Nights in White Satin Review
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
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Here's a review I wrote back in 2020. You know, when the world was falling apart, Linda.
According to the writer Pausanias, who thoroughly recorded the impressions of his journey through Greece, there were three maxims inscribed on the walls of Apollo’s Temple in Delphi. The first aphorism, Know thyself, has been taken up and explored over the years from different perspectives, not only in later literature but also in the fields of philosophy and sociology as well. A dear friend and colleague of mine who used to travel a lot (that is, before the COVID-19 pandemic), visited the island a few years back as part of her itinerary, and she had, as she would describe to us later on, a spiritual experience while she walked through the ruins of the temple. She used ‘spiritual’ in the broad sense of the word, as she tried to convey the experience of the journey, not only the literal journey she had embarked on but the journey of her life as a whole. As she sat to take her outstanding surroundings, she was taken over by an acute feeling that she was discovering new, or maybe just hidden, corners herself. Suddenly, she felt like something beyond herself was casting a new light on her, and she couldn’t help to feel both overwhelmed and grateful for that.
In Nights in White Satin, we assist a similar double journey: we accompany Trixie as she moves out of her small town in Wisconsin to work as a baker in her Aunt’s hotel in Boston; and we witness her inner journey, the emotional path that unravels before her as she leaves her dysfunctional (and abusive) family behind and gains a new sense of autonomy and control over her life. This fiction is a coming of age story set in the late ’60s, a turbulent and exciting time frame, bursting with the raw potential and vibrating pulse of life, again, in the broad sense of the word (a pulse we get to experience through the music both depicted in the fiction and the Spotify playlist the author compiled for the occasion).
Zamo-95 explores with tender sensibility the broad scope of human relationships, both personal and professional, as Trixie finds herself in a new job that pushes her out of her comfort zone and challenges her to navigate new experiences: a fresh start, a blank slate, a new beginning for a small-town girl in her early twenties. Her aunt Nina, a sort of angel or fairy godmother if you’re more into fairy tales, triggers this journey with a job proposal, but it’s Katya’s character, an outsider in multiple levels, the one that plays an even bigger role in it. First as a friend, and later on as a lover, Katya will be the cornerstone on which Trixie will begin to build her adult life, a life that will not be without its ups and downs, as life often is.
The transition from friendship to a romantic relationship is described and addressed in such a thoughtful and impeccable pace, that it feels natural, if not inevitable. Thus, the bond between Trixie and Katya doesn’t feel rushed, on the contrary, it builds up with such ease as we get to know them as they get to know each other, but only because they get to know themselves first. Likewise, it’s not obvious either, it develops through time and uncomfortable situations. Trixie’s sexual initiation as often happens, is not exempt from uncomfortable and violent situations. Zamo-95 narrates Trixie’s first sexual experience with Biff with a remarkable and blunt frankness that only enhances her subsequent loving sexual exploration with Katya. As a queer reader in the ace spectrum, as I read that first sexual encounter, I couldn’t help to feel challenged by it: it just hit too close to home. But, as often happens in media representation, there were no low blows or unrealistic exacerbations of heteronormative violence: what you read is what, I dare to say, a lot of us went through in our own life journey. Naturally, it is an uncomfortable (to say the least) rite of passage, but extremely relatable nonetheless, and how the author transforms that conflictive milestone into the negative horizon we leave behind, shifting the attention to Trixie’s true feelings for Katya, is one big yes to me as a reader. With reasonable cautiousness, Zamo-95 takes our hand and guides us as the bond between Trixie and Katya unfolds and thrives with such a sensible pace, that it felt like a spiritual journey in itself: as Trixie and Katya know themselves and each other, I felt that a light was shone in some dark corners of my own life journey, and for that, I’m extremely grateful and in awe with the author’s work.
I can’t wait to see what else Zamo-95 has in store for us. I’m sure it’s gonna be a hell of a ride.
Sunday. October 11th, 2020.
