Conclave 2024 is good

Maria.She/Her or Berry/Berries.22.Aro.Conclave sideblog self proclaimed CEO of Woeldict aka Woelki and Benedict XIV.

[langernameohnebedeutung]

Schism? Schism today?

[langernameohnebedeutung]

🍿

[turuin]

Wow, I didn't have "catholic schism" on my 2026 bingo card

[mygogglesdosomething]

Schism today

[epersonae]

Actually, let me add some context

There are several groups of traditionalist Catholics that have been pissed since something called Vatican 2, which updated a bunch of practices and official positions, and one group of those is called The Society of Saint Pius X. Their leader was excommunicated in 1988 for making bishops (?) without permission.

Those bishops are now hella old, so they decided to make some more, and the pope said that was automatic excommunication. (excommunication matters both as a matter of theology (sacraments performed aren't valid) and economics (the church stops giving them money, can take back property, etc))

Pope said don't, and they did, and now: schism?????

Apparently they claim not to be sedevacantists ("pope's not valid"), but idek what else you would call this.

Article from the Vatican press office (calling them Lefebvrians is apparently itself a diss, as that is the name of the founder and emphasizes the cult of personality aspect)

Excellent bluesky thread liveblogging the consecration (must be logged in, I think? Screenshots are highlights)

Tl;dr, from the replies to that thread

[flowerpowergoth]

Just watched conclave and I loved it!!! Have some conclave art!

[bunburysqueaks]

"I am what God made me"

[commiefaggoth]

so embarrassing to watch yourself become obsessed with a character that feels tailor made for you specifically to become obsessed with. feels like i fell into a trap made just for me. like damn they got me. those are all the things i like and go crazy for

[solonetz]

Furries

[floursend]

i love you anon. bnuuy and ouppy

[bird-metaphor]

Brother Cardinal

[bird-metaphor]

hehehe

[vicente-benetiz]

yeah new blog title cause my Conclave 2024 hype is back

Can't wait to write the sequel to The Caged Lark which has been on a year long hiatus and will take much longer cause I'm working on a Miraculous Ladybug fic with elements from my Caged Lark AU (think evil clergymen )

The Rainer Woelki and Tedesco for the Miraculous Ladybug fic is the former Archbishop of Paris and the President of France

anyway time to scroll through the Lawrence/Benitez tag

[omgkatsudonplease]

Today Pope Leo XIV met with newly-created bishops who are here for their annual “baby bishop school” training session.

When he was Cardinal Prevost, Pope Leo actually worked with Cardinal Tagle to have joint sessions so that bishops all over the world could meet one another regardless of geographic location. Prior to 2024, bishops from North and South America, Europe, and the Eastern Churches trained together with the Dicastery for Bishops and bishops from Africa, Oceania, and Asia trained with the Dicastery for Evangelisation.

So basically this is his and Chito’s baby

[li0nc4ndy]

It’s almost 2026 and I’m still tagvost pilled

[klien2000]

Itinalagang sombrero nila🦁🍬~~

[li0nc4ndy]

I’m in the pits of hell now 😭

[alias-milamber]

Some notes on getting a new pope:

* As depicted in the movie Conclave, voting for the new pope is held in secret. The only clue as to who voted for the current pope is to see which direction they face when leaving the Sistine Chapel. This is known as Cardinality.

* In order to make sure no bribes are taking place, the voting block must conduct all their transactions using the vatican's own ecommerce system, Papal.

* No communication is allowed from the chapel while the voting is taking place. The only clues are from the chimney: black smoke indicates a failed vote, white smoke indicates a new pope, and red smoke indicates that the conclave needs pizza.

* The ashes of former non-canonised popes are mixed with flower petals and essential oils to provide a pleasant and holy atmosphere for debate. This is known as popeourri

* There is usually about an hour between the election of the pope and their first appearance on the balcony of the basilica. This is to give them time to sign the poperwork.

* Several times during history sects have taken the opportunity of a papal election to declare their own leaders as the new head of the church. Should one of these alternates shake hands with a vatican-elected pope, both men vanish.

* The announcement of the new pope is the template for modern gender reveal parties, and this isn’t even in the top twenty worst things the apostolic Catholic Church is responsible for.

* There is no historical basis for the pope’s testicular check being done by having a chair with a hole in the seat, and I say this because I went to write one of these based on that and checked first, and now the papacy is a little less funny to me, and isn’t that the point of this exercise?

* The official name for the countdown listing of candidates for the pontifex position is known as “Top of the Popes”

* While a pope speaking from the Throne can speak the word of God, it is not a paid position from which he will earn money.

* All ghosts are removed from the chapel between each day of the conclave to stop them reporting on any progress, which is the point of that exorcise.

* Since 1929 the seat of the pontifex hasn’t failed to elect a new pope. It isn’t the Vatican’t.

* The announcement of a new pope is accompanied by a musical chord that is believed to be pleasing to the divine ear. It is known as the Holy C.

[fubkakky]

[bethoftheblvd]

gab

[zuppisglasses]

MiniZuppi in my pocket plzzzzz

[veerierir]

open commission :D

lawrence is happy as long as he has benitez next to him :>