welcome to avanzinii wrapped, a love letter and collection of all the fics and authors i adored this year. quick disclaimer, this isn’t a definitive list, and there’s many more works i wish i could’ve included. however, we’d be here all day if i didn’t limit it. along with this, none of the fics are ranked, and are just listed for simplest viewing. since this is a katseye focused blog, all recs are of katseye. i also did not include any yoonchae fanfics as she just turned 18 yesterday 😭 there aren’t any 18+ fics here, but some include suggestive themes. with that, are you ready to open?
i spent a lot of time reading, lurking on katsblr. but there were a few fics i was constantly revisiting…can you guess them?
⋱ 𐙚 1. you get me so high by @soeyekonic
—— who? daniela avanzini
—— author’s synopsis: during a livestream, dani plays it cool when a comment hints at something between you two, but later it’s clear things aren’t as simple as she lets on.
—— my notes: has three parts! im pretty sure ive thought abt this fic at least once a week since its release
⋱ 𐙚 2. nervous by @modanisgf
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: you had never really noticed megan before, yet she was in your chemistry class and hung out around your friend circle. so when you got partnered up for your chemistry final, you didn’t think much of it. though when you encounter your near death— a vigilante saved your life. and you hate to speculate but they seemed familiar, their voice, their tight grip on your waist. it all felt a little too similar to a certain girl in your chemistry class.
—— my notes: no one’s ever had me…not like you….
⋱ 𐙚 3. comerte by @antagonistzini
—— who? daniela avanzini
—— author’s synopsis: N/A
—— my notes: so sad to see it go but i had to include it anyway, i loveddd this smau. but rai’s new works are even better, mastermind author 😪
⋱ 𐙚 4. perhaps even this by @edamameiyok
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: A year ago, you were known as your friend group’s “sunshine.” You were able to light up a whole room with your energy and everyone could rely on you for your quick wit and easy humor. You lived life simply one day at a time. However, seemingly out of nowhere, that all changes. Now a Junior in university, you find it extremely difficult to do all the things you used to do. Especially being the Resident Assistant for the Geffen Dorms. New residents begin to move in and one them is a girl you could only describe as “radiant." Her name is Megan Skiendiel, and at first, you don’t welcome the positivity but as you two continue to meet and hang out, you find yourself becoming the person you used to be. Will you be able to be that person you were a year ago? Or will everything just stay the same?
—— my notes: the smau that inspired me to start a smau, just amazing
⋱ 𐙚 5. track ten by @98oceans
—— who? daniela avanzini
—— author’s synopsis: college au, y/n as daniela’s gay awakening, doomed yuri, unspoken feelings
—— my notes: so so so good like everything abt it 😪💔
one thing i learned during my time here, though, was that eyekons loooveee angst. and i am no different! here are some of my favorite angst fics i’ve read this year.
⋱ 𐙚 1. GABRIELA? by @jeeseth
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: you fell for the nerd. now she’s hot—and obviously gabriela wants her. but too bad so sad megan’s already yours. and gabriela? she never even stood a chance.
—— my notes: reading this around the time of beautiful chaos release was peak
⋱ 𐙚 2. mine in capital letters by @charlvr
—— who? sophia laforteza
—— author’s synopsis: Sophia wasn't in love with you or anything, hell, she wasn't even dating you. But didn't mean much. You were still hers. Now could everyone else get the hint?
—— my notes: i loooveee a good jealous sophia fic
⋱ 𐙚 3. jonny (reprise) by @modanisgf
—— who? daniela avanzini
—— author’s synopsis: daniela made you feel safe, loved even. but she couldn't bring herself to love you proudly— show you off to the world. and now you couldn't do it anymore.. you convinced yourself for years she’d be your first and last. but it hurt to be with her, when she couldn’t come to terms with who she really was.
—— my notes: there’s fluff to this one too, but the angst is the best part, soo beautifully written like kiana ur mind…
⋱ 𐙚 4. what i meant was you by @imaxdead
—— who? daniela avanzini
—— author’s synopsis: you never wanted to agree to this — helping him win over her — but here you are, knee-deep in love with the very girl you were supposed to help him get.
—— my notes: this one has fluff too but the angst is so 💔💔
however, my heart is not empty!!! here are some of the sweetest fluffs i read.
⋱ 𐙚 1. jealous by @modanisgf
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: in which megan hates the way people flirt with you, in front of her like it's nothing. leading to an incident that left hybe in shambles…
—— my notes: i still remember reading this for the first time 💔 part two when…
⋱ 𐙚 2. video game lover by @98oceans
—— who? lara raj
—— author’s synopsis: popular streamer!r, producer / model! lara, black cat x energetic husky, private but not secret relationship. wlw. chat is wild and relentless, and so are their friends.
—— my notes: so good, just read it !
⋱ 𐙚 3. tangled in love by @ninguitar
—— who? lara raj
—— author’s synopsis: the friendly neighborhood spider meets the outlaw cat.
—— my notes: i love spiderman x katseye fics soooo bad…keep them coming pls
⋱ 𐙚 4. vinyl and your number by @usagimygoatfr
—— who? manon bannerman
—— author’s synopsis: a part-time worker at a dingy vinyl store in the middle of nowhere meets manon bannerman, a member of a girl group she has never heard of
—— my notes: so cute, ill always love this fic
⋱ 𐙚 5. look of love by @katskisses
—— who? manon bannerman
—— author’s synopsis: manon bannerman has never been the one for romance, but a few days with you was enough to change her mind.
—— my notes: just absolute fluff perfection i love this fic so much 😪
⋱ 𐙚 6. wikihow to rizz by @bannerwoman
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: when megans got zero game around u but wikihow's 10 steps to bag a girl comes in clutch 😭🥀
—— my notes: SO funny like oh my god.
it’d be wrong of me to not mention music in a spotify wrapped spin-off! so this section is for you, giving you an artist i believe you would love based off your eyekonsblr guilty pleasure.
TYPE A; …. for those who spent the year indulging in daniela angst, i know what u are…! your artist is ethel cain.
TYPE B; …. for those who spent the year indulging in everything and anything fluff, your artist is yves.
TYPE C; …. for those who spent the year indulging in smaus, ily! ur always the sweetest. your artist is malcolm todd.
TYPE D; …. for those who spent the year indulging in anything surrounding lara raj, good luck babe! your artist is beyoncé.
sadly, this year’s wrapped is coming to a close. but, a series can prolong that. here are my favorite smaus and/or series that have come out this year.
⋱ 𐙚 1. SUDDENLY Y/N…? by @usagimygoatfr
—— who? sophia laforteza
—— author’s synopsis: casting director huh yunjin is desperately trying to find the perfect seymour krelborn after practically begging on her knees to get sophia laforteza to play as audrey for the school's upcoming musical theater event. little did she know, the perfect seymour was with her all this time, raging to stardew valley and animal crossing.
—— my notes: you just had to be there
⋱ 𐙚 2. love on a wire by @ninguitar
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: megan has never, ever wanted anything as bad in her life, until you—an underground singer and songwriter, is unemployed, and the textbook definition of a loser—stroll into her heart and her life. matter of fact, what happens when she accidentally replies to your thirst-traps that were a rebounding joke after a rough break-up, on twitter, and on the official katseye account?
—— my notes: literally perfect whos doing it like ninguitar
⋱ 𐙚 3. Bakit Mahal Pa Rin Kita? by @xyrescape
—— who? sophia laforteza
—— author’s synopsis: everyone knew that sophia doesn’t like to talk about her past, especially if it’s connected with yn. the same girl who used to play with her when they were younger, in other words her childhood best friend— the girl she loved. their break up was honestly never expected by anyone, one fight led all of it to end. sophia knows to let go of things quickly, a break up wouldn't be an exception. and yn? well, she lingers. always trying to get sophia's attention, all while trying to deny that she still loves her. maybe she just loves the girl too much to forget about her, or she just misses the ghost of the girl who used to know. well, how long will yn keep chasing the girl who won't even spare a glance at her? will she get sophia back or will she find someone new?
—— my notes: perfection. everything abt it.
⋱ 𐙚 4. Behind the booth by @willowves
—— who? sophia laforteza
—— author’s synopsis: yn has had a crush on sophia for as long as she can remember, starting her freshman year of college. Now it’s junior year and nothing has changed. Until that fundraiser happened and the kissing booth blew up. sophia didn’t mean to kiss her but she did, and now everyone is freaking out. Twitter is in chaos, and the whole school is in shambles. yn finally thinks she has a chance… until that rumor breaks out.
—— my notes: every chapter is made w sm quality, willow is never lacking !!!
⋱ 𐙚 5. ONE NUMBER OFF! by @mmiwaves
—— who? megan skiendiel
—— author’s synopsis: in which the megan accidentally texts a random number thinking it was the well beloved pokimane. news flash, it wasn’t! just a random girl who also happens to be a famous streamer.
—— my notes: making as mi updated w/ a new chapter like woah..but i just loveee this smau, so cute and funny. u can never go wrong with it!
⋱ 𐙚 6. Quit. by @meiyookie
—— who? sophia laforteza
—— author’s synopsis: Sophia Laforteza had everything any 22 year old could ever wish for. Fame. Money. Fans. Afraid of the secrecies she kept from the outside world, she sabotaged everything good around her. Including the conflicted relationship she had with Y/N L/N. Will Sophia finally get her act together? Or will Y/N stand up for herself and move on? Find out here!
—— my notes: just started recently but its been such an addiction for me
wait, sorry, i’m getting word that something new just dropped? the name is so familiar to me, but i can’t quite remember…
maybe you’ll recognize this one?
surprise! :) thank you for reading this far, and i hope you enjoy these works just as much as i did!
while you’re here, i want to say thank you so much for all the support given to me this year. i’ve only been here for 6 months now, but each one of you have made this a beautiful community. so a special mention to my dear anons, my friends, and anyone who has been reading. thank you! im sososo very grateful to interact w u guys everyday :)
firstly, how are you dear? hope ur doing well and all that ♡
You see, I was just yk doing my thing and then spotify played a song, that i think would be so cute for an extra chapter to "suddnely...y/n" ( only if you want ofc)
❛❛ Every now and then I think you might want me to
Come show up at your door,
But I'm just too afraid that I'll be wrong. . . ᝰ.ᐟ
જ⁀➴ Pairing Sophia Laforteza x fem reader ! ◞౿
જ⁀➴ genre based on a song, angst, lovers to exes, yearning hardcore, reader still wants her lowk, Sophia does too, they’re both too prideful to admit it tho, doomed yuri ! ◞౿
Months after a petty breakup, you end up in the same room as Sophia Laforteza, rare as that sounds, under the dim lights and swarming bodies. You pretend like you’ve moved on, even though the truth is so far from that. Every time your eyes meet hers, every smile that’s not yours, your heart clenches—because it’s a reminder of what you lost. Even though neither of you couldn’t stand to be around each other, you still hoped she’d come around but you knew it wouldn’t happen. How could it, when you didn’t talk anymore?
➴ a/n + wc was randomly listening to wdta in the car and I had a vision idk I just wanted to get this out of my head. Like I love this song sm, words can’t even describe it, 3K ‧₊˚.
➴ now playing. . . We don’t talk anymore ᝰ.ᐟ + Visualizer ‧₊˚.
It had been eight long months since you’d had any real contact with her. No calls, no texts, not even a distant glimpse of her around campus. Just silence. Thirty-six weeks. Two hundred fifty-two days without her smile, her laughter, or her dramatic little complaints about the AC being too cold.
Honestly, you still don’t know how you survived.
Every night, it was the same playlist of memories looping behind your eyes, replaying until they were burned into your mind so deeply that closing your eyes only made her face clearer. It felt like life’s way of saying, “you fucked up,” and now this was the consequence.
You don’t even know when it all shifted. One day you two were messing around, taking midnight strolls, pointing at constellations, laughing at each other’s half-assed attempts at flirtation and the next, everything collapsed into petty misunderstandings and silent treatment.
It’s not like you didn’t try.
You just spent so much time trying to keep Sophia happy. Apologizing when her jealousy flared. Sleeping on the couch because a cashier at the convenience store stared too long. Dragging yourself back home alone just because you didn’t tell her you were with your friends. You couldn’t do a single thing without her knowing.
It was suffocating. You were drowning in the middle of the ocean while Sophia kept dipping your head into the water.
Each time, all you wanted was for her to see you, really see you. To realize she was the only one you wanted. You wanted her validation like a crown, proof that your entire heart was reserved for her and her alone.
But of course, you weren’t a saint either. You were simply human.
In those last few weeks, everything pooled onto your chest like acid until you finally broke. You didn’t want to live your whole life as a slave to someone else’s emotions at the cost of your own. You didn’t want to spend nights crying because Sophia stood you up on your birthday, nor did you want to hear the door slam shut when she left, angry because you didn’t understand where she was coming from. So you did the one thing you were good at: you avoided her.
Two texts became five, then ten, then missed calls until you shut her out completely. And when she came over, all you did was throw thinly veiled insults, cut her with sarcasm, and hurt both of you in the process. You called her out when she hung out with Leon, the taste already burning on your tongue and on your mind. You zoned out when she talked about her day, pretending your nails were far more interesting than what Sophia had to say.
You didn’t even know what you wanted besides going back to how it used to be.
Back when you understood each other. When good morning texts were enough to make your chest warm. When Sophia called you baby and it gave you butterflies. When she showed up with lilies and spent hours trying to teach you Tagalog. When days were spent with love and affection instead of neglect and resentment. You missed that more than words could describe.
But eventually, neither of you could stand being near each other anymore.
Sophia left without saying a word, and you sank into self-loathing. Her last text stayed read while yours remained unanswered.
After Sophia, you couldn’t bring yourself to look at anyone the way you looked at her. It felt like she left a bullet inside you, lodged so deep that removing it would’ve meant taking part of her away with it. And even though every part of you told you to pull it out, you couldn’t move a finger.
You were the only one who struggled to erase Sophia like she never existed.
Lara, though? She wiped every single trace of her. Sophia’s paintings disappeared. Her scrunchies, necklaces, love letters, all gone. You didn’t know whether to thank her or cry, but you knew Lara was just trying to take care of you. In the way Sophia failed.
But you still didn’t understand how going on dates was supposed to fix anything. According to Lara, you needed to get out there, show the world that you were still complete, that you didn’t need anyone’s validation to breathe. To love and live. Especially not Sophia.
So, you listened.
Which is how you ended up here.
At a stupid, inconvenient frat party.
The moment you step inside the room, you immediately want to turn around and leave. It’s loud, filled with drowsy, drunk students, daring each other to do something that would definitely embarrass them when they wake up. You immediately curse out Lara who mentioned it was a small party but you knew better than to believe her. So technically, you were the one at fault here.
The dance floor is too crowded for you to distract yourself so you gravitate towards the drinks. Taking a shot, you drown it in one go while scanning the room for a potential partner to levy your night with. Sophia would’ve never allowed you to come to a place like this, always insisting that you stay with her and watch a movie while you both cuddled under her favorite blanket.
Your heart twists sharply at the thought, but it almost rips apart when your eyes lock on none other than the girl who broke your heart.
She’s standing near the bar, half turned, her chin propped on her hands as she grins cheekily at one of the guys. Her hair is shorter than you remember, resting on her shoulders, with the ends still curling slightly. But the way she tucks it behind her ear is the same. The muscle memory burns in your chest, hot and fast and you have to look away before you stop breathing.
It’s ridiculous, really, how easily that familiar feeling of warmth rouses in your heart, as if asking if that’s actually your Sophia.
Your Sophia, like she didn’t wake up one day and decided she wanted nothing to do with you.
Your Sophia, as if she didn’t walk out on you because she was simply tired and couldn’t fight for you any longer.
Your Sophia Laforteza.
Your Sophia.
Sophia.
Every syllable feels like pressing on a bruise you never let heal. You’ve stopped saying it loud but your heart still recognizes her. The way you would recognize your reflection even in the dark.
You grab another drink, trying to drown yourself in something other than regret. Except you can’t forget the flash of silver before you looked away.
She was still wearing the ring.
The one you saved for. It’s the one you caught Sophia looking at while shopping for your sister's wedding.
You wonder if she even remembers the night. When you slipped it onto her finger last year while she looked at you like you grew two heads and scolded you for spoiling her. Later, she kissed you and shyly told you it made her feel like a princess even though you both knew she would’ve been fine with a paper ring.
You wonder if she tried to slip it off, just to see if it would hurt less to remove it.
You’re trying your best to keep your gaze on your cup but it flails around a bit before slowly returning to her.
The people around you don’t really matter. They stopped mattering the moment your eyes found her. Still, you do try. Lara says your name, nudges you and you jerk your head, automatically nodding, a practiced gesture so it wouldn’t look like you were zoning out.
You were.
All you can focus on is the way Sophia’s leaning on some guy to hear him out. Her hand now rests on his chest as he bends forward to whisper something in her ear. She throws her head back and laughs that stupid whale laugh you’ve always adored.
Before, it was always for you. Now it’s for someone else. It shouldn’t have mattered.
But it did
It still did.
Your chest tightens in that slow agonizing way when you realise you’ve left the pan on the stove for too long. It’s too sharp but not enough to break you. It’s enough to remind you that you’re nowhere near over her. That you might never be.
You put your drink down, fingers shaking as you leave the cup and curl it around your forearms. A nervous habit that Sophia found adorable.
You close your eyes shut, hoping so strongly that this is just a nightmare, that you’re still in bed poring over your books instead of being in the same room as Sophia.
Lara calls out for you softly and you crack your eyes open, just to see what she has to say. Her lips curl upwards and she holds out her hand for you to take it.
You don’t know whether it’s the alcohol making you fuzzy or your own overwhelmed emotions overflowing but you take it, mainly because you can’t stand there and do nothing.
Lara guides you in a way that feels comforting and familiar and you let yourself bask in the normality just for a moment. You clasp your hands around her neck as she mentions something dumb and your mind eases just for a little while
You smile because it’s better than pressing them together and trying to stop them from trembling. Lara gazes at you, her eyebrows crinkling together as if she knows what you’re thinking about. She puts both of her hands on your cheek, pulling a surprise gasp out of you.
She leans forward, forehead brushing against yours, and murmurs a focus on me and you do. You look straight at her and for a second, you forget all about the hurt clinging to your skin. Of the fact that Sophia is less than 7 feet away from you. Of the fact that she’s with someone else.
Lara takes your hand and twirls you, trying her best to make you smile and she does. Your lips twitch and Lara smiles harder, proud that she cheered you up.
But then you tilt your head and make the mistake by looking straight ahead and locking eyes with Sophia.
It’s as if time slows down and the world stops spinning and you swear the music fades for a moment before buzzing in your ear again.
Your breath stutters in your chest as Sophia roams her eyes over your face and ending it on your eyes. Hers are full of light but you catch the faint dimness in them as she catches the way Lara’s hands are all over you. There’s no anger in them anymore. No fire. Not even blame.
For a split moment, you think she might walk over. Your mind goes haywire at the mere possibility and your hand almost rises, almost waves. Almost reaches for her the way she used to in crowded rooms.
But before either of those happens, Sophia’s eyes shift back to her friend and you let out the breath you’ve been holding hostage.
That was it. That tiny ordinary movement settles in your chest like a final straw breaking.
You don’t know why that makes your chest hurt nor does it explain why you suddenly feel like bursting into tears right now. Right now, you just want to leave. That moment between you and Sophia feels heavy. As if it were just two strangers who knew each other for a long time, glancing at each other.
The air in the room feels thicker now. Suffocating. The music feels dull now and you barely hear Lara call out your name. Every laugh around you feels too loud and too forced. It’s on mute.
Your grip on Lara’s shoulder weakens like your resolve and she knows you can’t stay for much longer. You remain though, for her sake but the longer you wait, all you can think about is Sophia’s gaze leaving yours. Her careful expression and the slight break.
The truth feels too heavy inside and you don’t think you’ll ever be fine. Not even close. Maybe someday.
You leave the party before it winds down, hands in your pockets, observing the bright city lights glaring down on you as a few cars pass by. The cool air bites at your skin as goosebumps rise. You don’t ask anyone to walk with you because you need time to breathe. To think and ache. You want space for your mind without pretending.
You begin walking home, only sending Lara a going home text as you distract yourself by the sound of your echoing footsteps against the pavement.
Your fingers grip inside your pocket, thoughts already wandering back to her. It’s so stupid, how easily your mind finds her again.
Every corner reminds you of something. Places you’ve walked together. Streets Sophia once dragged you down because she wanted to show you her favorite artist's poster or a stupid mural she thought you’d like. You’ve always been big on painting. It’s why Lara decided to get rid of all of Sophia’s hard work.
Your chest aches with memories you don’t invite and your eyes shut, trusting your feet to drag you home on autopilot.
Your phone vibrates in your pocket, soft and instant.
Your heart lurches.
You already know it’s not from her. But you take it out anyway because you have no sense of self control.
1:03 a.m
Lara is sending you a get home safe text along with an I love you. You swipe it away, putting her chat on mute cause you didn’t want your heart to keep getting disappointed.
And there it is.
Sophia’s chat.
You haven’t opened it in months but it still sits at the top, as though your phone too, refuses to live on. As if Sophia hadn't really left you at all. Her name looks smaller than it used to. Or maybe it’s just you’ve grown so accustomed to it.
You don’t open the chat. You don’t even lift a finger.
You just stare at the last message sitting beneath her name.
“I’ll come by tomorrow. Let’s talk”
Sent four months ago.
Your throat tightens at the sight.
You don’t forget about that time Sophia tried to make things right. She came that night.
You just didn’t open the door.
You get home in one piece, surprisingly, with how turbulent your night has been. You were so sure you would crumple there at the party, you were glad Lara was there to ground you.
You sit down on your bed, the mattress dipping down beneath your weight. The room is dark and familiar, and safe, just the way you like. Your thumb hovers over her name, chat finally opens now. The typing bar blinks at you like it’s daring you to do something. Either brave or stupid, you don’t know.
You looked good tonight.
You type it. Stare at it. Delete it.
I miss you. So much.
You type it and the words appear under your fingers. Delete.
Do you ever think about me?
The question sits there for a heartbeat longer. Delete. Delete. Delete.
You drop your phone onto your pillow as it burned you and let out a soft, humorless laugh. It sounds wrong in the quiet of your room.
It’s pathetic.
Months have passed. You should be over this. Over her. But here you are, halfway between moving on and falling apart, still orbiting a girl who no longer belongs to you.
You close your eyes, but even in the darkness, you see her.
Across the city, Sophia is lying in her own bed, staring up at her ceiling. Her phone is in her hand too, screen casting a pale glow over her face. Her chat with you is open. Has been for a long time.
Your name sits there like a confession she refuses to say out loud.
Her last message is still unread.
“Take care of yourself, okay?”
Read 4 months ago
Her fingers hover above the screen. She types something. Pauses. Backspaces. Types again.
I should have fought harder.
Delete.
Do you hate me?
Delete.
Finally, three simple words stay on the screen:
Wish I’d said I was sorry.
She stares at them. Her jaw tightens. She locks her phone instead.
The clock on her nightstand clicks over to 1:07 a.m.
Both screens go dark.
And even now, divided by distance, pride, and quiet regret, you and Sophia lie awake, staring at the ceilings of your separate rooms, each holding a phone that will not buzz, waiting for a notification that will never come.
Guys I’m sorry about this snoozefest I swear…. It’s like 3 am here and I didn’t proofread for SHIT. I’m doing this for my lovely @kams-corner <3 but this has been procrastinated like for a month now so sorry if some parts feel disorganized. My apologies
megan has always sworn she's a lover girl; the way she treats her cousin is a testament to this. so why—pray tell—did she of all people, got ghosted by you?
It's only gotten harder to make friends | Sophia Laforteza
summary: you can’t help the feeling you get when you see the shepherd girl, even if you try getting lost in the woods somewhere, your nose leads you back to her.
warnings: mentions of blood and death
tags: little red riding hood x the girl who cried wolf
wc: 3.8k
note: i have a lot of fics that i have written halfway but havent finished so uhh expect that sometime within the next year lol. this fic is heavily inspired by my goat ylfa snorgelsson, iykyk. wanted to post something before finals gl on all ur studies if ur in school :) i'm gonna try to be more active on tumblr but i lowkey shy so i'm sorry in advance
“why do you have this cloak all the time? let me try it on!” sophia teased as she pulled the cloak off of you.
your ears perking up and immediately flattening on your head, trying to make themselves invisible but you know the damage is already done.
you ran away before you could see her reaction.
it wasn't always like this. the fear of being discovered didn’t always loom over your head.
“don’t stray off the path, and whatever you do, do not trust the big bad wolf,” your mother called out, as a little girl hurried out of the house to get to her grandmother’s.
you were always a rambunctious child, never wanting to listen to authority figures. ever since your grandmother taught you how to play gin rummy you’d beg and plead to visit. finally finding an excuse to bring over some cinnamon toast rolls and lollipop corn to your sick grandmother, you hurried on her way.
it wasn’t your fault that you strayed off the path, you saw a caterpillar chasing a butterfly. it was just so interesting and then there were the flowers that you thought your grandmother would appreciate, not to mention a stray wolf you saw. but hey, you eventually got to grandma’s house.
approaching the cottage in the woods, you notice the door wasn’t closed but left ajar. pushing it open further, you could only start rambling about your day to your grandmother, far too excited to notice anything different.
“grandmother it's me! i brought cinnamon toast rolls and lollipop corn just like ya like!” you started talking, placing the basket down by her bedside table as you saw her figure lay in bed. “all the good stuff that's gonna help you heal because i know you're not feeling well, there was a bunch of broth but i dumped it.”
“oh? okay dearie you dumped all the broth?” a voice that sounded similar enough to your grandmother replied. the sickness must be affecting her throat.
you didn't think much of it as you continued walking around the room reenacting your travels, “yep it was weighing me down and i needed space so i dumped it in a river”
your grandma seemed to go along with your silliness just like she always did, “so you took the broth halfway? found a river and said ‘this is where the broth goes?’”
“umm.. yeah! but i picked up fresh flowers on the way?” you tried justifying.
“i hope you didn’t stray off the path to get them,” your grandmother said, although there it was again. that strange voice that sounded just like your grandma but not quite.
you brushed it off, she was just sick of course. but as you turn your head to actually look at your grandmother, you notice grandma is looking a little funny. her ears are larger than normal.
“grandma? your ears are honkin’ big,” you say in a joking manner.
but her reply doesn’t match your tone, it was something eerie, unsettling. “better to hear you my dear.”
you can’t help what comes out of your mouth next, “haha.. um grandma, your teeth are really big…”
“all the better to eat you with…” she replies.
“what?”
you watch as your grandmother sits up in the bed, as the sheets, the cap, all of it falls away and somehow without the cottage getting bigger, you see a wolf that towers in the space. its gaze is completely neutral as it stares at you.
it sits on the bed, there's a hum in the air as if something was missing. although it said it would eat you, it made no moves in doing so.
“i.. what happened to my grandma,” as tears welled in your eyes, forcing them back to seem more intimidating.
“i’ve eaten her.” it simply replied, as if talking about the weather or some other trivial topic.
“why?”
“i am a wolf.”
you are only 11, you couldn't process what had happened. the fact that grandma was gone and wasn’t coming back, the tragedy of the situation doesn't hit you as you fire back angrily, “well the woodsman is going to come along, and show you the sharpest side of his axe!”
so you stand there waiting, hours turn into days as you stand waiting for someone, anyone to help. maybe grandma would come back and this was just some sick prank your siblings were playing on you.
but no one ever came.
as time passed, you stood shaking, on the verge of passing out. the lack of water and food was getting to you. but still as ever, the wolf sat on the bed, its gaze fixed on you.
“you are dying.” it stated. staring you down as you wobbled from side to side, your energy rapidly fading.
“no. i’m just waiting” you stated stubbornly.
the wolf could only stare at your paling figure, “if you do not eat, you will die. this is the law”
“what would you have me do?” you mumbled, you were losing hope slowly, maybe you were destined to die here.
the wolf sighed, and turned to look at the fireplace. “go to the fireplace and pick up the axe, come to the foot of the bed, raise up the axe, and split my skull. when i am dead, eat my flesh, and you will be strong enough to wander the woods on your own and return home.”
you could only let our a half hazarded scoff, “thats.. ridiculous, i dont even think i could lift up an axe. no i wont, i cant!”
“the woodsman is not coming.” the wolf argued.
you couldn’t accept that, not now. not after waiting for so long. “he often comes by, i’m sure of it, he’ll be here!”
“i told you, my teeth were made to eat you.”
you let out a frustrated huff, “so just eat me! just eat me and get it over with!”
“it is not your time.” it stated calmly.
“So it's my grandma's time and not my time?!” you shot back.
“yes.”
“well. i don't trust you because everyone told me not to trust you, so then what you say isn't true and the woodsman is coming”, you turn your back to the wolf, walking closer to the window as you look into the woods.
because of hunger, it's a blur, the trees and grass blend together. as you stand there waiting by the window for a woodsman that would never come, what was left of that snarky child that was full of life, was reduced to nothing but hunger.
a strong, overwhelming sense of hunger.
as only instinct takes over, as you pick up the axe. a moment of hesitation washes over you as once you do this, there's no coming back from it.
but the thoughts get drowned out by the rumbling sound in your stomach, heaving the axe over, your eyes empty, as you split the wolf’s skull and consume its flesh.
in the moment before the axe comes down, the wolf lowers its head, ears pressed against its skull as its eyes close as if accepting the outcome.
your hands and teeth tear into the wolf’s body, your face covered in blood as there's something now running through your veins.
you can't recall what happens after, but you remember going back to your home where your mother and siblings await.
you know there are people inside, you can smell them, but the door is locked. even as you try and turn the knob, it won’t budge.
it's the middle of the night and here you stand, outside the front door of your house, tapping lighting on the window. your red cloak draped over your head as you now attempt to hide your newly sprouted ears.
“mom.. mom..” you whisper shout, but no one answers.
you tap harder, leaving scratches on the windows from your claws.
“mom? mom it’s me, i'm back, something really bad happened to grandma.” you shout a bit louder.
“get away from here!” your mother shouts back.
you stand there frozen for a second, why was mom treating you this way?
“mom if you could just let me in, i’ll explain everything!” you pleaded, you were scared. the forest behind you only appeared to be getting darker by the second.
“i’m sorry that i strayed from the path, you were right and there were grave consequences. is the door barred because i can’t-”
before you could finish your sentence the voice of your mother pierced your ears again.
“i don’t know what you are. but my daughter is dead!”
“no she’s not shes right here please mom.”
“wear her skin all you like, but i know, look at you!”
you see that a hand held mirror is held up to the window, your reflection finally being seen. you notice the way your eyes glow a dangerous yellow, how the claws on your hands and furry ears in your head stick out from your cloak.
you hiss in reaction, something about it making you angry.
“mom i think there's just been a misunderstanding please, i’m sorry. it was my fault… grandma is dead, i dont have anywhere to go if not here and it feels like the door is barred and i can’t get in and…” you pause, “i don’t know what i’ll try to do if i can’t get in. mom, please i’m scared.”
you hear a voice from inside, “we know that the wolf can wear the clothes of others, we know that it can mimic their voice. our only hope is that the woodsman will come”
you feel rage suddenly fill your body, “but the woodsman never comes, don’t count on the fucking woodsman.” you spit out.
for that moment you lost yourself, you quickly regained your composure. “i’m sorry i cursed, i’m so sorry. please mom.” you were getting desperate.
“alright, alright… don't hurt us, don't do anything to the home. come to the door and i will let you in.”
you felt relief for the first time in weeks, you dust yourself off, the dirt and debris that clung onto your cloak not letting go. you try to make yourself more presentable but accidentally add a tear to your cloak. you’re stronger than you remember.
“it’s fine i can fix it, i can fix it.” you think to yourself.
the door unlocks as you walk in, the lights are off, you can't seem to see anyone.
taking another step into the house, a silver blade impales itself into your shoulder.
“mom? who threw that?” you shout, scared, you panicked not knowing where to look. you couldn’t see anything.
but you could smell them.
“run! run out the backdoor!” your mothers voice could be heard shouting to your siblings.
this was a trap, the blade was meant to peirce you in the heart. coming to that realization you feel anger start to boil within you, an uncontrollable rage.
“you lured me in with your own love? you fucking scam of a woman.” you shouted, not recognizing your own voice anymore.
you slowly stalk towards your mother, her hiding figure behind the dinner table. the table that was set with one less plate.
you flip the table, a growl coming from your throat, “did you have a nice dinner? a nice dinner while you thought i was dead? if i was so dead then where is my headstone!?”
you remember your claws extending and your bones breaking in unnatural positions, the hair on your back growing to spread across your body as you tripled in size.
you shake the memories away not wanting to remember what happened after, its been a year since then. you wander the forests, your ears and tail still sticking out of your cloak, the same red cloak your grandmother gifted you.
it still had the rip in it from that night.
there was a bright side though, something that you could look forward to. there was a shepherd girl that was often bored, she’d randomly shout “there’s a wolf! there's a wolf!” so often that the village grew sick of her jokes.
sometimes you would just watch from afar, watching as she would lead the sheep to a fresher patch of grass, or pet them and whisper sweet nothings into their ears.
you didn't think she’d ever notice you, but spotting a red cloak in a forest of green was never that hard.
“hey! you there!” she called out, startling you out from behind the tree.
you froze, not knowing what to do. you didn’t want to hurt anyone, not after everything that happened.
“don’t think i can’t see you, come out right this instant!” she commanded, although she was only 12, she spoke with a tone you couldn’t ignore.
you pulled your hood over your head to cover your ears, and tucked your tail into your pants, making you seem “normal” as you walked out from the forest.
you stand awkwardly in the clearing, arms stiff at your sides, hood pulled so low that you can barely see past 2 feet in front of you. the shepherd girl marches straight up to you, hands on her hips, like she’s not even a little scared of the stranger lurking in the woods.
“why are you creeping in the woods? you know you are terrible at it, the red totally gives you away.” she points at your cloak.
your mouth goes dry. you haven’t talked to anyone for months, your tongue feels foreign as you try to speak.
“i wasn’t- i wasn’t creeping,” you stammer as heat crawled up your neck.
she circles you once, squinting in mock suspicion. “well! i’m sophia.” she sticks out her hand. “and you are?”
you open your mouth to answer, to say your name, but it comes out as more of a mumble of noises than any words.
sophia blinks. “um, once again i don’t think i caught that.”
you try again, somehow even quieter.
she snorts. “okay yeah, i didn’t catch a single syllable of that. soooo~” her eyes sparkle, “i’m just gonna call you y/n/n. nice cloak you got!”
your cloak. your grandmother’s cloak.
her hand reaches toward you, fingers brushing the frayed edge of the tear, the tear from that night, and she frowns softly. “it’s ripped here, i can fix this if you-”
you yank the fabric away so fast your hood nearly flies off your head.
she jumps back, hands raised immediately. “woah! i’m sorry. i wasn’t gonna ruin it or anything.”
your heart pounds, your ears flatten against your head, hidden under your hood, but sophia just gives you a small, apologetic smile. like she’s not scared of you. like she’s not suspicious. like she just wants to help.
and for some reason, that makes you stay.
the days blur together after that.
sophia decides you are friends, she drags you through fields filled with waist high grass, challenging you to races you always win but pretend to lose. she shows you how to weave flower crowns, though yours always come out lopsided and she insists they have “wabi sabi”. whatever that might mean.
sometimes she catches you looking at her and smiles like it’s the easiest thing in the world.
for the first time in a long time, you feel something warm in your chest that isn’t hunger.
the only thing that was an issue lately was the sheep.
the sheep hated you.
the moment you come even a step closer, they bolt in the opposite direction. bleating and panicking, as if they were shouting for their lives.
you would be lying if you said they didn’t look appetizing at times.
“wow,” sophia says with her hands on her hips. “they really don’t like you. they’re usually only this dramatic when they see thunder or like a wolf.”
you shrink into your cloak. “maybe.. they’re just skittish.”
“yeah. probably.” she shrugs, tossing a handful of hay toward them. “they’re weirdos.”
as the seasons changed, your cloak would get caught on bushes and sticks as sophia chased you around. you always ensured that your cloak stayed pulled up, your tail tucked in. even when it started wagging frantically at the sight of sophia.
how would it not?
sophia smells like sheep, grass, sunshine, everything and anything good you could possibly think of.
you smell like…
you pull your cloak tighter against your body.
nevermind what you smell like.
it was just a regular day, sitting under a tree as you both looked into the field of dandelions. at times like these you forgot about the tail that begged to be free and the ears that hid themselves shamefully under your cloak.
“why do you have this cloak all the time? let me try it on!” sophia teased as she pulled the cloak off of you.
your ears perking up and immediately flattening on your head, trying to make themselves invisible but you know the damage is already done.
you can’t breathe. can’t think. can’t stay.
not again.
not again not again not again-
you ran away before you could see her reaction.
before she could shout and look at you in disgust, you rip yourself away from her grasp, sprinting into the trees. your cloak snags on a root but you don’t stop, you don’t dare stop.
your cloak tears free and slips off your shoulders entirely, falling onto the dirt behind you. from afar you swear you could hear a voice shout, “wolf! there’s a wolf!”
man you just mess everything up.
it was as if something compelled her to shout.
“wolf! there’s a wolf!” sophia shouted, running in the opposite direction towards her sheep.
her mother came running out of the cottage, to find her little girl running towards her frantically.
“mom there was a wolf! i-” she was going to tell her mom that you were the wolf but, she stopped.
she almost said it was her, the girl in the forest.
she almost said it was you.
sophia’s mother only looked at her disappointingly, “i thought you grew out of this, stop lying about a wolf when there isn’t one.”
sophia stared at the ground, fists clenched in her dress.
“…okay,” she whispered.
and it hurt. because for the first time, she wasn’t lying.
sophia stood at the forest’s edge long after you’ve disappeared, your cloak in her hand as she looks into the forest. the same forest that she first saw you in.
except this time you weren’t there.
the forest only stared back.
empty.
cold.
too quiet.
that night she sat by the fireplace in her cottage, her mother asking why she was up so late.
“i’m just fixing something up for a… friend.” sophia mumbled, avoiding the gaze of her mother as she continued sewing the cloak, repairing the tear from all those nights ago.
she tied off the last thread and brushed her thumb over the seam.
“i’m sorry,” she whispered to the empty room.
not just for the cloak.
for shouting.
for freezing.
for pushing you away.
the day after the incident you had found yourself waking up next to a tree somewhere in the forest, trying to get lost. to never find your way back to her. to never risk hurting her.
but there was this pull that always led you back to the edge of the forest. to the same edge where you met her.
and there you found your red cloak on the ground, with a note laid on top.
“i haven’t told a soul it was you, i’m sorry.”
you stood there frozen as tears welled up in your eyes. she had fixed the rips and tears that had accumulated over the past year.
sophia was your first and only friend.
and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss her.
you drape the cloak around your shoulders and for the first time you don't lift the hood up to cover your ears. it somehow feels warmer than before as you wrap it tighter around you.
it smells like her.
okay no need to be creepy. you think to yourself, shaking your head.
but there’s just something that always drags you back to the same spot you met all those months ago.
the next morning, sophia stands at her window with sleep in her eyes
she expects nothing.
she expects empty.
she expects the same quiet ache she’s been waking up with ever since you disappeared.
but instead she sees the red hue of your cloak, staring back at her from the forest.
not imagined.
not remembered.
real.
her breath catches. her heart forgets how to beat.
“y/n/n,” she whispers.
and before she had time to think she took off running. barefoot and breathless but with the biggest smile on her face.
“Y/N/N I THOUGHT YOU LEFT FOREVER!” she shouts before lunging herself onto you, leading you both crashing into the ground.
you could only stare up at her as you saw the tears well up in her eyes and fall onto your face.
“hey watch it!” you angrily but you both know there's no malice behind your words.
sophia started crying before she even realized she was doing it.
“i’m sorry,” she sobbed into your shoulder, the words spilling out broken and fast. “i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry.”
you tried to answer her, but your voice refused to obey you. all you could do was hold her and cry into her hair, clinging to her in a desperate, silent way that said everything your mouth could not.
then the forest filled with voices.
sophia froze instantly, her body going unbearably tense in your arms as someone shouted her name from beyond the trees. you heard it too, you already knew what was going to happen.
big bad wolves don't get happy endings.
your ears pressed flat against your head without you even thinking about it, and your tail curled tightly around your leg.
sophia stood quickly and moved in front of you before you could even think to stop her. her small body drew itself up like it meant to shield you from the entire world.
when her mother emerged from the trees with several others behind her, the relief in her face vanished the moment she saw you.
“get away from it,” her mother cried, her expression filled with disgust as she could see your ears. someone behind her muttered that you weren’t human. another demanded where the woodsman was so he could chop off your head.
you reached out for sophia one last time, a slight tug at her wrist. not because you wanted to take her with you, but because you wanted to look at her one last time, to pretend like there wasn’t an angry mob of villagers waiting to behead you.
you turned and ran into the forest that had taken you in once before, disappearing into the darkness that had always claimed creatures like you in the end.
behind you, sophia screamed your name.
this was one of the times you wished you didn't have keen hearing, because her shouts for you followed you into the forest.
maybe in another story, you would get your fairy tale happy ending.
casting director huh yunjin is desperately trying to find the perfect seymour krelborn after practically begging on her knees to get sophia laforteza to play as audrey for the school's upcoming musical theater event. little did she know, the perfect seymour was with her all this time; raging to stardew valley and animal crossing.
Hi lhei hope u have a wonderful weekend ahead 🤍 Also with your studies (I’m crying doing calculus rn but it’s all good) ALSO WE GOT SUDDENLY YN BONUS CHAPTERS HELL YH 😝 UR THE BEST!!! Now all u have to do is…. make yvi and yn make up 🥹🫶🏼
hello, my dearest willow 💚 i'm almost done with my first semester thank fuck 😭 calculus and physics were the bane of my freshman existence, i wish you all the brain and willpower to pull through with that! i hope you have a great weekend too, bebe 💚
that sophia pic really gave me the motivation, honestly 😩 as for yvi and y/n... we shall see !!!
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