know, I use Trust Zone. They offer a free 3-day trial with no strings attached. But still do your own research! 

[writing-prompt-s]

I am also with Trustzone but I think you forgot to explain one of it’s most important features. It protects you when you are using someone else’s Wi-Fi. If you are at Starbucks and you use their Wi-Fi your privacy is at risk. Anyone with ill intentions could steal your information. Especially if you are using an unsecured Wi-Fi hotspot. With a VPN your data gets encrypted so no one can steal it. 

[rabbittiddy]

Wait, what’s going, on? Did trump destroy internet privacy with a bill or something? Where’s the news? Oh wait, why am I getting visions of Alex Jones and selling water purifiers?

[thecrystalfems]

He hasn’t yet but he says he wants to. And if he is serious about it it would be really easy to do. Since all our data is already recorded, as the person above explained.

[coltrer]

Trump wants more surveillance of Muslim Americans. This in a country where internet privacy is already close to non-existent. 

Trust.Zone has a free trial. Use it. 

btw this post only has 11k notes? That’s quite disappointing for something this important. 

Don’t reblog this post to save a life. Reblog this to protect an entire family!

[imthedoctor12]

@earth-ruins @writing-prompt-s Should I get trustzone for my mobile device?

[writing-prompt-s]

If you use public Wi-Fi, then yes. Which VPN you use is up to you, amigo. Take @earth-ruins advice. Do your own research first. 

[writing-prompt-s]

@elvesfromthedeep​ just brought the current situation in the US to my attention (March 30, 2017). 

Sources

Anger as US internet privacy law scrapped 

Congress just voted to let internet providers sell your browsing history 

To all my friends in the US, please read this entire post. Making everyone aware of VPNs is going to be my mission. Your privacy matters. Please reblog this post.

[greeneyespurpleheart]

Don’t tell me you just wanted to scroll past this. Stop looking at pictures of cats for a moment, okay? Don’t you realize how important this is? This is dangerous! ‘America, the best FREE country in the world’ my ass.

With this new law your ISP can sell your Internet history which could include passwords, usernames, religion, credit card numbers, race and much more to the highest bidder. So here is what I want you to do. You are going to read the whole thing and before you think ’this is so important. Let me reblog this real quick and go back to admiring cats again-’ NO! Don’t reblog this. Take action first. Then reblog. Sign up for a free trial! Trust.Zone offers one (here). Yes. It might be difficult to set up a VPN for some people. But is that going to stop you from protecting yourself and your family? 30 minutes. 30 minutes is all that it takes. 5 if you know how to install software. The problem with some of you is that you see ‘difficult’ as something negative. I want you to see difficult differently. I need you to push through this stuff. You are going to protect yourself. There is nothing negative about that. VPNs are fun and costsaving too! A VPN bypasses geographical restrictions so you can access websites you normally can’t or you could start Netflix’s one month free trial over and over again- forever. And it’s legal! (unless you use it to buy weapons etc.,) Don’t tell yourself that you are too tired and that you will do this tomorrow. Because that isn’t going to happen and you know it. You have to do this right now. You only have to click on it. Don’t let this/shit/life just happen to you. Take yourself seriously. Get a VPN.

Privacy is not a privilege, it’s a fundamental human right

[tthatonefangirl-deactivated2019]

Ok sorry that it’s so freaking long and also sorry for the language, but this is extremely important. Please reblog!

[li-ionsandtigersandbears]

Reblogging again bc this is important

[shosheika-blog]

Right now they’re having a black friday sale! 75% off!!

[womenintheirwebs-archived]

the one problem i have with people my age and younger is that a lot of us do not have hands on hobbies. like i have spoken to so many people my age who go to work, go to school and then fuck around on their phone/computer for hours and then ???????? like no wonder ur depressed and have low confidence in urself. u need to get ur hands on something, feed those dopamine receptors! learn how to play guitar, garden, scrapbook, fucking make model trains. i don’t give a shit, MAKE SOMETHING!!

it feels better than drugs when i finish making a thing—and then show it off or gift it.

and then so people my age say to me ‘well—i can’t draw/paint/knit/etc. like you can. my stuff would be terrible.’ yeah, well duh—a part of developing skill is sucking at something and then practicing it over and over and over again until you suck less. u’ll have a hard time feeling lonely or bored when you can’t stop thinking abt a technique you want to try or something you want to make for someone else. making things has SAVED MY LIFE. it gave me a reason to keep living day after day when i wanted to die.

making things have improved my generational relationships (when i worked for the newspaper i would talk to customers abt jamming recipes or cross-stitch, one of my grandmas always gives me pattern books and tell me abt when she knitted things for mom, my other grandma is giving me a wedding quilt that HER grandma gave her 50 years ago because she knows i will appreciate it). it also got me likeminded friends who also make things.

take a ceramics class! pick up water colors, bake cakes! learn to work on cars! make soap. DO SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE STARING AT A SCREEN.

[biofomission]

The 40 hour work week deprives people of the energy to do anything recreational or self improving which is why everyone is stressed and depressed