I am not; we are knot

DID system (professionally diagnosed). body is an adult. everythin is cool to rb unless we say otherwise :)

[tlirsgender]

My gender is that I'm a boy but I'm also not a boy while still not not being a boy. I have the range, darling

[savameh]

Me but w being a girl but also not a girl

[lyricallylawliet]

Me: Oh, I haven’t replied to my friend in a few days, I sh-

Brain: Don’t bother :) They already hate you :) You waited too long :)

Me: …

Brain: Also, all your other friends hate you, too :)

[letmo-gerringuppercataracts]

Guess what? I did it!!!!

i completely isolated myself from everyone who once cared about me and now there’s no purpose in me being alive

[wingedbeings]

me, feeling bad: uh oh looks like it's time to isolate babey!! *proceeds to only feel significantly worse*

[weareknot]

I'm fucking miserable and I don't know what to do about it anymore. I've been avoiding every form of support or social contact because what if everyone ignores me, or is horrible, or what if they're all nice to me. I have no idea how to deal with people being nice to me.

uuggghhhhhhhhhhh

[kittens-jpg]

the best moodboard ever

[fotobilog]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[cybergata]

Sandra Dee Lutheran

[wellthatwasdumb]

[mermaids-luv]

[funnelcloudd]

GREAT octopus TEN OUT OF TEN shiny

[lioness-alana]

This is a first edition holographic octopus. This is worth a lot of money.

[enby-life]

A short thing about “weird triggers” inspired by this that I’ll end up deleting later honestly-

You can reblog this but like... don’t fuck around??? I won’t hesitate with the block button on this I swear to fuck I won’t.

[enby-life]

Well this doubled in notes in like three hours so... I’m glad other people are finding this validating

[butch-with-a-tortoise-deactivat]

Hearing fractions of multi digit numbers for me (for example: 170 over fifty) is a huge trigger for me when I hear them spoken aloud

To the point I have noticeable physical reactions

[lilcowgirl7-deactivated20210223]

[oysters-aint-for-me]

has anyone ever had the problem where you literally never want to do anything that you cannot reap benefits from immediately

like maybe I’m hungry but everything I have in the house at the moment would take 10+ minutes to prepare so I just……put off making the food for WAY longer than it would have taken to prepare the food when I first got hungry

Or i want to order some necessary thing online but the website says it will take a week to get here and i’m like “oh well fuck that” so I put off ordering it for like a week

Or if im like “I should clean my room because I like when it’s clean” but I know it’ll take me a couple hours so I don’t do it for like six months

It’s like there are only two times for me: right this instant and The Entire Rest Of The Future.

[strawberryoverlord]

That’s executive disfunction baby

[weareknot]

You know what, I'm fucking sick of this. I can't talk to anyone, inside or outside my head. Obviously those are two separate problems but still I'm just so fucking done.

Denial is sky high again because our internal communication is zero and we're not switching much (probably because we're constantly hiding from housemates who don't believe us).

And outside? Talking to people?? No, everyone is laughing about me and talking about me behind my back. Every time I go to speak to anyone I'm reminded that they don't want me here, I shouldn't be talking to them and wasting their time.

[programmerhumour]

You are mistaken

[shirkers2018dirsanditan]

scientific institutions aren’t “corrupted” by racism or sexism, they developed specifically in the context of white and male supremacy. modern medicine developed, in part, to provide a biological basis for oppression and to pathologize the vast majority of the world’s population, all women and all “nonwhite” people. not only that, but many of the major developments in medicine have directly been at the expense of marginalized people. oppressive regimes also often rely on scientific institutions to further subjugate the population.

[shirkers2018dirsanditan]

some sources to further read if anyone’s interested!

medicine and imperialism:

colonizing the body, chapter 5, david arnold

curing their ills, chapter 5, meghan vaughan

toward an anthropology of immunology: the body as a nation-state, emily martin

ethical variability: drug development and globalizing clinical trials, adriana petryna

science and authoritarianism/imperialism:

japanese doctors’ experimentation in wartime china, jing bao nie

administering colonial science: nutrition research and human biomedical experimentation in aboriginal communities and residential schools, 1942-1952

the humanitarian impact and implications of nuclear test explosions in the pacific region

medicine, misogyny, and racism:

interrogating bodies: medico-racial knowledge, politics, and the study of a disease, melbourne tapper

the woman in the body, chapter 7: premenstrual syndrome, work discipline, and anger, emily martin

the growth of medical authority: technology and morals in turn-of-the-century obstetrics, judith walzer leavitt

“scenes of an indelicate character”: the medical “treatment” of victorian women, mary poovey

[butchgender-remade-deactivated2]

current gender: saying I'm a woman is weird and saying I'm not a woman is also weird