We're A Team @wildeiswild - Tumblr Blog

felderwin

My favorite thing to do when someone asks me to perform a simple task is to say “No” while doing it

sexycraisinthanos

Someone: Hey, can I borrow a pen?

Me, getting a bag of pens out: Absolutely not, perish.

#i do this all the time i cant stop #to the point where my boyfriend just says 'thanks' when i say no

thewitcherincorrectquotes

Jaskier: What would you do if I was kidnapped?

Geralt: Nothing. I’d just wait for thirty minutes until they let you go voluntarily.

catsi

Okay so I was at work and I had the hiccups and I was stocking an aisle and this lady in the aisle heard me hiccuping and said "oh have you got the hiccups?" and I said yeah and she said "...Do you want me to get rid of them?" and I thought she meant she was going to scare me so I was like "n-no thanks" and she was like "you want to keep your hiccups??" and I said "yeah please dont scare me" and then I wandered off

And then a couple minutes later I still had hiccups and she walked by on her way out and she said "I wasn't going to scare you you know" and I said "you weren't?" and she said "no -- I have a way I can cure hiccups" and I was like "well what is it?" she's like "theres something about me that when I talk to people their hiccups just go away. i just chat or maybe tell them a story and after a minute or so their hiccups are just gone" and I thought she was like definitely on some pseudoscience shit so i kind of laughed and joked like "you should expect a call from the X-Men soon then" and she said "no. For real. I bet your hiccups are gone now aren't they?" and sure enough my fucking hiccups were gone. They stopped while she was speaking to me and didn't come back all night

what the fuck kind of power did this woman have... was she a hiccup witch??? I have so many questions for her

phoenixtawnyflower

I think my favorite jokes are the ones that weren’t even all that funny until I was an adult, and now they’re fucking hilarious. I’m not even talking about the dirty jokes. I’m talking about in Finding Nemo where the sharks are having fucking AA for fish eating. Remember that shit? “I am a nice shark, not a mindless eating machine. If I am to change this image, I must first change myself.” Who ever thought of that? That was brilliant. Or what about that time in Shrek 2 where Shrek and Donkey infiltrate the castle pretending to be union workers? Little me didn’t give a shit about unions but big me is remembering Shrek going “It’s okay buddy, we’re from the union” and the desk worker secretively “we don’t even have dental,” and Shrek just shakes his head and looks at Donkey like he can’t believe this shit and goes, “They don’t even have dental.” What the fuck. I’m dying of laughter. Who comes up with this shit.

rxbytuesday

“And why should gay people like me support the miners?”

“Because miners dig for coal, which produces power, which allows gay people like you to dance to Bananarama ‘till 3 o'clock in the morning.”

Pride (2014)

lovemeorlovemycloset

open and raw communication with your partner may be uncomfortable and feel so ugly and vulnerable but it solves soo many problems in the end

hellfresh

The idea that was sold to us of "love is effortless and you should communicate telepathically with your partner" is false. Love is awkward as hell. It's A LOT of straight up talking and realization of your self - your own needs. It's important to make those needs heard. Do not deny yourself full love

facts-i-just-made-up

Helpfull Writing Tips

Want to improve you writing style? Check out these easy tips!

Very you’re sentence structure. Add periods randomly and extend other sentences unnaturally to make them longer, more repetitious, and longer.

EXAMPLE: Bob went. To the market to buy some dogs.

Use descriptive word. Sentences are boring without some good, strong, interesting, useful, descriptive description.

EXAMPLE: Don’t just say “She looked with her eyes,” say, “She looked with her round, spherical, moist eyes.”

Use obejctive tone. This means using a voice in narration that objectifies you’re characters. When you characters are more like objects it’s easier to write them because you don’t need to give them human stuff like emotions and motives. They can just act to fit the plot.

EXAMPLE: Carla went to her morning class at school and when the aliens attacked she joined them in fighting Earth.

MAke up words when you don’t know the right one. This will not only ornaclate your readers, but they will also think your smarter because you know words that they don’t.

EXAMPLE: Richard felt he had to obfuscate the truth.

Use “passive” voice. This means when you get to a word that could be an action verb, instead “pass” the word over and use a better word, like “nestle” or “sponge.” These are good words. They are mine but I will let you use them.

EXAMPLE: There was a plot to sponge the king, but it was nestled by the knights.

Now you know writing. Go froth and write using these laws and you will write a good every time.

snowytumble

Just…don’t call her eyes *moist*. For me. ok?

facts-i-just-made-up

Correction as per your request:

EXAMPLE: Don’t just say “She looked with her eyes,” say, “She looked with her round, spherical, generously lubricated eyes.”

radi0-open-door

gettheheckityheckouttahere

Jonathan: *trying to develop his photos*

Nancy:

fr33tobm3-deactivated20160118

The continually inspiring magic of HRT. Live your truth!

flamingofairy-blog

This makes me so fucking happy

lorileadfoot-deactivated2020072

Bless em!! Major support for brave trans sisters.

adrift-inthe-reverie-deactivate

THEYRE ALL SO BEAUTIFUL!!!

jamesscarstairs

peeta mellark really was that bitch, pulling that “if it weren’t for the baby” line out of nowhere, oh he knew

earlsgrey

if peeta mellark was in the game of thrones universe, he would have won the throne in 2 seasons max

fairweathermyth

I grew up in Northern Ireland. I know all about what happens when people don’t talk to each other. That’s why I’ve never understood - what’s the point of supporting gay rights, but nobody else’s rights you know? Or workers rights, but not women’s rights. It’s, I don’t know, illogical.

Pride (2014)

feministism

biglawbear

OH IT MAKES SENSE NOW THANK YOU FOR PUTTING IT INTO WORDS

thehighpriestofreverseracism

weeeewwww

coolhiroaki

sick of “scottish independence” this and “irish reunification” that

theres 3 of us and 1 of england

i say we just kick the english out the uk

systlin

Ireland, Scotland, and Wales kick England out and join the UK as the United Celtic Nations.

sentientdustbunny

I have nothing to do with UK or European or anything politics, but I like this plan nonetheless

geekandmisandry

Why stop there? Let’s kick them out of the whole Commonwealth too. We will keep having our athletic meet ups without the English.

letsplaysocialjustice

can Cornwall join

pajamaslam-deactivated20190101

the switch from ‘a girl worth fighting for’ to coming upon the decimated village in mulan is THE MOST kick-in-the-teeth mood change IN ALL OF CINEMA

furikomaru-deactivated20190920

That scene shift did more for our generation’s understanding of the horror of war in ten seconds than Game of Thrones did in eight seasons, and it did it without showing us a single dead body.

naturallytom

hi can we normalize the idea of choosing not to drink

cherryclit

no cuz thats fucking lame

fairy25

hey it actually isn’t! i get really really sick whenever i have more than a beer or two and i absolutely hate how people assume i must be lame/a kill joy when i refuse a drink. people choose to be sober or mostly sober for a variety of reasons, e.g. addiction, medical, etc. and not a single one of them is “because i’m a lame person who hates fun”

love-god-herself-deactivated202

The degree to which drinking is seen as a must in social situations is fucking weird, and I think the fact that people are more put off by non-drinkers than by how much alcohol consumption has permeated the culture is … troubling.