Cause of Death: Blasted

Calloway | 26 | they/them | I'm into Ace Attorney, Batfam, and whatever else catches my eye | header by @dcarveledits | icon by @pokemonprideflags | venmo: calstar

[homoidioticus]

Commenters praise the girls frugality

[bace-jeleren]

[deathdaydreamm]

I quote song this every day

[ecstasemen]

im developing cataracts in my right eye and ill be getting surgery for it on sunday so art might be paused for a bit next week ...

[butch-witches-deactivated202412]

to help OP out for each day it is healing I will invent a new minion hybrid.

day 1: if a minion and shrek had sex that produced viable offspring

[ecstasemen]

that's okay. you dont need to do that actually

[bogleech]

Does tumblr know about that Papa Johns sauce bottle pissing everyone off on all the other social media?

Its for a good reason but it's kind of also undeniably funny. It really looks like that.

[isabelleaspin]

[hypotheticalpeople]

guy who plays albums on mute, it was never really about sound for him as much as feeling a sense of progression through a series of named durations

[headspace-hotel]

[hangsawoman]

therapist: and what do we say when we feel like this?

me: no live organism can continue to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality

therapist: no

[audible-smiles]

the worst part of summer is that people get sooo comfortable expressing their disgust at having to see other people’s bodies. they’re always complaining about wrinkly old men at the nude hot springs or fat women in bikinis at the beach. I hate that shit. if you’re not capable of being normal about bodies you personally don’t find attractive, just turn your head to look at something else! and if you’re not smart enough to do that, then at least do the rest of us the courtesy of suffering in silence, because we don’t wanna hear your weird comments. thanks.

[yoshippipi]

The Protector

[anistarrose]

[ID: art of Magnus from The Adventure Zone, seen in profile. He's holding up his silver shield with a serious and proud expression, his eyes closed, with a night sky full of constellations shining behind him. Magnus is a light-skinned man with reddish-brown hair and a beard, wearing a red shirt and brown leather armor. End ID.]

[bowlby4]

[viralfrog]

[cameoamalthea]

Things to do with your twin

[penandinkprincess]

truly few things instantly put me in a bad mood more than humidity

WHY is the fucking AIR out here TOUCHING ME

get OFF

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

so one of my professors was just telling us a story about a time he was helping respond to a rabies outbreak and after taking blood from an animal he dropped the syringe and it went through his glove and stabbed him and now I’m trying to decide what is the best way to show a pokemon screenshot to a professor because I NEED him to see this

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

FOUND IT. Just so you know I showed him the image and he laughed really hard so it was good.

[byjove]

I can’t remember if I told you guys this but my grandpa paid a guy to put up a rock retaining wall in the backyard when my grandparents moved into their house in 1966. They live at the bottom of a mountain. The wall finally collapsed this year and my grandfather with dementia was PISSED OFFFFFF and he wanted so badly to call the guy who did it and chew him out for doing a bad job. My grandma is trying to explain that the wall lasted 60 years and the guy who did the work is probably dead and it TURNS OUT HE IS STILL ALIVE. Now we’re worried grandpa is going to get through to him (small town) and we’re going to see two 85 year old men come to blows over a rock wall that has been there since the mid-60s. My grandpa is a scrapper, he’s been to jail over a bar fight, the possibility that he WOULD fight this guy is high.

To top it off? The stone mason is the only person in town with one arm so grandpa would definitely recognize him if he saw him. If that is your grandpa, please protect him from my grandpa.

[oneheadtoanother]

[tachyon-log]

(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,

[fishmech]

inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.

[bunniope]

can we focus on the gnome for a second

[bunniope]

wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat

[ladyofspoons]

these are the people i have to share a highway with

[pangur-and-grim]

trying to couch nap but they’re observing me

[madicham]

I wanted to draw them

[my-artblog-is-ssjumi]

their shapes are compelling

[alpa-the-internet-cowboy]

are we simplifying them or something

[kushblazer666]

[flowercrownsylveon]

[benjacksonstanaccount]

I'm sorry but this is just too funny not to put here (not my screenshot)

[wordswithkittywitch]

Well, someone's messed with the timeline!