"What's this?" "That's a mango."

Erin. 20. Canada. If you want to talk to me, just send me an ask or something! If I follow you and you're a studyblr, my studyblr is eng-aspirations.

[mckitterick]

this feels relevant

[mckitterick]

art from Outbreak, by Bryn Barnard

[mckitterick]

found this new term over at Urban Dictionary

[princessesfanarts]

Mulan Jacket by Flasho-D

[princessesfanarts]

Mulan Jacket by Flasho-D

[catchymemes]

[link-the-feral-anon]

When you remember the anti-vax movement

[burger-prince]

[podcastwizard]

i used to be really focused on “the first song i heard of the year, the first movie i watched of the year, the first book, blah blah blah” but then i realized none of that matters and i’m watching princess diaries 2: royal engagement and you know what? starting the decade off right

[podcastwizard]

my favorite character is the background princess with the thick southern accent. what combination of family background results in someone being both invited to a royal birthday party and sounding like you climbed right out of a georgia peach farm. i love her.

[podcastwizard]

nevermind the best characters are brigitte and brigitta the maids who seem to want nothing more than to please the bourgeoisie class in which they are in servitude to and do so with a placating smile on their faces who thought these characters were a good idea

[podcastwizard]

the old man who slept through the whole parliament meeting and then decided at the end they would maintain an old misogynistic law for the sake of tradition is a republican

[podcastwizard]

NEVERMIND THE BEST CHARACTER IS LIONEL THE SECURITY INTERN

[podcastwizard]

nevermind the best character is the scottish reporter who never shuts up

[podcastwizard]

NEVERMIND the best character is johnny blue the asian singer

[podcastwizard]

NEVERMIND IT’S KIP KELLY CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD

[podcastwizard]

the theme of 2020 is “paige cries at the scene in princess diaries 2 where mia gives all the orphans tiaras and has them walk in the parade to the tune of kelly clarkson”

[podcastwizard]

NEVERMIND THE BEST CHARACTER IS STAN LEE AS THE MAN WHO ONLY LEARNED ENGLISH THROUGH THREE STOOGES MOVIES

[gerriceo]

Me at family gatherings.

[momunofu-deactivated20150808]

chillin on a Saturday night

[thepope]

Calm down jojo

[momunofu-deactivated20150808]

you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I should try to relax

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

You call that “chillin”?

Everyone knows the best way to relax is with a good book and a warm drink

[totallyfubar]

I dunno, man,

 sometimes I like just relaxing on my laptop

[witchchad-deactivated20160310]

get on my level boys

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

Unfortunately to “get on your level” I’d need a boat trip to the Mariana Trench and a pair of cinderblock shoes.

[nerdgul]

Thats gotta be the sickest burn ive ever read holy fuck

[tyrannosarcophagous]

this post appears once every million years

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

I kept hoping someone else would one up me and I’d have to escalate even further but nobody has.

[robot-hands-mccoolguy]

I don’t think it’s possible to one up you

[theboywhoreadsbooks]

Me, looking back at how many books i used to read: I love that bitch, she was going places.

[fiddlesolo]

vampires really should be able to get drunk they literally have to be alive forever let them have this

[1953swan]

hc: vampires have no blood so they get drunk faster than people

[bellas-orange-jansport-deactiva]

charlie pulling over a shirtless carlisle at 4 am: dr cullen your blood alcohol content is literally 100% how are you not dead carlisle: au contraire im absolutely dead

[maximumsunshine]

I did not expect a decent twilight joke on my dash in 2019, but nevertheless there it is and it’s hilarious.

[princessesfanarts]

By LadyShalirin

[mysharona1987]

[giasesshoumaru]

This is the full question and response in case anyone is curious. It’s awesome.

Dear Care and Feeding,

My wife and I and our 4-year-old son were out to dinner last week. It was a medium-nice restaurant, not fast food, but not super fancy either. My son is a normal, active little boy, and it’s hard for him to sit through a whole dinner, so we let him explore the restaurant a little. I noticed our waitress giving him the hairy eyeball, so we asked him to stop running. He was pretty good about it after that, but he did get underfoot when she was carrying a tray, and she spoke to him pretty sharply to go back to our table and sit down. I felt it was completely uncalled for, and she should have come and spoken to us personally instead of disciplining someone else’s child.

I tipped 5 percent and spoke briefly to her manager, who gave noncommittal replies. My wife agrees with me, but when we posted about it on Facebook, we got a lot of judgy responses.

—It’s Hard for a 4-Year-Old to Sit Still

Dear Sit Still,

Yeah, this is your fault. It’s hugely your fault. Of course it’s hard for a 4-year-old to sit still, which is why people usually stick to fast-dining establishments while working on restaurant manners. It’s why one parent usually responds to a fidgety kid who wants to “explore” by taking him outside the restaurant, where he can get his wiggles out while not taking laps around servers precariously carrying trays of (often extremely hot) food and drink.

A kid “exploring” a restaurant is not a thing. When you did intervene, it wasn’t to get him back in his seat. It was just to instruct him to “stop running.” You weren’t parenting, so a server did it for you. She was right. You were wrong.

Your son is not ready to eat at a “medium-nice” restaurant again until he is capable of behaving a little better. You can practice at home. You can practice at McDonald’s. You can try a real restaurant again with the understanding that one of you may need to take him out when he starts getting the urge to run an obstacle course.

I doubt that you will do this, but I encourage you to return the restaurant, apologize to the manager for complaining about your server, and leave her a proper tip.

Mend your wicked ways.

[lazy-cat-corner]

And that’s the tea!

It’s not complicated.

Your wine glass is on your right

Use the fork farthest from you and work your way in

Watch your damn kids

And tip your fucking waiters! Periodt!!!

[ivsaur]

funniest person alive is that woman who takes edibles before filming herself doing makeup tutorials

[omghotmemes]

Jesus X-man Christ

[tracer-isms]

Holy shit

[shadows-and-starlight]

This is definitely blasphemy. *reblogs*

[myfrogcroaked]

These Pics Are Composed Of As Many Pixels As There Are Animals Still Alive In These Species

A brilliant 2008 campaign by World Wildlife Fund (WWF) has been resurfacing thanks to a recent reddit post going viral. The campaign, called WWF Japan – Population by pixel, was created by the agency Hakuhodo C&D / Tokyo.

[mousathe14]

Oh no…

[aviandakota]

Y'all this is BAD

[lyinginbedmon]

Wow this is a really elegant way of describing why falling populations result in a narrow and incomplete picture of the actual species

[freakxwannaxbe]

There is an old belief in Serbian villages and small towns that certain pumpkins (and watermelons), when left outside during a full moon, will turn in to a vampire.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

☆Patreon ☆ Commission info ☆ Buy me coffee ☆ Twitter ☆ Instagram☆

[lovingempress]

*whisper chants* vampire pumpkin vampire pumpkins vampire pumpkins

[shieldmaiden19]

This is the quality fall shit I’m here for

[severalowls]

I think it’s great that Pumpkins (and other squash) were only introduced to Europe around 1600 and the Serbs wasted absolutely no time blaming them for their problems.

[gyeomdiary-deactivated20210430]

this is so fucking funny

[ratsilk-deactivated20240107]

This is hilarious but I was enthralled by what ever face Simon was making at 13sec

[teaboot]

Nice lady told me the other day ‘yeah I’d love to have a job again, but my husband doesn’t want me to’ and physically cracked teeth holding back on “your husband sounds like an asshole”

[teaboot]

We just met and I’m your cashier so this might sound kind of odd but ma'am if you need your husband curbstomped I can have that arranged

[dalaminaubis]

My Dad didn’t want my Mom to have a job for the longest time because he said it would be embarrassing to him. When he did finally “let” her get a job it was l because it was at a flower shop and that was a frilly enough woman job that it counted as acceptable to him…

[teaboot]

Your dad sounds like an asshole