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lifeafterhappilyeverafter

And no one knows how far it goes.

folklorespring

Amazing

dailyhollanov

HEATED RIVALRY ⏤ 1x02 -> 1x05

fromhersoul

ivviannaa

shane comes to dinner with hayden and jackie alone, explaining that ilya had to go to a meeting with wiebe or fulfill some other captain duty, and makes a joke about how hayden must be happy that things are 'back how they used to be.' and obviously hayden laughs along and agrees, but internally he's horrified because his immediate reaction was disappointment. he misses ilya. he doesn't know when the hell he began to count on ilya's presence, but he clearly was now

cue later that night with hayden nearly in tears being like "we're friends, jackie. i am FRIENDS with ILYA ROZANOV. this is awful" and she thinks it's the funniest thing ever

jakeperalta

25 years of gilmore girls event - day four: season 4 / favourite setting/location / cinematography + @giftober 2025 | day 2: "cities/towns"

↳ stars hollow town square

incidentalcomics

Spotted the inspiration for this comic at The Art Institute of Chicago.

Fisherman’s Cottage, by Harold Sohlberg, 1906

tanyushenka

Hassan II Mosque @ esalaskari

lavenderprose

The thing about Shane is that the WOULD NOT kill himself. Ilya always kinda has it in the back of his mind. He's been passively suicidal since he was a preteen and, forgive me for saying so, pretty actively suicidal at several points as well. Ilya Rozanov does not expect or really even WANT to make it to thirty. Ilya lives his life under the assumption that he will someday wrap his car around a tree or catch a skate wrong and bleed out on national television or maybe, honestly, just go missing. Take himself out somewhere like a sick dog and nobody will care enough to find him (they will) or at the very least the tragedy of his early demise will be overshadowed by the relief felt when everyone realizes that They Don't Have To Deal With Him Anymore (He is wrong)

So that's the tragedy of Ilya Rozanov. The tragedy of Shane Hollander is that he will give completely up and then just keep going. Failure is not an option and he needs to keep performing at the highest level possible for as long as possible but everything else will be gone. Any sort of light or warmth extinguished. Deprivation will become its own reward. He will become so scared of his own wants that he starts actively avoiding things that bring him even some modicum of pleasure--and yes, this would be self harm. He starts to associate the pain of longing with success. Family is his only reprieve, and even then he rations it out. He holds all of his ache and his longing and his need in a fist in his chest and sometimes when his mom hugs him too tight or his dad rubs his shoulders it starts to dislodge and that's dangerous. He can't let himself have that.

Shane would not be Scott Hunter, hooking up with men in Europe on the down-low every summer just to fill that gaping maw of absent affection and connection in some small way. He would not be Ilya Rozanov, making bad decision after bad decision and waiting for one of them to catch up with him in a way that finally shoves him off the coil, one way or another. He would ignore and deprive the soft animal of his body until it became something dark and cold and barren and he would feel accomplished when it finally stopped whimpering and just laid down to die. And then he would keep going.