Cause of Death: Blasted

Calloway | 26 | they/them | I'm into Ace Attorney, Batfam, and whatever else catches my eye | header by @dcarveledits | icon by @pokemonprideflags | venmo: calstar

[viralfrog]

[cameoamalthea]

Things to do with your twin

[penandinkprincess]

truly few things instantly put me in a bad mood more than humidity

WHY is the fucking AIR out here TOUCHING ME

get OFF

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

so one of my professors was just telling us a story about a time he was helping respond to a rabies outbreak and after taking blood from an animal he dropped the syringe and it went through his glove and stabbed him and now I’m trying to decide what is the best way to show a pokemon screenshot to a professor because I NEED him to see this

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

FOUND IT. Just so you know I showed him the image and he laughed really hard so it was good.

[byjove]

I can’t remember if I told you guys this but my grandpa paid a guy to put up a rock retaining wall in the backyard when my grandparents moved into their house in 1966. They live at the bottom of a mountain. The wall finally collapsed this year and my grandfather with dementia was PISSED OFFFFFF and he wanted so badly to call the guy who did it and chew him out for doing a bad job. My grandma is trying to explain that the wall lasted 60 years and the guy who did the work is probably dead and it TURNS OUT HE IS STILL ALIVE. Now we’re worried grandpa is going to get through to him (small town) and we’re going to see two 85 year old men come to blows over a rock wall that has been there since the mid-60s. My grandpa is a scrapper, he’s been to jail over a bar fight, the possibility that he WOULD fight this guy is high.

To top it off? The stone mason is the only person in town with one arm so grandpa would definitely recognize him if he saw him. If that is your grandpa, please protect him from my grandpa.

[oneheadtoanother]

[tachyon-log]

(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,

[fishmech]

inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.

[bunniope]

can we focus on the gnome for a second

[bunniope]

wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat

[ladyofspoons]

these are the people i have to share a highway with

[pangur-and-grim]

trying to couch nap but they’re observing me

[madicham]

I wanted to draw them

[my-artblog-is-ssjumi]

their shapes are compelling

[alpa-the-internet-cowboy]

are we simplifying them or something

[kushblazer666]

[flowercrownsylveon]

[benjacksonstanaccount]

I'm sorry but this is just too funny not to put here (not my screenshot)

[wordswithkittywitch]

Well, someone's messed with the timeline!

[the-cheshire-cat-grin]

Lil nas x coming back during pride month to tell us hes been taking care of his physical and mental health, finishing rehab and getting treatment for bipolar disorder, and telling us that he is excited to not only make new music but also just to live his life???? And during mens mental health awareness month????? Oh i missed him bad

[cloudabserk]

just watched an interview with james ortiz (rocky’s puppeteer) where he’s like “they were torturing ryan gosling for this movie. it was killing him. he was developing isolation sickness in real life from being the only actor on set for 6 months. i needed to be there for him even when rocky wasn’t in frame to serve as his guiding light and the sole thread tethering him to the concept of love. i was kneeling at the altar” and what

[cloudabserk]

and then in ryan goslings interviews he’s like “i was struggling in the depths of hell. until a beautiful puppeteer angel lifted me up out of the darkness and saved me so completely and understood the character so well we had to make him play the role for real”

[cloudabserk]

what

[cerebrobullet]

now, i do enjoy the "grace breaks his glasses and is despondent because it's his only pair" head canons because i love drama and misery, but also this is NASA. They sent him up there with like ten extra pairs because a) it's NASA and b) everyone fucking saw how Grace treated his glasses. The original redundancy plan probably called for like 5 pairs but then Stratt took one look at that and was "absolutely not, he's a fucking menace double that immediately"

[avoid-avoidance]

as soon as those spare pairs run out, gonna have to call this man Dotor aptain Ryland Grae because he won’t be able to fuckin C

[asimovsideburns]

and he’s eventually going to need a new prescription, and you know the hail mary was not designed with that in mind because he wasn’t supposed to live long enough need a new prescription

can you imagine the process of getting your eyes diagnosed and setting up the equipment to properly grind and shape lenses

on a planet of aliens that can’t fucking see

[gayleafpool]

sometimes i think love triangles should be resolved by polyamory but badly like everyone’s still mad

[beardedmrbean]

[boomer-mythology-destroyer]

[cali]

soundscape of young green martian playing with pvc pipes

[dralphabet]

[dehydratedlydia]

I love this video so much it brings me so much joy every time it crosses my dash again

[catasters]

[catsithkelpie]

I cannot describe how much I laughed at this.

Sound is VERY important.

[pukicho]

Should I have the leftover tamale that made me furiously sick yesterday or should I have something else?

[feism]

have the tamale

[pukicho]

Could you guys give your reasoning for choosing the Tamale that gets me sick?

[pukicho]