another vine comp with more of my faves that would have made the first one way too long
I’m gonna keep reblogging these until I can fill a museum with their greatness
i honestly think humans are getting funnier
Today's Document
Mike Driver
official daine visual archive
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
will byers stan first human second
hello vonnie

Andulka
ojovivo
Noah Kahan
taylor price

titsay
we're not kids anymore.

if i look back, i am lost

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$LAYYYTER
Three Goblin Art
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

shark vs the universe

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Poland

seen from Sweden

seen from Malaysia

seen from Malaysia

seen from Japan

seen from Türkiye

seen from United States

seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from Canada

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States

seen from Venezuela
seen from Mexico
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
@twistedtk
another vine comp with more of my faves that would have made the first one way too long
I’m gonna keep reblogging these until I can fill a museum with their greatness
i honestly think humans are getting funnier
hm.. today i want to adventure the ocean!!!
here we are in the epipelagic zone!!! nice and warm and blue!!! but let’s go deeper!!!
woah… the mesopelagic zone looks cool… but let’s go even deeper. we can do it
we have arrived at the bathypelagic zone… it doesn’t get deeper… or does it
we have made it to the abyssopelagic zone!!!
hm. it’s really dark. let’s light this place up! just gimme a minute…
Hey, you. You’re finally awake. Walked right into that imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there.
For fucks sake
gamecube was the best designed controller of all time exclusively for the button cluster that gave you easy thumb roll access to all buttons but also gave you the a button as a thumb rest (because it’s the one you press the most) and took into account the frequency with which each button gets pressed in its design rather than doing the stupid diamond design that gives no button priority and rests your thumb in the shitty blank space between buttons
The Diamond Button Layout Is The Bleeding Stump Where Form Cut Function’s Head Off
Publishing for Fun and Profit
So there was a list going around tumblr for a while that made it to my dash of literary journals that accept open submissions (and will pay!), but upon inspection about half of them were closed indefinitely, and I found quite a few other places that looked interesting through further research, so I wanted to post my own list.
I tried to focus on things that paid professional grade (at least 6 cents per word), were friendly to speculative fiction, and specifically encouraged diversity and writing about marginalized groups.
(Please note that as of right now I have never submitted or been published with any of these, so if anyone has experience with them, good or bad, please feel free to message or reblog this with your experiences.)
Speculative Fiction
Strange Horizons — Speculative fiction (broadly defined) with an emphasis on diversity, unusual styles, and stories that address politics in nuanced ways. 8c per word. Up to 10,000 words, under 5,000 preferred. Responds within 40 days. LGBT+ positive.
Fantasy & Science Fiction Magazine — Sci-fi, fantasy, horror, etc. 7-12c per word. Up to 25,000 words. No response times listed.
Asimov’s Science Fiction — Primarily sci-fi but accepts fantasy and surreal fiction, but no high fantasy/sword and sorcery. Prefers writing that is character driven. 8-10c per word. 1,000-20,000 words. Responds in about five weeks.
Evil Girlfriend Media — Horror and urban fantasy centered on female empowerment and defying gender stereotypes. $100 flat payment. 4,000-7,000 words. No response times given. LGBT+ friendly.
Beneath Ceaseless Skies — Fantasy with a focus on secondary worlds and characters. 6c per word. Up to 10,000 words. Average response time 2-4 weeks.
Fantastic Stories — Speculative fiction with an emphasis on diversity and literary style. 15c per word. Up to 3,000 words. Responds within two weeks. LGBT+ positive.
Fiction Vortex — Serialized fantasy and speculative fiction. $300 for featured stories, $50 otherwise. 3,500 words or less. No response times given.
Shimmer — Speculative fiction with an emphasis on diversity, strong plots, vivid characters, and beautiful writing. 5c per word. 7,500 words or less (will consider longer words with query letter). Usually responds within two weeks. LGBT+ positive.
Clarkesworld Magazine — Sci-fi, fantasy, and other speculative fiction. 10c per word up to 5,000 words, 8c per word after. 1,000-16,000 words. Responds within days usually, gives a tracking number.
Apex Magazine — Speculative fiction of all kinds. 6c per word, +1c per word for podcast stories. Up to 7,500 words, all submissions over will be auto-rejected. Responds within 30 days.
Heliotrope Magazine — Speculative fiction of all kinds. 10c per word. Up to 5,000 words. Responds within 30 days.
Lightspeed Magazine — Speculative fiction of all kinds, with creativity and originality in terms of style and format encouraged. 8c per word. 1,500-10,000 words, under 5,000 preferred. LGBT+ positive. Submissions temporarily closed for their main magazine but is accepting for their People of Color Destroy Science Fiction special.
General Fiction
The Sun Magazine — General fiction, likes personal writing or writing of a cultural/political significance. $300-$1500 flat payment and a one year subscription to the magazine for fiction (also accepts essays and poetry). No minimum or maximum lengths but over 7,000 words discouraged. Responds in 3-6 months. Physical submissions only.
One Story — Any and all varieties of fiction, “unique and interesting” stories encouraged. $500 payment plus 25 contributor copies. 3,000-8,000 words. Usually responds in 2-3 months.
Camera Obscura — General fiction. $1000 for featured story, $50 for “Bridge the Gap” award, no payment for other contributors. 250-8,000 words. Response time vary, running just over two months as of now.
Flash Fiction
Daily Science Fiction — Speculative flash fiction (including sci-fi, fantasy, slipstream, etc.). 8c per word. Up to 1,500 words, but shorter stories given priority. Response times not listed.
Vestral Review — General flash fiction. 3-10c per word depending on length to a max of $25. Up to 500 words. Response within four months.
Flash Fiction Online — General flash fiction. $60 flat payment. 500-1,000 words. Response times not listed.
Novels/Novella
Riptide Publishing — Any LGBTQ manuscripts between 15,000 and 150,000 words. Currently especially interested in lesbian romances, trans stories, asexual/aromantic stories, romances with a happy ending, and genre fiction such as urban fantasy. Also has a YA branch. LGBT+ positive.
Crimson Romance — Romance stories of all kinds, currently seeking LGBT+ stories with a focus on emotional connections and relationships, especially m/m romance. Novel (55,000-90,000 words) or novella (20,000-50,000 words) length. LGBT+ positive.
Kindle Direct Publishing
Kindle Direct Publishing — Allows you to set your own prices, create your own cover art, and make royalties off of each sell. Any and all genres are welcome and if you’re prolific and smart about how you’re publishing you can make pretty good money.
General Guide to Kindle Publishing — Gives a good rundown of the publishing process on Kindle.
101 Guide to Kindle Erotica — Great guide with lots of resources about how to make money publishing erotica on Kindle.
Publishing Comics/Graphic Novels
Here is a list of potential comic companies and what kind of open submissions they accept.
Here is a list of literary agents who accept graphic novels.
high school teachers: if you don’t show up with a dress and full makeup or a fitted tuxedo to class everyday to college your professors will execute you
college professors:
I once had a professor SLAM a thermos down on his desk and say to us “there’s more pressure in my sinuses right now than there is at the bottom of the sea. This thing’s full of NyQuil. I’m going to drink it while I teach, and when your heads are replaced by swirling rainbows, I will cancel the rest of class.” The class ended up being 17 minutes long.
Your professor was trying to fight God
this guy would survive in movies
girl i hope you appreciate your boyfriend. he just stood practically on top of a horror movie monster so you could get out of the elevator first. he loves you.
are we going to ignore the actress who got kicked in the face
well thats the price you pay for fucking terrifying someone
This whole post is GOLD
Yea, if you’re an actor and you deliberately try to freak people out then you need to be aware it’s flight or FIGHT. There’s a chance that someone will run away screaming but someone could also square up and try to kick your creepy ass.
By deciding to be a creepy bastard you are accepting the possibility that you might end up getting hurt and I do not feel sorry for you.
But a quick reminder: if you go to a haunted house, DONT GO if you know you react to fear with violence. You’re paying to be scared by these actors; they’re doing their jobs. They don’t deserve to be punched for something you signed off on.
But if you’re an actor or prankster who’s picking targets who didn’t consent ahead of time, be warned, you might get punched.
Every discussion point on this post is gold
This guy doesn’t pull any punches
Reblogging this version instead cause ppl think this is about trashing LOK.
And it ain’t. LOK was good despite all the bullshit nickelodeon kept pulling on the creators.
Me running out of area 51 with my copy of half life 3
Did you grab portal 3??
On my way back to area 51, because I forgot portal 3
So my Dad and brother took separate cars to dinner tonight, and this happened.
they look like they are arguing about who is going to go home and change
Oh, they were.
Jake: You’ve got to be kidding me Dad: You SAW me walk through the kitchen on my way to pick up your sister! Jake: No seriously do you have an extra shirt in your car this is ridiculous
Oh my god they’re gonna kill me they didn’t want to even walk into the restaurant together let alone have this many people reblog this photo
Honestly I’m not deleting my Tumblr solely in the hopes that this post one day hits 1 million notes
A collection from the new Unraveled
Hey, Idk if you remember me but I asked you about yours game grumps that you made on sims 4 do you still have them on the galery?
Ofc I remember! They should still be there! I went to double check but I can’t sign into Origin at the moment??
@twistedtk
Both the new
And the old versions
Are still on the gallery!
THANK YOU @personeh!
Captain America: Civil War (2016) dir. Joe and Anthony Russo
its like marine biology Jackass
i love this guy 60% of every video is him rolling around on the floor screaming while his camera guy goes “hey….. u ok?” then 5 minutes later he gets up and is like “ok folks, there u have it, the Satan DeathRay Fire Monster actually does cause pain when it bites u. science is great”
To be fair, this is actually a really good way of getting kids to realize that these animals really are dangerous, and he goes through the first aid either on the same video or in a follow up video (if it’s something complicated). IIRC, the whole reason he started doing videos like this was because while he was in Montana or something he saw a lot of Facebook posts about people whose dogs had gotten too close to a porcupine and they didn’t know how to remove the quills, so he (naturally) went into the woods, found a porcupine, quilled himself and filmed himself taking the quills out and explaining what he was doing.
He’s still fucking insane, but, you know, it’s for a good cause
He’s living his best life, his job is getting hurt on camera and educating others on how to be safe. And he clearly loves his job.
The rightful heir to the throne Steve Irwin left.
One of my favorite spongebob scenes.