Everyone had a soulmate, reciprocated or not. That was a fact you'd learned at a young age. Some were common, like not being able to see colours until meeting them, or being able to hear their thoughts. Some were not so common, such as feeling their physical pain. That one was familiar to you, with one of your closest friends unlucky enough to have it. You were glad it wasn't yours, too. You didn't think you could handle that. Come to think of it, yours had never made itself obvious. You didn't hear their thoughts or feel their pain, you could see colour and you didn't have their birthday on your skin like a tattoo. No, you didn't experience any of the powers you'd read about. You were beginning to think the whole thing was a lie, and that you didn't have a soulmate, but you were proved wrong.
You were only a teenager when it first made its ugly appearance. A boy you'd had a crush on for a while had finally asked you on a date. Naïvely, at the time you thought a crush meant that they were your soulmate. You wondered why people needed any hints, surely having a crush was enough of a sign, right? He'd taken you to the annual summer fair. You knew he didn't like rides that much, but he knew how excited you were. The thought that he would go to an event he wasn't fond of just because you were made your heart flutter. It was a surprise, to say the least, that neither of your parents tagged along on the date to spy on the two of you. You wouldn't have blamed them, after all your parents didn't know him, know what he was like, and his parents didn't know you.
He turned out not to be as shy as you'd thought, not that you minded at all. You were glad he was so comfortable around you, because you were a nervous wreck. And it was his boldness that led you to finally discover what your soulmate power was. You could almost have tasted the lip balm he was wearing then, a sickly sweet flavour you couldn't quite put your finger on. He leant his forehead against yours, noses bumping and sorrys muttered. Your eyes fell closed, waiting for him to kiss you, but he never did. Wondering if he'd played you, your eyes snapped open. The way his cheeks were flushed and his lips were parted told a different story. He was… surprised? About what? Was he not going to kiss you? Maybe you had the wrong idea. "I.. I.." his eyes flickered to the ground and back to you.
For a few days afterwards, he practically ignored you at school. It hurt, the feeling that he had been playing with you making your heart sting. The first words he spoke when he finally did speak to you again were "I'm sorry". You stood in front of him, feeling like a fool but refusing to look like one, although him being in front of you made it hard to speak. "I shouldn't have ran off like that, and I shouldn't have ignored you." He swallowed. "I just- I didn't know what to say and it hurt and.. I think you deserve to know why." You crossed your arms, not warming up to his apology just yet. "I was gonna kiss you, I really was." But you didn't. "But I couldn't." You were confused. Why couldn't he? Did he already have feelings for someone else? Your heart panged at the thought. "Y/N I- I think I know your soulmate power, if that's what you'd call it." You hummed, interested. "When I say I couldn't kiss you.." You waited, heart stopping still. "I physically couldn't. It was as if there was a brick wall between us. I'm sorry, Y/N."
You always knew who to turn to in these moments, and as soon as you got home from school, you went over to your best friend's house. Although at this point it was pretty much your house too, from the amount of time you spent there, Renjun was surprised to see you out of the blue. Within a second, your arms were wrapped around his torso and tears were falling onto his shirt. He asked you what was wrong, offering to make you the biggest hot chocolate you'd ever seen. You sniffled. "I think I know what my power is." Renjun fell silent, pausing his actions. He didn't look at you, just hummed in encouragement, stirring an empty mug. "I went on a date today and.." he dropped the spoon he was holding, a loud metallic clunking ringing out. Renjun cursed under his breath, giving you a sheepish smile.
"He couldn't kiss me, Jun. He tried but he- for some reason he said something was stopping him." Your best friend knew at that moment that two large hot chocolates would be necessary. "If I'd asked what his power was I could've figured out from the start that he wasn't my soulmate." You hugged your knees close to your chest. "Have you figured out yours, yet?" Renjun panicked. What should he say? Should he tell the truth? No, he couldn't. But he didn't want to lie, either, not to you. "Junnie?" He snapped out of his thoughts, flashing you a small smile and shaking his head. He told you that he wasn't all that fussed about soulmates, at least not yet. Come to think of it, he never really spoke about any crushes to you, so this made perfect sense. You, half-jokingly, warned him not to try and kiss anyone in case he had your power too.
Renjun wasn't sure why he'd lied to you. Perhaps it was because you were hurt and he felt uncomfortable with saying the truth. It wasn't the right time, he figured. But now he felt bad because he could've spared you the tears. If only he could bring himself to remind you of a certain memory. It wasn't fair, why could you forget, yet he thought about it all the time? You were only about 7 at the time, so maybe you didn't find it as important as he did to begin with. Maybe he shouldn't have held on to it, but now he knew your power, his heart was going wild. Perhaps, by some wild chance, the puzzle pieces fit. Perhaps, if only he'd mentioned that kiss, you'd realise. Because the same thing that had happened to you, had happened to him a couple of times. It was confusing at the time, but one of his friends mentioned reading about that power once. Just like now, Renjun had remembered kissing you when you were younger. He'd never tell anyone, no, his friends would never let him live it down.
In the end he didn't have to tell you. After a few days crying about your date, you randomly found yourself reading your long-abandoned diary. Most of the things you'd written made you cringe, but the entry for the 1st of November made your breath hitch. It was the day you and Renjun had kissed. Did he remember? He must have forgotten, otherwise why didn't he mention it before? Your cheeks heated up, things suddenly making sense. He could kiss you and no one else could. If he had the same power as you, then that meant you were destined for each other. But that wasn't guaranteed since he still didn't know his power. You knew, though, that such a case wouldn't change a thing. He had always been your soulmate in your head, not necessarily the romantic kind before, but you knew if anything, the bond you shared with Renjun could survive a one-sided soulmate situation.
So there you were, head in his lap as his thumb grazed your knuckles. You wanted to say something, but you were nervous. And he was too, but he managed to fake a calm expression. "Have you ever kissed someone?" As soon as the words left your mouth you regretted them. Was it weird to ask, knowing what the truth was? Renjun gulped, ears turning red. You weren't sure if he remembered kissing you or if he'd kissed someone else since. Oddly, you weren't too fond of the second option. Was it because you were scared that your soulmate bond was one-sided and you'd get hurt? Renjun wasn't sure if he should come clean and remind you that he'd kissed you, or if he should lie and say no, seeing as you clearly didn't remember. But he couldn't, even if it was only one-sided. He couldn't lie to you anymore.
And that's why he stared down at you, his favourite pair of eyes staring back up at him taking his breath away. "You." Both of you felt yourselves blush at the statement. Your heart must've been doing acrobatics inside your chest or something, because it was bouncing around like a kid who'd had too much sugar. "I've only ever been able to kiss you." He hoped you'd get the hint from that. You nearly choked on air when he said that, the sudden realisation that not only did he remember, but that he had the same soulmate power as you. He was yours and you were his, as you'd always been. Renjun's heart couldn't take it. The longer you stared at him without saying a word, he wondered if he'd made things awkward by saying that. Until you spoke.
Things have been very lonely recently, to tell you the truth. I spoke to Mark briefly and he told me he needs some time to get his thoughts together but he promised he wouldn't let this ruin our friendship. I hope that's true. I miss him so much but I'll give him as much time as he needs. I miss you, too. Lately I've been keeping to myself because I can't face you just yet. Not yet. When did everything get so complicated? I wish things were the way they were before all of this. "Happy" New Year's my ass. This year is already much worse than the last, and we're only in February right now. I wonder how you've been, though. I keep seeing the boys and wanting to ask but I don't want to risk making my feelings known. Not even to them. I don't even know why I'm so upset, it's not like you're mine, is it? I'm not mad because you can kiss whoever you want, I just… I selfishly wish it was me instead. I wish for so many things but that won't change anything, will it? Well, surprisingly I received a Valentine's Day card this year. I can't remember the last time that happened. I wondered if it was Mark at first but I'm not sure he would send one considering what happened at the party… A part of me wishes that it was you, but I doubt that it was. You're far too good for me, chicken wing. This is all so confusing. Who sent it? Why? I just miss you, I miss Mark, I miss the boys. Should I just pretend that the party never happened? I could try, if it meant that I could spend time with you again. Perhaps all of these assignments will keep me busy from thinking of you too much. Who am I kidding? I don't think anything could keep me from thinking of you. That's just how precious you are to me, first love.
Little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I think you’d like to know that I spoke briefly to Mark a couple of weeks ago. Things are still awkward between us but at least things are better than they were a couple of months ago. I’m sure it’s just a small crush, it’s nothing major, right? I really hope so. I also haven’t seen you much recently, and even when I have seen you, we haven’t really spoken. Perhaps you're bored of me or annoyed by now and that’s why you haven’t greeted me lately. Or perhaps you know about how I feel, and this is your way of rejecting me. But you didn’t see me react to your kiss, right? At least I don’t think you did. Sometimes I think that you’re fed up of me by now, but that might be the fever talking... You may have heard from Guanheng that I’ve been sick a lot recently. That’s made everything worse, I think. Lying in bed all day, no distraction from thinking about the situation between you and I. Well, that makes it sound like there is anything between us.. which would never happen, would it? I think I’ve started to accept that now. Anyway, that’s enough of me rambling on about myself. How have you been doing lately? I heard that you also got sick. Are you alright now? I hope you ate well and slept a lot! I’m sure you probably heard all of that from papa Kun, though. Of course, I can’t hear or read your answer because you’re not reading this, but these are just some of the things I want to say to you. I wish things weren’t so complicated recently :(
Little dumpling
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Dear first love,
We'll be graduating in a few weeks. Isn't it scary to think that we're about to leave this place behind? All of the friends that we've made, the routine that we've gotten used to over the years. I don't want to leave it behind. These past few years have been the best few years of my life. I hate to sound so sentimental but you and the boys have really changed my life. Before, I only had a few friends who I wasn't even that close to. I never really want to parties, and I didn't really want to. I was happy being at the back of the room. But then you guys walked in to my life and I felt like I had another family. I know things haven't always been easy between all of us. There have been little arguments amongst.. other dilemmas, but we've always stuck together. You don't find many friends like that outside of here. I really wish we can all just stay together but I know that some of us, including you, will be going back home. I might never see your face again, my first love. But maybe things will be okay without you. Of course, I'll always wish that we weren't separated, but life always goes on, doesn't it? I'll miss you so much. You'll never realise how precious you are to me, as a friend and as my crush. I hope that someone as kind and sweet as you will find happiness wherever you go. I hope good fortune follows you back to China and continues to follow your every footstep. I really want you to know all of these things, even if I can't find the strength to say even half of them to you in person. I want you to have all of these memories of our time together, even if they mean little to you now. If we meet again, I know I wouldn't be able to look at you because you would know how I feel for you, but I would be happy to see you living well. Because I wish for you to be able to read all of these letters, I have decided that I will give them to you. If you're reading these now, then that means you found the package I left for you, and that also means you cared enough to read until the end. Please live happily and without regrets and always be happy <3
Little dumpling
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3 years later...
Beep beep!
My eyes flickered over to my phone, who buzzed beside me, alerting me of a new message. I groaned, realising that it was probably my boss asking me to do extra shifts again. As if I didn't work enough already. I sighed and picked up my phone to see what the text said, only to be proven wrong. Mark. Well that's a name I haven't heard in a while. My mind took me back to the good old times, like helping him study for a test by buying him coffee and waking him up when he starting dozing off every two minutes. He passed. And the time he forgot to buy his mum a present and panic called me asking me to come with him to pick one out because he didn't want to go alone. We were always close. And I thought that we always would be. Smiling sadly to myself, I read the text aloud in a whisper.
From: Mork 😎
Hey. I know we haven't spoken in a while. I'm really sorry about that. You know I still care; I always did and always will. I miss you, sidekick, I miss you so much. I hate myself for throwing away our friendship over a silly little crush, I was an idiot. I'll understand if you don't want to talk, especially as I haven't said a word to you in three years and now I'm basically writing you an essay saying sorry for being the dumbest boy on the face of the planet. Will you forgive me? And will you also forgive me for asking if you wanna come to the new year's reunion party? The boys will be there… xx
A smile found its way onto my face whilst reading his text. So he did care, after all. I should have been mad at him. Mad at him for ignoring me for three years. Mad at him for pretending I didn't exist whenever we bumped into each other. But I wasn't. I couldn't be, not when it came to Mark. And the promise of seeing the other boys only fuelled my excitement. I was finally ready to see them after living the past three years of my life in a brand-new city with a brand-new job and brand-new friends. No friend group could ever compare to the boys, and I think I always knew that they would never, even before I graduated. I wiped away a tear I didn't realise had slipped out and typed a short, but meaningful and poetic response.
To: Mork 😎
I missed you too, nerd.
I grinned to myself. Everything he needed to know was in that text. Yes, I forgave him. Yes, I missed him too. No, I wasn't mad at him. Yes, I would come to the party. Yes, he was a class a idiot.
And the gang was coming back together.
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I stood in the middle of the room with a glass of juice in my hand, chewing my lip. I was so nervous and excited to see everyone again. I wondered how much they had changed since I last saw them. Would they even recognise me? Would I even recognise them? These worries washed away the moment I heard my name be called. I looked up and was unable to hold back a grin. “Guanheng! Mark! Oldie!” I cheered. Kun groaned and rolled his eyes, but I could see a smile tugging on his lips as he pulled me in for a hug. This was home, these people had always felt like a second family to me. It felt just like old times, except everyone was slightly older and (mostly) wiser. I suddenly frowned, turning to Guanheng. “Wait.. you guys came back? Just for this?” He and Kun nodded, telling me about their plans to potentially move here for good. Not only so that they would be closer to us, but also because they both had work lined up here for them, and the work was apparently pretty decent. I suddenly felt excitement rush through me at the thought of regularly hanging out with them just like before.
I felt a hand on my shoulder. “A certain someone also came back.” I heard a familiar voice add. I instantly recognised the voice as Johnny's. I spun around to hug him tightly, too. I had missed that tall idiot. I tried to figure out in my head who he was referring to, when I laid eyes on him.
He was here. Now I suddenly felt nervous. Why was I nervous? I had moved on with my life and now all of our moments were just fond memories. But I couldn’t ignore the way the sight of him made my heart race, just as it did the day we met. I suddenly felt incredibly aware of the ugly sweater I was wearing, which I had bought as a joke. I knew that the boys would appreciate it, but now it just made me feel stupid in front of the man that had captured my heart. But I didn’t have those feelings for him anymore, right? "Sicheng?" My mouth hung open and I was frozen to the spot. I wasn't expecting him to be here, especially since the last I'd heard of him, he had moved back to China and was staying there. He grinned at me and suddenly I was very confused. "I missed you, my little dumpling." He said softly. My cheeks heated up, realising that he had read my letters and now he knew exactly how I felt about him. How I still feel about him. Now I realised that despite my head telling me that I was over him, I would never be. The way I felt towards him would never fade, and perhaps I didn't want it to. "I- you- I thought you- China?" I breathed out, making him chuckle.
"I stayed there for a while, but there was just something missing, and I wasn't quite sure what it was. That's the reason I came back here. And now, well I just found out what was missing, so I guess I'm staying here for good." Sicheng moved towards me and wrapped me in his arms. I let my eyes flutter shut as I enjoyed the feeling I always longed for. "I enjoyed your letters, by the way dumpling. I wasn't surprised, though." I pulled back, blinking rapidly.
"You.. you knew that I liked you? All along?" I suddenly felt stupidly self-conscious.
He shrugged, smiling at the ground and then looking back up at me. "I had a hunch, but I wasn't completely sure if I was right." I stared at him, dumbfounded. I wasn't quite sure how to respond to that confession, so I let the silence fall over us. Eventually, he broke the silence.
"Instead of writing letters back, I decided that if and when we met again, I would say this all in person in case I don't get another chance. So here it goes." He took a deep breath before looking into my eyes. "When we first met, you tried speaking Chinese to me. I was excited because apart from the other Chinese students, I couldn't really speak to anyone much because my Korean wasn't as good then. I thought you were absolutely adorable because your eyebrows were all like this," He scrunched his face up, imitating me. "And it seemed like you were trying really hard. I could tell that you were a kind-hearted person just from that one small action." Sicheng smiled fondly, letting his eyes fall shut for a few moments before continuing. "Our kiss... I won’t lie, it was strange for me. I hadn't even thought of you in that way before. Until then I had only thought of you as a cute friend who I wanted to look out for. Admittedly it felt a bit awkward for me, but I didn't want to pull away for some reason." His cheeks turned a light pink and he scratched the back of his neck, avoiding my gaze. His tongue darted out to wet his lips. He turned his head away from me, taking a sip of his drink before looking back at me. I was still dumbfounded, trying to somehow digest what he was telling me. What did he mean by all of this? Was this a rejection? It would certainly be a belated rejection if it was.
Sicheng placed one of his hands on my back, guiding me away from where our friends were crowded, too busy in conversation to realise that we were no longer standing nearby.
"Do you remember when we were at the football match together? Spending time together like that felt really good. I actually wanted to give you a hug then. I had it all planned out, I would ask you if you were cold and then hug you to warm you up, but then I got shy and didn't do it. I was kicking myself for the rest of the night calling myself an idiot for not having the guts to hug you. It wasn’t as if I was proposing to you or anything.” He face palmed, and I let out a laugh. If only I had known that he wanted to hug me, I would have given him a hug myself. All that time I spent wondering if he would be weirded out or push me away if I had tried to hug him, and he was wanting the exact same thing the whole time. "And I was so mad that I couldn't be there to watch your performance. I made sure I had enough storage on my phone to take pictures and videos of you, but then I got a call to say that rehearsals had been rescheduled to that night. I was tempted to curse them out but I hoped maybe I'd have another chance to see you perform." Sadly, he didn’t get another chance to see me perform, because after that I only worked backstage, although he did come and see that performance, which did make me feel a sense of pride. "When me and Mark walked you home, I was super nervous. Nervous because I wanted to be alone with you, but he was there. If I'm honest, I noticed you smiling at me a lot and it only made my hands even more sweaty." Wait what? He was nervous? Around me? If only Mark hadn’t have been there, not that I didn’t want him there of course. I stayed silent, still unsure of how to respond, and still trying to process what was going on. Sicheng was rambling on about his side of the story and how he felt about the memories I wrote about in my letters and he looked as adorable ever with his cheeks flushed and a grin on his face.
"You remember when I asked you to come to my party? My smile was because of you, and the thought of you being there at my party. I guess that's the point where I first realised that I might have feelings for you, but I wasn't quite sure yet." My eyes widened. Feelings? He had feelings for me too? Oh wow, I really was dumb, wasn’t I? No wonder we never got together. Still, hearing that his smile was caused by my presence filled me with happiness. "And at the party, you kept looking at me in a way that made me suspect that you were dressing up for me, but I didn't want to assume in case I was wrong." Oh, this was embarrassing. He pretty much knew that I had put more effort into my outfit just for him and I was staring at him enough for him to catch on to my feelings. If I didn’t already want the ground to open up and swallow me whole, I definitely did after hearing that. Sicheng chuckled, guiding me even further away from the group. "How could I forget our little cooking show? I was waiting for episode two but it never came." He shook his head, glancing at me to see my reaction. I smiled fondly to myself. I definitely wouldn’t have minded an episode two. "I loved joking around with you and hearing you laugh. That's one of our memories that I treasure the most because it was just us two, and it felt so natural. I can't believe I still didn't realise I liked you." Perhaps I wasn’t the only idiot between the two of us. That sounded a lot like someone who had a major crush on someone to me. He looked back at our friends, watching them enjoying each other’s company. It looked like they had started having their own mini dance battle. Me and Sicheng watched the others for a few moments before he turned to look back at me. "If you wanted to, we could have another dance lesson. I enjoyed it a lot last time. I actually felt pretty proud hearing that you wanted me, of all people, to teach you. Your dancing was the most adorable thing I've ever seen. You know, I wanted to hold you because you made my heart race so fast. As for the food... I brought it with me because I knew that you would forget to bring snacks, and also because I wanted to show you how good of a boyfriend I would be." He grinned shyly. "And how dare you assume that you didn't make me fall for you! You were making me suffer from how cute you we're being!!" My heart was melting faster than an ice cream on a hot summer’s day by now. My face was so hot that anyone who didn’t know what we were talking about would have thought I had a fever.
"I don't think I'll ever be a dancer, though." I joked, covering my mouth with my free hand. Sicheng took my hand and moved it away from my mouth, eyes flickering to my smile which I disliked with a passion. He shrugged, telling me that practice makes perfect.
"I'll never forget our date at the zoo, either." Maybe it was a bad idea to take a sip of my drink as he said that, because now I was almost choking on my drink. He had said the word ‘date’ about me and him. He considered it a date. "Even though I didn't say anything, that's how I thought of it, as a date. I still have those photos of us, by the way. I had one of them as my lock screen for a long time, and if ever I was sad, I only had to look at the picture to smile." The thought of a picture of me and him being his lock screen made my heart flutter. Wasn't that the kind of thing that couples usually did? Sicheng pulled his phone out of his pocket and showed me the picture. I was leaning into him and his arm was placed loosely around me, not quite touching me. I had managed to convince him to wear a headband with tiger ears on it, which was the cutest thing ever. "At the Christmas party, I was secretly wishing that we'd get caught under some mistletoe so that I had an excuse to kiss you. I kept having those thoughts and that was something completely new to me. I'd never wanted to kiss someone so bad before. And your little Christmas sweater.. that sweater looked so good on you; did you not realise how nervous I was around you?" I shook my head, still refusing to believe the words coming out of his mouth. We were almost outside now, only a few steps from standing out on Johnny's balcony. My heart was still pounding so loud that I was afraid of Sicheng being able to hear it.
His smile fell, his eyebrows scrunching up tightly. "I had no idea you saw that kiss. I saw yours. It was only whilst reading your letters that I realised that I was in the exact same boat as you. Both of us saw the other person kissing someone else and assumed that they didn't have feelings for us. And both of us were kissed by someone who we didn't have feelings for." He chewed his lip, then shook his head, letting out a small laugh. "I was really worried that you didn't like me anymore. I would have been happy for you and Mark, though." He glanced at me, and then back at Mark, who was giggling hysterically at something and clapping his hands together. I had never quite seen him that way, so the idea felt strange to me, but I could also understand his thinking. "What about Valentine's Day? Did you wonder who that card was from? I can't believe you didn't recognise my handwriting." My mouth fell open. Him?? He sensed my surprise and bit his lip. "Yeah, I wrote it, but I never sent it."
I furrowed my eyebrows. I was confused. What did he mean he didn't send it? How did it end up in my possession? "Some of the boys knew that I liked you, so it must have been one of them. I wasn't going to send it because I still thought you and Mark were a thing, but I was tempted to do it anyway." We were standing outside on the balcony now, the small breeze making his hair flutter just as much as he was making my heart flutter. Not only was I incredibly close to him, but he was also telling me that he had a crush on me back then. The possibility of him still feeling that way now made my head spin.
"I regret the last few months before graduation. I really should have handled it better. I felt bad because you seemed to be ignoring me and then I was worried that for whatever reason you didn't like me anymore. And then I read your letter and I realised that I might just be the most stupid man on the planet. This is me saying sorry for acting so stupidly, and to say sorry for not confessing to you even though I had a feeling that you felt the same." I opened my mouth to say something, but was interrupted by a loud noise coming from inside Johnny’s house.
"Five!" People inside cheered. Sicheng turned to look at me with a smitten grin on his face. "Four!" I chewed my lip, wondering if he had the same thoughts as me. "Three!" He moved closer to me, eyes locked on mine. I couldn't look away from him. "Two!" His hands were now cupping my cheeks and my heart was doing backflips and loop-de-loops. "One!" I barely heard the cheering. All I could focus on was the fact that Sicheng had just kissed me. The winter breeze outside was bitter, but the heat rising to my cheeks kept me warm. I kissed him back, feeling him grin against my mouth. I wrapped my arms around his torso, pulling him even closer to me. Fireworks were going off all around us, and suddenly I didn't despise New Year celebrations anymore.
So you heard, from either Guanheng or Mark, I assume, that I wanted you to teach me how to dance. I mean, I was sort of serious, I thought it could be a good way to get closer to you whilst doing something fun. I wasn’t actually expecting them to tell you, though. I should thank you for actually offering to teach me, and for not laughing at my bad dancing. I was surprised that you bought food and drinks for me, I really wasn’t expecting you to do that. The food was tasty, thank you. You keep making me fall for you more and more with your sweet actions. It’s not fair, how do I make your heart melt? How do I make you fall for me the way I have done for you? I keep hoping maybe I’ll get really good at dancing and your heart will flutter. I can hope, huh? You were really patient with me, I appreciated that. I think I would have gotten frustrated after a while! Also, did you notice that my Mandarin improved a lot? I’ve been studying hard recently! Guanheng still doesn’t know that I’m learning for you, I think he thinks I’m learning because a lot of the boys speak the language and not because I have feelings for you. We talked a lot whilst you taught me, it was fun. Did you enjoy it too? I hope maybe we can do it again in the future, even though I’m nowhere near as talented as you are. Even if I mess up all of the steps, I would be a fun time as long as I get to spend it with you! I wish I had something to share with you in return as a thank you, but you’re already into acting, so it’s nothing new to you. What can I do?
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
Guess how long it’s been since we met! It’s been a whole two years!! Right now it’s nearing the summer holidays and I’m really looking forward to it. Especially since we made plans to hang out over the summer, both alone and with the boys. Just as long as we don’t go camping, I don’t want anyone to break a bone or anything. Perhaps we could visit the zoo! Or maybe the beach? Again, I would love to go to the theme park all together, but I can imagine that it would be chaos! Can you imagine a group of teens running around like kids in a sweetshop? Yeah... maybe that would be one for just us two, or us and a couple others. That would be nice, wouldn’t it? Oh, but I forgot you’re afraid of heights, aren’t you, my little chicken wing? Perhaps that wouldn’t be such a good idea after all.. I’m sure we’ll find something that everyone wants to do! Do you have any other plans for the summer holidays? I know you said something about trying to visit home for a week or two, I hope you get to spend some quality time with your family, you must miss them a lot. My summer holidays will be spent either hanging out with you and the boys or doing random little doodles when I get bored of eating ice cream in the park. Ha, just kidding, I’ll never get tired of eating ice cream. Especially if the other person is paying ;). I should do a doodle of you, but I would have to do a doodle of everyone so it doesn’t seem like I’m only drawing you. After all, I don’t want to make my feelings obvious, especially because I don’t know how you feel… Damn, why can’t I just tell you? It seems so silly to be so scared. You wouldn’t run away, right?
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
Summer flew by fast! I think it's because I had a lot of fun. We should be able to meet up once before school starts again, right? We got the chance to hang out a lot over the summer, which was amazing. We all went to the beach a couple of times... that was complete chaos, but it was funny when we all tried to throw Mark in the water. He still uses that against me. You wouldn't believe how many ice creams he's gotten out of me. At least YangYang managed to get us free ice cream out of the oldie hehe. Did you enjoy the little water fight? We were on the same team, weren't we? I always knew you were secretly competitive! You were a good shot, better than me at least. I wish we could do that again some time. There's always next summer, isn't there? I hope we'll all stay in contact when we leave. It's our last year here now, and then we will have graduated. It's kind of sad to think that I may never see you and the other boys after then, but I hope we at least talk sometimes, even if it's not as much as we do now. I'm just gonna enjoy this year as much as I can and make even more amazing memories with you! We made plans to hang out often, assuming school doesn't get in the way too much. I won't be doing any performing this year, I have enough on my plate with exams and that, but I volunteered to be a stagehand, so I'll still be pretty busy. Not too busy that I can't see you, I hope. Maybe we can all go bowling again like we did over the summer. It was a little difficult since we couldn't all play against one another, but it was fun to have a friendly competition. And how could I forget? You and me going to the zoo together, just the two of us. It turns out you were just as excited to see all of the animals as I was. Although I wasn't just happy because of seeing the animals, but because I got to spend time with you, too. We took many photos, didn't we? I hope we can both look back at that day with fondness. I know I will. If only it could have been a date, but I will settle for a hangout for now. Perhaps one day?
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
It was your birthday on Wednesday! You're another year older and wiser (and sweeter) now. I know this year it was a bit less organised than before, but everyone has been busy with school work recently so we had less time to make proper plans. It's regretful, especially since this is the last year celebrating your birthday like this. Still, it was nice to have a more relaxing celebration, don't you think? Well, apart from Lucas starting a high note battle and nearly getting us kicked out. But it's those kind of memories that we'll keep in our hearts. The two of you had two cakes (lucky!). Unfortunately one of them was allowed to be decorated by Donghyuk and Guanheng… sorry about that. They really made a mess, didn't they? Still, they were proud of their "artwork". It was cute, though… kinda. You looked really happy the whole time, I don't think I ever saw that smile leave your face, not even for one second. I'm really glad that spending time with us made you so happy. We also celebrated Halloween together, didn't we? It was pretty cool seeing everyone dress up in fun costumes. You looked super handsome as always! It probably wasn't a good idea to watch spooky movies though. All I kept hearing was someone screaming… and I could see a few of the boys hiding behind cushions. But then Johnny put on a Halloween playlist and we had a mini rave. I don't think I've ever seen anyone waving strawberry pencils like a lightstick before. It's these sort of things we learn not to question after a while, huh? It was good to spend more time with you, school has been pretty hectic recently. It seems that every class has a million and one assignments to complete and to blink would be wasting time. Still, that's no excuse not to party! ...Maybe that's why I'm so behind. I hope things are going well for you. I hope your classes aren't too crazy and that work isn't piled up high for you <3
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
Christmas has come and gone! How was it for you? I heard that you went home to see your family this year. I know how much you've been missing them from the conversations that we've had lately. I keep seeing photos of you and your family on your Instagram. You look absolutely adorable in that Christmas sweater! I can tell how happy you are to be home from how wide your smile is and from the twinkle in your eyes. I wish for you to be that happy always. I can't wait to hear all about your Christmas when school starts again. I wonder what sort of presents you got. I bet you got something really cool, right? Did you eat well? There was so much food for me, but I ate a lot! I mostly received money and small gifts but I treasure those gifts a lot because they were so thoughtful. Did you enjoy the presents you got from me and the boys? I know mine wasn't that much but it's the thought that counts, right? I know how much you like those. Are you flying back for New Year's Eve? Johnny is throwing a party to see in the new year. I hope that you'll be there but if not, then happy new year. I hope next year treats you even better. Time seems to fly by so fast, doesn't it? It feels like only a week ago that the year began, yet it's already ending! Are you planning on making a resolution? I never stick to mine. I always promise myself that I'll eat healthier, or procrastinate less, or sleep better but I never do. I wonder if it's the same for you.
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I wasn't going to write another letter so soon but I have to get these feelings out of my head and onto this page. I'm glad you were there for the party. You looked handsome as ever, although was I really expecting you not to? You were wearing the cutest sweater I've ever seen. It looked so good on you, but then again what doesn't look good on you? That was… I'm sorry. I'm glad you enjoyed the party. It was nice to spend time with you again after not seeing you for a bit. I heard all about your Christmas with your family. It made me wish I had been there, it sounded so homely and sweet. Your family sound lovely. It's no wonder you're such a sweet person when your family is also that sweet. Still, I'm now wishing that I was busy that day. Or sick. Or for some reason I hadn't been there. As much as it kills me to say that, that's how I feel. Despite being so happy to see you and talk to you and spend lots of time with you, I wish that I hadn't been there. But we can't take back that now, can we? If you were reading this now I bet you'd be wondering why I felt like this, wouldn't you? It sounds so silly, and I shouldn't be so upset over it, but it still hurts. I had always wished that one day I'd have a new years kiss. Maybe I should have been more specific with that wish. I felt so bad. It'll be awkward to see Mark tomorrow. Actually, I don't know if I will. It depends how things go I guess, but I hope things will be okay between us, he's the best best friend I've ever had and I don't want to lose that. I feel bad that he was kissing me yet the only person I could see was you. I feel bad that I don't feel that way for him, and now our friendship is threatened by one stupid kiss. And I wish I felt that way for him because then it wouldn't hurt so much seeing you kissing someone else… I don't know if you have feelings for them or not, but either way the image still makes me heart feel heavy.
I don’t know what I was expecting. I was, of course, hoping that you would be there to see the performance, but I also can’t expect you to be there. You were probably busy practicing, right? Or perhaps you just didn’t want to come, which is fine too! You didn’t have to. I think it went well! I think Guanheng and Mark got some good photos of it if you wanted to see them. Many people said that they enjoyed the performance, or at least that’s what the boys said, they may have been just hyping it up for me though! How was your week? I imagine it was tiring, no? It looked like you had bags under your eyes at lunch. Please rest well, my little chicken wing. You worry me when you don’t look after yourself! I enjoyed spending time with you and some of the boys, though. You waved at me so cutely, I thought my heart would burst. Ahh, our friends would never let me live it down if they knew I wrote such cheesy words for you. I really mean it, though. What were you doing smiling at me so brightly? Is it your intention to kill me off? Especially when I continue to “protect” you from everyone’s affection. I wonder if you’ll be at Donghyuk’s birthday party next Friday, I assume so. To be honest, me and him aren’t even that close and I was invited, so I can only assume you will be too. If not, I will invite you! You can eat some more delicious cake and play some more games, although if any kissing comes up, I think I will sit those games out after last time. Not that I didn’t enjoy it, I just don’t want to make things weird between us. I hope maybe you'll be there?
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
The past couple of months have been crazy, haven’t they? Did you enjoy Donghyuk’s party? I was so anxious about inviting you, but you told me that you’d already been invited anyway. Oops! I think the both of us ate a lot, there were a lot of tasty snacks, after all. I’m glad that we got to speak a lot at the party, it was good to talk more to you and to ge to know one another more. I hope that we will only get closer as the months pass. At least no one had to kiss each other, although Donghyuk did dare Johnny to lick the carpet. At least Kun was there to stop him from actually doing it, who knows what bacteria is on that boy’s floor! You really didn’t have to come with Mark when he walked me back home.. but I’m glad you did. Even if it was a little awkward because I was trying so hard not to smile too much at you, I’m glad. Can you believe that it’s already been a year since we first met? It feels as though we only met a month ago. How did the dance competition go, by the way? I saw a video of part of your performance, you were amazing! Even though I’d already seen you dance before, I was still blown away by your talent. I bet you did really well. I do wish I could have been there watching and cheering you on, but I was too nervous to ask you if I could go along. The last thing I’d want is for you to think I’m a weirdo.. Anyway, I heard that you saw the pictures from my performance. What did you think? I am slightly worried that Mark may have taken some unflattering photos of me just to embarrass me, please forget that image of me!
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I have to do a project with some of the boys, and I’m a little nervous because I don’t know them well but they must be good people if you’re friends with them, right? We have a couple of girls on our team that I’ve never spoken to before, too. I think they’re only there for Lucas, though, cause they keep giving him heart eyes.. but then again, so does Jungwoo! :D I also recently got to meet your friend Yangyang for the first time. Isn’t he cute?? Not quite cuter than you, though, my little chicken wing. You’re the cutest of all. Oh! How could I forget? It’s your birthday soon! I heard that it’s probably going to be a joint party for you and Yuta. I want to get you a present but I don’t know if you want one from me. Ahh, I’ll just get one anyway. It’s the sentiment that matters above anything, after all. If I don’t get invited I’ll still see you on your birthday and I’ll wish you a happy birthday! You’re another year older to no longer being a ‘little’ chicken wing hehe. I bet you’ll have lots of fun, the others really know how to throw a good party. I wish they could throw a party for mine. As much as I loved having Guanheng and Mark singing happy birthday to me in the park whilst holding a burger with a candle stuck in the middle of it, I do wish I could have spent it with you. Don’t get me wrong, I love those two, but it’s not the same. I wonder if they threw me a party, would you be there? I like to think we’ve become more comfortable with one another now, right? We’ve had many conversations by now, so that must mean something, or at least it does to me.
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I’m not going to lie, when you came up to me after class that day and asked if I wanted to go to your party I melted. I wasn’t expecting you to invite me at all, especially not personally, but of course I was happy that you did. That means you wanted me there, right? I still feel the butterflies in my tummy just remembering the way you smiled at me. Has anyone told you you literally have the most beautiful smile ever? Because you do, and I will never get over it. I want to see you happy like that always, even if it’s not because of me. You may have noticed that I put a bit more effort into my appearance for your party, although you probably didn’t realise that I did that for you. I hoped you liked the present! I was thinking of what to get you when I remembered a conversation we had a while back. I bet you thought I forgot, but I didn't. You keep making me weak, my little chicken wing, especially when you pinched my cheek out of nowhere like that. Are you trying to kill me off again? Why do you do things like this? You’re such a meanie! Anyway, I enjoyed the party. We played many games, though again I tried to avoid an awkward scene like that one time. Although I definitely wouldn’t mind sharing another kiss with you, I also know how awkward it must have been for you. For me, my heart was racing but I hope you didn’t feel that! We got to speak a bit, too, which was good, even if it was mainly about snacks. I hope you had a really amazing birthday! I wished you happy birthday at both the party and on the actual day. Even though it was a busy day for me, I still found time for you <3
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
There’s been so many parties recently, hasn’t there? I guess that’s what you get when you hang around with so many people hehe. I really enjoyed planning Kun’s party together! I’ve been getting closer to him, too. Now I see why you like him so much (the food is one reason ;)). It was good to see some of the boys again, I haven’t spoken to them much since November. I guess that’s what happens when the holidays take over though, everyone becomes so busy it’s hard to hang out until the new year. I heard that you met up with a few of the boys to see the new year in. Did you have fun? I was busy trying to make the cake for the party and completely missed the countdown, but oh well, there’s always next year, right? Did you enjoy your holidays? I forgot to ask you at the party since you kept being pulled away every two minutes by someone wanting to talk to you. That’s just the joys of being popular I guess :P. I can’t believe I’ve only just gotten to know Kun properly and he’ll be graduating soon. That’s what you get for hanging out with the older generation, hmm? He would hate me saying that, but I’m not wrong hehe. School starts again soon so we’ll be able to talk more in person instead of just through group chats (and Mark passing on messages for me). To be honest, I was surprised when you told me that you were staying in Korea over the Christmas holiday. I thought you might have spent some time at home, but I guess you did have us here to keep you company, and to buy your favourite foods for you whenever you felt homesick. I don’t believe you’ve ever told me about your family, I’d love to know more about them, but I didn’t want to ask before in case I made you sad <3
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
We just got back from a school trip not long ago. It was fun, wasn’t it? Apart from when we thought that Jungwoo broke his arm and Mark starting screaming cause he was panicking.. That was less fun. But hey, it’s a funny story to bring up whenever any of us want to tease him. I’m glad Jungwoo’s arm wasn’t broken though. Who was in your tent again? I think they put you with Lucas, no? I think I remember you telling him to stop screaming at one point, but that may have been my tired brain making up stories again. We got to talk a little, didn’t we? It was when the others were cooking food and the two of us watched them because we didn’t want to get involved in the ‘kitchen drama’. I did love doing a commentary of our imaginary cooking show, it was fun! Maybe we should ask to go camping more often, although maybe wrap the boys in bubble wrap so no one can break anything. I was kind of hoping that the trip would be to an amusement park or something similar, but I guess that might have been pretty hectic. Let’s face it, a ‘peaceful’ camping trip was chaotic enough, imagine what things would be like at an amusement park! I would still love to go to one, though. Who would be the responsible adult, though? Perhaps papa Kun, since he is old now hehe. By the way, did you receive any gifts for Valentine’s Day? I wanted to give you these letters but I made my identity too obvious, I wouldn’t be able to face you ever again if I had given you them. That’s why I settled for something that wasn’t too obvious. Maybe one year I’ll have the courage to say these things to you, but for now, I will love you from afar.
I remember the day I first saw you. How could I not? You were one of the students that moved to my school from China. I didn't know a thing about you then, but I knew from the moment I saw you that my life would change right then. You didn't say a word for a while, I remember that. You would always have an earpiece in one ear so that you could understand what people were saying. Do you remember being paired up with one of my friends? I won't deny, I was envious. I wish I could have been the one to work on your Korean with you and to translate worksheets for you. I wish that it had been me who showed you around the school, but I was grateful for the lunchtimes you spent at our table. You were wearing a green and white hoodie when we first spoke. Do you remember that? When I had learned that you were from China I had gone out of my way to learn your language so that I could talk to you. Even though my Chinese wasn't very good, and I kept pronouncing things wrong, you gave me the sweetest smile I had ever been given, and your eyes lit up because someone spoke your language, albeit very poorly. You didn't laugh at me, not even once. You always made sure to be polite when correcting me. You even gave me the cutest nickname I've ever been given. Xiăo tāngyuán, I believe it was? You gave me the nickname because my cheeks were squishy and reminded you of dumplings. I remember the little twinkle in your eyes the first time you called me that, and when you pinched my cheek. You probably felt how hot it was, didn't you? I wish I could say these things to you in person but I am content with watching from afar. After all, I can't possibly lose you if I never have you, right?
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I see you already caught the eye of the one and only Nakamoto Yuta. To be honest, I don't blame him. I instantly gravitated towards you as soon as I was introduced to you. I don't mind you hiding behind me everytime he tried to cling onto you, it's actually really cute. Is it because you know I won't do the same to you? I'm too shy to even try to hug you, but I do wish I could, even just once. Would you let me? I'm not completely sure why I'm asking that because you won't read this. You walked with me to the bus stop today because it was dark and I didn't want to walk alone. I hope you know how thankful I am for that, even though I didn't say much. The truth is, I was too shy to say much. I hope you didn't think that I didn't want to talk to you. My Chinese has gotten better, did you notice? I asked your friend to help me learn, Guanheng? I want to say his name was Guanheng. I really should know his name, we’re pretty close now. I want to grow closer to you, though. I know you’re still pretty self-conscious about your Korean, but it’s okay! If my Mandarin was better, I could help you, but I think I’ll leave that to the ‘professionals’ as they like to call themselves. I tried out for the school play today, although you already know that because I told you. You wished me luck, thank you. If I get the part, I’d like to think that you would be there. I always get excited to see my friends watch me perform but if you were there it would make me the happiest person in the entire world. I’m really nervous about it but I want to seem cool around you. If and when you see me on stage, I want you to look at me and think that I’m cool. Would it make you like me more? Or are shy people your type? I wish I knew how to read you, but that seems more difficult than Mandarin to learn.
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
Today you told me that you were thinking of auditioning for a role too. I remember the way your eyes twinkled as you told me about how much you love acting. I’m cheering you on! I hope you get a part, wouldn’t it be fun to perform together? I never realised we had so much in common. Why wouldn’t you tell me what part you were going for? I kept asking you to tell me but you kept teasing me. You’re so unfair, my little chicken wing. Still, I hope you get the role that you’re trying out for, you seem really excited about it. I’m a little bit nervous now. How good of an actor are you, exactly? Am I going to look like an idiot compared to you? I so want to impress you that I hope not. I saw you in the library today, too. I would have gone over and said hello but you looked so deep in thought and I didn’t want to disturb you. Has anyone ever told you how handsome you are when reading? I never thought about this much before but seeing you so lost in thought, so engrossed in what you were reading took my breath away. What were you reading? Was it a good book? Part of me wishes I had gone and talked to you now. I’m still learning Chinese by the way! Though I haven’t had much chance to practice it on you recently, I guess you’ve been pretty busy save from the quick conversations we’ve had. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I am always supporting you in all that you do, even if you never read this, I hope my words and actions in person have made this clear enough.
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I heard from Mark that you weren’t able to audition for the role because you are busy preparing for a dance competition at the moment. I never knew you were into dancing. I guess there’s still so much about you for me to learn, right? I wonder if there is any way that I can be there on the day to support you, I hope I can. If I can’t, would you show me your dancing? I imagine that you must be pretty talented to be doing an event like that. I feel as though these days we don’t get to talk as much as we used to, but that’s okay. I like our small conversations between classes. Something about you is so comforting for me, I can’t explain it. Perhaps it’s the smile that is perched on your face when you are with people you care about or when doing something you love. Was that too cheesy? It doesn’t matter, really. By the way, I got the part I auditioned for! Are you proud of me? I hope that you and some of the boys can come along, it would mean a lot to me, but it’s okay if you can’t! I know we’re not actually that close, so I don’t expect anything, but it would still be nice. I can only imagine with rehearsals taking up a lot of time, we will have even less time to spend together. I won’t pretend that it doesn’t bother me, but I’m hoping that once things settle back down for us both, we will get to hang out more. You’d like that, right? I can’t wait to show you how much my Mandarin has improved! I’ll write again soon :)
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
Today we got to spend some more time together at Johnny’s party. You had fun, right? It seemed like you did, even though I could tell that you were tired. Your friends are fun, I’m glad that Mark invited me along, I hope you didn’t mind me being there too. The cake was really good, wasn’t it? You ate a lot of it! That’s not a bad thing, I thought it was cute how eager you were to eat it, plus, it saved the others from wasting it on throwing it at each other. There is one thing about tonight that.. well, I don’t regret, but perhaps has me worried. I was dared to kiss the person I most admire, and well, that was you, are you really that surprised? You're so brave for coming to another country where you don't speak the language much and where you don't know anyone. You're also very very talented in everything that you do. I hope that this doesn’t weird you out in any way. I would hate for this to be the thing that pushes you away. I liked it though, your lips were really soft and tasted like vanilla frosting. I didn’t kiss you for nearly as long as I would have liked, but you are not mine to kiss like that. You are not mine at all, and will never be. Perhaps I should have chosen someone else, who I wouldn’t have to look at and feel bad for kissing so suddenly. Perhaps I should have been a party pooper and refused to join. I knew the boys would make me kiss someone, I’m just glad I got the chance to kiss you. I don’t know, my head is a mess, but you can probably already tell that. I really like you, so so bad.
Your little dumpling
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Dear first love,
I haven’t written a letter in a while. Things have been crazy recently, haven’t they? I’ve had rehearsals a lot and you’ve been practicing for your dance competition. The truth is, I secretly watched you practicing a couple of times. That sounds kinda weird, doesn’t it? I was just curious about your skills and can I say.. you’re even more talented than I thought you were going to be. I’m wishing you good luck again! I’m very, very proud of you, I hope you know that. I’m glad for having my weekends free, it means I was able to see you, even if it was just for a couple of hours a week. Did you miss me? I missed you so much. You seemed a little down last time, were you okay? I was a little surprised since you showed affection to Mark so suddenly. Of course I was a little envious of him, but it makes sense since we’re not that close yet, are we? I say yet because I want us to be, but we haven’t really been able to spend time together alone recently.. apart from yesterday. We both went along to support our friends at the football match. You looked really handsome in your red jumper! I was super nervous since Mark was also supposed to be watching with us, but he got sick so it was just us two together. Damn, I forgot how much I missed your smile, especially when it’s aimed at me. I didn’t realise it was possible for you to become even more handsome than before. We had the chance to talk properly, one on one. I wish we had more chances like that, I really loved getting to know you better. I hope this doesn’t sound weird but I love listening to you talk, your voice is very calming to me <3
Prompt: redamancy (n); the act of loving one who loves you, a love returned in full
Word count: 1,465
I wish I could tell you that this story ends well. In reality, that is a promise I couldn't possibly make. First, because my situation is completely and utterly impossible. Secondly, because this story hasn't ended yet. Although, I'm pretty sure that second point is obvious, considering I'm saying this right now. My best guess, however, is that this story will not be one that ends in happiness, or at least not my happiness. Why not, you ask? Perhaps I'm mistaken, perhaps I'm just pessimistic, right? But if you, too, were in my situation, I'm not so sure that you would be saying the same.
"Are you sure about this? Don't you think this whole thing is a bit…" Xiaojun flaps his arms around, making gestures towards his clothes, and to the fancy decorations adorning the ornate ballroom. The golden floor tiles have been polished to the point that you could probably see your own reflection. Light floods through the tall sunburst windows, making the blue marble columns gleam. Flecks of rainbow light are cast around the room from the giant golden chandelier hanging from the ceiling, which is decorated with golden panels. It's a scene that almost anyone would stare at in awe, but the man in front of me fits this place perfectly. I can't help but stare at him in as much awe as I did the room I'm currently standing in. He looks like a deity wearing a white suit embroidered with a floral blue pattern, a pair of white silk gloves in his hand. He looks over at me, breath catching in his throat, and his manservant follows his gaze to look at me. Suddenly I feel as though I'm an outsider intruding, even though I was invited here by the King and Queen themselves. Xiaojun's eyes glimmer as he takes a few steps towards me, the edges of his mouth curling upwards into a shy smile. My eyes flicker over to his manservant, who follows Xiaojun and also flashes me a smile.
"Y/N! Sorry, we weren't expecting you so soon. Shall I get you a drink?" I nod and he looks over at Xiaojun "Your majesty?" Xiaojun glances over at him, nodding. His manservant bows and walks away to fetch us both a drink. The prince takes my hand in his and I almost forgot how smooth his hand was. He spins us both around in the middle of the ballroom, laughing with me. Moments like these were far and few between, and they made everything seem much more normal, as if I wasn't some random Earl's child, but a royal, like him. As if he wasn't going to propose marriage to someone else tonight, not that he had much choice in the matter. As the crown prince, it is his duty to marry someone worthy of the throne. Although the list of worthy people most definitely doesn't include me, Xiaojun had always treated me as such. I'm not sure if he was forgetting that I was close, but not quite important enough to be worthy of him, or whether he doesn't care. All I know is that whenever I'm with him, whenever our hands are intertwined and lips locked, it feels as though it's where I belong. Suddenly, I'm not an earl's child, and he's not the heir to the throne. Suddenly we're two random people in love, with no barriers between us.
Xiaojun's manservant enters, giving us a warning look and handing us our drinks. I know what he was thinking. We shouldn't be this close. If the King and Queen saw us like this, I would no doubt be cast out from the ball. Me and him pull apart, acting as though we weren't too close. The manservant gives me an apologetic smile, which I respond to with a smile of my own. I was thankful that he could be trusted with this piece of information. That he wouldn't run and tell Xiaojun's parents, but help us to keep our love a secret. Soon, though, I would have to accept that our love was doomed from the start. Me and him couldn't marry, and I wasn't prepared to be the third person in a marriage, especially not a royal one. Tonight is the last night that me and him can be close to one another like this. My heart feels heavy at the thought of seeing him marry another person, but I knew from the start that this is how things would play out. I would just have to remind myself that he loves me, and that's all that should matter, no matter who he marries.
Guests start to pile in, greeting one another and moving over to greet the prince, and he gives every single one of them a dazzling smile. I stay nearby, but far away enough that it wouldn't seem obvious that I was trying to stay close to his side. In between greeting his guests, he glances at me, a smitten grin on his face and I lower my head, holding back a grin of my own. It's not long before the King and Queen enter, and at that point, I know that I should move away from his side. It's something neither me nor Xiaojun is happy about, but he understands. I don't belong in his close circle, and he doesn't belong in mine. Our circles should never cross but they do, they're almost one instead of two. I can barely help myself from stealing glances once in a while, and he does the same, being careful not to be caught. The King announces the official start of the ball, and a pianist begins to play a beautiful melody. I wish to dance with Xiaojun, just one song that will forever be our song, our song that will remind us of the night we said goodbye. However, I know that I won't get the chance to. Princes don't dance with people like me.
But Xiaojun proves me wrong when, with just a few songs left, he slips through the crowd and takes my hand, asking for a dance. So this is it, our last dance together. After this dance, he will be engaged to someone else, and I will be alone once again. But in the back of my head, I remind myself that he loves me, unconditionally and wholeheartedly. And that's enough for me to live with. He takes my hand in his and stares deep into my eyes. His expression is sullen and I think he knows, that this is the last night for us. But still his eyes sparkle as he looks at me as though I'm his entire world, and I stare at him the same way. A gentle light cascades through the glass dome above us and takes my breath away. We dance for what feels like an eternity. In that moment there is only us. Everyone else around us doesn't exist, and it's not until the song ends and people around us clap that I realise we were being watched. I shoot a panicked look over to Xiaojun's manservant, and he shares the same look. I break apart from Xiaojun, but he holds onto my elbow, stopping from leaving him. In his eyes are galaxies that I'm pretty certain haven't been discovered yet and I want nothing more than to fall into his arms. But I can't. I shake my head at him, trying to move away again, but he doesn't let me. Instead he moves closer to me, stroking my hand with his thumb.
"Mother," he looks back at the Queen "Father," he shifts his gaze to the King "This is my decision." Both of them stay silent. My heart feels as though it will burst through my chest. Everyone around us is staring and whispering, and I'm certain that I know what they're thinking. How can a prince hold someone like me this way? How can he look at me like this? His parents move closer, giving Xiaojun a stern look, but he doesn't back down. "You told me to choose, and I have. I chose a long time ago. This is the person I want to marry. No, this is the person I will marry." I stare sheepishly at the King and Queen, waiting for them to dismiss his words, but they don't. "So you can either respect my decision and allow our marriage, or I will give up my title and marry them without your blessing." He stares back at me, squeezing my hand. At that point, I'm not sure how our story will end, but all I know is that he loves me, and I love him. So so what if our story ends in shards of broken hearts?
Based on: Snow White and Rose Red. I changed quite a bit of the story to make it more angsty but if you squint hard enough maybe you’ll find some references to the original fairytale! (The boys appear later on if you’re wondering where they are)
Word count: 3,360
A/N: Idk what this is to be honest. I’m not the best at dystopian but I tried my best lmao
Gyeoul used to remember it so clearly. The town was once bustling with life. Every corner turned led to a busy road. The sights, the smells, the sounds far away but not forgotten. She could barely remember the days that she used to pass by the large bakery, distinguishable not only by its heavenly smells, but also by its odd shape. Now? All that was left behind was the shell of the paradise it once was. Gone too were the people that kept the town alive. Several years earlier, there had been a great rebellion, and in the weeks that followed, people started to flee one by one. None of those remaining knew where exactly they went. None of them heard a single word from any of them again. Had they packed up and fled to another town to start a better life? Had they even had a happy ending? Gyeoul could only imagine what could have happened in such dangerous times. Still, perhaps they had had the right idea to leave. And she would have, if she didn't have her sister to worry about. Yeoreum was always known to everyone as the warm one. Pretty much everyone in the town thought of her as a friend, and she thought the same of them. She was full of laughter, despite all of the chaos she'd seen. Her sister, on the other hand, was more quiet and withdrawn. Gyeoul was far happier reading or tending to their garden - or what was left of it. Sure, the only books that hadn't been destroyed during the uprising were fairy tales, and she'd read all of those a thousand times over, but she couldn't care less.
The two sisters were inseparable. They spent almost every minute by each other's side, as they had done since they were young. But now, as Yeoreum spotted two figures dressed head to toe in dark grey clothing, this was threatened. She looked back at her little sister sleeping peacefully and made a promise to herself that she would do whatever it took to keep her safe. Yeoreum rushed about, though being careful not to disturb her sister. Luckily, her and Gyeoul were similar enough in height and body shape that she was able to slip into her sister's clothing. She had heard rumours that the rebel leader wanted to kill anyone who opposed his rule. After the uprising ended and he had seized control over the surrounding areas, Yeoreum had reluctantly given her support in order to keep her and her sister safe from their guards. But now, it seemed, the protection didn't extend to Gyeoul, only her. Yeoreum slipped on her sister's white coat and removed the necklace from around her neck, placing it into Gyeoul's clasped hands. "Stay strong." She whispered before leaving the house as quietly as she could. She hoped that her sister would be alright on her own. The thought of being apart from her broke her heart, but she knew that escaping at this point would be impossible. This was the only way she knew. As soon as she stepped out of the house, the guards escorted her away. Yeoreum's heart pounded but she reminded herself to stay calm. Panicking would only make things worse for her, she thought. The guards led her to a military-like truck, rammed full of other people from various towns. It felt as though she was being transported to some sort of prison. Yeoreum fell forward as one of the guards slammed the tailgate shut. Two rows of faces stared down at her, making her feel self-conscious. She picked herself up, barely being able to sit down before the truck started to move.
Gyeoul woke up to hear the sound of a truck driving away. She sat up from her bed, her sister's necklace promptly falling to the floor. Her heart dropped. She raced to the window, just managing to catch a glimpse of her sister staring back at her before the truck disappeared off into the distance. Her lungs hurt as though she had breathed in acid instead of air. This couldn't be happening. What was she without her sister, her flesh and blood? How was she supposed to cope without her? It was something she didn't even want to consider, but it was already her reality. She scrambled outside in her pyjamas, waiting for Yeoreum to come back. This had to be an evil prank, but she knew that Yeoreum would never put her through that. A loud growl to her right caught her attention. Had one of the guards caught her? Was she going to be kidnapped and punished? All sorts of scenarios flooded her mind, but none of them could prepare her for what would happen next. She turned her body to face the direction of the noise. A large, raven-coloured bear stood in front of her now, staring directly at her. The bear took a step towards her, and Gyeoul instinctively took a step backwards. All of a sudden, the bear stood on his back legs and growled once more. Knowing what usually followed, Gyeoul braced herself for her inevitable death. She fell to the floor, curling into a ball. Yet the bear's teeth and claws never once ripped into her skin. Growls thundered around her, abruptly ending with a thud that made the ground around her tremble. Once everything had gone quiet again, she lifted her head, nearly jumping out of her skin at the sight of a smaller black bear whimpering and limping away. What had happened? She turned around to see the bear from before sitting behind her. When it caught her gaze, it bowed its head before nuzzling against her. Had this fierce animal actually protected her? She lifted a hand to brush the fur of its neck, only to be met with a dark red liquid. Gyeoul rushed inside and collected some cloth to tend to its injuries. It was the least the bear deserved, she thought. The bear let out a high pitched howl as she dabbed at its neck with the cloth. Her heart wrenched at seeing the animal in pain, but she had to clean the wound. The bear relaxed, resting its head on her shoulder to give her better access to its neck. When she was done, her heart settled back to its usual rhythm. Perhaps not everything in the world was there to harm her, after all.
For the next few weeks, the bear visited Gyeoul every other day, keeping her company and easing her heartache, even if it was only a little. She missed her sister deeply, but she had no idea of where the rebel stronghold was. No one in the town knew. If they did, surely their friends and family would already have been rescued by now, if they were even still alive. She made it her mission to find out. She had to find out where they had taken Yeoreum to. Nothing else mattered much to her. Gyeoul still held out hope that someone would be able to help her, but as of yet, she had met no such person. Until one day. It happened whilst she was walking through the woods, taking refuge amongst the trees from the seemingly never-ending heatwave. She nearly missed them, but the occasional sniffle drew her attention to a hunched figure at the foot of a tree stump. "Hello?" She called out to them, and the sniffles immediately died down. The figure looked over their shoulder, slowly standing up. The man was short and scruffy, and there were thick bags under his eyes. His fingers were adorned with bejeweled rings, which seemed out of place compared to the rest of his appearance.His tired eyes looked up at Gyeoul. "My family… our soil has dried up and we have no food left. We have absolutely nothing!" He cried, falling to his knees. Gyeoul looked back in the direction of her house. She and Yeoreum had been surprisingly lucky this year, so they had extras to spare. Gyeoul knelt in front of him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"If you wait here, I can help you. I have some to spare." He nodded and she collected some food for him, making her way back to the clearing in the forest. He rushed over to her, snatching the crate of food from her and examining its contents."Humph." Gyeoul was taken aback. "Is this all I get? Useless!" He complained, turning away from her, glaring back at her over his shoulder. Perhaps someone like him wouldn't be of any help to her, after all.
It was some time later, and Gyeoul was beginning to grow restless without her sister. Surely someone must be able to help her find her, but who? There were barely any townspeople left anymore, and those that stayed mostly kept to themselves now. At least the drought had ended, although there was still no end in sight for the heat. Now, there was water for the garden and for taking a bath after a long day of tending to her flowers. Water had also returned to the nearby lake several days ago, and hopefully soon the wildlife would do the same. Gyeoul was sat by the side of the lake, reading one of her fairytales. This time, however, she didn't feel any sense of joy from doing this. Recent events only served to remind her that such stories were just that, stories. There was never going to be a fairy godmother to wave her wand and magic all of her problems away, nor was a handsome prince going to wake her from a poison-induced sleep with "true love's kiss". All of a sudden, she heard frantic splashing about in the lake and looked up from her book to see the same man she met before. Instinctively, she jumped in the lake to save the old man from drowning. She held onto him as she helped the two of them back on land. "Hey!" He called out to her, eyebrows narrowed. "I didn't ask you to jump in there after me, young lady." Gyeoul was, once again, dumbfounded. Did he not realise what could have happened if she didn't jump in there after him?
Folding her arms over her chest, she gave him a stern look. "Maybe you should learn some manners. Someone gives you food because you're hungry and you don't even say thank you. Someone saves you from drowning and you shout at them. Maybe next time I ought to stand by and do nothing!" Gyeoul turned away and walked back home, picking up her book on the way. She didn't look back at the old man, not even once.
Gyeoul never usually ventured out, but she'd heard about a man in the next town over who knew where the rebel hideout was and decided it wouldn't hurt to visit him. This town was not much different from her own except the style of the buildings. Here, the houses were much taller, and more of them were still intact, unlike the ones back home. She made note of the house's address, confirming to herself that she was at the right place, before knocking on the door. A familiar grumble came from behind the door. Of all the people she had to seek out, why did it have the be the rude man? "Ah, you. What d'ya want?" He asked, scrunching his nose up. Gyeoul blinked, surprised that she had ended up here.
"I heard that you know where the rebel hideout it. Can you tell me where it is? My sister was taken and I really need to find-"
"I'll help you. If you help me move my stock." He pointed at the stockroom with his thumb. Gyeoul was close to turning around and leaving. She couldn't believe that he was asking for help after being ungrateful to her before, but she needed to find her sister. Without a single (verbal) complaint, she did as the old man told her to. She stepped into the room he had pointed to, picking up one of the boxes. A slam of metal rang out behind her, causing her to snap her head to look over at the source of the noise. Figuring that the door had shut due to a breeze, Gyeoul attempted to push the door open, only to be met with resistance. So this was the thanks she got for helping the old man. She really should have said no this time. She slumped on the floor, bringing her knees to her chest. How was she supposed to find her sister like this? Everything felt hopeless at that point, but a thundering roar outside gave her a flicker of hope. Gyeoul pounded her palm on the door, begging for someone to help.
"Stand back!" An unfamiliar voice called out from behind the door. She scooted over to the corner, waiting for whatever was supposed to happen. In a matter of seconds, the same black bear she had befriended came crashing through the door. She rushed over to it, hugging it. A few tears slipped out of her eyes, relieved to be free from the old man's cruel trick. "I spoke to the old man. He says that he knows where the rebel hideout is. If he's true to his word, then he can help us." The voice said. Gyeoul stared blankly at the bear. There was a sigh. "No, it's not the bear talking. It's me." She looked up to see the town mayor riding on the bear. She had almost forgotten how stunning he was, but she had little time to care about being so close to an attractive man given the current situation. He patted behind him, indicating for me to sit behind him. She climbed up onto the bear carefully with the help of Mayor Kim.
"Can we really trust him? He tricked me into here after being rude to me for helping him before. What's to say he won't lead us down the wrong path?" Gyeoul questioned, suspicious of the old man's motives. "And how did you know where I wanted to go? How did you know I'd be here? What do you mean 'help us?" She gripped onto his shirt to stop herself falling as they started to move.
"You sure ask a lot of questions, don't you?" Jungwoo chuckled to himself. "Sometimes you need to have faith in people. I've assured him that this is no joking matter. He knows better than to trick the mayor." Gyeoul nodded. "Let's say the bear and I have a special bond. I've been deploying him to check on the townspeople and he seemed distressed today, so I saddled him and he led me here to you. When he saw me, the old man told me what had happened. The other part… it's not important." He turned his face away from Gyeoul, a pained expression etched on his face.
The journey to the rebel hideout was long and by the end of it, both Gyeoul and the old man were grumbling. Mayor Kim, however, stayed relatively silent the whole time. The only times he spoke up was to ask the old man where to go. Gyeoul couldn't believe he could be so trusting. She certainly wasn't, not when it came to him. When it came to Mayor Kim, however… well, that was a different story. He seemed to be one of the few higher-ups who actually cared about the people. She wished that he would speak more, but he seemed a man of few words. "Mayor Kim, I hate to disturb you but can we stop somewhere? I'm getting thirsty." Gyeoul asked.
He turned to look at her, giving her a small smile before pulling a bottle out of his bag. Their fingertips brushed as she took the bottle from him. "Please, you don't have to call me Mayor Kim all the time. Call me Jungwoo. It makes us feel more friendly, don't you think?" She returned his smile, thanking him.
"All of this is very well and all but how do you plan to infilt-" the old man spoke up, just as Jungwoo's bear approached a large grey building. Tall, twisting spires burst from the roof, towering over them and casting a dark shadow. The door opened with a loud creak. "Well that was easy."
Jungwoo hummed. "Too easy. Be on guard." The bear cautiously walked towards the open door. Nothing had happened so far, but surely infiltrating the rebel hideout shouldn't be so easy. The door to the hideout closed with a slam behind them. Was it a trap? Gyeoul was beginning to think so.
Until…"Gyeoul!" A familiar voice called out. Gyeoul got off the bear, looking around for her sister. With a hum, lights flooded the large space. "Gyeoul!" Gyeoul turned around, laying her eyes on her sister, who was surprisingly unharmed. In fact, she didn't look distressed at all. The sisters hugged each other tightly as Jungwoo and the old man also got off of the bear. Jungwoo looked around, seeing a familiar figure walking towards him. It was as if time suddenly stopped still. He was safe. And warm. And… the leader?
"Is that really you?" Jungwoo's voice was shaky as he approached the fair haired man. He grinned back at Jungwoo, pulling him in for a hug.
"Why didn't you come with me? You could have saved yourself all of that trouble!" The older man scolded him. "You know I wouldn't have ever put you in danger." His expression softened. He was just glad to have his brother back.
"You're the leader? You're the reason we're in this mess!" Jungwoo's voice became even more strained, refusing to believe that his brother could possibly involved in something so terrible.
"No!" Doyoung shouted. His younger brother jumped back, afraid. Doyoung sighed. "No." He repeated, calmly this time. "We've been trying to trace people to rescue them from the nearby towns and cities. We freed us. We can be happy now. It was never our intention for anyone to get hurt, surely you know that. We overthrew a corrupt system and rescued those who were trapped in unsafe areas. Come on, I'm your brother. Do you think I'd ever hurt you? Or anyone?"
Jungwoo looked up at him, a tear rolling down his cheek. He looked back at Gyeoul. "I.. Of course not. I just missed you. You didn't tell me any of this." Doyoung pulled him in for another hug, squeezing him tight.
Doyoung's gaze wandered and fell on the old man. "I see you rescued another friend. Welcome, sir." He approached the old man, who looked on at the brothers in confusion. He hadn't thought about this.
"You might want to keep an eye on him. He's somewhat of a trickster. I think he's also allergic to saying thank you." Gyeoul crossed her arms over her chest.
Doyoung stared at the man in silence. "He can go free, I don't take prisoners." The door swung open and the old man breathed a sigh of relief, beginning to walk away. "But," Doyoung's voice rang out, making him pause. "I hope this journey has taught you something. Do not take people's kindness for granted. From now on, I hope that you will give back the kindness that was shown to you, and learn to see the error of your ways." The old man stared back at Doyoung, head hanging down in shame before wandering away into the distance. The two brothers stared at each other, hardly believing that they would be reunited after so long spent apart.
"Well, that's not the way things were supposed to turn out." Jungwoo chuckled to himself, scratching the back of his neck. Doyoung and the two sisters looked at him, wondering what he meant. "I was supposed to infiltrate this place, defeat the rebels and rescue my brother and Gyeoul's sister, but as it turns out, they didn't need rescuing!" The others laughed along. "Honestly who knows how I was planning to defeat you, though."
The flower shop was just across the road from the convenience store you always visited. It was pretty old by this point, the outside taken over by rust and flaking paint. But it was still beautiful as ever. You never really had much reason to step through those doors, as your need to buy flowers was rare, but you couldn't help hearing whispers around town about the cute guy who worked there. You had never managed to catch a glimpse of his face, though you did see the back of his head a couple of times. You were curious, but not curious enough to visit. Why would you? It's not as if you needed to buy flowers for anyone, and it would be pointless going there just to check out a cute boy. And that's the way things remained, people gushing over the cute boy who worked there, and you listening in, heart growing warmer by the second, but never stopping by to see him. Jungwoo, his name was. A voice like honey, you'd heard. A kind of aura that would make you fall head over heels in an instant, apparently. According to all the people in town, he was bright-eyed, full of laughter and happiness, always wanting to make new friends, but also the kind of person who was gentle and made everyone around him feel at ease. He sounded exactly the kind of guy you would end up falling head first for, and you weren't going to deny the fact that imagining him in your head made your heart flutter. But still you didn't give in to temptation.
That was until your co-worker announced that she was leaving. She had been your rock for years and you seriously didn't know what you would do without her. You tell the truth, you cried in the bathroom when she announced that she was moving away. You could take it if she was just moving companies, but cities as well? This, you decided, was a perfectly solid reason to buy flowers, and you knew exactly what shop you wanted to buy them from. The rain was hammering down as you approached the door, only to see the sign saying closed. You sighed, so that walk had been for nothing and now there was a chance you could get sick from being in the rain too long. This was great. "Ah! I'm late! I'm sorry, I fell asleep late and my alarm didn't go off and I don't know why I'm telling you all this because your not my boss and-" he hunched over, panting to catch his breath back. "I don't think I've ever met you before, have I?" He gave you the sweetest smile and you felt it hit you in the gut. He was only serving to prove them all right and you were starting to fear falling hard for the boy you had only just met. His voice was indeed like honey, smooth and sweet and you could so easily get lost in it forever and honestly you wouldn't even mind. But they didn't quite tell you about the way his eyes sparkled, how they seemed so alive. You smiled back at him as he fumbled for the key to open up. You swore that you could see a slight tint of red to his ears, but it could have just been the cold.
The flower shop was even cozier than you had imagined. Jungwoo chuckled as you as you looked around in wonder. He didn't ask you any questions at first, and you were kind of disappointed because you longed to have a conversation with him. You let your fingers reach out and touch the flowers, feeling the cloud-like petals. "Ahh, lavender rose, love at first sight." You heard his voice behind you, so close you could almost feel his breath on your skin. Your face heated up at the thought, moving on to another flower, admiring its beauty. You leaned in to smell its perfume when you heard his voice behind you again. "White carnations for innocent and pure love." You chewed your lip, face still burning and wishing that the next flower could have another meaning besides love. The next one was a lot different to the first two, and you hoped that it had nothing to do with love, but luck appeared not to be on your side today. "Morning glory, not many customers pay that one much attention." You glanced at him standing beside you. He grinned, his whole face seeming to glow. "That one is really sweet though because it means affection. If someone gives you these, hold onto them." Your heart filled with warmth. Indeed, if anyone gave you a flower meaning affection, your heart would melt on the spot. You hummed and moved onto another, now very conscious of the cute boy's presence beside you, his gaze following you around shyly, wanting to make proper conversation but not really knowing how. Jungwoo was never usually like this. Usually he was full of conversation, but there was something about you that he couldn't quite place his finger on. His gaze flickered down to the baby pink petals you were caressing ever so carefully. "You know, pink roses mean happiness." He couldn't help but fill up with warmth, his heart feeling as if it wanted to fly but he told himself to get a grip. You mentally patted yourself on the back for finding a flower that wasn't attached to love, not wanting to think about love and him any longer. Meanwhile, he had somehow plucked up enough courage to say the words he'd been meaning to say. "It also means you should totally go on a date with the boy standing next to you." His face flushed a deep pink, instantly cringing at himself. And you? Well you think you just fell for the boy beside you.
You came back to the flower shop just a few days later, the sky now much clearer and brighter than the day the two of you met. Jungwoo beamed at you, making your heart speed up in and instant. "I would like to buy some flowers." You instantly kicked yourself. Of course you were buying flowers, you were in a shop that sold flowers and flowers alone. He chuckled, leaning his chin on his hand. "I would like some lavender roses." You chewed your lip, avoiding looking at him. Jungwoo's face heated up, remembering the events just a few days prior. He quietly gathered the flowers you requested and waited for your next request. "And some white carnations." He wasn't sure if you were doing this on purpose, but his heart was going wild remembering what he had told you. "And I think some morning glory, too." He collected the flowers from their pots as you had requested, avoiding eye contact out of fear that he would fumble over his words. You leaned a little closer, a strange sense of confidence washing over you. "I think I'd like a pink rose just for measure. It means I would definitely love to go on a date with you." Jungwoo swore his heart just exploded, now completely unable to function at all. The only thing he could think of was how thankful he was for the rain.
"Do you have to be so fucking annoying?" Renjun growled. His hair was messed up from the amount of tugging he'd been doing to it and his eyes burned like two raging blazes. His honey voice seemed to spit poison straight at me. He strode over to me, making me back away from him. His pace was quick and it was only a couple of seconds before I had no escape, my back now pressed against the cold wall. His jaw clenched tightly and his eyes bore into mine with an expression that could only be described as pure and utter hatred. He had hated me from the moment I had walked into his pretty little kingdom. I was a trespasser. Renjun was well aware of how close I was to his friends, and he hated it. I reckon he felt threatened by someone else stealing his friends away. I guess baby never learned how to share. I couldn't help but laugh at how pathetic it was. Him, jealous that someone else could have that kind of friendship with his friends. Jealous that someone else could stand in the spotlight. Jealous that someone else might take his throne, that he won't be the one they all look up to anymore. It seemed as though Renjun didn't appreciate my laughter, because the next second, he had my hair in his grip. I hissed at the stinging sensation. "Shut up!" He said through gritted teeth. I raised an eyebrow at him. Or what?
"What are you gonna do? Shove your dick in my mouth?" I joked, rolling my eyes at his attempt to be intimidating. He didn't scare me in the slightest. Maybe he should have, because the longer I watched his face for a reaction, the more I realised I wasn't going to get one. Renjun's face remained unphased by my remark, his only response was to keep his gaze locked on me. After a while, he chuckled, a smirk playing on his lips, which sent a shiver straight down my spine. If his stupid little smirk wasn't so sexy I would have slapped him by now. Without any warning, his hand reached up to grip around my throat. He leaned in close, his body pressing close to mine, the scent of his cologne only making things worse. I felt his warm breath on my ear before I heard him speak again. "If that's what it takes, sweetheart."
