mmy title

[karrakazz]

Just ate an orange #NoScurvy

[killue]

you have a headache because you have powers

[geckyjuno]

my bedsheet is pregnant and it's. the rest of my laundry

[sluttynurse]

But We're Both Eunuchs 😳

[littlegreen]

oh i’m sorry would you rather me beat an alive horse?

[urie]

stop calling it a girl dinner and call it by its formal name: Fend For Yourself dinner in an ingredients household

[queer-reader-07]

[cparti-mkiki]

fingers on my temples, in deep concentration, brain bulging: if i was a supermarket, where would i put the eggs?

[funstyle]

having audio processing issues is so humiliating like yeah i heard you and yeah i was actively listening but the problem is i dont know what the fuck you sayed

[jacobtheloofah]

i was paying attention, i was listening, but you see the problem is....it didnt work

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

my buddy says the craziest stuff when i make him plead for his life

[lizzienoodles]

guy who's having gauzy idealized wife flashbacks for the whole adventure but it turns out she isn't dead or anything he just really misses her and wants to get home

[trainthief]

honestly the only reason im not an old man is that i happen to have been born somewhat recently. other than that 

[clubcope]

bro said he was beleaguered i was like well look what has beset you

[bungerc0re]

if i can be honest if i saw an elf i would hesistate. elves are straight up not normal to see. i would be shocked for a while.

[princepilledboy]

‘puppy want a treat??’ puppy just wants one goddamn day without suffering

[cheaphalloweencostume]

god give me a sign but not that one i just saw

[hella1975]

I <3 MY BED #mybed

[insaneandlovingit]

You would not believe your ass

If ten million largemouth bass.

[problemnyatic]

desired you while the women flee