What's in the Cigarbox?

A blog about how I figure out what I'm even doing with my life.

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Days 10,11,12, &13

Sketch doesn't pertain to anything in real life, it's just a for class doodle. 

It's been an eventful few days. I panicked and ran through some class assignments which turned out perfectly well! Which was the first very pleasant surprise of the year! 

I spent Sunday at the beach, which was a fun adventure and got to see the new Sherlock episodes, which were alright. I've got a lot of work ahead of me but it's a much better start than anticipated. 

It's such a relief to start off easing my feet into the cold water. There's a lot left to dip in, and a lot more to wade through, but easing in is a huge weight off my shoulders. 

My Speech class is insane in a bad way though, but I'm working to fix that issue. Dropping it is the most ideal option, but that's on the fence. Hopefully all goes well on that front. 

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Day 9: There comes a time in every blog's life...

when you realize it's not always going to be useful. So far things haven't hit the fan, so my entries are more of a chore than a stress relieving outlet. Bear that in mind for now. There will come a time not so far from now when this is going to become vital to my well-being. 

It should be noted that it is a good thing it's not vital yet. Until then, enjoy my pointless text posts reminding myself this is not as stupid as it feels.

There will be more of them. 

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Day 8: Pitch

So my pitch went really well. Good enough for me. 

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Day 7: The Spirited Away Soundtrack

I think what I like most about Spirited Away's soundtrack is how heavy it can be one moment and then heart-lifting it is just a moment later. There's an enormous amount of dimension to the music that a lot of soundtracks either lack or don't use properly. Any story can unfold in the song, and it's kind of magical. 

Today was difficult for different reasons. My professor is scatterbrained and it's devilishly hard to pay attention to what she says, and a very bad headache from yesterday was reawakened. But! I was saved by some tea and humor from my friends so all in all it wasn't a bad day. 

Tomorrow will be a challenge. I will be up tonight drawing and writing and generally making tonight harder but tomorrow easier. One step at a time. 

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Day 6: This is not Rivendell.

This isn't even Bree. Hell, it's not even Farmer Maggot's. It's out in the fields getting chased down by wraiths. But this metaphor implies I will go there and back again, so it'll have a good outcome by the end. 

I don't think I can manage a picture tonight, I just don't have it in me. Instead I'm going to get some work done maybe. That's the best remedy I can think of write now. 

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Day 5: Traveling Back to Mordor

On my short travel back to SCAD (henceforth to be known as Mordor) I listened to the most wonderful jams. The Fleet Foxes in particular. They're a indie-folk band and they've got very chill music. It helps to calm the mind in stressful situations; a good choice for starting a journey towards Mount Doom. 

On the whole, getting back and settling down has been easy. We have a cat now, which will be a huge comfort. I brought as little as I could manage which is also a huge load off my mind, since mo' crap, mo' problems. 

Class starts tomorrow and that's stressful, but I'm keeping my spirits up. Let's hope for the best. 

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Day 4: Packing

Packing. Pretty straight forward. Started this morning. Had a nap, back to it again. It'll be nice to have everything squared away. It's tough trying to take only the essentials. It's always like leaving a piece of you behind. 

I've tidied up some ideas to help prepare for class, and I've almost got everything ready to go. The transition will be smooth enough. I think I'll take a break and play my Uke after this, then get back to finishing up the grind. 

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Day 3: Recovering from Unexpected Shock

Made the inadvisable decision to read the syllabus of a class I've been absolutely dreading (oh yeah it's even worse than I'd imagined), and I've been recovering today, getting back into a positive mood about the issue. 

It gave me a chance to confront the problem, always good, and it's occurred to me that I've run out of space in my head for certain baggage. I'm in the process of cleaning it all out, and it's funny, it really feels like I'm just cleaning my room. It helps to think of my brain as a little box I've been storing things in like an attic. It shouldn't be an attic, it should be more like an studio apartment. Just enough space to live in and get work done. 

Out with the old thoughts, grudges, and worries, in with the soft rugs, desk, and hammock. Recycling bin too, can't forget that little treasure. It's good to clean off the desktop every now and again. 

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Day 2: Ukulele practice BEGINS.

So my ukulele arrived a day early and I couldn't be happier. Cheap instruments may not look pretty, and may not last long, but they sure are a lot of fun to play with. 

Got the thing tuned, and I'm strumming away. I only know three chords, but that's the coolest thing I can say about this new year. I can play THREE CHORDS ON AN UKULELE. And there will be more learning. 

Currently learning Singin' In the Rain, but The Last of Us will not be far behind, and Yuna's theme. Let's not kid ourselves here, I will learn ALL the game themes that matter in my life. I'm looking at you, Zelda. 

If anyone has suggestions for songs, or plays ukulele and wants to be supportive, I'd love all of your comments and suggestions. Please?

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Day 1: A list of things that make me happy.

At first I wrote all the things down and started to explain why I like them, but 1) it's taking way too long, and 2) I think I'll save that for days when I need a real pick-me-up.

Books:

The Cirque Du Freak

Howl's Moving Castle

The Abhorsen Series

The Magicians

Brave, The Artbook

Harry Potter

The Graveyard Book

Movies:

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Mary Poppins

Real Steel

The Neverending Story

Jurassic Park

The Prince of Egypt

Princess Bride

Music:

Spirited Away Soundtrack

Classic Christmas Music

Coldplay

Fleet Foxes

The Legend of Zelda Soundtracks

Final Fantasy and Kingdom Hearts Soundtracks

Activities:

Cycling

Hiking

Drawing

Writing

Swinging

Dancing

Reading

Listening to people's life stories/ things they're passionate about

Right now, this list is a little slim. I'll be adding to it as I think of things, but I think this is a good start. Whenever I have nothing to write about, I'll come back to this list and figure out what about them makes me happy. 

[whatsinthecigarbox]

New Year Resolutions

Let's make this official.

Learn to play the Ukulele. I bought one yesterday, and I'm excited. It's one of my two favourite instruments, and I've always wanted to learn. Learn to be optimistic. It doesn't take knowing me more than five minutes to catch how pessimistic I am. I think I originally did it for the humor, but it's like a bad paint job now and I need to scrape it off. Find more meaning in my work. It's one think I supremely lack, and one of the biggest contributes to my lack of direction. Be brave, and talk to people. I'm the worst conversationalist. I'm terrified to talk to people, though I think I hide that fairly well for how much trouble it actually is. Listen more. Something I used to be good at, but it's seems like the urge to want to be heard is proportional to age with a lot of people I know, including myself (there are so many wonderful exceptions to that rule though). Let's keep it simple this year. Happy New Year.

[whatsinthecigarbox]

Before I even get started.

As I'm writing this, it's New Years Eve. Very early on New Year's Eve. Time for resolutions, right?

Yesterday morning, I got to thinking about mine, and I got stuck on how my life isn't going in a direction I'm remotely comfortable with. And, worse than that, I've known this for a whole year now. 

It's on my mind all the time. I chose the wrong major. I'm not happy drawing, but I love drawing. The stress has been flaying me alive. I see my classmates struggling along beside me, and shouldn't that be comforting? 

Something isn't right here so I've decided, it's time to make some changes and set my priorities straight. 

I intend to write a new post everyday about something that is going to help make a difference in my life. If I can keep it up, we'll see what I can make out of myself.