What

[coughloop]

10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board

[fearthefuzzybear]

[swordofazrael1992]

how we feeling

[izzy-hands]

You know, if you could write yourself a little song, you can sing yourself whatever you please. But you can’t, can you?

[botanyshitposts]

scientists in the 1990s, putting a Get More Purple gene attached to a harmless plant virus into an already purple petunia: please get more purple

the petunia, sensing an apparent honest to god Get More Purple Disease, using the previously undiscovered RNAi antiviral ability to shut down all other purple genes along with it just in case: you put VIRUS in petunia? you infect her with the More Purple?? oh! oh! her children shall bloom white! jail for mother, jail for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!

[witchbeef]

me, watching a mobile game ad: you fool. you shit idiot. i would never let the goldfish fall into molten lava.

[thvndermag-deactivated20200419]

[thoughtsoncelluloid]

Parks & Rec, Pretty Little Liars and the Fast & Furious films all exist in the same universe

[itsverybeautifulover-there]

And SCANDAL WTF

[thoughtsoncelluloid]

Oh jeez, SCANDAL….

….and BATTLESHIP too, apparently. It’s a goddamn conspiracy 

[thoughtsoncelluloid]

Oh god. He’s on REVENGE too. How deep does this rabbit-hole go….

[thoughtsoncelluloid]

Oh my god. DEXTER.

[thoughtsoncelluloid]

THE ACTUAL NEWS

[hijinksensue]

I read an interview with this guy (who is a real news anchor), and he said he told his acting agent that he is ONLY interested in parts where he plays a new anchor. This is no coincidence. This is by design. 

[fieldbears]

what is his plan

[kryptonians]

To tell the news

[depsidase]

[gumi-megpoidd]

Oh wow ur right

[disgustinganimals]

Who told you about the mind cow

[ladystarks]

The Dregs | Shadow and Bone (2021)

[damianmcgintleman]

everyone talks about the folgers coffee incest commercial but remember the quizno’s commercial where the guy was fucking the toaster oven?

[mslockheart]

what the fuck

[flyawaymax]

what the fuck

[rose-mcgowan-stan-blog]

a MALE toaster oven

I support their forbidden gay love

[clearlyconfounded]

“Not doin that again that burned”

“We both enjoyed that.”

I’m dying how did this get produced

[suspicious-robot]

He also looks down at his dick when he said it burned

[catchymemes]

[smute]

“you are a lawyer and he is a hamster” is one of the funniest statements ive ever had the pleasure of reading

[tumblairee]

New island entrance 💕

[gratefulfrog]

[s-o-r-i-n]

[starsttuff-blog]

romanticize un-illuminated brown and black eyes. romanticize the way dark eyes look without being blinded by flash. romanticize brown eyes that don’t have streaks of gold and yellow. romanticize black eyes that are so raven it’s hard to distinguish where the iris is. the depth of your dark eyes is enchanting. brown and black eyes draw you in, wrap you up, and leave you wanting more. fall in love with them.

[scarletgiselle]

Idk if this has been done before 😂😂

[dancing-cockroaches]

:(

where did you find a test to do this?

https://www.arealme.com/vocabulary-size-test/en/

[sanctuarysusie]

[tumblairee]