Emily

• "Tell me every terrible thing you ever did and let me love you anyway." • 20 • she/her/hers • Writer, poet, artist • that's the most! •

[animentality]

[safire-lupe]

No paperwork was ever completed that night.

Tea was good though.

(And something else was better 😉)

[tall]

[fleetwood-mac-andcheese]

[itsbasil]

you put those tags on this post where they belong

[its-funnytwittertweets]

[dragonpyre]

[risk-repeater]

this job market is a fucking nightmare

[memeuplift]

[kosmogrl]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[ilynpilled]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[pulim-v]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[meangirlnurse]

i must say that i do really like it when reddit users look through other redditors' post history so they can do violence to them

[meangirlnurse]

[unpeeled-human]

cosmo, wanda, i want you to spawn a piece of radioactive plutonium in that person's stomach

[unpeeled-human]

cosmo. wanda. enough with the semantics

[pocketmau5]

I spent way longer on this than I should have

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

How fine is the line on can’t kill anybody? Because that will kill someone, it just wouldn’t be, like, immediately.

[eternal-fractal]

Iirc I heard in one episode, he tried to use a wish to kill a pop star that pissed him off, but because of the book of rules, the absolute worst thing he could do to intentionally wish harm on someone was for him to take too long to find a parking spot.

[towel-deactivated20260115]

[targetedknowledge]

[byjove]

here are some additional requirements I would add to the United States presidency:

you are not eligible for the presidency if you are over the age of 65, if you turn 65 in office, that is fine but you cannot campaign if you are over 65

you cannot be president if you are a felon

you cannot be president if you have a personal net worth over $8 million

you cannot be presidency if you have had to file for bankruptcy in a business venture

you cannot be president if you cannot pass a basic neurological exam

you cannot be president if you have been convicted of or found liable for any sex crime, domestic violence or sexual harassment. unproven allegations are cause for investigation and can result in immediate termination from office if proven.

you cannot be president if you have been divorced more than once

you cannot be president if you never smoked weed out of a soda can in high school

you have to be up to date on all of your shots and forklift certification

[steadyangelcharger]

ageism, ableism, and felon disenfranchisement...

I'm so glad this isn't a serious post.

[byjove]

I do not think our president should be a dementia ridden senior citizen with no regard for the law lol. Misuse whatever buzz words you want, the government should reflect the best interests of the people and not the whims of a downright evil 80 year old who has made a career out of scamming people and should be in a memory care facility.

[shortwaveradioenthusiast]

[kingedwardsapphires]

Me stepping out of the optometry office after slamming four lokos with the doctor and immediately meeting the love of my life (but I have social anxiety)

[bookhobbit]

The first rule of sewing is you can fix anything if you have patience, creativity, and a little bit of extra fabric! The second rule of sewing is AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

[redstonedust]

what happened to "cool as fuck grandma" as a character trope. i miss "cool as fuck grandma"

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

Language is universal

[kevytmaitohorsma]

Finnish trains have a different diet

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

Little-known fact: although most people believe trains to be herbivores, they are actually opportunistic omnivores and will consume meat should it be made readily available.

[kirkendauhl-v2]

Peer reviewed

[sisterreisaid]

I see Finland has solved the trolley problem