tossing the presidential salad

carolina. xxvii. you can only love me when there's no one looking over your shoulder.

[xanakin]

get to know me meme: [2/5] favorite female characters - agent carolina (red vs blue)

[catchymemes]

[xanakin]

i have a friend who owns a couple dispensaries and yesterday we were at the bar and he threw me a baggie of some weed which i appreciate but it smells insane and my purse reeks now and let me tell you smelling like weed is like top 10 most embarrassing things you can be

[tall]

[woodwool]

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

[anarqueeen]

I'll have you know I was "a pleasure to have" in the torture dungeon

[maxxie-or-smth]

i am an unreliable narrator both because i do not remember and also i love to lie

[xanakin]

tell me why i went to a bra shop last night and they measured me for the first time in god knows when and they dont carry my size in store because im a HH!!!!!!!!!! that size is not real i am sorry

[yellow-cat]

some days are really hard and it can be difficult to understand why. but usually its probably because my blood is haunted

[xanakin]

OKAY LAST PHOTOS FOR A WHILE IM SORRY MY WHOLE BLOG IS JUST PROM PHOTOS but these are what the newspaper got of us last night!!! that photographer must’ve really loved us

[xanakin]

i wont lie, high school lina was onto some shit!

[gumi-megpoidd]

I am whatever gender has the shortest line at the bathroom

[gumi-megpoidd]

No need I think

[maxi-is-not-well]

​I see this one going places

[gumi-megpoidd]

Yeah. The bathroom

[im-a-vertebrate]

ah but which bathroom

[gumi-megpoidd]

the one with the shortest line did you not read the post

[xanakin]

ive been dating my current boyfriend for close to 4 years. tell me why i still get misty eyed when i remember my ex used to never let me open a door

[sightofsea]

kill me once, shame on you. kill me twice how did you do that

[crazysodomite]

"i have free will" no you don't. My spore compels you.

[inthepercolator]

Gif of all time for sure

[xanakin]

yall i am crying but im at a fancy hotel bar with my bf where celebrities stay in my town, and my bf looks so similar to dave grohl we get comments constantly. well the bartenders daughters friend came in the bartender said its dave so my bf signed a napkin and took a photo lord we’re going to hell

[weirdness-is-good]

[totallyfubar]