[socialmaya]

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

theyer old enough that they used to connect 

[finnglas]

They're older than Florida. The Floridian peninsula is the solidified runoff of the Appalachians that got caught on some coral. It's why we're like this, I think. You don't stand a chance of being normal when you were created by the shed skin of an elder god draping itself over a hollow skeleton. You're always going to be a little Off.

[galladegamer]

[sirfrogsworth]

Well, I'm sold.

[thefrogman]

I keep watching all of these things that are supposed to turn me gay and so far the only tingle was when Captain America bicep-curled a helicopter.

I'll keep trying I guess.

[egberts]

this is so cute and wholesome and I'm dead over it I'm crying

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

This is the exact opposite of hiding coins at the beach for your child with a metal detector

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[acreaturecalledgreed]

i was gonna say it Does have a tail thats what the cord is thats why its called a mouse!!!! and then i remembered most mouses are cordless now and got fucked up bc IT IS A HAMSTER and now immfucked up bc like. technology has advanced so must thay mice have changed species

[acreaturecalledgreed]

it matters to me that you all know i was wizard high when i wrote that

[akaiiros]

this actually is rewiring my brain as we speak

[screamelot]

[lordascapelion]

Holy fuck that’s even more inspirational

[knitmeapony]

[poetry-protest-pornography]

A) I love this Tweeter an irrational amount

B) I mean, yes, be careful with food while camping, but who could possibly anticipate a bear having that kind of restaurant loyalty and GPS?

[bearotonin-international]

[make--it--gayer]

✨ audacity ✨

[sybilius]

"useless gay" jokes are OUT this energy is IN

[antoniettabrandeisova]

Statue of the goddess Aphrodite bathing in the garden of the Reggia di Caserta, Italy.

[amateur]

[corvidiss]

this is a really good point, actually

[memewhore]

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

(Soundwave voice) LAKE SUPERIOR

REPUBLICANS INFERIOR

[qqueenofhades]

Can't believe nobody has added the thrilling sequel:

[imsopopfly]

Hello 911 I just witnessed two entire murders

[blancabitchcraft]

[mornington-the-crescent]

[ach-seal-beag-gearr-deactivated]

*vibrating* it’s the cowboy witch poem it’s the cowboy witch poem it’s the cowboy witch poem

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[ruinedchildhood]

[naamahdarling]

It appears to be spoof comedy and is absolutely hilarious. This is the first three paragraphs:

[whitepeopletwitter]

[tchaikovskaya]

i dont have an emerald green chaise longue and im being so brave about it

[dankmemeuniversity]

[popsunner]

Was just informed by my mom that I do in fact have ADHD and the reason I thought I didn’t was because ever since I was seven whenever I got super energetic my mom would have me go chop wood so now when I’m feeling The ADHD I go chop wood and I thought it was just some sort of routine I started when I was little and wanted to blow off steam

[popsunner]

I’d also like to point out that my sister has a really hard time staying present (I can’t remember the term because we’ve always called it Tethered at my house) and whenever she’s feeling Untethered my mom has her knead bread and make syrup because they’re repetitive and easy things to do that ground her

[popsunner]

Now that I’m thinking about it- my brother has days where he doesn’t talk and doesn’t eat unless he’s prompted, and on those days my mom sits him down in the fish pond in the backyard and plays Mozart and because he’s so used to that being his wake up he always comes back in after like an hour rambling about random things

[popsunner]

Oh yeah and when it rains my mom has a required hour where we all have to go outside and run around and whoever finds the most worms for the garden wins and then we go inside and my mom makes us tea and we watch Studio Ghibli movies

[popsunner]

Wait!!! When one of us has a bad day at school we make a fire in the backyard and roast homemade sausages and my mom tells us stories until we laugh and then she tucks is in bed like we’re five again and sings us songs

[popsunner]

Uh.... wait guys is my mom a witch raising a bunch of fae kids hold on-

[eldritch-eternity]

“I didn’t know I had adhd because my mom gave me such an effective coping mechanism” is such a high bar to clear and she soared over it like a space-plane.