🦷👁🦷👁🦷👁🦷 @watcher-evervigilant - Tumblr Blog

It's interesting that talking about how transmascs are incentivized to participate in misogyny is "dividing the community" and a "CIA psyop", but them actually participating in that misogyny isn't.

Anyways I was dropping shit off at the thrift and impulsively came home w 2 chairs bc they were $10 and ive been looking for chairs to put in my new little area for my dog and I bc I liked the frames and they felt good to sit in but they are Not outside chairs at all

#the upholstery is done v nicely but its not entirely my thing. i want to strip the paint. stain them dark.#and only when the fabric is worn out will i change it out. but im wondering if some weatherproofing sealant on the wood will work #and if i can wax seal the fabric for a temporary waterproofing solution #i should not have done this but the frames reminded me of home

I have no idea what to do w my v long mohawk to more effectively indicate freak status wo doing a fuckass yolandi mullet

#i do Not understand wanting to emulate a woman who sexually abused her adopted kids #the immense popularity of that style is uh. definitely a hm.#but anyways. i keep getting read as a soft cishet woman and it is driving me up the fucking wall #and i just want something i can wear down or tied up w no product and still adequately gives off freak

Augh I need to clean my apartment before ppl come over to visit my dog but also now knowing my knee is like Actually Fucked in a can't heal on its own way and my migraine meds are only doing So Much (ive had 3 migraines this week which means 3 days lost, 3 days recovering) and a hyperawareness of my food situation rn and how surgery bone healing is going (my body is actively destroying itself to heal the bonegrafting, which is healing v v well, just slower than it should), im being far far gentler w myself than I have ever been. I keep looking at certain things and going actually I Should ask my partner for help.

#i am. so fucking excited. to do a custom knee brace fitting. you have no idea how many years ive been wanting that #part of me is like ok i need a drafting stool w wheels and a grabby stick. i could still get shit done w that wo hurting myself

therockywhorerpictureshow

Is it a universal medication-taker experience to swallow your pills and then five minutes later completely blank and wonder if you’ve actually taken them or if you took the wrong ones

maererme

buriedknight

executioner Pasqal appreciation 🩸

orteil42

biting off more than i can chew. but. well. i guess i like to bite

Well in the positive of all of this, I Am finally learning how to rest and not push my body too hard.

chateauofmymind

have you ever suddenly + involuntarily lost consciousness

yes (fainted)

yes (head trauma)

yes (substance-induced)

yes (lack of oxygen)

yes (blood loss)

yes (multiple)

no

Remaining time: 3 days 11 hours

#head trauma. drugs. lack of oxygen. and fainting #also blood but not bc it was a medically significant amount of blood loss. rather the smell and constant swapping out gauze got me

I keep trying to type my thoughts on send help and I cant get it under like 3500 words. Its Massive bc I have to give a detailed breakdown and then also its how the parts relate to each other that is part of what pisses me off (it is So misogynistic and has this weird 'see? Abused women are monstrous murderers' thing going on that actively undermines it) besides my own complete disdain for the techniques used

The problem is I am naturally verbose and if im going to hate on something I make sure my hate is fucking full of citations and substantial and also I am cursed w a brain that does not let shit go until I work it out of my system and yes this is exhausting for me to deal with. I would Love to be a person who just goes it sucks and walks away but no, I am not that bitch. You do not know the depths of my hating bc I mercifully shield you from it, nor do you know the sheer range of works that fill that space

#idk why my brain is stuck on this extremely nothingburger of a movie. i wanted it to go places and it didnt #idgaf sam raimi made evil dead and the grudge. they suck! they suck so hard! there are a thousand horror movies better than 1 hes made #oh hes a horror mainstay. for the weak fucks who are too scared to touch anything substantial #i rank him on the same level as cabin in the woods. which is to say dogshit tier not worth a second of my time #the problem is the premise of this could be so good! if literally anyone but him or the other aforementioned idiot jackass did it #oh but its comedy. the thing is you have to actually be funny to pull off horror comedy. which he has never managed #also his massively inflated sense of self importance and cleverness is deeply grating #heres the thing abt trying to fuck w expectations. you have to actually subvert them otherwise you are just wasting my time

Honestly im always fascinated by all these comments from medical professionals abt how ppls anger at their profession is leading to burnout in conversations abt medical neglect and harm and its like. OK. As in all discussions of systemic harm and violence, personal feelings of Anyone in the position of power are negligible bc it isnt abt you and that in this context is a derailment to prioritize your feelings over the actual harm and death caused by a systemic problem you are a, and this is a crucial piece, willing participant in and are actively financially profiting from. And the fact ppl dont understand that drives me up the wall.

#adjacently im also super sick of disability conversations that are Super white. Black ppl are killed when we are merely dismissed #your analysis of the situation is always going to fail when you refuse to even acknowledge racism #this whole Thing im going thru brought to you by reading a decade of medical records proving real physical injuries #being completely ignored due to deformity and the subsequent psychiatrization every professional kept adding to #and i thought it was normal misogyny and not my face was actively a barrier to even being examined

5th mandatory surgery confirmed. I have a severe meniscus tear that was previously found as minor in an MRI from hs that was never acknowledged or treated and has gotten massively worse over 15yrs of use that you should not be putting on a meniscus tear.

#i was fucking told it was fibro and to take max dose acetaminophen forever.#so now the question is is my meniscus repairable or does it need to be completely replaced #and i have some... feelings. abt receiving donor parts from a corpse. that i know are entirely my own Weird abt death

Im going to become the joker. The level of medical neglect i keep finding ive been put through is just. Mind-boggling.

bebsi-cola

it's ironic that ableds love using disabled people for inspiration porn but hate actually giving the vast majority of disabled people the tools and accommodation to facilitate disabled people doing more with their time. it's almost like the point of it isn't to inspire but to create a false narrative that disability can be overcome with strength of will because look at these people who did it! now stop asking for help

xenogears

Shout out to the (many) times I got called an elitist gatekeeper for saying that the only real way to fully understand a work of fiction is to experience it firsthand and that summaries and reviews are not a replacement for that

the-lincyclopedia

Me, reading the first 80% of the post: What do you mean, "experience it firsthand"? How am I supposed to join the Hunger Games or go on the Odyssey?

Me, reading the final clause of the post: Oh, you literally meant that people have to read the book/listen to the audiobook in order to fully understand it. And people got mad. Oh dear.

marisatomay

To quote what a friend of mine said after she watched Jerry Maguire (1996) for the first time, having thought she knew what it was about because of its cultural ubiquity: “you miss a lot of a movie when you don’t watch it”

#this is precisely why my line is 'you forfeit the right to discuss horror media if you havent touched the works in question'#like strong no playing telephone allowed here. oh you read the wiki for xyz notorious horror film? youre not allowed to speak sorry #esp when ppl extrapolate completely off base if not outright the exact opposite takes on certain horror films that say their shit straight #summaries merely state happenings but not the context angle or tone or what any of it means and why

Having migraine wo aura is so annoying. I cant tell at all when im in the prodrome phase bc thats just being chronically ill so when a migraine hits, I feel like im fine im fine im fine and then im suddenly hit by a car. I would LOVE a little warning before im struck.

#im also stuck in another mcas flare cycle where i cant seem to get it to stop and something keeps reactivating it but idk what #but i Did get serious sensory overload twice in the last 24hrs one of which was an MRI and we had another 40° temp shift #which im learning my body hates esp when the shift is from hot to cold #when i was on T i absolutely understood the pots heat intolerance thing but i Dont have that when im not on T. im always freezing

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