reeling

echo / 24 pembroke 2032

[yamazawaren]

Still keep being ashamed of asking for things i need or want..

But i am learning, i am reminding myself to still do the other thing

I always remember what my first boss said to me, "if you don't ask, the answer is always No"

[yamazawaren]

Unresolved childhood and teen issues really haunt me. It just will continue haunting me forever. Like it's the nature of things.

[yamazawaren]

Hard to do things that requires a "group" setting..

Cant even find myself anyone who'll play badminton with me.. or go with me somewhere

Maybe i just have to ask to get one.. idk

[achillesinhighheels]

[iusedtobecharming-deactivated20]

Do we have a franz kafka diary entry for july 1st, i want to know what he thinks!!!

[rehearsing]

happy too tired July everyone

[achillesinhighheels]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

also I don't think parents "these days" are uniquely terrible, I just think neglect is showing up in new ways as technology progresses. today's ipad kid would've been wandering around in a ditch alone all day and night before. parents not wanting to have to deal with children is not a new phenomenon.

[yamazawaren]

Now that I'm back to unemployment, my parents are pushing me to study again...

My father's telling me about how my cousins won't look up to me, as if that's what i want... which i told him that i don't

Still acting like they can use the compare route on me... saying how they have professional titles/licenses

Now they're putting pressure on the youngest, my brother, to have that degree and title.

I don't want to blame but man.....

[achillesinhighheels]

[forestdeity]

everything is divine punishment if youre delusional enough

[yamazawaren]

I need drugs to regulate me for my entire life..

[yamazawaren]

Been building my back and it's getting kinda beefy... idek what I'm targeting i just want to lose fat and spend time in the gym

[subaru-copilot]

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

[soracities]

what frank o’hara said: “i’ve loved too little and i’m tired of running”

[yamazawaren]

Had my last day at work with my recent company just this friday...

I want to take a break and reconnect with myself. I want to go back to therapy and meds...

Never thought I'd see the day that I'd say those words, but yeah. Growth?

I want to be calmer and be more confident. Be more true to myself. Discover my value. Be kinder to myself.

[hewoweens]

u can be boiling alive in your mind for months and then on a random tuesday ur head gets so clear and life is worth living again and you're like damn what was all that about then

[yamazawaren]

I'm back with 5htp. Just wanna sleep better. Been on it since Monday(?)

Just wanna feel calm and at ease.