doctor who is so hilarious cuz its like yes we are a sci-fi show exploring dark themes of morality and obsession and the implications of present-day capitalism and yes our lead artists are Spice Girls and Britney Spears hope this helps <3
i feel very stongly that elizabeth 100% would have sworn darcy to eternal secrecy about the fact that he had already proposed once unsuccessfully when she accepted, solely bc you just KNOW mr collins' smug ass would be like, "oh ho ho! huh! so apparently it IS the usual with young ladies to reject the addresses of the man whom they secretly mean to accept when he applies for their favor! hm! interesting!" and then she would be honor-bound to leap over lady catherine's dining table and strangle him
I think the best way I can explain how I feel about doctor who is that it’s an ecosystem, like I might not like ticks or mosquitoes and might complain about them, but they’re still there and still part of the ecosystem and that’s fine, I’m just gonna avoid them when possible, and sure I don’t know much about plants but some people do and they can talk about them as much as they want, but I’m not gonna go out of my way to do so, instead I’ll be over here spending most of my time observing the mammals, because that’s my favorite part of the ecosystem
Jane Austen: Darcy, you see an older jolly-looking fellow coming in your direction-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: another one? Miss Bingley, please dance with me-again.
Caroline Bingley: *fake-swooning* oooh, Mr Darcy~again? what would the other guests say?
Charles Bingley: *heh* probably that he is kind of a prick? Or that you guys are an item.
Fitzwilliam Darcy: I have danced with Mrs Hurst too-I am still not romancing anyone.
Caroline Bingley: *sing-song voice* we will see about that!
Jane Austen: the poor guy remains in the middle of the room awkwardly, and then walks away; the older ladies that have introduced themselves as Mrs Bennet and Lady Lucas look at the scene and start whispering furiously-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *rolling his eyes* I can only imagine what they are saying.
Charles Bingley: hey, can I guess what is the general opinion of us at this ball?
Jane Austen: sure, roll a Perception Check.
Charles Bingley: hah, I rolled a twelve!
Jane Austen: you are the man of the hour, and the ladies are very jealous that Miss Bennet has captivated your attention for so much time-
Charles Bingley: what can I say, she is a delight! Who could resist?
Jane Austen: you also feel that Caroline is very much admired for her elegance and style, as is Mrs Louisa Hurst-
Caroline Bingley: *fake hair toss* is anyone surprised?
Jane Austen: you see people looking in the direction of Mr Hurst at the buffet with a general air of ‘eh, he looks like a rich gentleman, I guess he is all right”.
Mr Hurst: hey, I am a gentleman and I am married-I won at this game already, let me eat the imaginary Regency fancy food.
Jane Austen: as for Darcy-you are the rudest, most entitled gentleman they have ever met. You barely spoke and only danced only with the ladies in your party-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: so they hate me because I did not care for making introductions? I do not want to dance with someone else.
Caroline Bingley: *waggling her eyebrows* do you?
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *exaggerated disgust* someone else I don’t know.
Caroline Bingley: la-aame. Okay, we are stopping dancing.
Charles Bingley: I mean, you could dance with someone else, it would not kill you-I come near them and say to Darcy, but in, you know, flowery language pertinent to the time period.
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *smiling* you sure do. But, I say, “I certainly shall not. You know how I detest it, unless I am particularly acquainted with my partner. At such an assembly as this it would be insupportable. Your sisters are engaged, and there is not another woman in the room whom it would not be a punishment to me to stand up with.”
Charles Bingley: *stage whisper* show-off.
Charles Bingley: DM, is there any cute lady I could introduce to Darcy?
Jane Austen: near you there are several young ladies seated, just waiting for a partner-you recognise one of them, a cheerful-looking girl that has been introduced to you as one of the beauties of Longbourn.
Charles Bingley: oh, Jane’s sister, Elizabeth! Darcy! My buddy, my man, look at her! What of it?
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *pfeh* what of it indeed-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: I look at her, I make eye contact just enough to make her realise I have noticed her, and I say to Bingley, “She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me”. Then, I walk away.
Caroline Bingley: *silently mouths “tolerable”*
Charles Bingley: *sighs* Heavens.
Mr Hurst: I was standing over my dessert and did not hear that, but I let go an “ooof” anyway. I felt it.
Caroline Bingley: how is Eliza doing?
Charles Bingley: Elizabeth-
Caroline Bingley: I like Eliza better.
Jane Austen: Elizabeth looks a little longer in your direction, then she stands up and goes to her friends on the other side of the room-she is smiling, but the smile is not reaching her eyes.
Caroline Bingley: *eagerly* tell me this action will have consequences, please tell me it will-
Mr. Collins would be such a fan of ai. He would love it. He would have it write scripts for him to use for complimenting people. He'd ask it what to do in social situations and then when someone would tell him "I think that's a bad idea" he'd be like "my dear madam it's so good of you to be concerned but I think the highly esteemed Grok knows a little more about this than a lady like yourself" and then he'd go humiliate himself publicly.
Mr. Bennet: Sure, I haven't taken care of my daughters' financial security, but have I at least taken care of their education? No. But have I taken care of their emotional needs? Also no. But have I been a good protector and supervisor? I'm afraid not. However, have I been a good example for my children of being a kind and respectful spouse, parent, and all around human being? No again. But through it all, have I nailed being funny? Yes. And isn't that the most important role of a father after all?
Darcy’s introduction in Pride and Prejudice is really ‘what if you had just had the worst month of your life because your ex-bestie tried to lover boy scam your baby sister out of her share of your dad’s life insurance and your friend dragged you to a shitty party in a dive bar in the neighbourhood where he’d just signed a short term lease, and you decided to let your bad mood show because you were never going to see any of the assholes in this stupid shitty bar EVER again. And your friend ended up making out with a girl he’d just met there while you were stuck talking to her sister who was less cute and then her mother appeared and started trying to matchmake and started saying how if she was twenty years younger she’d clime you like a redwood and ooooh is that a black Amex, guess the next round is on you hahhahahahaha, while her other sister (how many fucking sisters does she have?!) flashed an obviously fake ID at the bar and ordered six vodka-diet red bulls and no one in her family except the less-cute sister even tried to stop her. And you went home and consoled yourself that you would never see any of these people again but then you met them over and over again because they live next door and your friend and the cute sister keep meeting up to make out but not actually date and then. You fall in love with the less-cute sister because it turns out she’s really witty and charismatic but she already knows and remembers and resents the fact that on a day when you were in a shitty mood you called her mid out loud in a dive bar.’
@starweaverblog Greece is considered the cradle of Western civilization so these people unfortunately could not give two shits about any other cultures except Egypt (cuz Egyptomania), and mayyyybe China and then Mesopotamia every now and then.
Follow up to the other pre-canon Rocky x Adrian post. This one is my own personal headcanon where they were childhood friends, drifted apart for a bit, then met again in college and fell in love hard for each other <3
chatgpt is a threat to the symbiotic relationship between fanfic writers and their betas. we are losing our traditions. eradicate the soulless machine and ask your friend who has a full time job and 3 kids to annotate your omegaverse fanfiction like any other responsible adult.
the way rr/tierney introduce ilya is so funny to me because when you first see him you're just like jeez this guy is such an asshole why is he like this. and then seconds later it's just like um it's because he has a 1) dead mom 2) who killed herself 3) an abusive dad 4) with alzheimers 5) a brother 6) who verbally abuses him on the phone 7) when ilya refuses to wire him 50 bands all at once 8) all while he spends new years eve all alone in the grossest motel you've ever seen 9) and he's bisexual.
and you're just like. well shit. that will do it i guess.
what shane means: i can never love a woman in any way resembling the way i love you and when i tried she called my shit IMMEDIATELY so what im trying to say is i can't sidestep whatever we are the way you can, i will never ever love anyone but u
what ilya hears: somewhere along the line of our multi-year situationship that began with me immediately sucking ur dick, i have determined that i like men.
My first attempt at ventriloquism featuring Sockrates, who was sewn by me in the dark and therefore has the structural integrity of the tumblr API if it was left out in the rain
i read an anecdote ages and ages ago from a gay person who grew up with gay parents, and struggled to find any kind of belonging in the gay community because everyone else there was bonding over having homophobic parents. everyone else was defining themselves by their suffering and oppression rather than by their sexuality, leaving this gay person to feel like they weren't really gay because they didn't have the right experiences. they wondered whether more gay people would feel this way as more children grew up with gay parents, if the gay community would leave them behind for not having suffered enough. i think about that anecdote a lot.
a lot of the current rhetoric around gender reminds me of that anecdote. a lot of people are willing to go "transgender people are oppressed for their gender presentation, therefore if you're not oppressed for your gender presentation, you're not trans." but i don't think we should be defining ourselves by our suffering and oppression. what will we do, in a few years, in a few decades, as there start to be, say, adults who were supported in their transition as children? what will we do when a stereotypical trans person can genuinely say they didn't suffer hardship for being trans?
i'm afraid i know the answer. i'm afraid that people are going to close ranks as they've already started closing ranks against intersex people, against nonbinary people, against double binary people, against closeted people. as some people have started closing ranks against people who transitioned in the opposite direction from them. as many people have closed ranks against people with edge case gender experiences. "i don't consider you to be oppressed, therefore you are not welcome to share in this community you might otherwise belong in."
i wish people would understand that we shouldn't do this. i wish people would understand that we benefit from a broader, more inclusive community more than we benefit from whatever purity testing oppression olympics it is that i keep running into.
hollanov brainrot @wispedvellichor - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
