Been gaining slightly more followers lately so I figured I'd make a pinned post
I mostly reblog other stuff with limited commentary, usually whatever I find interesting, but occasionally I make art or get chatty, the tags for those are below.
Call me Pearl, name unrelated to the beautiful talented PearlescentMoon. I go by several nicknames online and continue to do so, so if you see me use something else, that's why.
I am an adult and I often engage with rpf stuff, sometimes with adult themes. I do not want children around here. Curate your own space accordingly.
the clip of etho being like oh OR he's hanging out with ME late at night is crazy-crazy bc i think abt the older stream clip where he's surprised other people think bdubs will log on if etho asks, even if it's late at night for him. he realized his evil powers which he demonstrably did not seem to know three years ago.
most imaginative treebarpf soldier: martyn watches old clips of ren singing on stream and then ren streams himself singing a song about a lost love woww
rendog: making up songs for literally anything on false’s birthday and inserting her into a song and conveniently describes her as “shimmering” and “such a lovely face” and “i was thinking to myself this could be heaven or this could be hell” and quickly adding “it’s hell” completely unprompted
#‘does he know he can be bi’ he doesn’t even know he can be straight with false I fear#said this before but he’s doing suppressed homosexual yearning but he. maybe there’s just something really peculiarly wrong with him. god
Obsessed with the "bdubs is actually straight" idea its so funny. Like everyone is busy congratulating Etho on transitioning and becoming comfortable with herself and someone makes a joke about how at least bdubs is bisexual you don't have to worry about him! or something. meanwhile Bdubs is in the corner sweating bullets desperately trying to figure out what to do with his bisexual pride pins. Etho gives him a medal for queerbaiting
“Are you really getting rid of this stuff?” Etho asks, resting her chin on his shoulder to peer down into the bundle. “You’ve had it for so long.”
“Now that I’m officially straight,” Bdubs says, bravely holding back tears, “I don’t deserve it.”
It’s not that Bdubs isn’t happy about Etho’s transition—he couldn’t be happier, frankly, to see her so happy—but it does put him in somewhat of an awkward position. The small collection of pink-purple-blue pins and buttons and flags (okay, only one flag) he’s accumulated over the last decade fits easily inside of one small bundle. He’s just not sure what the heck to do with it.
“Uh-huh. Maybe it should go to someone who hasn’t been queerbaiting me for the last ten years. It’s a shame, actually,” Etho says, and wraps her arms around his waist, breathing a laugh against his neck. “I don’t get to call you a sissy anymore.”
Bdubs decides that afternoon to swing by Ren’s. There’s a few bi people on the server, but he’s fairly sure Cleo and Gem both have their own collections of flagged-up merch, and after them, Ren’s the person he’d trust to take care of this stuff the most. Maybe it doesn’t suit him given his new circumstances (not that anything else would; Bdubs shudders at the thought of wearing anything with that heinous black-and-white straight pride flag), but it does still have sentimental value. Ren’ll look after it, he’s sure.
When he makes it over to the Archives of the Arcane, he finds Ren poring over a levitating tome, a big circle of magic nonsense floating in the air around him. It dissipates the second Bdubs shouts out, “hi Ren!”
“Sir Bdubs,” Ren says, looking up from his book. “What can I do you for?”
Bdubs pulls the bundle out of his inventory and empties its contents over the table nearest to Ren’s flying book. “I have an amazing, one-of-a-kind offer for you. A load of pride stuff. Vintage pins from—from 2015.” Bdubs snorts at his own joke. “You want ‘em?”
Ren picks up a pin and inspects it through his glasses. Then his eyes go wide and he drops it. “Is that the, erm, bisexual flag?” he asks, voice a little high and strained like he’s trying to be casual.
Bdubs nods, and sighs mournfully. “Yeah. My old standard.”
“What makes you think I’m—that?”
Bdubs rolls his eyes. “Are you kidding me? You and Martyn were fa—oh, I can’t say that any more. You and Martyn were doing something back in Third Life. And I’ve heard those Creepr notifications on your comm.”
Reddening, Ren’s hand flies to the communicator burning a hole in his robe pocket, like Bdubs can see the app through the fabric. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Ren stammers. “And if I did have an app like that, I definitely wouldn’t have notifications.”
“Okay!” Bdubs says, holding up his hands. “Look, you want this stuff or not?”
“Erm.” Ren reaches out for it, then stops himself. “Why are you giving it away, anyway?”
“It’s a whole thing,” Bdubs says, and sighs. “Since Etho came out, I figured she was the only guy I ever liked. So now she’s a woman, I guess I’m not bi anymore. Which sucks! ‘Cause I got all this stuff. So I want it to go to a good home. You know I got my first pride pin almost a decade ago, and—”
“Hold the phone,” Ren says, frowning. “You and Etho are… dating?”
Bdubs blinks at him. And blinks again. “What kind of question is that? We’ve been together since, I don’t know—ten years, Ren.”
“Oh,” Ren says, frown deepening. Then, “I thought we weren’t meant to date other hermits.”
“Where’d you get that idea?” Bdubs says. “You really didn’t know? I know we keep it low-key, but—”
Ren cuts him off again. “So you’re straight, now. You can be straight.”
“...Yes?” Bdubs puts his hands on his hips. “Look, do you want this stuff or not?”
“My deepest apologies, Sir Bdubs, something’s just occurred to me,” Ren says, pulling his robes tightly around him and heading for the exit. “A matter of utmost importance that I need to discuss with Lady FalseSymmetry.”
Crap. “No, no, that’s not what I meant,” Bdubs says, trying to get between Ren and the door but getting buffeted by Ren’s big hat for his trouble. “First me, now you? No way, man! I can’t be de-bisexual-ising two people in one day.”
Ren slips past him easily and, grabbing the brim of his hat with both hands to pull it down and squeeze through the opening, darts through the door. “Hold that thought, Sir Bdubs. I’ll be right back!”
Bdubs is left standing in the middle of the library with the bundle still in his hands, mouth gaping.
That’s it. I hate myself, he thinks. I’ve gotta be the worst ally of all time.
Noel: Matt, Matt, Matt, can you come up with a new word for people who are mostly straight but a little gay, or mostly gay but a little straight?
Q: Oasis.
ethubs meeting up at the edge of some group event where etho is there to talk to bduds without anyone else knowing and bdubs is riding on the high of social interaction with the other hermits having gone well. meanwhile etho is awkward and shy and hides his smile behind his hand when he laughs and doesn't meet bdubs' eyes when bdubs teases him and keeps fidgeting with the hem of his jacket that seems slightly stiff on his shoulders.
and then he shifts and seems to straighten up a bit and bdubs knows something is coming now but it's just etho making some tease about bdubs' latest build and something in bdubs crumbles because he was expecting some tease about them being together in person, maybe something hinting about getting out of the noisy cafe they're in to a more private location, with how etho seemed to have to put effort into even saying it out loud. but something also crumbles at how much effort etho is making for him and how he seems to tough out this uncomfortable situation just for bdubs and he came all this way just for bdubs, he doesn't even want to meet the other hermits, and he does smile when bdubs laughs and bdubs never thought he'd get to see that in his life. and it almost crumbles his restraint, almost makes him reach out and put a hand on etho's knee to reassure him, almost makes him lean forward and lift etho's chin so etho looks at him instead of the floor. everything in bdubs burns to use this once in a lifetime opportunity, to touch etho now that he's within touching distance, to kiss him until his shoulders relax and he understands how much bdubs loves him
for coming here
for the 15-odd years they've been talking
for everything they share
for the way he looks at him above the hand that hides his smile when bdubs teases him in their usual way and there's that spark in his eyes.
he wants to drag him into the bathroom and get a hand down his pants and make him feel good, wants to hear him whine in person instead of filtered through headphones and make him rut against his hand and have his tall body lean against bdubs, have his head fall onto bdubs shoulder as he tenses under bdubs' hand when he finds the right way to touch him, figures out yet another detail about him, coaxes the information of what he likes out of him without ever asking directly, without spooking him by being too forward.
he wants to feel him stiffen as bdubs brings him to completion way too quickly not to mean anything and wants to press a kiss to his blushing forehead before they separate and wants to laugh together when bdubs washes his hands and etho attempts to clean up the mess in his pants with stupid scratchy paper hand towels. he wants to put a hand on the small of etho's back that isn't small at all as they leave the bathroom together and wants to walk him to the hotel and learn more about him, learn everything etho lets him, take what he can before etho disappears again, before his face and his body and his touch is once again hidden from bdubs behind layers of screens and friendly ribbing and they never mention it