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@waltzingwhimsy
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Hello! I'm Wallace Hunters, I am a 27 year old step mother to seven swans stepsons and a beautiful stepdaughter. Queen consort by day, witch by night, knitter by hobby. I have killed 13 people and will kill more.
I will never share a donation post so stop asking
previous url: 11BountyHunters
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Speak no evil. Hear no evil. See no evil.
sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.
The reason why so many of y'all's feminism sucks is because you still believe deep down in your hearts that there are only two kinds of people in the world: precious, ethereal, fragile dollthings called "women", and violent, lustful, rage-fueled apes called "men". Until you throw that idea away, 3rd-grade-tier "girls rule boys drool, girls are princesses and boys are stinky :(" is as feminist as we'll ever get-- and I hope it's obvious that that's lightyears away from the bare minimum of where we need to be.
imagine if you will, a fairly dry survival crafting game in which you live in a bunker and must periodically venture out to scavenge food, set up turrets for attacking monsters, etc
now, your computer inside the bunker has a game-inside-a-game on it which is a charming farming sim of undeniably greater quality and scope than the survival game you're playing. therefore, the object of the game becomes to keep your bunker secure so you can play the farming game more.
now, once you achieve the highest rating in the farming game, a secret shop inside it unlocks, and one of the novelty items you can purchase is a game console, giving you access to games-inside-a-game-inside-a-game. most of the games for it are typical mobile shovelware, but one of them is a highly polished, extremely brutal precision platformer with amazing level design and production values exceeding that of the survival game and farming sim combined.
it is only at this point that the purpose of this entire contrivance becomes clear: to create the most deranged speedrun community the world has ever seen.
That one tumblr post about supine vs prone constantly haunts me. I’ll be reading a fic that’s like:
[character a] pushes [character b] onto his back, then straddles his prone body
meanwhile I’m reading like: he’s not lying on his pronis, he’s lying on his s(u)pine…
Every day I handle more money than I will ever make. Every day.
At the start of my employment, my boss showed me videos of people stealing, and we both had a chuckle about it. How silly they were! There was a camera overhead, and it’s not to watch the shoppers. See, we can’t actually stop shoplifters. They get away with it maybe nine out of ten times. But we, who are watched and tallied and witnessed? We are always caught.
At first it was hard to hold one hundred dollars bills. An amount I had never seen before. An amount that didn’t exist in my household. It’s normal now. Here is something that is not for me.
“What the hell, I’ll take another,” says the man, pondering our 200 dollar watches. What the hell. Total comes to 580 and not even a flinch in his face. I have been working for 11 hours today and made only 110 dollars. It will go to my rent. Today I work for free, it feels. When I get my check, I will have 35 dollars left for food and saving.
The six hundreds he hands me go into the cash register. For a moment, I imagine having money. Then I put it away, counting out his change.
I know for a fact we sell our products for double what they are worth. That I could be making commission. That they could hand me those 580 dollars and change my life and not even mark the difference in their checkbooks. He’s not the only sale they make today, but I am the reason they made it. He’s not the only one spending 600 dollars, but if I hadn’t spent two hours with him telling me about his life, he wouldn’t have spent any. I go home. I don’t own a watch.
I have watched and rewatched a video on how to make salmon four ways. My shopping list is always the same. Pasta. Rice. Tuna. If I can afford butter it was a good week. I dream of the world I will never walk in, where I can throw the best fish fillet in the cart with a shrug. I hold hundreds in my hand and look up at the camera. I put them under the cash drawer.
I go to work. I scrap together my savings. I eat my bowl of rice slowly. My manager takes a paid week off from work just for his birthday. He owns a yacht.
I’m not worth the cost of a watch.
i wrote this while i was working at orlando’s walt disney world parks.
i was part of their college program. i moved to the state for it. they legally owned the building i was living in and still charged me rent. i ostensibly was being charged to work for them. it was a 2 bedroom apartment and they placed 6 adult women in it in forced triples.
as many as one in ten disney employees have experienced homelessness while working for the company. despite huge efforts to unionize, strike, or otherwise demand fair treatment; disney has refused to increase employee quality of life.
disney admits publicly that a good portion of their success is because the employees (“cast members”) are dedicated, passionate, and selfless. this is never reflected in pay. even “face” characters (ie those that are princesses etc) make barely above a minimum wage.
at the time that i worked there, i made $8.50 an hour. at one point i was asked to create a human shield around a bag because a bomb dog had alerted to it. for eight fucking dollars an hour.
i now work a very cushy office job. i have bought the salmon and cooked it all four ways.
i go to the store. i am nice to the person behind the counter. she looks up at the camera while she counts out my change. there is nothing fundamentally different about her and i.
we are both worth more than the watch, anyway.
i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges
why can’t my life be like animal crossing. i wanna be surrounded by overly friendly anthropomorphic furries who accept my broke millennial ass as their mayor picking up shitty seashells off the beach and gross bugs as a valid source of income
Honestly all Nintendo needs to do to make Animal Crossing for Switch the best game in the franchise yet is give it all of the features as New Leaf, the character customisation of Happy Home Designer, and GIVE CELESTE HER OBSERVATORY BACK
Actor over 40: action hero, love interest to 20-something female protagonist, superhero, dramatic lead, half of a buddy comedy duo, head of important organization, complex villain
Actress over 40: somebody’s mother
I stopped writing my Hamlet RA to post this bc I’m pretending I need a 2-minute break
I can’t keep living this lie.
This post was directed specifically at how hard it is for me to figure out the neck bone. I have little to no problem drawing Papyrus, which is what this post turned to at some point, and that wasn’t my original intention. My relatability is a lie.
In honesty, it is Sans I have difficulty with, Toriel being the only one to top that. Papyrus is very fun to draw and I do so frequently, the scarf keeping me from having to figure out if/how his vertebrae connect to his skull.
Oh wow, it’s got 2,500 notes now!?
Yeah, Sans is really the hard skeleton to draw. And they’re all easier with scarves and turtlenecks.
By the way, the dress is also Frisk’s.
Sans is a fucking wardrobe thieving imp and no one can tell me otherwise.
Booker what do u even do
Alright team, since guitar drawing is apparently a universal struggle across the COCO-verse, here’s a tutorial on what I’ve learned about guitars this evening.
Enjoy, and may your musical fanarts flourish confidently!
