unfortunate man enjoyer

24 | pan | art but don't expect much | mobile header is by @/theshitpostcalligrapher

[wolfgangsdick]

Using this blog to post warhammer 40k thoughts cause im bored and can't be bothered to make a new one 🥱

Emps posting

Headcanons

Primarch Deity AU

Original Characters

My Art

[wolfgangsdick]

Was thinking of Perturabo in a skirt and them remembered he wears a toga. Life is good

[wolfgangsdick]

Living in peace somewhere for 10k years, just to get dragged back into the same mess.

If Vulkan ever gets reintroduced to the plot, I genuinely don't think he's gonna last long. Like he's gonna sacrifice himself for something, I just know it.

[wolfgangsdick]

A custodes gets too close to the golden throne and Emps swipes them up and drains them like a caprisun

[wolfgangsdick]

Do y'all think feeding Emps a primarch instead of 10k psykers would heal him? If not completely heal, then perhaps enough to regain a bit of strength?

Which primarch to feed him, you ask? Maybe Vulkan, because being a perpetual = very juicy soul. Or perhaps Corvus, who's been marinating in the warp this whole time and would probably taste delicious.

[wolfgangsdick]

Idk guys, the idea of Emps fusing with Vulkan and gaining back the compassion he lost after tossing the star child is very tempting. Not to mention Vulkan ascending as the new emperor.

[wolfgangsdick]

Do y'all think feeding Emps a primarch instead of 10k psykers would heal him? If not completely heal, then perhaps enough to regain a bit of strength?

Which primarch to feed him, you ask? Maybe Vulkan, because being a perpetual = very juicy soul. Or perhaps Corvus, who's been marinating in the warp this whole time and would probably taste delicious.

[wolfgangsdick]

Asking myself the question, which primarchs would announce when they're going to go jerk off, just to come to the conclusion that most of them would within the right situation and with the right delivery. Guilliman, for example, wouldn't boldly yell about needing to go touch himself. He would, however, excuse himself from a conversation by mentioning that he has an appointment in his chambers he needs to attend. Meanwhile, Leman would absolutely just say he's gonna go beat his meat and do the gesture for emphasis

[wolfgangsdick]

the panromantic pansexual to aromantic asexual Emps pipeline is real and true

[revenantwyrm]

The second most powerful psyker in existence…the last of the Sigilites…the God-Emperor’s right hand…he’s so cool to me

More stuff + closeups under the cut

I love the trope of “super powerful being that looks, in the context of the universe, very very normal”, it’s why I love saitama so much lololol. Characters that use their enemies underestimation as an asset are 👌

He’s so perfect to me…little old guy. I have this idea that his staff is made of wood as a symbol of like the burning bush (speaking as the mouthpiece of a “god”) and also as an act of friendship/devotion from Big E.

Conniving little advisor man in a universe of crazy demigod science experiments…🥺

I am sick, that is the only reason you all are getting this much gold detailing🤧

[wolfgangsdick]

Highborn twink who keeps flirting with guilliman and his ass is not getting it. Literally has to jump in bed naked with him for guilliman to put two and two together

[wolfgangsdick]

wherever Dorn is, I hope he's fat, unshaven, and filling with regret from everything that happened during the heresy. Need him with a full beard living like a hermit in some forgotten corner of space, perfect for Guilliman to find, and convince to comeback to help defend against Perturabo

[wolfgangsdick]

Emps says, "I love you" to Mahari and that's an immediate red flag. What do you mean you love me? You don't know how to love anything. Instantly feels like he's trying to manipulate her.

He'd be better off saying he feels protective of her or that he wants her to remain by his side, which would genuinely convey his feeling better. Since the man in fact does not know how to love someone.

[takengrave]

Wonder what the back of his head look like

[omg1wanttidd1es-sb]

Ik he was the one giving birth atp

[soosmain]

I still think abt the chaos gijinkas

[dio-niisio]

Emperor and his loyal sons

[skrankku]

Fighting art block with Magnus pin-up