hey what if people called me they/them for the laffs... the lols... the lmaooos, if you will...
Peter Solarz

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oozey mess
Game of Thrones Daily
todays bird
Cosimo Galluzzi
dirt enthusiast
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if i look back, i am lost

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blake kathryn

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Claire Keane
h

JVL

Discoholic 🪩
KIROKAZE
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
taylor price
$LAYYYTER

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@uncreative-queer
hey what if people called me they/them for the laffs... the lols... the lmaooos, if you will...
happy pride month
My dear lgbt+ kids,
People who choose to transition socially but not physically are brave.
Before anyone immediately jumps to bad faith interpretations, let me point out that I’m saying „brave“, not „braver“ or „better“. I am not comparing anyone or pitting anyone against each other, I’m not making any sort of statement about trans people who do physically transition here. I love and support you, this letter is just not about you.
Okay, back to the point at hand: When I say social transition, I refer to openly using a name and pronouns that reflect your gender identity. Affirming haircuts and clothes can also be included here. By physical transition, I specifically mean hormones and surgeries.
When we talk about people who transition socially but not physically, there isn’t the one specific narrow path for how that looks like. It includes
people who wouldn’t physically transition even if it was super easy to access. They like their body the way it is, they just want to be gendered correctly the way they are.
people who maybe would physically transition if it was easier but not in their actual real life circumstances. They may experience body dysphoria but the stress (financial burden, potential health risks etc.) of pursuing physical transition outweighs the stress of dealing with dysphoria for them.
people who really do not have all that much choice, they can not realistically access physical transition regardless of how much they want it, so they just have to choose to make the best out of their circumstances.
In some spaces, there is the assumption that social transition is always „only the first step“, and in some even that it’s the „easy way out“ or the „cowardly choice“. And so you may have to explain highly personal things over and over again or face assumptions and stereotypes. You may be confronted with people who pity you for your „failed transition“ (because surely you must be on hormones and they just don’t do anything?) or assume you „stopped being trans“ (because surely if you really were trans, you would’ve had surgery by now?).
Passing is another aspect. Of course there are people who do not care about passing or to whom the concept of passing doesn’t really apply, and yes, some people can pass amazingly well without any medical steps - but those points don’t apply to everyone in this group and it’s dismissive to act like they do.
Choosing to socially transition without medical steps can come with some lingering doubts (questions like: will I ever be fully seen as my gender by others? Would I have been happier in an alternate timeline where I did transition? Do I owe physical transition to myself? … but also: Will I ever be attractive to the people I want to attract? Will I always feel like an outsider among trans people who do physically transition? Am I harming those who advocate for the right to surgery if I don’t use it? Do I owe others physical transition?) - and it can also put you in a vulnerable position. Passing can be about much more than your personal preferences, it can be a safety concern. For those who can’t easily pass with just a haircut, clothes and cosmetic choices (makeup, shaving etc.), not physically transitioning can mean you always stay somewhat „visibly trans“. You can not count on the comfort that „some day those who misgender you will look like they have dementia“.
I don’t want to be dismissive by going „And dealing with all that makes you a strong fighter!“ because 1.) I’m sure most trans people would rather live in a safe world where their mere existence didn’t require strength, and 2.) it very easily veers into „inspiration porn“ territory where you are reduced to your struggles rather than being seen as a whole human being. I don’t want to do that.
But I do want to tell you that you are brave. Speaking out and saying „Hey, this is who I am and I want you to respect it“ is brave. Saying „This is my name and this is how to refer to me, and this is important to me“ is brave. And it is brave fully independently of whatever steps follow after. It’s brave if absolutely no steps follow after.
Being openly trans means being unapologetically yourself - and that is always brave.
With all my love,
Your Tumblr Dad
Frames From The Edge (1989), dir. Adrian Maben
"we're all faggots in the eyes of the state!" "we all have it just as bad!"
ok. wage gap
source
like. come on now
trans mennnn pspspsps understand your relative privilege over your transfem sisters and use it to support and uplift us instead of pretending not to have the structural leverage necessary to harm us. ooooo you know you want to build queer solidarity
one of the interesting features of this post is that there are sentences it doesn't have because they are sentences I am not saying. among them:
"trans men aren't oppressed"
"trans men have the same amount of privilege as cis men" (see: 70 cents to their dollar)
"trans men don't face their own issues that deserve discussion and attention"
"trans men are ontologically evil"
"it's bad to be a trans man"
"a trans man killed my grandma"
see, I employed a writing strategy wherein, if I don't believe a sentence to be true, I don't say it
me when there are hot women every where
It's just me and my mean ass feminist mutuals against the world, it's just me and the lesbians and the trans women and the trans lesbians going 🧐🙄🤨 against the world. Keep making faces at people who are being misogynistic and ridiculous, it's all we have in this world.
I know that the UK censorship laws are evils and fucked up on the face of them but I feel like we kinda blew past the part where it uses a phrenology machine to check your age.
“Yeah also the phrenology machine doesn’t work.” Yeah that’s already covered in the part about it being a phrenology machine.
I get that sex and drugs are fun but even im like. at least have a 3rd thing. at least one more hobby. you can have a 3rd hobby. this isnt a purity thing this is a some of u are fucking boring thing.
rock & roll
girl i just walked into that one like a coyote with a painted tunnel
Artist is Monica Villarreal out of Houston Texas
worthy. Happy Pride 2025.
At the end of the day, dykes who belong to butch/femme culture are like, a minority within a minority within another minority. We're downright a fucking matrioshka of minorities.
Just because, due to our hypervisibility when coupled, cishet society has painted us as the standard for dykehood doesn't mean we're actually normative and that there's any societal pressure within gay women's communities to Adhere to a butch/femme lifestyle, courtship and identity.
If anything the rest of you all (which, again, you outnumber us massively, so there's absolutely an imbalance there) keep isolating us and treating us like shit any chance you all get. Often even in collaboration with cishet people at that.
We don't want to date, marry or fuck other dykes who're not playing within our subculture, and you don't want us either. So don't?
For a third time; we're a minority subculture within gay women, you won't be missing out on much numerically speaking by excluding us from your romantic and sexual pools, and when you take into account that us being part of butch/femme while you're not makes us incompatible in most ways? You're all really not missing out on a damn thing.
Leave us alone. How often do you see us shit talking dykes who DON'T belong to butch/femme and talking about how unprogressive you all are and how it's not real lesbianism or whatever? Because that's what you all constantly do to us. This is LITERALLY a "Don't like? Don't partake" issue. For fuck's sake.
You girlies treat us the same way straight women treat gay women in general.
Don't want us at all but also resent us for not wanting you back either, and lash out at us for it. And yes it's just as insufferable.
We all know the reason straight women do that to lesbians and bi women is because they think we're beneath them, so while they don't want us, us not wanting them either disparages them because it levels things out, right? Right.
Well, I'm pretty sure the same mechanisms apply to how so many of you treat us. Simultaneously despise us yet are resentful that you're not one of us. It's not that you want in, it's that regardless of whether you want in or not who are we to deny you access?
And yes, we do perceive you as people just as despicable as that makes you sound.
Oh ok so it turns out ive been borrowing grief from the future ! it turns out ive been preparing to lose the things i love rather than basking in the light of them while they last. Maybe i should nt do that
listening to a butch ramble about their interests and then cutting them off by grabbing them and kissing them until they can’t think straight, watching their eyes widen and their face turn red as I push them down against the bed and kiss them over and over until they've forgotten what they were talking about
I really don't fuck with the idea of "cishet men being there is a sign of a healthy queer community" and the way it gets touted as a litmus test like "oh but cishet men being there is a good sign for all the closeted trans women." Like okay if you're trying to convince a bunch of trans women that your queer community is safe for them I really don't think you should, even implicitly, be saying "oh don't worry, our queer community is totally inclusive of trans women! That's why we've got cishet men here! Y'all are pretty much the same, right?"
Like, a closeted trans woman is probably going to feel more comfortable in a queer community if she sees a bunch of other trans women who are safe and comfortable, innit?
how do i say this… you may be on tumblr reading blogs discussing butchfemme id, reading books about it, and feel fairly confident in your understanding of concepts of butchfemme culture. but people aren’t concepts. you might have a lot of love, desire and respect for the concept of a butch or femme, but do you actually feel all that for the butch or femme in front of you? a fantasy of a femme or butch lover being projected onto someone is the farthest thing from respect. start prioritizing making friends with the butches and femmes you meet. you’re never going to be able to get a solid grasp onto community if you’re driven to interact with it by the idea that you’re not already whole without a counterpart