I wish I was anywhere else

Lucy, 23 and fabulous ;)

[aromanticduck]

Saw someone typo 'queerbaiting' as 'queenbaiting'. Is that when you think you hear Under Pressure but it turns out to be Ice Ice Baby?

[hundredsofsmallbirds]

the beach boys were right. it would be nice. [tearing up] it really would be fucking nice

[adonischildsupportcase]

[pretty-pink-seaslug]

[thyrell]

[optimisticbananaharmony-deactiv]

water

meat

vegetables

salt

this is soup.

[thyrell]

its too cold

[oh-my-god-someone-actually]

Gazpacho

[thyrell]

no tomatos in it

[aflo]

there's at least one tomato in it

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

can't stop laughing at this. he looks so defeated

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

normalizing divorce isn't enough. we have to start throwing divorce parties like weddings

[forbiddenxxfruitxx-deactivated2]

[theworsethingsgettheharderifight]

[kiwi]

[kiwi]

he figured it out btw he just prefers biting

[catchymemes]

[kalichnikov]

I can't donate my body to science what if it goes to a medical school and when the students crack open my torso and the professor says "I'm sorry these are the stupidest organs I've ever seen"

[tuxedodan]

anyone else here like men and also doomed by the narrative

[daenerys-targaryen]

let’s talk about the early stages of hyperfixation where you can literally feel your brain getting doses of serotonin because of a show or a movie or a person or a character and mentally you’re like ‘ooooh no’ but it’s like a blackhole you can’t run or escape from so you just gotta ride it out knowing full well the next few months are going to be spent mindlessly obsessing over this thing

[writing-prompt-s]

After bitting a Fae, the Vampire claims that she must serve him, for his bite converted her into his thrall. The Fae claims that the Vampire must serve her, for the vampire ate fae food without her permission. As none of them is willing to give up, they bring the case to you, a lawyer.

[theladyregret]

“Congratulations!”

“What?” They both ask, confused.

“On your new marriage!”

[funnytwittertweets]

[mypoorcanary]

saying "im gonna kill myself" whenever anything goes wrong is literally my number 1 coping mechanism. im not gonna do it im just saying it bc it makes me feel good

[catasters]

[butternaan]

what are u romanticizing today u little homo