definitely not a one piece reference

whatever i want blog

[hauntedhotel]

Me, on the welcome desk in the library: Good morning, how are you today?

Customer: I have welcomed Jesus into my heart and so I am well today and every day.

Me, a little unnerved: Okay then! Is there something I can help you with?

Customer, digging around in his bag and pulling out an iPhone in a box: Unfortunately, Jesus can't help me with this fucking phone, so I came to the library.

[gallusrostromegalus]

The Library!

For When Not Even God Can Help You!

[gnomic-sans]

Lapsed Christian and ALA-accredited MLIS-holder here, in absolute agreement that smartphones are outside the sight and scope of the Lord, and that sometimes when there was only one set of footprints, you were carried by a librarian

[lovergf]

haha nooooo don’t recreate puritanism under the guise of progressivism because you don’t have critical thinking skills like for realllll stopppp haha

[undeadhousewife]

[cocainesocialist]

lilith here making the iron clad case for free public transport

[nyctibiius]

she has been pickled for her crimes

[guooey]

[sandmanalone]

The spirit of Mouse compelled me:

[marisatomay]

People will claim to be a fan of some thing and then hate all of the themes and motifs and story lines and plot lines and protagonists and antagonists like man I don’t think that you actually like it here

[fliesinthescreen]

mom called me a fag yesterday by accident

[fliesinthescreen]

she was going to call me a bitch (playful) and i saw her gears turning like no but he's trans i need to call him the male equivalent. and then say fag and look so so surprised at the word that came out of her own mouth. it was like watching someone fail a disco elysium skill check irl

[fliesinthescreen]

AUTHORITY - One of your sons is being annoying to the other. Make it clear that you think this is unfair.

YOU - "Stop being a b--"

REACTION SPEED [Challenging: Success] - Wait a minute.

DRAMA - Sire, the word you're about to use is historically feminine! Applying it to your transgender child is tantamount to misgendering him.

1. [Suggestion - Legendary 14] Think of a masculine equivalent to "bitch."

[neurotypicalite]

theres a pink blue and white flower at rhe grocery store i have to make. a joke

[neurotypicalite]

call that a transplant

[soapbbox]

It’s all puppies forever in New York, you guys are so lucky 😭

[horseshoe-crab-yaoi]

fuckkkk dude i think my propaganda puppet is becoming self aware... i gotta turn my opera signer back into an Evil Fucking Nurse

[swoony-spoonie]

When the brain fog kicks in..

[brittlepredatordemon]

Actually, no, I don't think that friendships dropping like flies in your late 20s and early 30s because no one has time for that between overwork and family obligations and marriage and kids and partners and the ritual of the time slayer is normal and ok. No I don't think deep conversations and spontaneous adventures being replaced with a tired coffee every six months is a normal part of growing up. I don't think that emotional intimacy and soul bonds disintegrating in the face of practical inconvenience is a fact of life. I think that means something is deeply deeply wrong with our society and I will never forgive it for the friends I've lost

[squashbananak]

[annikathewitch]

Okay, as much as I love Rocky extending Grace's life without telling him, consider: Rocky *does* tell Grace, Grace just then somehow manages to like. Horrendously misinterpret what the treatment is actually for. Like.

Eridian Doctor: We went through the human genome and found a bunch of places with old broken DNA repair mechanisms so we came up with a gene editing therapy that fixes them in order to extend your lifespan.

Grace: *flashbacks to when Rocky found out that humans can experience long term effects from lower doses of radiation exposure and Grace wasn't being as careful as he should have been back when they first met because he still thought this was gonna be a suicide mission*

Grace (internally): Oh, so cancer prevention! Got it!

Grace: Sounds good!

*like 100 years later*

Grace: Hey Rocky, how am I not dead yet?

Rocky: ???

[pig-lota]

Eridian doctor: this treatment will increase your bone density to prevent them breaking

Grace internally: Oh right, low gravity can cause bone degradation. Makes sense that after so long in space it'd be good

Grace: sounds good to me!

One modification to the LPR5 gene later

Grace falls off a cliff

Grace: Hey why didn't I break any bones???

Rocky: ??? We made your bones strong statement

They add more salt or something to the water in his enclosure so that he can still swim comfortably despite the increased density.

[lifeafterpsychiatry]

The solution to ableism isn't for me to "stop calling myself disabled", it's for everyone to stop treating "disabled" as a bad word

[what-even-is-thiss]

A lot of my vegetarian friends don’t get why I still eat meat even though I mostly eat vegetarian with just occasional meat when left to my own devices and at the end of the day it’s because I just don’t have the same moral issues involved with killing animals that they do.

Yes I love animals. I don’t love them because they’re cute and I feel bad for killing them though. I love them as part of the broader ecosystem. I respect them. Probably more than they respect me, because at the end of the day I know that a chicken wouldn’t hesitate to eat me if it had the means and I don’t see why I shouldn’t strike first.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I’m just not ashamed of being an omnivore. Yes this chicken was once an individual. Thank you chicken for your sacrifice. You were delicious and gave me some very necessary B vitamins.

[what-even-is-thiss]

A lot of the vegetarians that I know are vegetarian in a “feel bad if they step on a cockroach” kind of way.

The difference between me and them is that I recognize myself as an animal defending its territory. Cockroaches spread disease into your food storage. Therefore, they are a home security threat and I shall act as a proper ape should when faced with this kind of threat and stomp on it without remorse.

Many people see differently to me about these things. I know because I am friends with some of them. And yet I am called upon when necessary so the cockroach blood may not be on their hands but instead is on mine.

Being the designated bug stomper and snake catcher in most groups you’re in can kind of give you a perspective sometimes on your existance as an animal. What am I but an ape throwing a snake out of my tree? An ape that has the ability to make chicken nuggets.

[amygdalae]

kind of hate my stupid caustic pussy for dissolving my underwear over time but it's kind of cool, like, scientifically

[destinationtoast]

dying at this sequence from @pinkydragon01 :

[halfbloodfanboy]

[hotvampireadjacent]