Just another day in paradise

Where I try to get the courage to post my story ideas She/Her Born in the late 1900’s

[warhorny-on-main]

God I'm old

Here I am trying to figure out Tumblr again, and then I get the fun realization that I had no idea what the hell I was doing the last time either, which is why I gave up. So to give you all a heads up, if you see me mysteriously stalking your page all of the sudden, I promise I'm mostly harmless.

Yakuza/Like a Dragon, Fallout, and Warhammer 30/40K are my jams. I'm a lore nut, but I don't care if anybody holds to it or not, Lord knows I don't when it's inconvenient.

I know this isn't everybody's jam, but I personally ship Primarch x Primarch, as well as Primarch x Astartes, so if you're not a fan, when I start actually putting stories down, I'll make sure to tag them as best I can.

[warhorny-on-main]

If you kick me hard enough, I'll write a weird ass crossover where an Imperial Fist is tortured by xenos. And actually post it

You have my undivided attention.

Bruh, I will become a goddamn Rockette to learn to give a proper high kick if that’s what it’ll take to be able to read that.

[diabolicalevil]

[warhorny-on-main]

And it doesn’t help when you have an old copy of a book, and don’t realize that the reprint got edited and altered in some new way so now you HAVE to reread it to actually be at least somewhat accurate with the lore.

[fujoshisororitas]

just skip straight to the end and the death. surely you will not regret having your first warhammer novel be the end and the death. kind friend the end and the death wants to tell you a story about love and tragedy and the collapse of empires. no need to understand greater plot ramifications only malcador and the emperor tragic doomed love. read the rest later

[warhorny-on-main]

Malcador ascending those stairs definitely made me teary eyed. And I will join you in crying over it all going so wrong so badly, and it all being so unreasonably unfair.

But I screwed up in reading Warhammer because I first read The Infinite and the Divine. I had no idea of what I was getting my dumb ass into, and the whiplash was so real when I started reading Dead Men Walking because I wanted to read more about Necrons!

[diabolicalevil]

[warhorny-on-main]

And it doesn’t help when you have an old copy of a book, and don’t realize that the reprint got edited and altered in some new way so now you HAVE to reread it to actually be at least somewhat accurate with the lore.

[lost-carcosa]

[warhorny-on-main]

Please please please let him win. Let at least one election, even though it doesn't affect me in the slightest, restore just a tiny bit of my faith in humanity.

[catabibaz0n]

imagine this if you will, your the most unfortunate serf in the world and you just tripped into the bathing pool of calgar and guilliman and now you’re squished between the two hottest men in the galaxy (and their fat tits) (excuse my vulgarity, i am inspired)

The bathhouse floor is unfortunately slippery even the most dexterous of serfs would have difficulties let alone you! Thank goodness your Lords were there to catch you or else you may have drowned in the water.

[warhorny-on-main]

I fear that it might be harder than I thought to get out of that tub, and I might need some time to recuperate before getting out.

[warhorny-on-main]

My random question for the day

[catabibaz0n]

Can you draw a primarch of your choosing working minimum wage

I'm in unemployment hell and I need someone to suffer with me

There would only be one who could survive in such a vicious, grinding environment… Perturabo.

Also Morty, but he would definitely not be allowed to be customer facing.

[warhorny-on-main]

Perturabo trapped in fast food hell while dealing with the masses and not being able to kill them, or his manager? Ouuuuuuuch.

Especially since you know he’s the one who gets called in all the time when someone else calls out because he’s compelled to come in to show he’s better than the lazy slackers he works with. And we all know what happens to the ‘reliable’ one.

[chemos-factories]

writing is like trying to pull a single beautiful fine silk thread out of my brain but it was stored improperly and now there’s a bunch of tangles in it and i have to. untangle those periodically. and im arranging the thread into the shape of a penis

[warhorny-on-main]

Why am I being specifically targeted here? I do not care for this sensation of being called out.

[warhorny-on-main]

can you tag your pxp or pxa posts so I can filter it

Sure can! I've got no problem doing that at all.

[warhorny-on-main]

EYYYYY YOOOOOO! Lookie at what I got!

This was made by the most talented @moj-cien!

[coleslaw-frosting]

I love Binface so much.

[warhorny-on-main]

Where is the American Binface when we need him?

[sweepingstars]

> called warhammer 40k

> not a single war hammer in sight

Whats up with that

So there's this guy

They call him peter turbo

He has this thing--

[warhorny-on-main]

Art by niellustrate @ x.com

Dom’t forget about the big daddy of hammer swingers too! His brother Konrad did and look what happened to him!

[warhorny-on-main]

So this is real, and I just had to subject myself to it, because why wouldn’t I?

Great, now I have to find a VA willing to even work with me on a script without laughing hysterically at me the entire time…

[aggressivemenaceowo]

Good night my sweethearts 🌙

[handedsanitiser]

Is this real lol it's too good to be true

@primarchpenissucker

[aggressivemenaceowo]

It's real. Whole ass channel

[warhorny-on-main]

I have no words. Tears, hysterical laughter, but no words. The internet is a strange and terrifying place.

[drbigsadbabymd-blog]

I swear to god 90% of Warhammer fanfiction on Ao3 falls into three categories

1. "Mackenzie, an unremarkable barista from Des Moines, finds herself in an unusual predictament: she's awoken in the midst of the Horus Heresy?? And now Sanguinius is in love with her?? Can Mackenzie save the galaxy...and heal the heart of the ninth Primarch??"

2. Toxic Yaoi

3. 那是中文写的，所以你根本看不懂。内容或许精彩绝伦，或许烂得要命，但你永远都不会知道，对吧？你这个美国蠢货。你那点高中水平的西班牙语都说不利索，你这无知又邋遢的蠢猪，注定永远无法揭开这个网站上那上百万篇中文同人小说的奥秘。

And if those don't work for you, well then...damn. Damn, that sucks. Thats rough.

[warhorny-on-main]

Not going to lie, this is when self hosting a translation abominable intelligence has saved me. Because damned if I’m going to miss out on some good ass horny posting because of a language barrier!

[wh40ksummerfest]

WH40K Summer Fest Exchange: Deadline in 48 hours

Masterpost | Ask | AO3 & Rules | AO3 Automagic App

The deadline for submitting your gift is this Sunday, August 2, at 3:59pm GMT | 5:59pm CEST | 11:59am EDT | 8:59am PDT (deadline countdown).

That's two days from the time this post goes live!

🌎🦅⭐ Americans! Don't forget to set your alarm – this is Sunday morning for you guys. ⭐🦅🌎

If the deadline absolutely doesn't work for you, e-mail us at [email protected] to let us know and figure out a fix. 😊

[warhorny-on-main]

Thank you for the reminder! I just got mine in. And now I'm terrified. Mostly because I've never actually publicly posted a fic before.