First things first: this edition is a bit late, due to unforeseeable complications with the printing equipment. In Strictest Confidence apologizes for the delay, and would like to assure its readers that the printing equipment is now fully functional (and is expected to remain so through this school year).
Now we've got business out of the way, let's delve straight into the gossip, shall we?
Of course you all have heard by now of Alecto Carrow's crazy love life. Is she dating Edgar Bones? Bellatrix Black? Amycus Carrow? A combination of those? Speculation has been wild, leading to a heated confrontation between the Carrow twins. Those close to the two refuse to disclose details, and Bellatrix Black even went so far as to threaten yours truly with severe bodily harm if I did not stop "messing about with things that do not concern you." Regardless of her friends' thoughts on the matter, Alecto has agreed to an exclusive interview. You can expect to see this within a matter of days, duckies, and rest assured that all of your lingering questions will be answered.
Speaking of severe bodily harm, Bellatrix was seen shooting fire at Dirk Cresswell. Again, anger management, although maybe anyone stupid enough to call the insane one "Trixie" is asking for it.
The upcoming Quidditch season is looking promising so far. Practices seem to be going well, or at least none of the Captains have murdered their teams yet. Quite a few players--and some who can barely mount a broom--have taken the opportunity to practice around the pitch. Emma Vanity appeared to be trying to play a full game by herself, and later on Regulus Black practiced his flying while Lily Evans practiced not falling off her broomstick. From what I heard, that one's better off staying firmly on the ground. Those two are getting along surprisingly well, especially when you remember her blowing up at him at the Slug Club Dinner. Funny how these things work, isn't it?
Speaking of Lily Evans, there's been something not quite right with the Marauders as of late. Remus Lupin and Sirius Black have allegedly been fighting about something probably so insignificant they've both forgotten it by now. Their little lover's quarrel is tearing the four friends apart--or at least, it will if they don't sort it out soon. Although if they do end up parting ways, you can bet the little band of Marauders' fangirls will swoop in. This includes Dirk Cresswell, by the way, judging from his lingering glances at the four during Charms and Transfiguration and History of Magic and...well, all the time.
And as long as we're on the subject of young love tearing people apart, I wonder how much Andromeda Black has told her sisters of her little romp in the lake with Ted Tonks? I can't imagine either Bellatrix nor Narcissa being too pleased with this information, and I don't see it ending well for anyone involved.
The Welcome Back party was successful, as usual. There will be a more involved article devoted to this later, but for now, let's sum things up. Marlene McKinnon got really drunk, Alecto Carrow and Bellatrix Black got a little punch-drunk, Edgar Bones and Septima Vector tried (and failed) to keep the peace, and Gilderoy Lockhart thought the party was for him. No surprises there, of course.
That's all for this edition, duckies. As always, keep sending in your opinions and gossip and letters, and keep stirring the cauldron, as it were. Until next time in the nutshell, lovelies.
